Surviving a Shounen Manga

The Gods of the Goblins

"Where am I?"

When I opened my eyes again, it was to a pure white world.

Waves of light were constantly flowing up, down, left and right in all directions.

Even where I stood was on a stream of light. It was flowing like all the others, but I oddly felt rooted in place.

The Realm of Dreams (夢中界).

A world within the subconscious, where goblins meet their gods and go on a journey together.

I knew it as soon as I saw it. This was the place I knew.

To be precise, it was a world I had seen before.

‘It… it worked.'

I was stunned.

I really managed to reach here.

The reason why I'd had a very slim chance of success was not simply because I and Chinuavi were of different races.

Rather, it was because the fundamental structure of the ability itself was different.

The ability came from the gods.

The goblins can never demonstrate their unique abilities except through their five gods.

This meant that, in order to mimic the goblins' abilities, I also had to go through their gods, and to be honest, I doubted it would ever work.

A human meeting the gods of the goblins? Is that possible?

So, I just tried it once with the idea of ​​testing the limits of the [Mimic Acrobat]. But all my worries turned out to be a lie.

It wasn't even that difficult.

What I did was to imitate the ritual of the goblins that called their gods. It was an act similar to a kind of prayer, and all I had to do was to remember the details of their existence and then repeat ‘I want to meet you'.

‘Okay, leave it there for now.'

The funny thing was that I actually achieved this.

But now it was time to focus on the present again.

As I saw the waves of light flowing all around me, tension slowly began to accumulate.

What would happen now?

Who, exactly, would come?

‘Is he coming?'

If the imitation was successful, the god who'd blessed Chinuavi would probably come visit me. Then, after exchanging various greetings, he would allow me acts of ‘mischief' on his behalf.

But I couldn't be sure.

I knew that Chinuavi had already been blessed, but this was my first time entering the dream realm. Any of the gods can appear to a goblin who has not yet been ‘chosen'. That was the rule of this realm.

What was going to happen?

I considered the five gods of the goblins.

Eldest, God of Mischief.

Second, God of Lies.

Third, God of Whimsy.

Fourth, God of Pretence.

Youngest, God of Sabotage.

Among them, the god Chinuavi was blessed by was the first, the God of Mischief, and in a way, he was the mellowest (?) of them.

Or rather, should I say he had the least ‘malice' that was typical of the goblins?

When I'd first encountered the goblin species at the middle parts of the original storyline, I'd honestly been a tad confused.

Simply because I didn't think that this was a race that fit the manga Adventure King.

Basically, the villains in shounen manga aren't usually all that bad. Although they may be numerous, it's hard to find someone truly irredeemable in their ranks. Many of them even turn into the protagonist's helpers.

Because such developments fit the shounen manga theme.

These goblins were not all villains, of course, but unfortunately, there was something wrong with their brains from the start.

They didn't much care if they ended up harming others, was the problem. To the extent that you could only exclaim, what the hell?

In particular, those blessed by the God of Sabotage were very prone to causing accidents.

Of course, such a setting made it easy to create interesting events, and perhaps even to build eye-catching characters, but there were definitely occasions when you couldn't help but frown at their antics.

And these five goblin gods were the ones who bore the responsibility for all those vicious actions.

So I'd wondered, if Leo would fight these gods too one day? I'd even considered the possibility. That's why I'd often considered them ‘villains'.

‘What if they do something weird right after we meet?'

It was something you could never be sure of. They were bigshots who couldn't be controlled.

That was then –

"Huh?"

The waves of light surrounding me swayed for a moment.

In that instant, I could feel it.

Something, something was coming.

And not just that,

‘… C-, crazy.'

Not just one of something.

Soon after,

Krrrrng–.

In an instant, the whole world turned upside down.

…

Fortunately, I didn't faint. But it felt like all my bones were shaking and creaking.

While I was trying to come back to my senses, barely holding on to a single strand of reason –

Suddenly, a voice like thunder came from the air.

– Here's something interesting!

‘… I want to go back.'

It was this tough from the start.

This unknown god was even calling his friends. It was too tough for me by my lonesome.

Soon after,

– Who is this guy?

– Maybe a human?

Two other voices rang in my ears. Like the first, they too were thunderous roars.

And at the same time, my body began to tremble.

‘This, this…'

This was something I'd experienced once before.

As a test, I'd tried to mimic some abilities that my body couldn't yet handle. It felt similar to what I'd experienced back then. Only, the pressure this time was several times more than that.

Three gods had gathered before me.

As I recalled, the goblins were also set to have a hard time withstanding the pressure when three or more gods flocked to them in the process of ‘recruitment'.

