Savage Divinity

Fingers curled around her porcelain teacup, Sarnai savoured the fragrant aroma and settled in to watch her adorable grandchildren Demonstrate the Forms. How quickly the years passed by, for the twelfth month was now upon them and in a few short weeks, her darling babies would be ten years old and halfway to becoming full adults. As much as she wanted to sit back and enjoy their charming demonstration in the courtyard, they were at the perfect age to set the foundation for the warriors they would inevitably become, so Sarnai hid her smile and watched them both with a critical eye.

Hard at work, sweet Tate wore a focused grimace which made him look oh so adorable as he moved through the Forms with crisp, flowing motions, a textbook performance with minimal flaws, but also without advantage. An impressionable boy, creativity was not his strong suit, too fixated on doing things ‘right’ to allow for improvisation or extrapolation. This mindset could stifle his future growth, because the Forms were merely guidelines, and to reach the peak of Martial Strength, one must forge their own path using tools developed using said guidelines. To this end, Sarnai made a note to bring Tate to watch the spars of more innovative martial warriors in the citadel and give him a wider perspective on how others might interpret the Forms to their advantage.

Beaming prettily with her braids trailing behind her, lovely little Tali was the exact opposite of her twin brother, dancing through the Forms in a relaxed and carefree manner. Despite her poor focus and lack of interest in the Martial Path, Sarnai rated Tali’s performance a notch above Tate’s, for she Demonstrated the Forms with a natural grace and finesse absent from her brother’s movements. Insight came easily to her, but her utter lack of concentration meant she retained little of what she learned. To make matters worse, nervous trepidation would cause sweet Tali’s mindset to shift drastically when placed in a sparring match, rendering her all but helpless before her opponents. Strict discipline alongside confidence building exercises would be needed to help her grow, but while the latter was easily done, Sarnai would sooner die than speak a harsh word to either of her sweet, angelic grandchildren.

As their grandmother, her job was not to discipline, but to spoil the twins. After Alsantset and Charok returned from the front lines, Sarnai would have words with them about disciplining Tali and Tate’s, but in the meantime, perhaps Rain could be her mouthpiece while teaching.

As if terrified by her thoughts, Rain jolted awake from his fitful slumber with a pained gasp, haunted by whatever nightmare had plagued him the night before. Though swaddled in silken covers and behind closed doors, his discomfort was clear as day to Sarnai’s heightened senses and it broke her heart to hear her poor son suffer so. A mere eight weeks had passed since Rain’s shattered Core left him in a world of agony and misery, yet already he had grown accustomed to his plight and only rarely let the pain show, though he did take a spoonful of medicine each morning to blunt the worst of it.

In contrast, seven years had passed since Baatar brought Rain home from the mines, and still he had yet to overcome the trials he faced there, the scars of his ordeals laying deep within his tortured mind. Though she yearned to present him Zhu Chanzui’s head on a platter, killing the bristleboar Ancestral Beast would do nothing to help Rain’s recovery in any meaningful way, or at least, that’s what her dog-brained husband and slow-witted Mentor claimed. While Sarnai mostly agreed, she also thought it couldn’t hurt to try, especially since Zhu Chanzui was confirmed to be working with the Enemy, but both husband and Mentor refused to bring the matter up for discussion because ‘the Treaty must be upheld’.

Pei. What Treaty? It had long since been broken when Zhu Chanzui killed Rain’s Dharma Protector, a man she owed a great deal to, but both sides were all too happy to turn a blind eye out of fear of escalation. Utter nonsense from old Imperial fogeys too afraid to risk their lives in combat. The Empire had abandoned the West and all its citizens over a year ago, which meant any people still left alive were liable to belong to the Enemy, so what harm was there in using the West as a battleground for Divinities?

A sharp hiss caught her attention and Sarnai deduced Rain had pulled a muscle while stretching in bed, but at least he was not longer howling with pain like when his nerves had yet to desensitize. His health had steadily improved in recent weeks, and though she yearned to race over and help or even send servants in to help in her place, more attention would only embarrass him and injure his pride. It didn’t matter that his shattered Core left him exposed and vulnerable to the harsh elements of the world, or how every movement pained his aching, injured body, he still insisted on doing everything by himself, no matter how long it might take. Such was the way of her foolish, arrogant son, a man who valued his privacy and independence more than most and behaved as if asking for help would somehow make him less of a man. Though she often admired his stubborn persistence and unwavering determination, those same qualities almost brought about Rain’s downfall and near Defilement, because instead of going to his family, friends, or his betrotheds for help, he sought to solve all his problems on his own, and being the blind fools that they were, his loved ones failed to see how he suffered, herself included.

