Playboy Cultivator in the Apocalypse

In the short time Roxy spent in the bathroom, her situation turned from bad to ugly.

"Major!" Gabriel cried, whipping around his black ponytail ecstatically, "We were just talking about… about missing about… we missed you!"

Roxy blinked twice, staring at the slurring man. "Are you drunk?"

"Yeeeeeeeeeh~ahup!" He proudly raised a rocks glass with brownish liquid, triggering cheers from the others, "The stuff they gave us is incredible!"

An icy chill crawled down the major's spine when she saw all the soldiers were drunk and merry. Not only were the Immortals stronger in terms of raw power, but now they were equal in skill because the alcohol shot her people's motor functions!

"I've only been gone for ten minutes—how are you drunk!?" Roxy yelled angrily, glaring at the Heaven Realm cultivators, "Who the hell trained you people!?

Not only did you drink, but you kept drinking after getting drunk! Getting drunk is physically impossible for a Heaven Realm cultivator! You're clearly drinking poison!"

Jake, Veronica, and Sage glared at her across the table with lethal expressions, prepared to fight if necessary. The tension pumped adrenaline into everyone's bloodstream, slowing time to a crawl as both sides waited for someone to make a move.

"Eyo! Maaaaay~jor, chill out!" Gabriel yelled abruptly, sporting a huge smile as he held a stout bottle of alcohol with amber liquid, "This stuff isn't poison, it's called cognac! It's like… super wine for elites or something. Here, try it!"

His outburst baffled his major into non-aggression, vexed by her trusted associates' idiocy.

"No, I'm not going to drink that." Roxy grinned murderously, speaking through her teeth, "It's one thing for those soldiers to drink, but there's no excuse for you to have when you can't get drunk!"

"I-I know I can't get drunk on wine—it s-sucks." Gabriel hiccuped, "It's like we worked for centuries to get to the Heaven Realm, and then we couldn't celebrate

B-But guess what? This isn't wine! Apparently, if you… hic… take wine and boil it to remove the water, your body can't heal fast enough to keep up with the alcohol. And guess what? It works!"

He lifted his glass to the sky, and the wasted people around him cheered. They were lightweights because it required a lot of wine to get drunk—and Sky Plane wine was exorbitantly expensive. As a result, they quickly got twisted and were having a ball.

"Come on, drink some, Major." A blonde said, her cheeks flushed red, "Just t-try it. It's definitely alcohol, but it's so much better."

"No." Roxy seethed.

"Then at least try one… hic… of these." Gabriel requested, picking up a ham and cheese skewer, "These little shits are delightful."

"No, I'm not going to eat one of those [little shits]." She replied rapidly, gritting her teeth.


"Is it uncustomary to treat guests to alcohol in the Sky Plane?" Veronica asked with glassy eyes, cutting through the emotional confusion.
Roxy froze, feeling the pixie's gaze gripping her heart in a vice and squeezing. She realized that she was acting paranoid, oozing with guilt. "It is between allies; however, we don't accept drinks from people with unknown intentions.

In a diplomatic talk between two people, giving them something that could impair their fighting capability could be interpreted as [provocation]."

She shrewdly deflected the question by accusing them of foul play. It was a common gaslighting tactic that was easy to see through but difficult to counter without a confrontation. By using it, she signaled an ultimatum between dropping the conversation or fighting.

Since conflict was inevitable otherwise, the line gave them an out. Therefore, not only did she deflect the attack, but she also offered a de-escalation. Roxy was clearly not a normal cultivator.

"Is that so?" Veronica mused, sending the woman a haunting smile, "I apologize for not understanding your customs. As for the alcohol, everyone will sober up in ten minutes."

Roxy's eyes glided to the left in confusion. "Why are you so certain of that?"

"Dinner will sober you up." Jake smiled mysteriously, "I'm surprised you haven't noticed."

The brown-haired pixie looked around and found rows of happy, drunken cultivators and maids. However, her eyes widened when she smelled the aroma from the kitchen. "Wait, don't tell me…."

"We're having soul meat for dinner." He announced calmly, "It will help sober everyone up. I doubt it compares to Sky Plane meat; however, it contains water, ice, and shadow elementals."