But,

– Who came?

– A hornless goblin?

Three wasn't the limit.

‘Heh heh, it's all gone to shit.'

Suddenly, all five gods had rushed in.

In my mind, the alarm bells were ringing non-stop. That this was dangerous. That my body couldn't stand it.

– Hey! Who are you?

– How did a guy who isn't even a goblin get in here?

– Reveal your identity.

– You bastard! You must be a spy from the monsters!

– I think there're some traces of a goblin, though?

Even hearing the words one at a time, I was on the verge of losing my mind.

I couldn't distinguish one from the other.

"All but the God of Mischief, please leave!"

I cried out with all my might.

I had no idea if they'd listen or not, but I had to try.

But the problem was,

– What's with this squat-jaw?

– Does he want to be chosen? This guy?

– Yeah, I'll just go. Hehe. He's crazy!

– Want me to go just because you say so? Would you go if I ask you to go?

– I can be here all day!

They pretended not to hear me.

It was a mistake. I'd rather not have said anything.

I should've remembered that ‘pranks' and ‘caprices' were basically the standard when it came to the settings of these gods.

Well, even if I was regretting speaking up now, it was already too late.

‘Hey, might this turn out to be a big deal?'

My mind had already gone numb.

But no new clever plans came to mind, and I couldn't even afford to faint. Because I wasn't sure if I'd be safe after that.

At this time when I'd reached my limits –

– Huh? Is this guy about to explode?

One god noticed that I was in a serious condition.

Of course, he might've known far earlier and only chose to mention it now, but it still felt like a ray of light had descended from the heavens.

Then, as if the other goblin gods also recognized this, they followed along, one word at a time.

– Hmmm, he's so weak. Is it because he's not a goblin?

– Really. It's no fun.

– He'll die at this rate. I'll leave first.

– Me first! Going!

Then they started to back off one by one. They seemed to understand that their existence was a threat to me.

Fortunately. They were beings of reason.

– I'm sorry. Come back next time when you're stronger. Let's have some fun then.

‘… God of Mischief.'

After a while,

"… Haah."

I barely came back to my senses, but I didn't feel very good. How come I managed to meet the gods, but couldn't gain anything from it?

Once they lose interest, goblins never come back.

Opportunities are useless to the unprepared.

As they said, I felt like I should've come after raising my physical ability to a level where I could withstand their presence.

"By the way, why haven't I returned to reality?"

This was a bit of an odd situation.

The goblins in the original work returned to reality as soon as their god left.

‘What's happening here?'

While I was looking around.

Suddenly,

– I haven't left yet.

I heard the voice of one of the gods.

"…!?"

For a moment, I was so shocked that my heart felt like it might burst.

I carefully inquired about the identity of the voice.

"… Who are you?"

– The God of Sabotage.

"Ah…"

It was embarrassing.

Only this god was left.

– I was interested in you, so I secretly stayed. You got the attention of the others, so stealing you might be fun.

The Disruptor God's voice spoke something very blatantly in a dry tone, as if he was mentioning something quite natural.

I was able to guess what this current situation of a ‘single' god staying, meant. But I still hoped, if possible…

"What you mean is…."

– You said you wanted it.

"Is that… is it possible?"

– You know nothing. I can do it.

"…"

By this point, the situation seemed clear.

The Disruptor God had decided to ‘choose' me.

Meaning, I would be able to have him ‘descend', and use his abilities.

And, naturally, this –

‘This… won't be an imitation, is it?'

It was absurd.

I mimicked Chinuavi, but instead of his unique ability, I'd end up getting a different ability?

In fact, it was nothing more than a joke. There was no need to mention the probability, and it was inherently impossible.

But nevertheless, I couldn't ignore this situation.

Not just because it was a god of a race who mentioned it.

Because I thought it really might become possible.

The Disruptor God.

A god sometimes called the goblin, among goblins.

When first introducing this being, the author had defined him with just two lines of text.

[In this world, there is only one rule that applies to the God of Sabotage.]

[That he doesn't follow any rules.]

If so, he might be able to really imbue me with the power of a goblin. Not simply permitting imitation, but providing me a new unique ability.

And this,

"I’m sorry, but can I decline?"

This had to be stopped at any cost.

– What?

The worst of the worst. A devil wearing the mask of a goblin.

These were not my words. It was the community's official opinion about the Disruptor God.

The other goblin gods were okay. However, associating with this god in particular was a tough sell.

Because he would lead me to hell.

The goblins chosen by the God of Sabotage clearly showed exceptional abilities in the work. Perhaps it was because of the power of a god who disregarded all rules, there were cases where they showed more than one unique ability, and at other times displayed some ridiculous powers that completely ignored the plausibility of the situation.

