Self Insert as Spider-Man MCU

Bokuboy

I showed up at the training room all ready for my next lesson and I was surprised when I wasn't the only one in the room. Both Clint and Natasha were there, as were four other agents. There were two women and two men, three of which I didn't know. However, there was one man that I did recognize. He was a double agent that worked for both SHIELD and Hydra named Grant Ward.

I didn't let my recognition show as I examined the rest of the people with my eyes, and they seemed to just be standing around. Seemed was the key word, because Grant stood a little closer to a woman than he did anyone else and Clint and Natasha were also closer than casual standing would account for.

Of course, I was the only one in workout gear and stood out like a fresh pimple on a supermodel's nose, because everyone else wore the nice dark blue day shift uniforms of SHIELD field agents.

“This is why you should have briefed me properly, Hawkeye. It would have saved you some embarrassment from having your student show up completely unprepared.” I said and stayed where I was by the door instead of joining any of the others. I had even left my gym bag back in my office, so none of my official equipment was available. On the plus side, I did have my four cell phones on me.

Clint looked surprised at my words and a couple of the agents looked like they understood that I had just pawned off my state of unreadiness as his responsibility.

“I will discuss his lack of informing you at the next staff meeting.” Maria said as she entered the room.

“It's not the first time he's done it.” I said and nodded to Natasha. “I think a bit of hazing for the new guy had been planned, even though this is my first official mission.” I said and smiled a little at Maria. “Assuming this actually is an assigned mission for a new recruit.”

Maria's eyes narrowed slightly. “It has been planned for two weeks and both Black Widow and Hawkeye knew about you being assigned.”

Natasha let out a slight sigh. “I was going to assess his viability for the mission before deployment, except the timetable moved up by two hours and I was unable to.”

“You just admitted you intentionally kept him in the dark about his first assignment.” Maria said and the look in her eyes seemed to hold Natasha in place. “I could have ignored you forgetting to inform Agent Parker, if it had been a mistake.”

Natasha opened her mouth to speak, paused, then spoke. “I don't have an excuse.”

Probably because she was being petty and doesn't want to admit it. I thought. My knowing about her past must have really bothered her.

Maria turned to me. “There is no time for you to get kitted out properly. We have spare gear on the transport that you can use and will have to live with the backup uniforms not fitting you properly.”

“Understood. I won't let it hinder me, Deputy Director Hill.” I said with confidence. “You can count on me.”

Maria's lips twitched as if to smile and her face went back to her stoic look as she nodded. “All right, people. Listen up.” She said and walked across the room and tapped some hidden controls on the wall and it opened to reveal a large monitor and it displayed a large compound. “You will be divided up into two man teams and...”

I did not miss the fact that there were seven of us as I listened to the briefing with one ear and let my eyes roam around the room. Natasha had her face stiff, as if she had a hard time not letting any emotions show, and Clint was beside her and his face wasn't much better off. I was sure the chewing out they were going to get for keeping me out of the loop, was going to be difficult for them to accept, because they deserved it and they knew they did.

I had a sympathetic look from one of the women and one of the men, while a look of ambivalence came from both Grant and the woman beside him. That meant the latter two didn't care that one of their teammates was about to go with them into a mission and had not been prepared for it.

“...and after the tech team successfully hacks into the security network, they can shut off the movement sensors and the cameras that our initial probes revealed.” Maria Hill said.

I put up my hand and she gave me a questioning look. “Why don't you just have Black Widow use one of her taser shots to run an overloading electrical current into the security grid?”

Nearly everyone gave me a surprised look.

“If you're close enough to have the tech team strip wires to make a physical connection to gain access, just blow the whole system instead of trying to hack it and do it the long way.” I added. “It's the same result in about a tenth of the time.”

“We are trying to be stealthy about the mission.” One of the men said.

“That's not possible. If you're cutting the feed to the external security just to get inside, someone is going to notice.” I said and smiled as I realized what would happen. “If they have someone sitting there watching the monitors, the base alarm will be tripped within ten seconds when it all goes down. If it's unmanned, then it won't matter how the security grid is taken out.”

That had the other agents thinking about it.

Maria wasn't thinking about it as she looked right at me. “Agent Parker? You have an alternative?”

“That depends. What is the final objective of the mission?” I asked.

“The destruction of the weapons caches and the main drug manufacturing facilities.” Maria said. “Our cover story will be a wildfire had engulfed the place and destroyed everything.”

“Will you be issuing explosives to all of the team members?” I asked.

“No, only to certain members that have been trained in their operational safety.” Maria responded.

“Experienced field agents, then.” I said and thought about it. “What about grenades? Incendiary, smoke, and fragment?”

