Redo of a Romanceless Author's Life Devoid of Love; Another Chance at Youth

Chapter 248. The Troubling Goth Girl. (3/6)

Having her deepest, darkest secret exposed, her breaths grew disorderly as she panted with anxiety in her eyes.

I had to go this far to ensure I could keep her mouth shut. It was insurance. I got lucky. Very lucky that I’d seen through her clumsy attempt to deceive me.

If she’d kept calm and never made contact with me, I would have never uncovered her secret. I’d only think that she mimicked Alicia’s personality to appeal to the student council president. I would have never actually considered she’d go as far as making herself look like Alicia as well.

It was… sad. Pitiful even. To turn yourself into a cheap carbon copy clone, a replacement for the girl the guy you loved was infatuated with.

She’d done all this because she knew I was aware she was mimicking that girl. She was concerned I’d connect the dots.

It was ironic that her own actions intended to prevent me from connecting the dots were what led me to connect the dots.

“You’re going to reveal everything?” She asked nervously.

“Of course not. As long as you keep what you know to yourself, we can have an equal cooperative relationship. You know my secret, and I know yours. I don’t want to be bothered by other students, so keep this secret of mine, and I’ll keep yours.”

“You’ll really keep my secret?”

“Yes.”

“All I need to do is not reveal anything that happened that day?”

“Yes. Not even if the student council president is the one asking. If you do, he’ll be the first to know about everything you’re trying to keep hidden about yourself.”

I raised my left hand and bushed the side of my thumb over the black heart-shaped tattoo on her neck.

“I’m... starting to question whether you’re really a fake... or authentic.”

“Haha, I am authentic. A true devil, your soul is already mine, remember?”

“A real devil would lie and say they're fake.”

“Maybe I’m using reverse psychology because I believe you would think the opposite.”

“Why would a real devil reveal that they’re using reverse psychology?”

“To keep you guessing of course. The type of answer that drives someone the craziest is the indeterminate one. You feel like it could be one or the other. You have a fifty percent chance of being correct, but that fifty percent chance of being wrong terrifies you. In the end, you’re unable to make a decision because of the unknown. The greatest fear that shackles one’s mind has and always will be that of which is unknown to them. Being wrong could be the difference between life and death.”

“On the off chance I am authentic, the real thing, it would mean I have your soul in my possession. Perhaps you might die if you betray me. But so long as you don’t betray me, you have all the freedom in the world to live as you please.”

“I’m free to live as I please?”

“Yes, you are. Even if how you wish to live is shackled within a prison of your own creation, you are free to do so. I won’t interfere at all. You have the freedom to leave that prison whenever you so desire. All you need to do is open the door yourself and take that step outside to be free.”

I took a step back and headed to the exit.

After I opened the door, I paused for a moment and left her some parting words, “Selling your soul to the devil isn’t enslavement, but rather, acquiring the freedom to live as you please. To no longer be bound by anyone or anything’s expectations of you. Be it society or the world.”

As the door closed behind me, I heard something drop to the ground to my rear. I secretly peeked over my shoulder and confirmed, with her back to the wall, she’d slid down onto the ground as though drained of all strength. She had a hand over her chest heaving up and down.

Had my act been a bit too much? Was she that scared just now? Wasn’t she too much of a scaredy-cat for a girl who dressed in such a fashion?

In this regard, I guess she was a little similar to Alicia who was bad with horror movies despite liking them. She likely uses her outward gothic appearance to hide the side of her that gets easily scared by things.

After our little meeting at lunch, I returned to the classroom. I still had to think of a way to hook her up with the student council president successfully. It was a daunting task.

I thought things over the entire day, but I couldn’t think of anything in the end. There wasn’t any plan I felt confident in. This sort of thing wasn’t my area of expertise. In the end, my best option was to enlist the assistance of another person.

As for who, there was only one person for this job. The person this all revolves around. Alicia.

She was popular and had a plethora of experience in hooking people up. 

When I got home after work with Rosa, I messaged Alicia and asked her to come to my room.

At 9:30 PM there was a knock on my door.

When I opened the door I was greeted by a somewhat fidgety Alicia. She greeted nervously, “Uh… calling me to your room alone at this time… just the two of us…”

“Well, I need your help with something.” I beckoned her into the room.

She stepped inside as I closed the door behind her. She meekly took a seat on my bed with her hands nervously on her lap and asked, “My help? Don’t you think Rosa would be better at helping you with… this sort of thing?”

I blinked once, at first failing to comprehend, when it suddenly clicked in my head what she meant.

“I didn’t call you for... that sort of thing. Just where has the innocent old Alicia I once knew gone to? She’d just blindly come without a second thought while looking like a clueless little lamb.”

“What? It really isn’t for that? So Rosa was wrong?” She looked like she’d been thoroughly convinced it had been for that.

“Rosa?”

“Yeah, when I mentioned it to Rosa, she said I should come prepared to be pushed down on the bed. I told her it was just a simple meeting, but she insisted it was that.”

I facepalmed and said, “Please don’t listen to everything Rosa says. I’m not going to randomly call you to my room for that.”

“What? You... won’t…” she suddenly looked troubled.

“Wait… you don’t mean… you want me to…”

She looked down to the left and said, “I… would prefer if Rosa went first though… it’s... a bit embarrassing.”

How did our conversation head in this direction? This wasn’t good, I had to get back to the original subject I wanted to discuss.

I cleared my throat, took a seat beside her on the bed, and redirected the conversation, “Ehem. Ehem. Anyway… Alicia, the reason I called you is to request your assistance with hooking someone up with the student council president.”

“Huh? That’s what you called me for?”

“Yes.”

“Haaaaaaah. I see. So that’s what this is about.”

“Will you help me? If you aren’t willing to, you don’t have to.”

She tilted her head to the side questioningly, “Should I? Hmm… I don’t have much time lately though… What do I get for helping you?”

“You want… money? I guess that would make sense, paying someone for the services they’re providing. You’re quite busy these days with work after all.” I was a bit caught off guard. I never expected that Alicia of all people would expect something in return, but it made sense why she would want something. Her helping me out with this would take up her precious time which was quite limited as of late.

“Don’t be stupid, I wasn’t asking you for money... I wouldn’t ask my important boyfriend to pay me with money for helping him with something. It’s just that Rosa told me it’s customary when a boyfriend asks their girlfriend for help with something that you get something good in return at the bare minimum. I just wanted to know what that something good was since Rosa wouldn’t tell me what it was.” She pouted dissatisfied and explained when I incorrectly assumed what she wanted.

Damn it, so this was Rosa’s doing again? Always saying unnecessary things. Something good? What the hell do you expect to receive from me? Did Rosa mean something like what we did in the hot tub for her birthday after she helped me with the Angela incident? There’s no way Alicia would ask for something like that though. That being the case… what would a girl like Alicia want?

“Well… Alicia… what would you want for helping me?” I asked with uncertainty in my voice.

“What I want? Anything?”

“Yeah... I’ll do my best to fulfill it so long as it’s something within what is reasonable...”