Chapter Seventy One
Chu Xiaoxiao would still feel quite annoyed by the ridiculous ridicule of Bianzi's brother, but she couldn't bear it at this moment when she saw him despairing.
The relationship between her and her brother is so complicated, they are a bit displeased with each other, but they don't want each other to fall apart.
Chu Xiaoxiao dangled his fingers in a panic, trying to cheer him up, and said in a low voice, "Don't be like this, you are very good at acting, and you can sing on TV. Everyone does it for you. You are proud!"
Chu Xiaoyi said in a low voice: "It's useless to our mother..."
Seeing that her brother was about to demean herself again, Chu Xiaoxiao covered her elder brother's mouth with one hand, and hugged his head tightly with the other, decisively saying: "No! Mom is very happy too!"
Chu Xiaoyi was still a little depressed, but now she suddenly hugged her head, only feeling suffocation instead of autism: "..."
Chu Xiaoxiao felt that his brother was like a big fish stranded. He seemed to be dying on the shore, but she couldn't move him back into the water, so she could only throw water at him desperately to continue his life.
Chu Xiaoxiao used to praise his elder brother only in the daily newspaper, but now the rainbow fart is like a torrential river, arbitrarily spilling out: "You still look so good-looking. Mom will be happy to see you..."
Chu Xiaoxiao: Please forgive me for the exaggerated statement. It is more important to save my brother first.
Chu Xiaoyi removed her little hand covering her mouth, his face showed uncertainty, and the urn sounded angrily: "...really?"
Chu Xiaoxiao simply racked her brains, she said dryly: "Yes, you still go abroad to film, insist on studying and reading, come home often, mother is very happy!"
Chu Xiaoyi's body relaxed slightly, and he lazily said: "It's really nice to say, two more words of praise?"
When Chu Xiaoxiao heard this, she mistakenly thought that the cheap brother was regaining his vitality, and then began to talk ridiculously and swiftly. Just as she was about to turn her face and stretch out her fist to beat him, she looked up and found that he was still not in a high mood, and she just ridiculed vigorously.
Her small fists were half protruding, but they retracted weakly, with a look of confusion and sorrow on her small face.
Chu Xiaoyi was ready to be beaten. He didn't expect his sister to withdraw his hand again. He was a little surprised for a while: "What's the matter?"
Chu Xiaoxiao realized for the first time that her brother was worthy of an actor. She was almost deceived by his acting skills just now and really thought he had cheered up.
She has a little plug-in that can sense emotions, and she doesn't understand the reason why he forced an active atmosphere. She simply hugged his head and slapped her hair to soothe it, and muttered: "Snoring and snoring hair can't be scared..."
She didn't know the way to make people happy right away. She could only help the cheap brother be careful to smooth the hair like a cat. Maybe it could help him relieve him a little, right?
Chu Xiaoyi noticed her cautiousness, and felt helpless and sour for a while.
He didn't want to pass on the bad emotions to his younger sister, he just planned to pretend to be in the past, thinking about letting her play twice before turning over this article, but he didn't expect her to be so sensitive to other people's emotions.
Chu Xiaoxiao is like a small animal. If you deliberately provoke her, she will ignore you and wince, but if she finds that you are sad, low, and depressed, she will wander around you worriedly. , For fear that you will be autistic for a long time.
Chu Xiaoyi felt that it was not good for her to ask her sister for emotional value. She was still an ignorant child and coaxed him every day without reason.
However, she was a bit too smart. He thought that his acting skills were good enough, and he couldn't fool her.
Chu Xiaoxiao pressed his head to smooth the hair for a long time to his brother, and then she whispered: "If you are really uncomfortable, why don't you try to cry?"
Chu Xiaoxiao didn't understand Chu Xiaoyi's depression. She only knew that his chest was full of sour emotions. Perhaps if that feeling was released and resolved, he would feel relaxed and regain his strength.
Chu Xiaoyi said hard: "Men won't cry."