“Same answer.” Maria said and her eyes went to Natasha and Clint.

“It's not their fault. Widow showed me a wide range of weapons my first day here during my assessment. We didn't get to grenades, since they are not a part of the necessary information needed for normal agents. Hawkeye on the other hand, has been showing me how much my body hates bruises as I learned how to fight properly.”

The two men chuckled and the women nodded.

Maria waited for a moment and spoke. “I ask you again, Agent Parker. Do you have an alternative?”

I looked at the display and let my eyes take everything in. I looked at it like I was going to throw a basketball at a hoop and let my mind fill in the equations and the variables for distance and the amount of force required to get into the base and score. I walked over to the display and stared at it.

“Can you rotate this?” I asked and motioned to it.

Maria used the controls to change the top-down view and it rotated to the right, then the right again.

“Stop.” I said and reached out and tapped a small building with my finger. “A lot of the wires are going to here. Any chance for a quick air strike?”

“No, we really are trying to be covert.” Maria said. “That also means no overflights.”

I looked back at it and let my mind throw balls at the compound and played out where they would land. Do I use a deflection and bounce off the backboard or go for a swish and do nothing but net?

“Where is our insertion site in comparison to the target?” I asked and Maria zoomed out and a red dot appeared several miles away. “I can work with that.”

“Excuse me?” One of the women asked and I wasn't surprised it was the one near Grant.

“It's out far enough that I can swing around on my own. I can gain entrance to the base much easier as a sole person and not part of a two man team.” I said, which pointed out the mismatched number of us going. I tapped the small building with my fingertip. “The monitoring shack looks unguarded. I'll copy and run the previous footage on a loop and no one will know anything is happening, even after the rest of you assault the compound with the motion sensors off.”

Grant actually made a huff sound. “You're as bad as those two and you haven't been on a mission yet.”

Everyone knew he was talking about Natasha and Clint.

“They are your backup.” Maria said and everyone looked surprised, except for me. “Agent Parker?”

“Hmm?” I said and smiled at her questioning look. “Oh, I figured they were only going to help when needed or if we get into trouble. If they were doing the mission themselves, we wouldn't be needed at all.”

Natasha and Clint exchanged knowing looks.

“If you're worried that what I suggest doesn't work, it doesn't really affect the normal plan you already have, since I'm an extra man anyway. You can still attack, disable the security, and destroy the place. If I'm caught, I'll be the perfect distraction.” I said and my teammates all looked surprised. It sure did take a lot to get others to notice the obvious.

Maria gave me an odd look, one that was both contemplative and full of assessment. “I approve of the modification.”

“WHAT?!?” Several of the other agents exclaimed, while both Clint and Natasha looked shocked.

Maria ignored them and looked into my eyes. “We are trusting you to successfully infiltrate and signal your teammates. If you are caught, you will be on your own. A rescue mission has not been approved.” She said and looked at the others. “For any of you.”

“You're not even going to tell us what country we're going to, are you?” The unnamed man asked.

“That's not necessary for the mission to succeed.” I said before Maria could and she gave me a slight nod. “Wherever it is, it's definitely a rush job, so we need to go.”

“Hey, aren't you going to ask why we're doing this?” One of the women asked me.

“No, I make it a habit to not ask superior officers stupid questions.” I said and she looked surprised. “It could be a local warlord that wants the territory, or the president of the country is a dictator getting kickbacks from the drugs, or it could be the neighbouring country wants to destabilize their economy and remove a bad influence and the source of their power.”

Everyone stared at me, even Maria.

“Those are just guesses, though. It doesn't matter in the end, because it's getting blown up. We're agents. It's not our job to worry about the political, economic, or societal impact of things like this.” I said and that really made them stare hard at me, so I shrugged and started walking across the room to the door. “We're wasting daylight and we need to go. I also need to change.”

“Basement exit in the east wing.” Maria said behind me. “Black Widow, Hawkeye, lead the way.”

I stopped at the door and waited for them, because I didn't know where the basement exit was. Natasha gave me a pointed look as she passed. I winked at her and she squinted her eyes at me. She didn't say anything, though.

I followed behind her and ignored everyone else as I took out my cell phone and sent Aunt May a text about working late and that I might have to pull an all-nighter, because a huge data package had just been delivered and it surprised the whole department.

May wasn't happy about me staying out all night and I assured her that I and my six associates would be well taken care of by the agency. She reluctantly agreed and I sent her a heart emoji and put my phone away. With the most important thing done, I stared at Natasha's ass in her Black Widow costume as she walked ahead of me.

