System Break

The skies were dark and so was my mood. Gisael took care of the menial tasks and did what she could to comfort me.

Throughout my life when things were great - something would blindside me and fuck it all up. On my way to college basketball and possibly the pros I was young, naïve and there was no one to blame for my downfall except myself.

Then I was in one of the most elite special forces squads in the world until the twist of fate brought me low. And when I say low, I'd contemplated ending it all on several occasions. 

The same feeling stalked me now. Reyas almost died. Demon Bird did die. And if Reyas had died so would've our baby. I should be happy. I should be ecstatic. We survived. She lived and the baby lived. But when these things get a hold of your mind, sometimes you can't help being a glass half empty son of a bitch. 

Because it was so close - now I feared it. What about next time. The dread threatened my mind.

I looked up at the dark sky and sighed.

I trembled and yelled at the sky. "Fuck you." It wasn't directed to anyone in particular. It was directed at life's twists. 

I punched the rock cliff face. Fuck that hurt, but I did leave the tiniest of indentations - something to be proud of.

Gisael kept her distance while I fought my inner demons.

I cried and yelled at myself. "It's just a fucking bird." But it wasn't. It was an artificial lump with a soul, just like me. I was confused. "How do I get a woman pregnant? I'm not even me." 

The bird, the baby, and a woman I loved dearly. I felt the pressure I normally ignored.

I turned and saw Gisael staring at me. She smiled weakly and looked at the ground. It was unusual. She never smiled. Sure she'd bare her teeth at me, laugh and try to tease me, but she never smiled.

"Come here," I ordered, and she walked slowly into my embrace. I whispered, "I'm going to get stronger so I can protect everyone. I'm not going to let everything unravel and I'll protect Reyas and her baby. I'm not going to be blindsided again. Not for a third fucking time."

She held me and didn't say a word. She's damn smart. We held each other for a long time.

"Let's go," I said finally. We packed, tidied, and ran to the shaman's cave.

Four pairs of eyes looked at me when I entered but I only had eyes for one. "You're awake?"

"Yes," she said. She sounded strong.

"Feeling good?"

"I'm angry," she said. "It fuels me."

My mouth dropped. "Why? What happened?"

Her eyes blazed. "The clans are weak. They do not listen. Two, just two beastmen would have taken the land core. Because of their weakness we nearly lost our baby. We needed you to fight for us."

The shaman's voice sounded confident and proud. "It is time for change," he said. "She is ready now."

Reyas stood and there were no signs of weakness. 

"Are you healed?"

She shook her head. "But I feel good thanks to you. My bones mend stronger."

The shaman tilted his head towards me. "I have a favour to ask."

"Shoot," I said.

"Can you carry me?"

I laughed for a time and everyone felt nervous. The freed women stared and Reyas smiled shyly.

"Sure, if we can make a sling from the stuff you got here. Where am I carrying you to?"

"The Staggan Fort. We will take the land core and make a new home for it and me."

The older woman said, "This will bring unease. It will wreck the balance."

"I know," the shaman said. "It is time for change. Reyas is right – we are weak." I felt it would be hypocritical to point out that he wasn't really one of them.

We packed and made a sling for the deformed lump. 

"Put all the qi-cores in the land core," Reyas said.

"They're to trade for the mine."

"I know," she said. "It will make the trip easier and don't worry."

I trusted her so we loaded all the qi cores into the land core before the shaman removed it and handed it to Reyas. It was heavy and precious. She put the concentrated orb in her pack. It was the only thing she'd carry.

I was the last to leave the cave. The shaman left much behind, but they could retrieve it later. I looked in the corner where Demon Bird rested. Did the shaman intend for this to be his tomb, or did he have other plans for the bird that I wasn't aware of.

I reached for it through our connection and was surprised I still could. His presence, his mind wasn't there but I reached. I stretched and travelled through the connection. "Demon Bird," I said. There was no response. I gave him a final nod and left.

Gisael lifted the shaman into the sling on my back. He hung there with arms and legs dangling like a massive baby - except uglier.

I sniffed. "I thought the smell in the cave was all your ingredients." He grumbled, I laughed, and we ran.

The dark clouds were ominous, and the sun barely peaked through all day. We were fortunate and didn't run into any monsters all day.

I marvelled at how well Reyas moved. Gisael wasn't injured and she couldn't keep up. Reyas led us all through the mountains to her old home.

The younger woman couldn't stop staring at me. I was used to it and didn't mind when it was a beautiful woman. She couldn't hold a candle to Reyas, but she wasn't ugly either. 

I asked her, "What were the beastmen going to do with you?"

She shivered and her mother answered. "The foul creatures were using us."

"For directions?" I asked.

"And other things," the mother said.

I suddenly felt guilty for bringing the memory back to their thoughts. I can't imagine sex with a giant ape man was enjoyable. No wonder they were a mess.

"Can you tell if we are pregnant?" the mother asked, and I looked. I had no idea how this worked and when a baby developed a qi core. But I could not see anything inside her.

"Nothing there right now," I said. I didn't want to scare her, but I didn't want to lead her astray only for them to pop out a monster in nine months.

"It was only one night," the shaman said. 

I accidently bumped the heartless bastard against a rocky outcropping.

He whinged but then added. "If something appears in your or your daughters belly we can deal with it safely if we catch it early."

"No," the daughter said. "It will be my beastman. One who fights for us."

I laughed and her mother scowled. The girl knew how to turn adversity on its head. I could learn something from her. She owned it and it empowered her.

"Did they talk? Did they mention where they came from or others of their kind?"

The daughter sneered. "They revealed little other than their plans for us. They wanted the land core to make their own home here."

"May be there is more," the shaman said and cackled. 

"Not here," I said. "Why would only two come if more could assist."

The shaman snorted. "Until you three stood in their way they did not need more."

"It was your poison that killed the wolf," I reminded him.

"Does the crafter of the axe claim part of the battle?"

"Sure," I said. "Especially if it makes the difference."

He cackled. I felt like dropping him; the shaman was annoying. But Reyas would be upset, so I carried him to the Staggan Clan's fort.