Pain Fetish

“If you can’t forget that man, we’ll never get anywhere.”

Dropping these words, Qi Han went upstairs.

It only took him a cigarette to put away all his wretchedness and return to his gentlemanly, decisive look.

The youngest president of the Chamber of Commerce in the capital, belonging to the top 10% of the world’s 3S level Alphas, with the pheromones of a rare white bellflower, he was a true upper-class dignitary, the proud son of heaven who made countless people admire him. The difference between him and Fu Ge was like between cloud and mud.

Qi Han’s eyes became even more indifferent than when they had just reunited, as if he had made some decision and had to pose accordingly.

He would come home every day, but would not say a word to Fu Ge, yet he would not refuse when Fu Ge sneaked up on him, and there was a cold gentleness emanating from his body.

After seeing Fu Ge enter the kitchen, he would put off his meals and would wait at the table, eating all the ugly burnt dishes no matter how unpalatable they were, cherishing them as if eating them once meant one less time to eat them (the expression is actually about seeing someone one time meaning one less time to see them, that is, people always part and you should cherish every meeting).

He cancelled his night activities and sat in the living room after dinner with his legs crossed, reading some English or German picture books by the night light.

The Alpha’s voice was low, soft and husky, reminiscent of the rainy Paris and beer-scented German streets, the voice that was the cure for Fu Ge’s nightmares.

Fu Ge liked to sit on the thick fluffy carpet, leaning against the soft sofa, listening to the picture books and observing Qi Han’s frowning eyebrows a little bit.

But he would always fall asleep, and when he woke up again, his head would be on Qi Han’s lap, and occasionally he would be carried to the bed.

Whenever this happened, Fu Ge would do everything he could to keep Qi Han.

Unbuttoning his pyjamas, making some humiliating movements, clasping the hem of Qi Han’s clothes hard with his fingers, or kneeling on the bed and kissing his palm very reverently.

“Sir, shall we do it once? I’m so… horny for you.”

Qi Han freed the corner of his clothes, with a flash of misery in his dark eyes, “No.”

Fu Ge pursed his lips, his voice sticky and hoarse: “Then will you stay in my room to sleep? I’ve already warmed up the blanket.”

“No.” Qi Han still said the same thing.

Fu Ge was about to cry, his quiet sobbing particularly distinct in the darkness: “Then can… can you, please, give me a hug, please… Will you hurt me, please…”

Qi Han turned his head, his voice trembling: “Go to sleep.”

After that night, he never returned home, as if he was physically saying “no” to Fu Ge’s advances and waiting desperately for judgement.

There was only one person left in the huge house, the person who didn’t belong here, dutifully waiting for the owner to visit.

At the beginning of the second week, the doorbell rang.

For a moment Fu Ge thought he was hallucinating again. He rushed out of his bedroom as fast as he could, yet after opening the door, full of hope, he saw not Qi Han, but an old servant.

“Hello, Young Master Fu, I am Master Qi’s housekeeper. I will take care of you for the next week. Just call me Uncle Gu.” The housekeeper said respectfully.

Fu Ge pursed his lips and his shoulders abruptly slumped. He looked like a puppy abandoned by its owner, staring into the distance sadly with its ears drooping.

“Hello, Uncle Gu. May I ask what Sir is doing?”

“Master has entered the rut period and is now in the isolation room and won’t be back until a week later.”

“The rut period…” Fu Ge muttered, repeating these words. “But I remember that many years ago Zhongke Pharmaceuticals developed a new powerful inhibitor for Alphas that could dissolve the fever of the rut period in five minutes, how come Sir didn’t—”

“Young Master Fu!” The housekeeper interrupted him sternly and shook his head again after seeing his dumbfounded face, as if helpless, “Master, he is allergic to inhibitors, and Zhongke Pharmaceuticals, remember not to mention these words in front of him. Don’t make him angry.”

After the housekeeper said that, he smiled, “But Zhongke Pharmaceuticals has been in decline for more than five years, few young people know about it now, Young Master Fu…”

“It seems… It’s because their president happened to be from my family and I took an extra look at the news when it came out.”

The housekeeper nodded and asked no more questions.

“3S level Alpha allergic to inhibitors, so how is Sir’s rut period… how does he go through it?”

The housekeeper was stunned for a moment, “Has to endure it…” He raised his eyes, looked at the locked room on the second floor and said, “That room was just used last month, the smell of blood might not even have dissipated if you go in now.”

Fu Ge looked over incredulously; even his voice was very, very soft, “Could it be that in there Sir was… self-harming?”

“It’s nothing out of the ordinary.”

The housekeeper sighed, “There’s no good way to distract yourself from the pain when you’re in extreme distress. Master, he used tableware, pens, broken glass. Later everything in the room was taken away. When he went berserk, he punched the lamp post, the skin on the whole back of his hand was split, blood was dripping down in pools, ah.”

Fu Ge’s heart ached so much that his fingers dug into the pillow, “Sir suffered so much. But he… hasn’t there ever been an Omega he liked?”

