Semantic Error

Sangwoo didn’t have a concept of things such as taste. It was just that the sense of comfort he felt everyday put him into a nostalgic mood. Sangwoo ignored Jaeyoung and began to walk in the direction of the liberal arts college, perhaps in hope of recovering his lost daily routine.

There was still a sign saying “The theater department is shooting here” on the path he usually took. He had been tricked by that sign for three days, but he knew the truth now. Sangwoo kicked the sign, and put it in the trash can after breaking it.

Peace found him as he was walking along his lost path, despite Jaeyoung being next to him. Sangwoo sipped on his canned coffee and even walked with his eyes closed.

“Aren’t you being too daring?”

Sangwoo walked a bit faster as he didn’t want to be disturbed. Then, Jaeyoung sped up and chased after him as if it were the most natural thing to do.

 

“Even when you know what I’ll do when it’s just the two of us here alone.”

“Are you a fucking thug?”

“…look at the way you talk.”

“If you’re not a thug, it shouldn’t matter. I just asked if you were a thug. Did it hit home?”

“It’ll take time for your favorite 112 to dispatch. Let’s be careful,” Jaeyoung said while clenching his teeth.

Sangwoo looked at Jaeyoung with a sneer. Even if he was handsomely tall, the coat he wore gave off a vibe of not being able to fight, especially not being skilled at martial arts.

“I don’t think you’re very good at fighting, sunbae.”

“Oh, really? You must be working out?”

Sangwoo practiced Taekwondo for a long time, but studying had been his priority since high school. These days, he didn’t do any other exercise at home apart from stretching his arms or riding his bicycle to and from school.

“I used to exercise a bit before. I rarely do it these days.”

“Play basketball with hyung next time. I won’t let you touch the ball.”

“I don’t want to. And please stop adding family members to others.1”

There was an almost fully-constructed futsal field at the end of the path. Sangwoo naturally walked to the front of the Natural Science College and stood to throw away the can. The can arced through the air and neatly landed in the second of the three trash cans. He felt relieved. Step-by-step, he felt like he was rebuilding the card tower someone had blown up.

The library was next. Sangwoo sat down in the seat he had reserved in advance, and Jaeyoung sat down right next to it. This time, he didn’t borrow any books, and just simply took out a pen. While Sangwoo took out the textbooks for his major and hung his backpack on the back of the chair, Jaeyoung grabbed his notebook.

“Give it back. It’s theft.”

Jaeyoung rolled his eyes as if he were annoyed, flipped the notebook over, and glanced at its back cover. After checking the price tag, he took out a leather wallet from his pocket, and put two 1,000 won bills on Sangwoo’s desk. Sangwoo was at a loss for words. He would’ve reported it if it were an important notebook, but he only used it to practice his material. Rather than wasting his time quarreling with Jaeyoung, he simply grabbed another notebook of the same design from his bag.

 

And then the interference began again. Sangwoo was half-waiting, as he was anticipating the sound of flipping pages. Sangwoo grabbed his earplugs, the third bullet he’d prepared, from his backpack, and plugged them into his ears so he couldn’t hear any annoying sounds. Jihye’s other two pieces of advice had gone up in smoke, but the third one was effective.

The earplugs made him feel trapped and uncomfortable, but the positives outweighed the negatives as all noise was effectively blocked. He had a feeling that he would be able to concentrate and study well for the first time in a while. But, before he could even read a single paragraph, he felt a gaze fall upon his cheeks.

When he looked to his right, Jaeyoung had completely turned his body to that side, and was drawing something in the notebook. He had a rather professional posture and expression on his face, and was alternating between looking at Sangwoo and the notebook, while quickly moving his pen.

‘He’s impossible.’ 

Sangwoo grabbed his divider, put it up on his right side, and turned his head back to his book. He was startled so he looked to his side a minute later and noticed that the divider had been noiselessly lowered. He hadn’t heard it because of the earplugs. Jaeyoung pulled it down when Sangwoo erected it again. After repeating this three times, Sangwoo got angry. He had thought he would have been able to study today at least, but it seemed like he had failed once again.

After putting up the divider this time, he held it in place with his right hand so that it wouldn’t fall over and returned to his book. It was fine at first, but after a short while, he felt another glare. This time, Jaeyoung had stood up and was drawing while looking diagonally across at Sangwoo.

‘That crazy bastard.’ Sangwoo moved his lips and silently cursed.

Jaeyoung had contributed to their team project, kindly given him coffee, and removed the barrier from his preferred walking path. However, he had then ruined Sangwoo’s reputation in front of the professor by joking around with the script and was now distracting him from his studies by watching him from the side.

Things were better than the red-padded coat days, but today’s green coat was just as irritating. Sangwoo decided to start studying at home instead. His desk at home wasn’t as wide as the one in the library, and the lighting was dim, but it would be much better to study at home since he wouldn’t be able to get anything done like this.

Sangwoo violently pulled out his earplugs and tried to pack his stuff, but from he heard the sound of a page being torn from a notebook beside him. When he put his textbook in his backpack and turned around again, the paper that Jaeyoung had torn out was placed in front of him.

