Split Zone No.13

Volume 4

226 Gaoqin Jiuye鈥檚 Heart

鈥淪o you鈥檝e never loved me鈥︹€?I said bitterly as I squatted on the floor.

Nie Zun responded coldly, 鈥淵es, I鈥檝e never loved you.鈥?br>
I shut my eyes and sucked in a breath, wiping the tears off my face. Standing up, I saw her again as I looked towards Nie Zun.

She was standing behind him. Nie Zun was half a head taller than her, and she looked so tiny and frail in that red dress. They looked like a perfect couple.

She smiled faintly. She looked a little lonely like this.

She continued looking at me as she stood behind Nie Zun. Her gaze seemed to be asking if I thought he was speaking the truth, whether it was really true that he didn鈥檛 love me anymore.

I slowly made my way towards her; towards him.

I reached out for his hand as I reached him, putting it on my chest. 鈥淩ip my heart out and tell her that you鈥檝e never loved her.鈥?br>
Nie Zun鈥檚 beautiful eyelashes fluttered slightly. I couldn鈥檛 tell what he was thinking behind those unfathomable eyes.

His hand was cold like before, and I felt no warmth from him even when it was on my chest. He did not move an inch.

I looked at him. 鈥淪omeone who only thinks about protecting me and who had never thought about saving himself in times of danger, he鈥檚 telling me now that he had never loved me.鈥?br>
I pressed harder on his hand as I spoke with certainty. 鈥淣ie Zun, do you think I鈥檓 that dumb? That I鈥檒l believe you if you say this?鈥?br>
Nie Zun spoke calmly, but he did not sound as cold as before. 鈥淭hink of it however you want to. I can鈥檛 do anything about your thoughts anyway.鈥?He pulled his hand away from me and looked away.

I laughed in self-mockery. 鈥淚t鈥檚 fine if you really don鈥檛 love me. I鈥檓 just afraid that you鈥檙e really treating me like an idiot who鈥檒l believe whatever you鈥檝e said.鈥?br>
After taking a breath, I continued. 鈥淭here鈥檚 no use talking about all this now. I鈥檝e achieved my goal since you鈥檝e remembered everything. Since you don鈥檛 love me, let鈥檚 go on our separate paths from now on, as you have wished.鈥?br>
I turned around and pulled Gaoqin Jiuye towards that vat of water he had originally come from.

I spoke as calmly as I could as I passed Nie Zun. 鈥淣ie Zun, I鈥檒l only say I love you just this once. I don鈥檛 know why you鈥檙e doing this, but if you鈥檙e really letting me go today, I鈥檒l never be coming back. From now on, let鈥檚 go on our own paths and never turn back.鈥?br>
I teared up after this.

Once again, I鈥檝e confirmed that I had fallen in love with him for real.

My heart was racing as I hoped he would extend a hand to stop me from leaving.

I could forget everything if he did this. I would run into his arms in tears. I would tell him that no matter who I loved in the past, be it Gao Qi or Gaoqin Jiuye or whoever it might have been, the one I loved now was you, Nie Zun.

But, nothing of that sort happened.

He remained silent as he stood behind me, letting me leave with Gaoqin Jiuye.

I lost all hope as I reached that vat of water.

A pair of hands stopped me just as I was about to pull Gaoqin Jiuye with me into the water.

She disappeared earlier but she appeared again right before me.

Her slender hands blocked my path. 鈥淎re you really leaving him? He had just regained his memories and he needs you by his side right now. Have you also forgotten what Huai Du said? How would you know that he really isn鈥檛 affected by this blood-changing process? What if he still has demonic energy in him? Are you really leaving him like this? Just because he says he doesn鈥檛 love you?

鈥淒idn鈥檛 he still stay by your side for so long even when you didn鈥檛 show your affection for him in the past? And you鈥檙e deciding to give up on him so easily now?鈥?br>
I let go of Gaoqin Jiuye鈥檚 hand slightly.

Am I going to give up like this鈥?br>
Am I really going to abandon him like this鈥?br>
No. I have to get to the bottom of this no matter how he treats me.

Just when I made my decision, I felt something pull on my arm. Gaoqin Jiuye was pulling me towards the water vat with him.

Before I could even react, Gaoqin Jiuye was already pulling me somewhere else through the water.

鈥淧ch鈥︹€?I spat out a mouthful of water as we finally surfaced.

Instead of glaciers, we were in another stone room.

Before I could speak, Gaoqin Jiuye pulled me out of the water by the collar.

