Re:Zero Kara Hajimeru Isekai Seikatsu
Chapter Four, 92: Lies.
"It's been a long time since I've exchanged words like this."
"Since you've been around... oh, it's been almost two weeks. The owner looked around with a sad face and didn't want to see it. '
An incredible feeling of words staining directly inside the skull, not the sound of trembling the atmosphere. Nonetheless, the same long idle voice as before can certainly be heard, and Subaru can't help but put his inner indignation into the response.
I was too sure to truthfully receive how to perceive this situation, where frustration prevails, rather than to be happy that I had the expected, or expected, response.
"Apparently, in the two weeks I've been unable to exchange words... you've made me quite angry with you"
'Cause... you know what I mean, right? Don't bother telling me that. "
'Right. Before I stopped going out...... what I said to you in front of that blue-haired girl was too insensitive in retrospect. I thought about it so much. "
…… That's not what I'm talking about!
Well, it's insensitive to dig back into the circumstances that you've already forgotten your anger in Subaru. Besides what we should be talking about and bringing it up in a completely different situation.
Puck responded to Subaru's passion with a stubborn voice: 'Don't be so angry...'
'I know. I just wanted to apologize. If we don't take care of ourselves before we get down to business, we might not be able to step into each other.... but I'm in a position to ask you a lot from now on.'
'Oh well. If your self-satisfaction has been satisfied, let's continue the conversation. That's exactly what you want to talk about. "
Taking the bare gesture of accepting Puck's apology only on the top, Subaru urges him to stay ahead of the story with the crystal stone staring at him.
The transparent gloss bounces Subaru's glare and emits a deep green glow on Emilia's chest.
Subaru pounded his tongue,
'Anyway, there's too much inconvenience in this situation to talk about. In the meantime, come out on the table. I don't even know when Emilia's gonna wake up. Change the place......'
'I'm sorry, but I can't do that. - That's one of the real issues.'
Puck kicks Emilia's suggestion as she looks down at her sleeping face in the words of her thoughts. For a moment in that response, Subaru turned into a face with his nose stuck,
'I don't like it, it's not a rejection word like that. What do you mean, you can't? "
'It means as it is. I'm outside the crystal stone… I mean, I can't materialize into the outside world. Otherwise, there's no way you're gonna leave Leah alone until you're so sad, is there?
――――
Subaru responds with the silence of his thoughts to the voice of a pack that speaks for itself.
Given the numerous events that have taken place so far between Subaru and this Spirit, it is true that there is a sense of doubt, honestly, about how credible his words are.
But whatever the nature of the pack to not reach a step in a pivotal setting, the fundamental part - his presence is for Emilia, and there is no falsehood in how he feels about Emilia. Only in that regard, I also thought that there was no need for suspicion.
So,
"There's something going on, there's a reason... you can't come out there."
'That's right. Thus, I could not even throw words at them with my thoughts. So it was a shame that Subaru found out and called me to the crystal stone. I don't care who else you are, I don't think you could have taken this chance.'
"Anyone else..."
"It's a simple story, because with Leah unconscious, there's only about Subaru who wants to get so close to Leah. Even if you are lucky enough to touch the crystal stone, it is a compatibility issue whether or not the thought makes sense. I tried it in Wangdu before, but I was able to confirm that there would be a path between Subaru and me."
'... Speaking of which, that happened too'
The second King's Capital, when I spoke to Emilia in private there was a similar call of thought between Subaru and the pack as it is now.
It was a reproduction then - even in the sense of a secret story to Emilia, which was a reproduction.
'So, what am I supposed to do?
'Mmm...?
'I went out of my way to gauge when someone would speak to me, and I spoke to him in a godforsaken situation. Such a one-of-a-kind opportunity, you should have been prepared not to miss. With short time and limited opportunities, say the words and tips you need to convey'
――――
To Subaru's words, profound silence. I could think of it as possible for Subaru that the invisible little cat spirit had a human grin when he did it.
Pack laughed in a voice that could not betray the imagination of Subaru like that, and could not hide his joy,
'After all, I was right to expect you. I really can't hide my nagging feelings when I think I have to leave Leah to someone other than myself.'
"... what do you think, shall I tell Emilia from me"
Subaru bows his eyes to the fact that the words of joy have shaded in the second half, with a special winning colour. Then what I suggested to him was just an idea that I didn't know if that would be comforting. but after I said it, it also seemed like a sort of name proposition.