I remembered plowing into her from behind, watched as her ass jiggled, and enjoyed the feeling as my balls smacked hard into her soaked womanhood at the same time. Penis Parker could not ignore the memory and made a pronounced appearance. Since I was wearing tight workout clothes, there was no way I was hiding my erection from anyone, so I didn't bother to try.

We arrived at the exit and gathered around the back of the large van that was similar to the one I had rented. The women in the group, Natasha included, easily noticed my ready state.

“Are you that excited about going on your first mission?” One of the women asked and didn't hide the fact that she had checked me out. Thankfully, it was not the potential Hydra agent.

“I am.” I said and didn't explain about my thoughts of drilling Natasha or that it wasn't going to go away while being held by the now much tighter fabric. I did give Natasha a glance and flicked my eyes down to her waist and back to her face. I thought I saw a slight smile before she used her blank face again.

The van's rear door was opened by Clint and we all entered the back and sat down on the jumpseats on the sides, four to a side. We didn't bother strapping in. Clint closed the back and the van was soon driving across part of the city. I suspected we went towards the docks, because we went up a small incline and came to a stop.

I felt the slight swell and shallow of a boat in the water and I thought it was neat that my sense of balance had easily detected the change from solid ground to water, even though we were probably inside the Helicarrier that was larger than a full sized aircraft carrier.

Clint opened the back of the van and we filed out and went right into the back of a Quinjet. “Strap in until we take off. No talking.” He advised us and walked past us as Natasha closed the boarding ramp. She gave me a blank look and then followed Clint into the cockpit.

The transport was fairly large and we didn't have to sit directly beside each other, so it was interesting when everyone spread out and sat with the people they knew. I sat beside the door, Grant and his woman sat together several seats away from me and the other woman and the man, whom I assumed was her partner, sat together on the other side of the compartment.

We all strapped in and the transport powered up. I listened and nodded my head slightly as all five fans made the proper whirring sounds as the test from the lab that morning. There was no stuttering from one of them, which meant this transport would not potentially crash. It was a relief and it must have shown on my face.

“Are you scared of heights or something?” The woman across the compartment asked.

I raised my eyebrows at her and nodded towards the cockpit.

“He didn't mean it. There's no way that us speaking back here can cause something to go wrong.” She said, a little smugly.

Clint came back into the personnel hold and gave her a good stare. “I wanted quiet so I can talk to the flight tower and receive instructions without interruption or having to listen to two people talking at the same time.”

The woman's face lost some of its color. “Y-yes, sir. I'm sorry, sir.”

Clint nodded and looked at me. “Agent Parker, we will be at a stable flight height in ten minutes. The gear locker is at the front of the compartment on the right hand side. Your thumb print will open it.”

“Understood, sir.” I said with a nod. He had just told me that there were no personal change rooms and if I wanted to gear up, it would be in front of four other people that I didn't know. “What's our ETA?”

“That's classified.” Clint said and walked back across the compartment and went back into the cockpit.

No one else spoke, even though we could now.

*

Clint closed the hatch to the back and sat down in the co-pilot's seat. He didn't say a word as the Quinjet rose up to international flight height. When the plane levelled off, he stayed quiet and looked at Natasha with a blank face.

For half an hour, Natasha successfully ignored Clint's silent pleas to tell him what was going on, before she gave in and turned on the autopilot to give him the same blank look back.

Ten minutes later, Natasha had to turn away. She didn't say anything, even though she wanted to. She wanted to tell Clint how conflicted she was about Ben, about Ben knowing about her past, about her not knowing Ben's, about how she desperately wanted to have sex with Ben again, and how compromised she felt because of it all.

“Are you going to kill him?” Clint asked.

Natasha didn't respond and sat there as she stared out the cockpit window. It would be so much easier if she could solve her problems that way. One stray bullet to the head, blamed on an enemy ambush, and all of her worries and anxieties would disappear.

She could easily follow Ben through the miles of forest and she could remove the threat, then she would complete his assignment for him and leave his body to be disposed of in the staged wildfire. It was such an appealing solution that she seriously contemplated it. She worked out the details, the factual reports she would file, and the evidence she would have if the setup was done properly.

Fuck. Clint thought as he easily read the thoughts on his long time friend's face. I need to say something to stop her before she makes a huge mistake. He opened his mouth to speak and Natasha interrupted him.

“If he screws up any part of this mission or gets caught, I'll deal with him.” Natasha said, adamantly.

Clint clamped his mouth shut because he had been too slow and had let her reach the decision on her own. Fuck, fuck, fuck. He thought. Fury will have her erased if she does something stupid like that.

He sat back in the co-pilot's chair and thought about following Natasha when she followed Ben, then cursed in his head again, because he had to babysit the other agents instead. He decided to put a GPS tracker on Ben and would follow him electronically instead.