The housekeeper gave him a look. Fu Ge turned his head with the tips of his ears red, “Don’t misunderstand, Uncle Gu, I’m not trying to pry, I’m not qualified for this.”

The housekeeper smiled in understanding, “I am not privy to the personal affairs of Master’s family, but even if I were, I guess I wouldn’t be willing to bring it up. Master has always been fierce during his rut period.”

Fu Ge’s smile froze and his heart felt as if it had been stung, “Yes, how could he be willing to torture someone during the rut period if he truly loved that person?”

“That’s not true. It’s because Master gets out of control after entering the rut period and will be mentally disturbed, go crazy and won’t recognise people. That’s why I want to remind Young Master Fu that you must not approach Master at this time, or you will suffer a lot.”

Fu Ge wasn’t too afraid, “Once he enters the rut period, he will go crazy?”

“Well… Nine times out of ten, and a little worse when he’s irritated.”

“Why is this happening?”

“Alas, it’s all the sins he suffered as a child.”

Some images flashed through Fu Ge’s head, and his heart sank.

Although Qi Han’s rut period was painful, the good thing was that it didn’t last long. It would be over in three days at most.

As soon as he left the isolation room, he received a call from the police, saying that some thugs had broken into his house and injured someone.

It was the fastest time for Qi Han to get home, a drive of more than half an hour taking only fifteen minutes. He entered the door and bypassed the police straight away, walking quickly to Uncle Gu and Fu Ge.

“Master, it was my failure to protect Young Master Fu that caused him to be injured—”

“All right.” Qi Han raised his hand and then knelt down on one knee in front of Fu Ge, tucking his long hair behind his ears, “Xiao Ge, how are you?”

Fu Ge’s shoulders shook and he raised his eyes as if waking up from a dream. The moment he saw Qi Han, tears slipped down his face and he threw himself into Qi Han’s arms, eager and aggrieved.

“Sir, you’ve finally come back…”

“Yes, it’s okay.” Qi Han picked him up in a princess hug, and his eyes swept over the murder weapon seized by the police, a long, sharp knife, stained with blood.

He immediately went cold, his face dark and stormy, and he had to take several deep breaths before he could steady his emotions. His mind was full of the scenes of Fu Ge with this knife stuck in his chest, covered in blood.

“President Qi, we haven’t found the suspects yet.” The policeman said, “We still need this young master to assist us in making a statement.”

Fu Ge shrank a little uncomfortably in Qi Han’s arms, “Sir, let me down.”

Qi Han held his legs before he could move, “Stay put.”

“No need for him to go. I will personally bring someone over tomorrow to assist your investigation.”

The policeman was in some difficulty, “You mean to settle it privately? What is President Qi going to do with these suspects?”

Qi Han raised his head, with a ruthless hostile aura of a wolf or a tiger on his face, his superiority unrestrained, “That depends on what they wanted to do to my person when they barged in with a knife.”

He never demonstrated joy or anger, but the words “my person” were said with gritted teeth and a trace of hatred. When Fu Ge heard it, he shrank closer to him.

The police didn’t stay at the villa for long. As soon as Fu Ge’s injuries were treated, Uncle Gu came to tell them that the police had left.

“Okay, let’s go and rest too, you’re frightened.”

Qi Han lowered his head to tie the gauze. His hair was messed up on the way back and was now hanging casually over his forehead. Fu Ge’s eyes never left his face, staring at his deep eyebrows for a while, then wandering over the high bridge of his nose for a while, liking everything he saw.

“Haven’t you seen enough?” Qi Han raised his eyes.

“Sir is very handsome tonight.”

He had said this before, and Qi Han had rebuked him for his flattery, but today he stopped moving and stared at him intently.

“What… What’s wrong?”

“Sleepy?”

Dumbfounded, Fu Ge said, “I’m not sleepy when I’m with you.”

As soon as the words left his mouth, he was pushed onto the bed and Qi Han pulled down his pants.

Fu Ge’s eyes widened and his breath stopped, “You are going to…”

“Do it once.” Qi Han said.

The residual heat of the rut period was still lingering in his body, the fear in his heart was infinitely magnified, and he could only use this tangible way to make sure this person was still safe.

Fu Ge’s eyes turned red, filled with moisture, and he asked in a muffled voice, “Is this alms for me after being frightened?…”

Qi Han picked him up and leaned down with the unrestrained aggression natural to Alpha, “Xiao Ge, it is you who is giving me alms.”

Fu Ge craned his neck to kiss him and nibble on him, offering all his most vulnerable places to him, aching to get wet all over, preferably to the point of spasms.

“Sir…” He licked Qi Han’s Adam’s apple like a cat and said boldly, “Then can I give you alms twice?”

Qi Han let out a ragged gasp, restraining his impulse, “There’s not enough time, it’s one o’clock.”

“But it’s still six hours before dawn.”

“Hmm.” Qi Han sank back, clenched his jaw and let out a deep sigh, “It’s only enough for one time.”

They had longed for this intimacy for far too long.

Fu Ge had begged for it for two months, and Qi Han had waited for it for five years.