The status quo Emilia has lost sight of the pack that is at the core of her heart's support and is in a state of shaking. Even if it is still bearable now, its body and mind will wear out and expose its weakness by overlapping the passage of time and the setbacks of 'trials'. As long as that happens, I'd better show you one salvation here...
'You should stop. Because if I find out that my words reach someone else, in the worst case, Leah's heart could be broken'
But Puck's sinking voice caught on to Subaru, who was trying to move on with his story on the inside. swallowing the meaning of the word, Subaru exhaled in a real, dry breath, saying, "Yes,"
'What the hell does that... mean?
'It means as it is. Passing on my words to Leah via you means that Leah will know that I am not asleep in the crystal stone. For Leah, who keeps me out and keeps me out of contact with no one, to realize that my mouth is not blocked is an act that could still upset the critical balance of mind'
"Hey, wait a minute -!"
Subaru waits, shaking his neck to the side, to the words of a convoluted pack.
The complexion of the pack does not look Subaru while there is no figure and only the gloss of the crystalline stone is in sight. I just don't see the will to conspire with this one, at least the voice color,
"You know what you just said? That's what you said right now, no other Emilia is keeping you out. '
…………
'What do you mean, I'm sealing your mouth... Emilia called you so much, she was helping you, she said crying... how could you do that! Me and no one else, Emilia will call you by your name when she's exhausted! How could you...!
'... oh well. You regret not being relied upon by Leah first, Subaru.'
"- Huh!!
I am blocked by the kind of words that have been switched arguments and the fact that the meaning of those words correctly captured the core of Subaru by an unclear passion.
It's true that Emilia wants to be the best, and she keeps acting that way. And now it's also true that the fact that Emilia's least is lying around.
It is also true that it is insanely hateful that a being sitting in the best part of that Emilia should have so much more power than Subaru and others, while not acting for Emilia while keeping its very existence itself as Emilia.
That's why the reason for that fact is that it can't be said that the cause is in Emilia, not herself or Pack, not elsewhere, etc., so that she can believe it from her head, etc.
'Well, something. Are you saying that Emilia can try and break the Trial, suffer and rub it off by herself, and smile with tears when she remembers her sad past, all in all, a lying act? - You can't believe that!
If that tear, that voice, that cry, those are all acts to deceive everything around her, then Emilia's acting power is just a gift. She should go for the great actress under heaven rather than for the throne.
If you can trample on and ignore all the obvious facts that Emilia has no such talent or reason to deceive the Subaru people, then you should.
'There's no way... you keep falling for lies around you, but you're crushed with guilt for even a few trivial lies. Emilia is that kind of girl...'
"Subaru, calm down. I'm not saying anything as bad about Leah as your worst imagination. So calm down. '
"Worst imagination...? It's the worst imagination. Hey, don't take the liberty of peeking into my head! That has nothing to do with this. Whatever lies ahead, I'll never take Emilia like that... eh '
"- Natsuki Subaru!
Puck's sharp voice struck Subaru, who was in a state of excitement, as his emotions scratched his mind.
To the strong emotions engulfed in that short call, Subaru, for a moment, trembles his body and stops moving. At the tip of his gaze, as usual, there is no appearance of a kitten, and an inorganic glow just sits quietly on Emilia's chest. However,
Are you calm?
'... you could have voiced that, too. I always thought you were the one moffing around, ignoring the seriousness of things.'
'It's rare, but it's not absurd to have a voice. About Leah and... when I scold a deaf child, I even speak out loud.'
"The Kid Who Doesn't Hear, Kai"
To his relentless words, Subaru spilled a small exhalation.
I can't deny Pack's words because I'm aware that I had some problems with my ugly attitude until just now.
Subaru has not kept calm many times since earlier, even though this is the scene of a long-awaited dialogue. How many times will the pack be tempted and put back into the story?
I feel sorry for my lack of restraint myself. Keep craving to get it, Iron Heart. That one scale is not even in Subaru?
'Most of all, your presence that makes me so emotional about Leah can actually be quite gratifying to me. For Leah, you must be giving me less power.'
"-"
'Cause no one's ever stepped this far inside Leah before. Even Roswar, who took Leah out of the woods in relation to the king's election, does not interfere with the deep part of Leah's heart. I guess what Leah wants is somewhere else about the throne, so naturally.'
