Re:Zero Kara Hajimeru Isekai Seikatsu

Chapter 4: 68: The Taste of Death

- Subaru was running raggedly through a world where everything seemed distorted.

――――

It's insane.

Insane, insane, insane, insane, insane, insane, insane, insane.

In my head, the words repeat themselves over and over again.

Drawn behind the eyelid repeatedly with words is the last moment of Roswar falling into the fangs of the Great Raven in front of him.

Irresistible, accepting his death so lightly, and without a single voice in the pain of being cut a thousand meat eaten, Roswar ended the existence of himself.

- It's abnormal.

What do you call this without saying it's insane?

If I can achieve my purpose in Parallel World, I don't mind where I am now dead - if this is the game, Subaru may have made the death of a player character mean the same thing.

But it's real.

Reality, how can you deposit your life with someone else, another self?

Roswar, who was eaten by a rabbit in front of Subaru, died. And that Roswar consciousness is not coming back with Subaru to the world where he 'went back to death' and came back.

The point of betting your hopes on 'Back to Death' may be the same as Subaru, but the weight of what you pay to get there is too different in Subaru and Roswar.

Unlike Subaru, who can get it back, Roswar's offer will not come back.

"- Ugh, ku"

While running, Subaru is annoyed by vomiting remembering Roswar's spectacular death.

The feeling of stomach fluids creeping up and burning your throat. The time he was waiting for also ran around sparingly, and Subaru was wandering through the 'sanctuary' in search of survivors.

- Hell is unfolding before Subaru once again.

In the 'sanctuary' where it stopped snowing, there is still a breeze that raises it to become.

If you look around at the pain of sharpening your skin with cold shavings, you can hear the chirping noise coming from the wind.

Chichi, chichichichi, it was ringing short teeth of saw-like blade muscles, surrounding the entire 'sanctuary' with sounds that threatened prey.

The great raven walks safely through the 'sanctuary' in search of prey.

How much is the hunger, hunger that strikes them?

Just because I don't even have time to rest my teeth if I can't find my prey, I'm starving my neighbor's compatriots. It's a broken real monster.

Tight, deafening teeth and the mutilation and pleasure of eating together can be heard hiccups from the surroundings, eroding Subaru's sanity little by little.

"- Wow!

In an attempt to shake off the abominable sound that lingers in his ear, a jaw-opened raven passes over the head of Subaru, who shook his head. I heard fangs and fangs meshing viciously, and a missed prey, a raven flickered over the snow and threatened me.

Shortly afterwards, one of the replicas of the crown, which was side-by-side with Subaru, smashes down his heel directly from the top and crushes the torso of the raven. The flesh chooses and the bone plays, and the rabbit spits out the contents of his little body out of his mouth and despairs.

Exhaled, blinded by the carcass, Subaru resumed his walk. The crown's replica also moves its feet to parallel the running Subaru.

Behind you, a little further away, other ravens arrive under the crushed ravens. The sound of the carcass being eaten in one breath was heard, and the bell of ruin made the sound even higher in Subaru.

There are six more replicas of the crown around Subaru.

Shortly after Roswar was hit by the Great Raven, the number of them, who were up to eleven, is also down to half.

When they were ordered to "protect Subaru," they intercepted the attack of the Great Raven, or stood up and sheltered Subaru, and were restored to Mana.

Subaru has stopped thinking about giving life to a replica.

Now I was just concerned about the safety of the cathedral's Rem and the presence of Emilia, who remains in the cemetery, leaving everything else behind on the other side of the thought.

Because only by doing so is it unlikely that you can affirm your actions now or protect your mind.

"Hey, how about because...!

With feet taken by the snow, while avoiding the dense path of the Great Raven, the 'Sanctuary' is greatly bypassed and Subaru reaches the centre of the settlement, to the cathedral.

In a village without a light source, the cathedral soon caught Subaru's eye.

Naturally.

- Because in the white world, only the cathedral is wrapped in bright red firehands.

- How do you do that?

On his knees on the snow, Subaru groans in a plundering voice.

Mixed with the puffiness and the sound of a burning flame playing building materials, he jumped into the fire to eat the prey in the cathedral, and even saw the Great Rabbit burning down like a feather worm.

Yeah, and the fact that they're making a leap into the cathedral means they have something inside to fill their hunger.

And that's what it means to stay in that flame.