Well, no more. Sarnai would see to that. No matter how much he scowled or pouted, she would make certain her son knew he had people ready to help him, no matter the cost.

Though liable to die of embarrassment if he ever found out, she kept a close ear on his actions as he got dressed and readied to send her servants in to rescue him if he hurt himself too badly. Sliding out of bed with a tortured groan, he muttered a steady stream of curses beneath his breath which would make a seasoned sailor blush while changing out of his night-clothes and into the lovely blue and white outfit she’d laid out for him. A necessary imposition, because despite his many talents, her son lacked an eye for fashion and good taste, throwing on whatever clothes were readily available if left to his own devices, sometimes even the same clothes he’d worn the day before. Not so terrible a crime for a Martial Warrior, but without Chi to cleanse his physical form, a whole host of new issues had cropped up, including a somewhat unpleasant body odour.

Originally, Rain dealt with his shortcomings by having a wardrobe filled with identical black outfits, but the dreary colours made him look more pallid and sickly than he already was, and these days, wearing anything less than fine silk would chafe his skin until red and raw, yet another downside of his new condition. All of this should have been handled by his wives, but Mila and Yan had run off to the battlefield while little Lin had more than enough on her plate to deal with. A shame that Zheng Luo girl was such a disappointment. She seemed so promising at first glance, but lately she’d thrown herself into her work and martial training instead of taking proper care of her Lord Husband. Sarnai had brought the matter up with Rain, but he was happy to leave things as they were, none too enamoured by the towering, busty, beauty with the wonderfully wide birthing hips. What a waste...

Sarnai’s tea had long since grown cold by the time Rain shuffled out of his room, keeping to the shadows in his thick overcoat and smelling of sweet herbs and sour sweat. The dark circles under his eyes no less prominent after a full night’s rest, but his smile was bright and cheery as he made his way over with help from his ‘walker’, a four-legged cane he designed himself which included a plank to sit on and a basket to hold things like water gourds and Blackjack. The simple device proved his mind was as sharp as ever despite his slowed speech and poor reflexes, a small blessing which she gave thanks for every day. Lips chapped to the point of cracking, Rain gave her a light kiss on the cheek and said, “Morning Mom.”

“Good morning, sweet child.” Carefully smoothing out his oily hair after he sat down beside her beneath the awning’s shade, she handed him a small jar of unguent for his lips, prepared and delivered by Lin after dinner last night. “Spread this on your lips before they split.” Something needed to be done about his skin too, because not only would it burn and redden if exposed to the sun, it seemed like he woke up with a new pimple every day and could never resist popping it. Incredible how far the Mother’s protections went, and though the differences were faint and barely noticeable at first, having lost those protections only accentuated how far Rain had fallen in so short a time.

To think, he’d been crowned the Number One Talent in the Empire only a mere nine months ago...

After doing as he was told, Rain frowned at her lack of outerwear and turned to a nearby servant. “Could you bring a warm cloak for my mother, please?”

Rolling her eyes, Sarnai accepted his kind intentions despite not needing more layers, as her warm, woollen robes were more than enough to guard against Central’s mild winters. Though cold enough to see her breath, only a small layer of frost sat atop the green grass of her courtyard, one which would melt away at the touch of the mid-afternoon sun. While she considered this weather comfortably brisk, Rain was already shivering from head to toe despite his many layers, yet another subtle sign of his infirmity. Time was, he would be fine with a light cotton shirt in weather such as this, even stripping bare to let his sweat turn to steam as he went through the Movements, but no more. Now, he was so weak he could barely lift a chair off the ground much less Demonstrate the Forms, his body still yet to adapt to his new, Chi-less existence. A stiff breeze could knock him over and break his brittle bones, and Taduk warned Rain’s heart could give out if overexerted, weaker and more fragile than even the basest of commoners.