- Do you know what Rosewire's purpose is?
"Looking at the Gospel, right? It could be similar to Betty's around here. The position being written and the position not being written. Similar and different, perhaps. '
Position of both Roswar and Beatrice, known to Subaru. Puck apparently knew that in detail from before. I don't think that's the information I'm getting through to Emilia, but I care more about his thoughts that were befitting my own chest about it.
However, Subaru had a thin, imaginary idea of what it would return to inquire about it.
"It's none of Emilia's business, so you didn't take the initiative..."
'I want to do something about Betty if I can do something about it. The Roswar thing...... I need to do something more than involve Leah, cousin'
"You knew that, but you were sending me ahead later."
'I don't even hear a grunt. I don't think it's a good idea to keep you company.'
It should be said that it was strongly influenced by a bad part that did not intend to give priority to anything other than Emilia, regardless of whether it was offensive or not. If that opportunistic stance was what caused Emilia's ordeal today, it was too much fault to laugh off that it was a whispering mistake.
"Rosewar's purpose is now because I'm gonna break it. And about Beatrice... I'm not going to leave it to you. The only thing I'm gonna conspire with you is Emilia."
'That's fine. Neither am I. So far, the power to break it apart from the rear is great. Because if you do your best where you're not meant to be, and you overlook the most important thing, it's the end of the line.'
"Let me hear it. What do you mean Emilia hasn't tried to get you out? I can't believe she's cheating on me or around me. '
Earlier, driven by passion, I roughed up the word, but the idea hasn't changed even with the present. You can't possibly know everything about Emilia's heart, but you still can't possibly think of her as a being who conspires with the people around her and scorns compassion.
To that Subaru thought, the pack has conveyed with thought the feeling of exhalation as if it had gained relief,
'Don't worry, it's hard to say. It's Leah's will not to let me out... but Leah is not trying to keep me out.'
'... sorry, I don't know what you're talking about'
'That's hard to explain. It's all true that Leah is asking me for help, calling on crystal stones, and she's not hearing me. It's true you're trembling without support for fear of being alone. But "
――――
"In the unconscious part, Leah refuses to materialize and communicate with me. Behind the table of minds, I guess I should say I don't agree. '
Subaru is breathtaking at the expression: table and back of the mind.
No way, I wouldn't mean dual personality, but the experience of being betrayed by one's own mind is something I've tasted many times whenever I'm driven into a predicament in Subaru and the world in question.
If there is an Emilia now in a similar situation.
"From you, can't you work for Emilia?
'That's hard. The back part is more coercive than the front part of the mind. I guess that means I'm gonna have trouble with Leah's mind when I'm on the table. "
"Do you have any idea what Emilia's heart is all about? What makes Emilia inconvenient when you come out... '
"You know what, don't you?
It captures Subaru's verbal butt and mixes sounds like a snort in the puck's voice. Subaru was only temporarily silent on the thought of the pack, then laid his eyes down.
- It's just a guess.
'Yeah, I hope so. Let me ask you something. I told you. I'm counting on you, Subaru.
To the foregoing Subaru, the pack gave me a heartbeat that I wasn't happy with at all. Even with such a degree of assurance, I feel somewhat lighter, so that Subaru is held back.
"With you, Emilia..."
"Yeah, yeah."
'I'm going to have to admit something inconvenient about the past I'm looking at. - That's why Emilia unconsciously rejects a situation where you talk to her. "
――――
Subaru's wave of thought, Puck had neither denied nor laughed off, but had taken it in silence.
If the invisible kitten spirit had been on the spot, would he still have rocked that long tail left and right with a relaxed attitude and a long idle face?
'Amazing, Subaru. That's more than I expected. "
After a lot of silence, Puck said so to admire Subaru's words.
Subaru exhaled from his nose into the puck's attitude,
"I'm not at all happy to be complimented, to be honest with you."
'It's an honest compliment. I'm really surprised I could get this far just by guessing, though I wouldn't have had too much information. You know exactly what Leah's heart is. "
The feeling of mercy is great, was the consciousness of the pack looking at sleeping Emilia? Subaru stared at his white sleeping face so that he could follow his voice.
Nightmares and good dreams are both in deep sleep than you can see, Emilia. A 'trial' and accompanying past that diminishes her mind and hunts her down.
However, Subaru was even sceptical about how far that reproduction of the past was' rightly following past facts'.