“It’s a gift.”

Jaeyoung had drawn a caricature in the notebook. The drawing was as exaggerated as those found in American political cartoons. The cheekbones stuck out and the eyes bulged, with dark shadows drawn beneath. The lips were twisted in a grimace and the neck was so thin, it looked like it would break. Most exaggerated of all though, was the tremendously over-sized black baseball cap. Sangwoo tore the paper to pieces on the spot.

“You’re going too far, really.”

He ignored Jaeyoung’s murmur and put each piece of the torn paper into his hand. Then he threw them into the trash can on his way out.

“Do you know how much I get paid when I do magazine illustrations ?”

“What does that have to do with me?”

“What I’m saying is that it’s not the type of drawing you just tear into pieces like that.”

“I didn’t tear it because you can’t draw well, but because it was you who drew it, sunbae.”

“You happily drank the coffee I gave you, though.”

“Cause it wasn’t made by you.”

“You’re making me speechless.”

It was 13:32 (1:32 PM) when he exited the library. It had only been a huge waste of time. When Sangwoo got on his bike, Jaeyoung shouted from afar.

“Sangwoo!”

“What?”

“It’s a bit early, but good night.”

It was completely meaningless to tell him such a thing in broad daylight. Though, it wouldn’t be nice even if he said it at night.

“I hope you have a nightmare, sunbae.”

The bike went downhill.

 

return 0;

 

 

Things got even better the next day. Since Sangwoo only had classes related to his major on Friday, Jaeyoung slept face down on the desk throughout all of first and second period. Sangwoo made an effort to concentrate on class while holding his pen, ruminating over the things he regretted from the previous day. He was in good condition despite Jaeyoung being next to him.

“Do you want me to buy you dinner again today?”

After class, Jaeyoung offered to get Sangwoo free stuff for no reason again that day. If someone else had offered, he would’ve accepted, but because it was Jaeyoung, he had to use his brain.

i) Accept

Financial gain (Y), Stress (Y) = low damage

ii) Refuse – If Jaeyoung follows him to the school cafeteria:

Financial gain (N), Stress (Y) = high damage

iii) Refuse – If Jaeyoung goes to another restaurant:

Financial gain (N), Stress (N) = status quo

 

If he accepted his offer, there’d be a 100% chance of him eating with Jaeyoung, so he would get stressed. If Jaeyoung followed him even if he refused, he wouldn’t get a free meal and he’d get even more stressed. It all depended on his opponent’s reaction, so he had no choice but to make an educated guess and take a risk.

“I don’t want to.”

“School cafeteria again today, then?”

“Yes.”

“You’re a school cafeteria maniac. They should give you an award.”

Luckily, the third option was a winner. After Jaeyoung went away, Sangwoo entered the cafeteria alone. He peacefully ate in an unfrequented corner of the cafeteria as usual. He finished the meal only a minute later than he normally did, so it was good thus far. However, Jaeyoung was waiting by the cafeteria exit.

“Here.”

It was ‘Blackholic,’ without fail. Like the previous day, Sangwoo accepted the can, examined the exterior, shook it to make sure there wasn’t anything wrong with it, and then popped it  open. Jaeyoung asked something strange while he took his first sip.

 

“You want to do well on the Chinese skit, right?”

 

“Obviously.”

“Then let’s go somewhere.”

It was a strange request to go to a certain place in order to do well on the skit.

“Where?”

“To go look for our costumes?”

“Why?”

“You’re supposed to be a Qing merchant, so are you going to wear a t-shirt with English on it?”

“But it’s time to walk.”

“You can do that later.”

Jaeyoung got irritated, but finally grabbed Sangwoo by the wrist and began to drag him away.

“This is an assault. I’m going to report it. I said, I’ll report it,” Sangwoo yelled while holding his cellphone in his other hand. However, Jaeyoung just frowned and took away his cell phone and put it in Sangwoo’s pocket. He was stronger than he looked.

“I’ll let you draw a red line today,”2 he continued.

“You stubborn bastard. Why on earth are you doing this to someone who is trying to help you? After we finish everything and you still think it is assault, report me. I won’t stop you.”

Was he really trying to help? Sangwoo was suspicious, but he decided to believe him. Jaeyoung let go of his wrist when he answered: “Got it.”

“You’re going to be a Qing merchant, right?,” Jaeyoung asked.

“Yes.”

Of course. That character had a lot more lines, so there was a high probability of getting a high score.

“Then I’ll be a customer and a voice phishing guy.”3

Jaeyoung simply entered the student center without elaborating on where they were going. After they went up the stairs, Jaeyoung stopped at a door  with “Theater Department” written on it.

As he opened the door, a messy room with props, masks, and costumes appeared. On top of a small refrigerator was a pile of Blackholic canned coffee that Jaeyoung had hoarded. There were posters of past plays on the wall and two boys sitting on the couch, playing a soccer game on a console.

“You’re here, Jaeyoung sunbaenim?”

“Never mind us, just keep doing what you were doing.”