But they all followed the same course.

To disturb everything, to incur everyone's wrath, and then get kicked out.

Because divine influence was so strong in them, they'd often start messing around at the drop of a hat.

What if I fell under his influence?

Leave alone being the rival, the image I'd carefully built up so far would be destroyed in an instant.

It was best to quickly block him before we became involved in any way.

But the problem was,

– Did I hear you wrong?

It wasn't easy to refuse this divine favour.

A god who was the most passionate about disturbing others.

A selfish and reckless guy.

If I blindly refused, the results won't be any good. The more I emphasized my dislike, the more passionate he would become.

There was only one way. Giving him a surprise.

As a god who feels pleasure by burning down the status quo, he tends to be quite generous with those who show unexpected surprises.

"You heard me right. I will decline your request."

– Why? I can give you the powers of a goblin. It's very valuable. There is no need to worry that it will conflict with your original abilities, either. With my abilities…

"Again, there is no need for selling me on it. You don’t need to give me power."

– Hoo… why?

I felt his attention becoming slightly sharper.

Of course, the reason he showed generosity was not simply because he admired the unexpected.

It was simple. Because he hoped that the unexpected would make the situation more complicated and the game bigger. That way, he'd have more fun when I mess up.

If I allowed him to imagine a bigger arena, the Disruptor God would readily withdraw. He was pretty imaginative when it came to it.

"If I receive powers from you, I won’t be able to use the powers of the other goblin gods."

– … What?

"I intend to use all the goblin abilities."

– …

Did he swallow the bait?

There was no immediate response, but I was sure my plan had worked. It wasn't common for the God of Sabotage to shut up.

Then, I added a few more words to hammer the nail deeper in.

"I will set up another ritual in future. At that time, I will get the favours of all five goblin gods."

Then,

– Heh heh heh heh.

The Disruptor God burst into laughter.

He seemed genuinely happy, and the laughter went on for a while.

– Are you serious?

"Yes."

Actually, this was not an empty boast. After confirming that it was possible to meet the gods, there was no reason not to do it.

Surprisingly, the Disruptor God disappeared without a word.

– Alright, then see you soon. Hornless goblin, Squatjaw.

Then, a mass of pure white lights rushed towards me.

When I woke up, I was back in the same hut.

"Squatjaw!"

"Senior, are you okay?"

I knew that time flowed much slower in the dream realm than in reality, but it seemed that quite a bit of time had passed. Because they were staring at me with such concern.

However, what lurked in this one guy's gaze was a slightly different emotion.

"D-, did you meet? The goblin god?"

For some reason, Haka was trembling.

Come to think of it, he had a background setting of having studied amongst the goblins for a long time. He must've longed for a meeting with those gods all along.

"All right, so what happened with your unique ability… No, what do the gods look like? What did you say? Maybe the god…"

"Stop right there. What god? I'm not even a goblin, you know."

"… Ah."

So, for now, I decided to just pretend nothing had happened.

Because it didn't seem like a good idea to provoke a reaction. An inherently insidious character like Haka would have a hard time resisting envy and jealousy.

"By the way, what about the deciphering process?"

"It’s all finished while you were busy fainting."

Chinuavi smirked as if he'd been waiting for me to ask.

"Great job. Alright, so now…"

"Yes. We just have to go down."

I nodded.

Now it was time to go grab the treasure.

Underneath the basement was a large cave-like opening.

And at its centre, oddly enough, was a refrigerator. So the old man didn't lie when he told us to eat to our heart's content?

"There must be a treasure over there!"

I stopped Cocoa from rushing in.

"Danger."

"Huh?"

"There's still one test left."

Even if you find your way in and decipher the security device, you won't be able to claim the treasure.

There was one more obstacle that adventurers had to face.

That's right, the test of the ‘adversary'.

I raised my head and stared into the darkness beyond the refrigerator.

At that moment, the darkness moved, and ‘something' appeared.

A man with grey hair that fluttered like a lion's mane.

He walked out and uttered a single sentence.

"It’s late, so let’s start."

The Grey Lion.

Karl Zayed.

A very, very famous guy.

Even if Leo and Kiriko worked together right now, they wouldn't be able to resist him. The strongest character at this point, in name and in reality. The one who took first place in this Adventurer Qualification Test in the original story.

However,

"Don’t be so proud. Because I wasn't there back then."

"… What?"

I had no intention of going back.

I would take this guy down, and climb to the top.

I slowly met his sunken eyes.

Just this once, let's take a shot.

Editor's Notes:

None for this chapter.