――――

I don't understand your desire to choose to die if you are desperate to survive and end up eaten by a rabbit. It's not like I can't.

"Still, fight to the end..."

Is it too ruthless a word to wish you had fought and not given up on living until the last moment?

Both Roswar and the people of the 'Sanctuary' treat their lives too crudely.

Subaru, who had lost consciousness of his own self-righteousness, covered his face and wept.

Neither Roswar nor Subaru, for the inhabitants of the 'Sanctuary' that sank in despair or for the evacuees of the village of Aram, was there to make them think so, trying to resist to the end and await rescue.

If that was all the trust they could have built, they would have resisted without giving up raw until the last moment. - Again, this was all Subaru's responsibility, Subaru's crime department.

"Rem, just..."

Subaru was too arrogant to put order to the value of his life, whether it wasn't helped or not.

In his head, Subaru calls on Ryus, a representational personality, a replica who gave instructions to take Rem back to the cathedral. but I can't see a noticeable reaction from anywhere thinking I received it.

- Rem is in that flaming cathedral.

Even if he had been able to escape, Subaru hadn't made a head build to congratulate him enough to think that he could escape the Great Rabbit with Lem protected by the crown alone.

Bite your back teeth off. It tastes like blood.

Bite the taste of blood, bite the bitter juice that springs up, and Subaru bites the decision. - I've come this far many times without giving up what I should have figured out that it's no longer a world.

Because this time, really, you're supposed to give up.

――――

I can see that there is an imminent monster imprisoned by hunger paranoia.

From the burning cathedral, the rabbits, who gave up devouring their prey, realized the presence of the knee-breaking Subaru and the replicas that surrounded it.

Standing up, snowing, Subaru exhaled deeply.

Communicating cheeks, I don't notice the feeling of tears. So I don't even wipe that.

"Emilia......"

It's the end of the world.

Even if it didn't end, it's the world that Subaru ends.

A world where I wanted to be together and spend time with people who thought so, who couldn't save one person - at the end of the day, I wanted to be beside my dear girl at least.

"Stand up, protect me. - Once you get to the cemetery, you can be free later."

Speaking emotionally to the six remaining replicas, Subaru took a step, another step, and ran out to escape the herd of great ravens that were shrinking their twist and siege.

Seeing the signs of the escape of the prey, he raises his voice and chases to the footsteps of Subaru as the Great Rabbits covet.

――――

Two replicas slammed a blow into the edge of a flock of giant ravens jumping in.

The sound of meat crushing and the terminal devil pulls tail, and shortly thereafter more than a number of rays flock to the replica.

A replica that in an instant will be covered with white fur and overthrown - shortly after being fatally wounded, its little body will turn into a running stream of blue and white light.

On the last blow to be extinguished, the phosphor rays through the night sky of the 'Sanctuary', accompanied by the great raven on which the explosion of Mana was devouring.

While his skin felt the replica emit its last glow behind him, Subaru shook his head to shake off what he had left behind, eating up his teeth and continuing to run towards the graveyard.

- I kept running.

When we reached the cemetery, Subaru's body was no longer feeling the cold.

Svalbard, who spills white breath from his trembling lips, doesn't admire them, even though he feels his vision snowed and frozen to his eyelashes.

The only dull, heavy thought I could think of was the appearance of one girl.

Make a noise, step on the cobblestone passage, and Subaru goes for the back.

During "The Trial," there should be one girl there, the one who has put her to sleep, waiting for Subaru.

- Subaru?

Shortly after I came across the open space, the sound of a silver bell called Subaru's name.

Turning his legs as the voice invites him, he sees Subaru entering the hall, and the person who was standing up raises his joyful voice.

"After all, Subaru! Where have you been? Don't worry about it."

Running over for a small run as I said, Emilia took Subaru's hand.

The obstinate-faced Emilia held Subaru's hand into her chest, taking it intact, and looked up at this one as she passed on her soft body temperature,

"... Tired?

"Oh... hey, maybe I'm tired... Shin"

"Uh heh, yeah. Bye, bye."

Emilia dyes her cheeks red and laughs at Subaru, which I honestly admit.

And she sat down on the spot on the pretend, holding Subaru's hand. I lay my legs on top of each other and sat sideways, attracting Subaru even more who would be pulled by my hand and mid hips,

"Look, go ahead, Subaru"

"... knee pillow, huh"

"That. Subaru, my knee pillow, you like it, don't you? That's what you said. That's what I remember with you. Hey, come on."