Without even giving them as much as a glance, Jaeyoung moved the mannequin aside and opened a door behind it. Sangwoo entered the room when Jaeyoung gestured to him.

The room was arranged like a two-tier closet with rods  attached to three walls. It was frighteningly small, but there were all sorts of costumes tightly packed in there. Jaeyoung picked up a stick and used it to poke between the clothes on the top tier. Sangwoo followed his lead and searched along the bottom tier for Qing dynasty era clothing, but it wasn’t easy.

“What do you think of this?”

Jaeyoung had found something meeting his requirements among tons of clothes. It was a blue robe that started from the neck and went all the way down to the ankles, with a belt around the waist, and an intricate gold pattern on the chest. He took out a purple robe with a similar design and placed it on top of Sangwoo’s body.

“Is this better, or is that better?” Jaeyoung asked.

“They look the same.”

“The hem is different, though. The hem.”

“Just go with anything. It’s weird to care this much about outfits for a Chinese skit.”

“This is what one ought to do if one is planning on getting a perfect score. I want to wear this one.”

Jaeyoung seemed to like yellow clothes with similar designs (actually, they all looked the same in Sangwoo’s eyes).

“Look for a pigtail.” Jaeyoung ordered. Sangwoo did as he was told and squatted down and searched for wigs in a box, but since he couldn’t find any, he considered his actions to be unprofitable. As he reached for another box to rummage through, Jaeyoung suddenly squatted low to be at Sangwoo’s level, so his face was now where his shin had been a moment before.“Please move back a bit.”

“Oh, gotcha.”

Jaeyoung only spoke, but didn’t actually move a single inch. Sangwoo dug through the box while feeling uncomfortable. Before long, his head felt bare. When he looked up, Jaeyoung was holding Sangwoo’s ball cap. Even as Sangwoo saw that Jaeyoung  stood as still as a statue, Sangwoo couldn’t figure out what kind of trick he was pulling. Sangwoo guessed that he would like to have the hat, since he had been talking about the hat since yesterday.

“It’s an old thing that I’ve been using since high school. Just buy one.”

Jaeyoung could only look closely at Sangwoo’s face.

“If you don’t come looking for me in the future, I’ll buy you the same kind of cap.” Sangwoo suggested.

Although Sangwoo made this suggestion with an if statement,4 he guessed his solution to this cap issue still wouldn’t work. Borrowing Jang Jaeyoung’s own expression, things would not have come this far if they could simply be solved with a cheap hat.

Jaeyoung reacted oddly. This reaction  wasn’t one of mockery, sarcasm, or any other form of teasing. He didn’t put the cap on himself or do anything Sangwoo would have predicted. The hand that didn’t have the cap in it appeared in front of Sangwoo’s eyes.

“You have something here.”

The long fingers very slowly came closer. There was plenty of time to avoid them, but Sangwoo had been paralyzed by a strange kind of tension.

Eventually, Jaeyoung’s index finger and middle finger very slowly stretched out and touched Sangwoo’s bangs. The moment the tips of his fingers touched Sangwoo’s forehead, there was a static electric shock.

Sangwoo crushed the box as he stepped back. An instinctive rejection of the unpleasant stimulus made him hit Jaeyoung’s hand.

“Put it down.”

“You look much better without a hat on. Why are you so covered up?”

“I can do what I want. ”

He extended his hand, but Jaeyoung didn’t return his cap . Sangwoo got angry.

“I’m asking you to give it back.”

“Why? Let’s look at your face a bit.”

______________________________________________________________________________

Footnotes

 

1Hyung means older brother in Korean (when said by a male to a male). It is also used by friends, indicating a close relationship. Sangwoo can be very literal-minded. He thinks Jaeyoung referring to himself as his (Sangwoo’s) hyung is an unacceptable degree of familiarity best used only among family members.

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2The term ‘red line’ appears to be somewhat of a complex Korean idiom having to do with subverting the justice system (the law) and somehow managing to commit a crime within the confines of the law. Sangwoo mentions this ‘red line’ concept to Jaeyoung. Sangwoo sees Jaeyoung as constantly toeing this ‘red line’ of almost assaulting him (getting too close in a threatening manner, grabbing his wrist, etc.) and of almost stealing from him (taking his things without asking but then immediately compensating him).

 

3Voice phishing is a very common scam in Korea:  https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Voice_phishing. Although this skit is set in the Qing Dynasty, they are incorporating modern phrases they received in their handouts on the first day of class. Voice phishing obviously didn’t exist during that era.

4‘if’ was actually written in English and refers to ‘if statements’ in computer programming languages. Here is a resource about if statements: https://www.computerhope.com/jargon/i/ifstatme.htm. Sangwoo assumes Jaeyoung removes his ball cap and has made reference to it a few times because he thinks Jaeyoung wants one of his own. When the condition of an if statement is met or ‘true,’ something will happen (displaying a value, running a function, etc.) Using this framework, if it is true that Jaeyoung wants his own ball cap, then he’ll truly get what he wants and leave Sangwoo in peace. Else, nothing will happen. Back to the drawing board about how to get rid of that troublesome Jaeyoung.