I stared at him as I pushed him away. 鈥淲hy did you grab me? I haven鈥檛 finished talking.鈥?br>
Gaoqin Jiuye looked at me with fiery eyes. 鈥淲hat else do you have to say? He already said he doesn鈥檛 love you. Why stay when he didn鈥檛 even stop you from leaving?鈥?br>
鈥淚鈥︹€?I was rendered speechless.聽Right. What else was I鈥?hoping for?

鈥淟i Shen, you might want to take a look at me. I鈥檓 right here beside you. It鈥檚 not only Nie Zun who had been by your side. I, Gaoqin Jiuye, had been here too. I鈥檝e known you for a longer time even. I鈥檝e been protecting you all this while. Why did you fall in love with Gao Qi previously, Li Shen? And you鈥檝e also fallen in love with somebody else when I finally thought you鈥檇 be by my side. Tell me why.鈥?br>
He took me by the shoulders as he looked at me like a helpless child.

I have never seen Gaoqin Jiuye like this.

I turned pale. 鈥淚鈥檓 sorry. I just don鈥檛 understand. If everything is like what you described it to be, then why didn鈥檛 you just tell me everything? Gaoqin Jiuye, why did you have to do all this behind my back? You even pretended to be Gao Qi. If I remember right, you鈥檝e never even acted like you knew me from the very moment I met you here in the Split Zone.鈥?br>
Gaoqin Jiuye let go of me slowly. 鈥淗onestly, I鈥檝e never thought of meeting you again. I just wanted you to live a peaceful life in the Western District. Life here can be good too. You even have people protecting you here.鈥?br>
I smirked. 鈥淲hat right do you have to decide for others? If you really loved me, why did you bring me here but refuse to meet me?鈥?br>
Gaoqin Jiuye鈥檚 gaze wavered. 鈥淏ecause鈥?You鈥檇 be sad鈥?if you learnt the truth鈥︹€?br>
My heart hurt at this.

So it鈥檚 like this鈥?br>
Because if I learnt that you were the one I liked instead of Gao Qi, then that guilt I felt towards Gao Qi would turn into a worse sorrow. Is this the reason you chose to hide the truth?

So, you chose to save me but keep me in the dark about your existence?

I cried. 鈥淵ou. Why are you such an idiot鈥︹€?br>
An exhausted smile appeared on Gaoqin Jiuye. 鈥淚diot? Not really, since I didn鈥檛 treat you very well anyway. I wasn鈥檛 able to give you a happy life even after bringing you here. I wasn鈥檛 able to protect you all the time either, because there鈥檚 someone else who needs my protection here, and I cannot betray him.鈥?br>
My tears fell. 鈥淵ou鈥檙e referring to Si Luo?鈥?br>
Gaoqin Jiuye looked into the distance. 鈥淵es. I鈥檝e always been living in darkness in this world, but Si Luo lit the way for me. Li Shen, I never should鈥檝e liked you. You and Gao Qi were the perfect couple. Gao Qi鈥檚 flaws were caused by me, and your happiness was destroyed by me. Everything happened because of me. What right do I have to be by your side like this?

鈥淚 just didn鈥檛 expect that someone like Nie Zun would appear by your side.鈥?br>
He continued after a short pause. 鈥淚 was initially happy for you when I saw him protecting you. I thought there was finally someone who existed solely for you. Since he was able to protect you, I kept telling myself that I should be retreating now. I could retreat with peace of mind.

鈥淏ut, haha, it鈥檚 really difficult. There鈥檚 also Si Luo. You might find that I鈥檓 always hot and cold towards you, probably because of these reasons. I envy Nie Zun, but I can鈥檛 help but be jealous of him at the same time.鈥?br>
My tears continued flowing as I saw Gaoqin Jiuye鈥檚 vulnerable side.

He had never been like this. He had always been proud, noble and cold, like a mighty god of death.

But now, he looked so vulnerable.

This was all because of me.

Fate teases us in strange ways. If only I didn鈥檛 kill Gao Qi, if only I didn鈥檛 misunderstand Gaoqin Jiuye. If only, I didn鈥檛 meet Nie Zun.

Sadly, we cannot turn back time.

I started weeping quietly.

I knew exactly how I felt now, and because of this certainty, I knew that I could never go back.

There was no way I could go back now.

I have fallen in love with Nie Zun for real. I have fallen too deeply for him.

鈥淏ecause I know that you鈥檝e fallen for Nie Zun, there鈥檚 no way I could tell you all this. You鈥檇 just be more upset if you learn about this after falling in love with him.鈥?br>
Gaoqin Jiuye smiled bitterly. 鈥淚 guess there are some selfish reasons behind my actions too, because I鈥檇 rather not talk about love, ever. I hoped that I would never have to hear you say that you love him.

鈥淪adly, all of it was a mere pipe dream.鈥?br>
The corners of his eyes were wet now.