Knock yourself on the knees, follow Emilia, who laughs proudly, and when Subaru also lowers his back on the spot, he puts his head over his soft legs, sweet to the words.

For a moment, her short hair plunders her tender skin and Emilia groans her throat glossy, "Huh," but soon begins to stroke Subaru's head in a way she's used to.

"How many times will this be about Subaru and knee pillows?"

"What do you think... third time, maybe. I feel like I'm worn out."

"This is how I enjoy squirting Subaru's hair and face with my fingers. Here, Uri Uri."

You pull your forehead, you bury your fingers on your cheeks, Subaru, who gets made into a grumpy Emilia but stays.

It conveys that that's her expression of affection, so no shards, such as a willingness to jump her fingers.

A world that's already over - now, I want to drown in Emilia's love.

- Because the contents of my stomach and the blood are long gone.

The state of Subaru now seems so miserable that a normal person would want to turn away.

I bathe my fangs from my back side, and I can probably see my bones if I turn on my clothes. There is a frightening bleeding to go with the devoured femur, and the fingers on your right hand are taken away and all you have left is your thumb when you shake off the flying raven.

Is it the paranoid obsession and the ironic result of the freezing cold that was weakening the body's metabolism that even the hazy consciousness could have reached here? That, too.

"Subaru, a little lighter than before?

"Try a bleeding diet. Like... throw away the weight in a ballast mood and get lighter and lighter, like..."

"I don't know what you're talking about, but you must have been impotent for someone else again, right? That's what Subaru is. I know, but... wow, I'm worried"

…………

"Really, just for me, that's what I want you to do. But that's selfish of me, and I might not want to see Subaru pretending not to look at anyone else for me.... this is selfish of me too, sorry"

Overlapping words quickly, Emilia's voice goes far.

Unlike the cold outside air in the cemetery, temperatures are kept somewhat normal. Ironically, that returns Subaru's metabolism to normal, and the bloodstream that was loose resumes.

The cobblestone-spreading blood stains red and there is also vomiting blood from the mouth of the coughing Subaru.

A bouncing blood spawned a spot on Emilia's white cheek. But...

"Hey, Subaru, are you listening? My cousin, I want to hear a lot, a lot, a lot. Hey, please. Stay on your side. Listen to my voice. Let me hear it, okay?

Emilia is not attentive to the feeling of blood bouncing on her cheeks.

No, I haven't even noticed. The purple blue eyes do look down at Subaru and reflect - but they don't embrace reality as it is.

Upon returning from the mansion, Subaru, tortured and assaulted by Elsa, was scratched. Garfiel would have dragged me to the graveyard and the appearance of the agony would have increased more.

But Emilia didn't notice or even care about Subaru's injuries.

It is now eaten everywhere in the body by the Great Raven, even in front of the missing Subaru everywhere.

Emilia doesn't see reality right now.

And maybe that's the same thing for Subaru.

――――

If it's true, Subaru needs to tell Emilia the crisis and stay away from it.

Already the Great Rabbit has filled the cemetery with the outside, not far away, and will creep in here as well. If that happens, Emilia and I won't have one.

Just as Roswar was, so the villagers chose to die themselves in flames, so too will Emilia be unable to escape from a crippling death.

Even though we know that, Subaru can't tell Emilia that.

In just a few more hours, I can't escape my own genuine desire to welcome my life to be lost - that last hour, beside Emilia.

Roswar's words and spectacular death, the carelessness that had caused Garfiel and Lamb to die, the ineptitude that had lost Petra and Frederica, the helplessness that neither Lem nor Beatrice could save, had defeated Subaru.

Pain, even fear of death, doesn't matter now.

- I just want to disappear from this world now, even.

Subaru's self-serving wish is fulfilled with a throw.

The world begins to cloud and consciousness and soul move away from this place one by one.

Strength falls out of the limbs, and the feeling of the flesh that was almost lost disappears.

All that remains is Emilia, unaware of the Subaru to be lost.

――――

Will I leave Emilia?

In this way, when will you leave even Subaru, who can only rely on Subaru and has lost everything else you can rely on?

"Ahh."

Now, even if you get regrets, everything is slow. Everything is too late.

No voice, anger disappears from my eyes.