So Long For Now, Summer

So Long For Now, Summer

Chapter 33

Bad Memories

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[Why don’t you look at me and answer me?] 7:20 p.m. (Y)

He’s a pushover with love and compassion.

[I’m fine.] 7:21 p.m. (S)

[I’m fine. I’m fine. Shut up. I’m fine.] 7:21 p.m. (S)

[Both] 7:22 p.m. (S)

[Are you going to keep living with your husband?] 7:22 p.m. (Y)

[It’s not like that…] 7:22 p.m.

She stopped writing her message. It was ridiculous of her to say so in this situation. She couldn’t bear to answer because it must be funny to see her. At that time, she heard Woo Jin-ha coming in from the front door.

[Talk to me tomorrow.] 7:23 p.m. (S)

[I’m sure you’re just gonna do your job.] 7:23 p.m. (Y)

Just before she turned off the chat window, she saw Kim Yun-hyeong’s last words and laughed, and she saw his face in her mind. While Woo Jin-ha’s eyes that looked at her face turned to the cell phone in her hand. She naturally put it down and said.

“I’m going to see my aunt tomorrow. Can you get out?” (S)

“You said you’d go, why would you ask?” (J)

“Because you’ve been acting like a guard.” (S)

She added a little sarcastically without realizing it. He asks with a blank face.

“What’s wrong with her?” (J)

“She was hospitalized in a car accident a while ago.”(S)

“When.” (J)

“It’s been weeks already.” (S)

“Why didn’t you tell me?” (J)

“It doesn’t have much to do with Jin-ha-ssi..” (S)

“……” (J)

“I haven’t actually been to the hospital yet. My aunt said that pregnant women shouldn’t come there, because she hates it.” (S)

“It doesn’t matter.” (J)

“Just a superstition. You don’t bring a child who’s not even born where sick or dead people come and go every day.” (S)

He nods silently, even though she thought he’d make an expression that he’d listen to all sorts of uncivilized words. She smiled a little.

“It doesn’t matter because I don’t have the child anymore.” (S)

“……” (J)

He was stiff without saying a word even though it was a light word. Then he replied.

“Okay, let’s go.” (J)

She shook her head as if she was going with him.

“I don’t mind going alone.” (S)

“Don’t you want me to come with you?” (J)

She thought for a moment about which answer would be appropriate.

‘It’s not important enough for you to go there yourself?’ It’s already said in a similar way. It doesn’t matter. ‘My aunt hates you?’ In fact, her aunt hated Woo Jin-ha, but she was not the first person to like money.

But does the reason need to be appropriate? She felt uncomfortable going to see her family’s issues with him for any reason. She’s getting divorced soon, she hopes so. She doesn’t want to put him in her real family for a while… Whatever it is.

“Don’t you like it?” (J)

He quickly penetrated the essence. It seemed to her that she didn’t decline because she thought of him the way she used to. When she is silent still, he speaks nonchalantly.

“Okay, I won’t go.” (J)

Then she quickly stood up when he took out his cell phone to tell Secretary Choi to carry out the mission.

“Never mind. Don’t even ask Secretary Choi to do that.” (S)

“Driving is tiring.” (J)

“—I want to go alone. I’m comfortable with that. It’s not that I don’t want to cause trouble to Secretary Choi.” (J)

He looks at me quietly with his phone.

“Of course, it’s also true that I don’t want to cause trouble. But I just don’t like it. Being with your people.” (S)

“……” (J)

She grabbed his wrist holding the phone, pulled it down and headed towards the kitchen. No matter what he bought, She didn’t want to get more of his food, so she rummaged through the pantry.

“I will cook. now stop—” (S)

“—Leave it.” (J)

He forcibly took her hands off the pan and took her away. She was quietly watching the back of the cook.

In the end, they sat down again and ate. Seeing him taking things for granted, even things that are normal to others, and things that are not normal to them, made her a little sick of it and dizzy. 

“Liver?” (J)

“It’s a little salty.” (S)

She heard him chuckle.

“Next time I’ll make it a little more bland.” (J)

“Next time, just don’t do it.” (S)

“Then I’ll do something else.” (J)

“Something else. Being with Jin-ha-ssi all day is not very fun.” (S)

It would have been unimaginable just ten days ago. He has a smiling expression on his face. In fact, it’s almost like laughing.

“You’re not here to have fun.” (J)

“I really feel like I’m being punished.” (S)

“Because it’s a bee.” (J)

“Isn’t it a punishment to not lift a single hand of mine?” (S)

“It’s not fun. I will learn.” (J)

“It’s over now. I’m going to work.” (J)

There won’t be any room anymore. She knew the way he worked was close to self-abuse. He hasn’t been able to rest for a single day, and this has already made a big hole in him.

She continued looking down at the half-shrunken rice bowl.

“I don’t want to be with you like this.” (S)

When she woke up one day, she was afraid that her heart would melt away. She thinks this might be enough to make him think it’s okay. She’s afraid the torture of hope will make her head stupid again. There are no silly words. The meal ended quietly. 

She remembered the last time she went to the hospital. Ten days have passed since that day.

The terrible pain of that time is rather far away. The sound of the bed wheels rattling under her head, a scream that didn’t sound like her own voice, the moment when the amniotic fluid burst and all the blood seemed to drain out of her body… It all loses its sense of reality like a dream, and it occasionally flashes through her head like a scene in an unrelated video.