In fact, the past that Subaru shook off in the "trials" came in the form of a farewell to his father and mother, a symbol of his past regret for Subaru. Naturally, for Subaru's past to shake off is not one big incident, but that environment and the lazy time it took to create it itself.
Therefore "Trials" made a form of time against Subaru that was not meant to be, prompting Subaru to have a peaceful time with his parents, a symbol of regret, and a separation.
"The past does not faithfully embrace the real world. After sucking up the challenged man's mental landscape and various other conditions, we're going to combine it into a suitable form for the 'trials'. '
At the end of the 'trials', Echidna told Subaru the great boundaries of how the 'trials' work. From Svalbard's own memories, he scratched up to the elements Svalbard himself consciously doesn't remember, and said it was the 'exquisite fake world' he shaped on it.
He said his breakup with his parents wasn't real, it was only Subaru's self-satisfaction.
- What's wrong with that, now I think.
"The past I see in the cemetery is a fake pretending to be real. Sexual vices that set up" trials "make it possible for challengers to come up with the most pleasant answers for themselves."
I wasn't saying that much, but I was sure Echidna would. To that extent Subaru also sees the blackness of that witch's intestines.
So,
"The past Emilia is looking at has the right and wrong part. The difference... you know something that will decisively change the past. That's why Emilia is unconscious and refuses to call you in. '
'... I wonder why. With me, Leah can see the right real past. I wonder why Leah would reject me if she knew that.'
"That's..."
Easy, trying to go on, Subaru hesitated to put words ahead.
Why Subaru hesitated, that's the easy part. Mouth ahead means uncovering the truth about Emilia's past. And the cruel, eye-turning time Emilia spoke of - hiding it, that Emilia's heart is hiding the truth.
"The real time Leah wants to forget is more hopeless than the fake time Leah talks about."
Shape the answers Subaru couldn't speak of so that the pack would take over.
I couldn't help but be aware until I put it into words. Conscious of that, Subaru stared at Emilia with sadness.
The people who spent a close, soft time together - Emilia, who was hit with malice and hatred by those people, welcomed a long, long goodbye in the ice, listening to grievances.
That the past, which is going to tear your body and mind apart just thinking, will be a gentle shaking cage for Emilia to cover up the true cruel truth.
"Do you know what Emilia really saw?
'... unfortunately, I don't even know that. I met Leah after Leah got icy in the woods. So I don't know what Leah fears about my existence. I don't know what will determine Leah's past. "
Seriously, the puck groans in remorse, and Subaru bites his lips off at the words.
Emilia's real past - but thanks to it, she can't get past the 'trials', one end of that answer grasped.
Emilia is shown a real past and a different past every time she 'tries'. And Emilia herself wants that fake past to be her own.
'Trials' cannot be crossed unless answers can be given to the real past. As long as Emilia is deceived by her own heart, the past continues to tear her heart apart with a sweet blade.
"What can I do?"
'I don't know'
"I want to help Emilia. I want to help her."
"Same goes for me. I exist only for her. If you can't help her, it doesn't even make sense to exist."
"I want to support him in what he wants to do, and I want to stand next to him."
――――
In front of Subaru, who is about to sue, he pushes silently as the pack contemplates. Subaru just stood still and waited for the Spirit's answer. And Puck, in a seeping voice of determination,
"Subaru. - Only one, it's possible"
"Possibilities...?
'If it's just me, it's the way I never thought about it, and I still have a strong sense of rejection, to be clear. I don't think I would have ever said a suggestion like this, even if I came up with it'
Subaru wonders what he will be told in the words of a pushy pack. At least, it was the first time Subaru had heard Pac's so serious voice in a way other than calling on Emilia.
"What are you gonna do?"
'I'm the one who will. But I'll let you wipe your ass afterwards.'
"... they're going to say something terrible, I'm afraid."
'I never thought I'd ask anyone else to do this. It's just... you're the only one who seemed like he could risk his life for Leah.'
Subaru breathes small into the words of a pack that indulges in something big.
The thoughts Pack felt about Subaru - it's a fact without a doubt. Natsuki Subaru can risk his life for Emilia.
So to Subaru, who shows silence and affirmation, Puck must have nodded in the crystal stone.
Then I said it in a quiet voice.
"Tomorrow morning, I'll let Leah break her contract. - If my relationship with Leah is broken, how can you comfort Leah, who cries? '
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