Physically, there was nothing wrong with Rain’s body aside from a lack of fat and muscle mass, all of which had been used up over weeks of Healing, but Spiritually, he was crippled and with little hope of recovery according every Healer except Taduk. Not much was known about his ailment, for Martial Warriors rarely survived the destruction of their Spiritual Weapons and those who did were soon-after ignored and forgotten, but in short, Rain’s broken Core was no longer capable of holding Chi and his Spiritual self laid in tatters. Had this only left him a mere commoner, the situation would not be so dire, but a broken Spiritual self was far more disastrous than anyone expected. Rain and Taduk theorized that everyone, even children and peasants who never formed a Core, possessed a Spiritual self, a circulatory system for Chi or Heavenly Energy as it were. Thus, every person beneath the sun drew some measure of strength from the Heavens, protecting them ever so slightly from the harsh conditions of the world around them. Rain claimed it was an innate, instinctual usage of Heavenly Energy to survive where ‘normal’ humans like himself would otherwise perish, granting them small advantages like resistance from the elements, increased stamina and toughness, or other such boons which went unrecognized because everyone possessed them.

He kept trying to explain it using teeth, but everyone’s teeth naturally grew back...

Though not entirely convinced this was the case at first, seeing the pain her son went through merely to greet his pets was ample enough persuasion. Though Aurie’s thick fur felt soft and luxurious to her touch, Rain had screamed in agony the first time he stroked the sweet wildcat’s head the wrong way and the long hairs pierced through his tender skin. The same happened with the birds, bears, and quins, a distressing plight which drove her animal-loving son into the depths of despair until he found out his long-eared pets were still safe to cuddle, though he had to be careful of their nubby horns and digging claws. This was only the most obvious example of Rain’s newfangled fragility, though it didn’t stop him from letting the animals onto his bed. Sarnai only put an end to it after noticing how much coin he wasted on new silken sheets to replace the torn or bloodied ones, but no amount of pain would keep him from cuddling his pets.

“Hello Aurie,” he cooed, smoothing out the wildcat’s whiskers for a kiss. “Did you have a good night’s sleep with Mom? Mean old Dad didn’t kick you out of bed again, did he? Naughty old man to treat his grandchildren so...”

“Tch. Speak no more of this.” Cheeks heating at Rain’s teasing tone, Sarnai squashed the urge to rap him gently on the head, knowing it would hurt him far more than she intended. Even as she watched him smile and greet Blackjack, Mama Bun, Jimjam, and Banjo, she was reminded of all the pain and suffering he’d gone through after the battle in Sinuji. The week-long ride to the citadel had been torturous for him as his skin peeled and blistered from exposure to the sun while sobbing about how the cold air felt like shards of broken glass rubbing across his face. Gaunt and skeletal from repeated Healing, he exacerbated his condition by eating less than a half-bowl of rice at every meal, presumably due to poor appetite, but Sarnai suspected it was because chewing pained him too much. He ate more after she switched him onto a diet of soup and congee, but his recovery would be slow and arduous at best, especially with him taking new injuries with each passing day.

For the first few weeks, she’d held out hope he would recreate whatever miracle which let him wield Water Chi with ease and quickly return to the battlefield in glorious triumph, but the Mother was not so kind. Impressive as it had been, Rain remembered nothing of his powerful display on the fields of Sinuji, but Sarnai remembered it well. She had nearly gone mad with rage when she looked through the smoke and steam and discovered her son was little more than a burnt husk of a man, with patches of tender, freshly Healed flesh poking through his charred frame. In this near death state, he demonstrated a level of mastery few living could match, and while she didn’t know it at the time, Sarnai and everyone else in Sinuji were witness to a spent flame flaring up one last time before fading into nothingness, for it wasn’t Elemental Chi Rain wielded, but rather the Energy of the Heavens itself. Injured and unconscious, Rain had instinctively used the Heavenly Energy he’d collected from cleansed Spectres to keep himself alive and fight off his quasi-demonic foe, a fact which brought him to tears as he apologized for ‘wasting’ the precious resource and being unable to Heal Sarnai of her affliction.

Her poor, sweet, selfless son, crippled and broken but still thinking of how he failed to help his mother. It made Sarnai’s guilt that much worse as she held his hand and cried, for she blamed herself for his plight. Oh how she wished she had given him more support and dispatched a half-dozen Peak Experts to guard him in secret instead of leaving his fate to Jochi and Argat, while Dagen and a few others lurked in the shadows. She had half a mind to lambaste all of those idiots for letting Rain get into so much trouble, but truth be told, this was her fault. She knew how headstrong and impulsive he could be, but it wasn’t just about letting him go off to fight without adequate protection or supervision, but even letting him out to fight at all. Had she known of his internalized suffering, she would have never let him out of her sight until long after he was married and settled down. In the weeks since Sinuji, he told them everything about what he’d been through in the past few years and how it affected him, about how he’d developed a second personality to foist all his failings upon and then nearly succumbed to the stress of battle and responsibility.