He was like a criminal who had been sentenced to a suspended death sentence. There was no gentleness in his movements. He seemed to treat this as the last time, as if expecting to be beheaded in the morning after the night of debauchery.

Beta could not be marked, and he left bite marks anywhere on Fu Ge’s body, on the back of his neck, his wrists, his chest, his sides, the inner sides of his thighs and his ankles.

Fu Ge’s entire body was covered in pheromones and he couldn’t muster a bit of strength in his body. He was in so much pain that he convulsed. He couldn’t hug Qi Han anymore, he passed out a few times and was woken up in the same way, drowning in pleasure and desire to live and to die.

He completely lost his mind at the last moment and couldn’t even breathe, his nails scratching Qi Han’s back deeply, a sharp, thin plea for mercy escaping his throat: “Ah Han… let, let go of me…”

Qi Han suddenly went crazy, his big hands squeezing Fu Ge’s waist, his scarlet eyes plucking into human flesh, “What did you call me? What did you call me?!”

“Sir…” Fu Ge was trembling with pain of his waist squeezed, fainting again in the middle of a desperate cry of “Sir”.

It was five in the morning when he woke up.

Qi Han had just bathed him and put him under the blanket, kissing his insteps lightly, “How are you?”

Fu Ge sniffled and tried to lift his hand to touch Qi Han, but his arm had no strength at all, “I can’t move.”

“Just wake up and you’ll be fine.”

Fu Ge shrank into his arms, his fingers tapping on Qi Han’s Adam’s apple, his voice sticky and enraptured, “Sir was so fierce just now…”

“Didn’t you like it?”

Fu Ge half-squinted his eyes, rubbing against his chin like a kitten, “Won’t say.”

“Sir, won’t you have a cigarette?” He moved down to touch the man’s hand.

Qi Han lowered his eyes to look at him, “Want it?”

“Well… You haven’t given me one in almost a month…”

Dropping a kiss on his brow, Qi Han got up and went to find a cigarette.

He sat on the bed naked, the dim night light illuminating his broad shoulders and back, his tough muscles moving under his skin as he raised his hand to smoke in a way that was full of indescribable sensuality.

Fu Ge couldn’t help it, “Sir, don’t finish it.”

Qi Han smiled, “Don’t worry, you’ll have yours.”

He turned around, kneeling on one knee next to Fu Ge’s head, his hand cupping the cigarette casually. His eyes, hazy in the dim light, wandered inch by inch over the young Beta’s body covered in hickeys. “Where?” he asked.

Fu Ge pointed to the inner side of his thigh, where there was a bright red tooth mark.

But Qi Han hesitated.

He looked at the bite mark, at the cigarette in his hand, and suddenly felt that this was not making Fu Ge happy but creating more sinful debts for himself.

“Let’s try something else,” he said.

Before Fu Ge could react with “huh?”, he saw Qi Han take a deep drag on the cigarette, and then, without even putting it out, press it to his own collarbone.

“No!” Fu Ge shouted, lunging over, “No, no, sir, don’t…”

He desperately grabbed the cigarette, tears falling instantly when he saw the red round burn, “Sir, you… what are you doing…”

Qi Han usually crushed the cigarette with his fingers and then repeatedly shook it to make sure there was only residual heat left before touching him with it, but this time he pressed the cigarette that was still burning to his own skin.

“We need to relieve the pain first, ice pack, I’ll get an ice pack…” Fu Ge was so anxious that he didn’t even dare to touch Qi Han, but Qi Han grabbed his hand and pressed it to his wound, “Does it hurt? Xiao Ge, do you feel pain in your heart?”

Fu Ge cried and nodded, then shook his head helplessly, “Yes… it hurts… It hurts more than a cigarette burn, please don’t do this… You don’t like this…”

It was obviously him who was addicted to pain, and Qi Han would only be physically hurt.

“Will you still love me later?” Qi Han pinched his chin and asked cruelly, “And cooking for me, listening to me read picture books, waiting for me to come home, will you still do these things?”

“Yes, yes, I’ll love you, I will always do it with you…”

“Okay, then it’s a deal.”

Qi Han picked up his phone and showed Fu Ge the audio being recorded, madness and viciousness surging in his crimson eyes, “The copy is kept for archiving. If you fail to do it again this time, gege, I won’t let you go.”

“You said… what?”

“Nothing.” Qi Han smiled again, “Go to sleep.”

The warmth didn’t last long and Qi Han was called away by a phone call just as he lay down.

“I’m sorry, I need to go there right away.” He kissed Fu Ge on the forehead, “Sleep a little longer and eat something light today.”

Fu Ge squinted his eyes and wished him success in his work, but he couldn’t sleep while lying in bed alone.

He got up and walked barefoot to the hanging clothes, took the suit Qi Han had taken off last night and held it in his arms to smell it.

The high quality fabric was smooth and soft to the touch, and Fu Ge rubbed the tip of his nose against it inch by inch, but he came across something hard in the pocket of the coat.

When he took it out, the blood was instantly drained from his body.

It was a navy blue silk ribbon with a prayer wheel and two all-too-familiar men’s diamond rings.

It was the same as in the dream.