An eerie silence descended on the room. The cultivators couldn't believe what they had heard, so they turned to their neighbors, whispering for confirmation.

"Is there something… uncustomary about that?" Jake asked in confusion. While he anticipated the gesture proving popular, he didn't expect a dumbfounded reaction.

"U-Uh…." Roxy stuttered in confusion.

"Are you joking?" Gabriel laughed, "Between dignitaries, maybe, but the rest of us? No way! Shit, I'm a Heaven Realm cultivator, and I… hic… rarely see rich people eat the stuff!

The empire heavily regulates it, and eating it without a permit is a crime. Emperor Killian claims it's to 'preserve endangered species.'

B-But that's really… hic… a fancy way of saying [self-preservation]."

An abrupt riot of drunken rambling erupted in the room, replacing the once-eerie silence with a chorus of bickering and resentment.

-

"Preservation—yeah, preserving their species!"

"Right? They won't even let us go monster hunting without a goddamn permit where I'm from."

"Is that all? We can't kill beasts in self defense in my district! Beasts killed my wife's family because they couldn't attack them,"

"Really?"

"I'm dead serious! Lord Young requests to kill all beasts himself, so it takes weeks for beasts to get run out of homes. It's bullshit. I wish we lived under Lord Mitchell. At least she buys the meat."

"Are you joking? Lord Mitchell is worse! She requires everyone to hunt beasts on sight and butcher them to get paid. The time lost and butcher costs put people in the red! We're all certified butchers now because we'll go broke if we aren't."

"Wait, really?"

"Yeah, and if she learns you ate any, she'll personally kill you. I'd take Lord Young any day."

"Oh, you think that's bad? Duke—"

-

"Calm down, everyone!" Roxy cried in panic, "You'll get in trouble for insulting the Lords, let alone the Dukes! Don't forget you're in public!"

"Oh, yeah?" A muscular cultivator with an alcohol-stained toga slurred, "Which spineless motherfuckers are going to rat on their people for gain!? Where are you!?"

He stood up from the table and puffed out his chest.

"Lieutenant Ward!" Roxy roared, angered that her operation was collapsing, "I will discipline you for insubordination if you don't rein yourself in!"

"Oh, so it's you, Major Grace." Lieutenant Ward scoffed, "It seems like we're all going to get in trouble, boys! The major's gonna tattle on us to the Harp!"

A commotion erupted at the table, signaling the start of a dire situation.

Roxy's eyes flashed with murderous intent. However, a calm green light washed over everyone before she could discipline the group, hailing silence. She felt her emotions disappear and her mind clear. "What… wait, them…."

The brown-haired pixie saw the butlers and maids skillfully using Calming Heart on the soldiers, easing the room's anxiety and tension.

Ding!

A chime from a spoon hitting a wine glass rang through the hushed room, drawing all attention to a blonde-haired teen standing at the main table.

"Thank you all for joining us tonight." Jake smiled calmly, "In a moment, Immortals will bring out dozens of mortal seafood dishes that contain two dozen unique elementals.

From what I understand, it's a delicacy in the Sky Plane. However, tonight it's plentiful, so do not hold back. Through partnerships comes power, and at Immortal Skye, there's plenty of power to go around!"

Sage rolled her eyes, scoffing that he was trying to win them over. However, the soldiers had the opposite reaction. Like a spark igniting a flame, his words revitalized their' emotions and triggered a passionate wave of cheering and excitement.

Their contagious rejoicing spread like wildfire, picking up momentum when the cooks wheeled out large dollies with hot fish dishes.

Jake did periodic rounds, ensuring that all the soldiers knew his name, and spoke with the maids and butlers to ensure that food and drink flowed. It seemed like he was always talking to someone, becoming extremely popular amongst the cultivators like he was the Immortals.

Roxy could only watch the scene in horror. Time was running thin, and her soldiers had lost the will and drive to fight against Immortal Skye.

She understood what Jake was doing by his shrewd smile, telling her he knew what she was planning but forced an alternative. While she found it clever and admirable, her plans and intentions didn't matter. If she couldn't find a way to leave without arousing suspicion, his goodwill would be for nothing.