‘Leave him be,” her dog-brained husband had said so many times before. ‘He is strong and will endure.’ True, but strong though Rain might be, he was still just a child and even now barely a man grown. Sarnai should have ignored her stupid husband and forced Rain’s secrets out of him, for though he claimed he was whole once more, who could say for certain? Even if true, this meant her son had suffered and overcome his trials and tribulations without his family even noticing, an unforgivable failure on her part. She was his mother, not by birth, but by choice, and as such, she was responsible for his happiness and well-being. Instead, it’d taken a veritable stranger to see how her sweet son suffered so, and she couldn’t even thank their benefactor because he’d already passed away, protecting Rain as she should have.

Sarnai had failed Rain as his mother, an unforgivable offence.

“It’s okay mom,” Rain said, reaching out to take her hand, and only then did Sarnai notice she was crying. “It’s not your fault.”

“Isn’t it though?” she asked, her voice breaking as she pulled him close for a hug, afraid to hold him too tightly for fear of hurting him. “I should have kept you safe. I could have kept this from happening.”

“You’re saying you should have foreseen my hated nemesis would challenge me to a duel and let me stab him before turning into a quasi-Demon?” While they all knew there was more to it, they’d agreed not to speak of it except through Sending, and Rain could no longer Send. Chuckling in contentment, Rain shook his head and said, “There’s nothing you could’ve done to stop this, and if I could go back in time and do it over again, the only thing I would do differently is go for the head.” Snorting with laughter, he changed the subject and nodded at Baloo, who sat with eyes wide and teary since his greeting had been interrupted, the only pet here who had yet to receive a kiss. “Someone’s jealous.”

Wiping the tears from her eyes, Sarnai gestured for Baloo to clamber onto her lap and cuddled the sweet bear close, his happy grunts and chortles a delight to behold. The other animals sought to join in, and soon mother and son were both laughing at the animals’ childish antics, all pushing and shoving for their share of affection. Putting on a pair of bristled gloves, Rain hummed a happy little tune while brushing his pets and waiting for the twins to finish up. Truth be told, despite his debilitating weakness and frailty, he seemed happier now than he had in several years, finally able to relax and recuperate instead of pushing himself to become stronger each and every day. Even back in the village, she couldn’t remember seeing him smile so much, his mood bright and spirits high despite his circumstances. While she wouldn’t go as far as to call this a blessing in disguise, this was a much needed break for Rain to spend his blissful days with his family and pets, so Sarnai was content to share his joy and be there for him if he should need her.

Once the twins finished their Demonstration, it was time to go collect Lin and Li Song for a lunch outing. Refusing the offer of a palanquin, Rain opted to walk instead, and though it was only a short distance away, Sarnai feared it would be too much. Not just physically, but emotionally as well, for there were plenty of layabouts loitering about outside their courtyard manor, hoping to catch a glimpse of the crippled Falling Rain. Not three months ago, he’d shocked the Empire by Developing a Domain and displaying Peak Expert levels of power, but already the nobility were camping outside his doors to mock and deride him, chatting loudly about how he was no longer the Mother’s Chosen son or even worthy of admiration after falling so low. ‘The Crippled Consort’, they called him to avoid mentioning him directly, or ‘Fallen Rain’ if they thought they were being clever, but were it not for her husband’s rank and reputation, Sarnai would have wasted every one of those pompous buffoons and left these Imperial fools to fend for themselves.

“Don’t worry about what others say or think, Mom,” he said, patting her hand as they readied to step out the double doors together with their matching walkers, though she lacked the cloud chaser hare perched atop her head. “Walking will help build our strength, so don’t let a bunch of nobodies keep us from getting better. Let them laugh and joke all they want, because with every day, we grow stronger and healthier.” Amber eyes burning with ambition, Rain smiled as if he knew something she didn’t and added, “We will not be weak forever.”

Pride welling in her chest, Sarnai squeezed his hand and smiled. “Of course not. This is merely a minor setback in the ‘Saga of Falling Rain’.”

Groaning in mock disgust, Rain pleaded for mercy. “Please don’t bring that up again. I still can’t believe BoShui thought it was a good idea to distribute his flowery write up. I almost threw up reading it.”

In truth, Sarnai loved BoShui’s rendition of events and had several copies hidden about her room since Rain had taken to burning every copy he got his hands on. Regardless of his amateur writing, BoShui certainly got one thing right. Rain had survived, broken but undefeated, and he would soon rise again.

This she believed with all her heart, because if anyone could do it, it would be her son, Falling Rain.

Chapter Meme