"Boys are also humans, and humans can cry."
Chu Xiaoxiao retorted with wide-eyed eyes. She thought about her brother's attitude towards saving face, and said with relief, "It's like sand falling into a shell. The shell sheds tears from the pain, but when opened, the pearl will be revealed..."
"You are hiding in the shell, and no one is watching what you do. It's good to open the shell!"
Chu Xiaoxiao shook the quilt and motioned. She felt that the quilt was his shell, blocking the outside view.
Chu Xiaoxiao looked at his brother's emotional color and made suggestions. Although the tears in reality are transparent, she always feels that the tears are blue. Maybe Chu Xiaoyi burst into tears and the emotional color will get better.
Relying on her own barren art knowledge, she wanted to paint on the emotional color drawing board, in an attempt to make her brother a warm color.
Chu Xiaoyi asked back: "Aren't you a human?"
Chu Xiaoxiao paused for a few seconds. She remembered her existence and hesitated: "If you need it, I can leave here..."
"Are you going to cry?
Then I leave myself?
Am I really out? "
Chu Xiaoxiao turned her head and drilled out one step at a time. She frequently looked back at her elder brother in the bed, not knowing whether to leave him here or not, but he could hear the meaning of seeing off the guests again in his tone.
Chu Xiaoxiao curled up in the corner of the bed hesitantly, and finally left the bed to his elder brother.
She wandered around the bed anxiously, and listened to the movement inside, but did not hear any crying.
Because the quilt blocked Chu Xiaoyi tightly, she couldn't even see his emotional color, let alone when he would recover.
Chu Xiaoyi actually couldn't cry, he just didn't want his sister to be down with him, and she didn't do anything wrong.
This was a problem left before she was born, and he should solve it alone, and it is hard to blame her.
Chu Xiaoyi returned to normal after coming out of the bed, but completely confused Chu Xiaoxiao.
Suddenly, she dared not mention the memorial book again, lest she would cause the cheap brother to wither and shut himself up and force him to sink into a dark corner.
However, mother Xiao Bi’s birthday gift still had to be prepared, and publisher Chu Xiaoxiao immediately made a bold decision, and she came to help the cheap brother complete the production of the first volume!
Chu Xiaoyi's schedule is very busy. He can spare a day to come back for meetings and do handicrafts. It is all the time that drives He Xin crazy.
He said today that he couldn't make a souvenir book, so there will be ghosts when he is free in the next few days. It is estimated that he can't count on it.
Chu Xiaoxiao made a decisive decision and decided to write a book for his brother. Since he could not write happy memories, she would write the happy memories of his brother and mother.
Of course, as a rigorous writer, she also made a special trip to the "Brother and Mother's Happy Memories Library" to look up the literature, planning to start writing after careful collection.
Chu Xiaoxiao asked his father to pick him up, and under the banner of visiting his grandma and others, he returned to his home in the old city.
On the way, she curiously asked: "Did mom, dad and brother lived here before?"
"Yes, your brother went to school nearby when he was young."
Chu Jiadong thought for a while, he thought that there was no little daughter in that memory, and added, "Xiao Xiao can come here often after he goes to elementary school. Uncle and they are all there anyway."
Chu Xiaoxiao jumped into his home in the old town, and immediately wanted to find the happy memories of his brother and mother, but he didn't find anything for a long time.
The area of the house in the old city is not too big. Chu Xiaoyi’s former room is now occupied by his little uncle. His class schedule and star stickers are still pasted on the wall when he was studying. There is also an ultra-old calendar next to it, which reveals deep The sense of age.
Chu Jiadong spoke with his grandmother and younger uncle in the living room. He didn't notice the little movements of his daughter, but only when she was playing at home.
The little uncle walked into the room, he looked at Chu Xiaoxiao who was inquiring around, and asked in doubt: "What does Xiao Xiao want?"
Chu Xiaoxiao: "Where are my brother's previous things?"
She doesn't know anything about her brother's past, and of course she wants to find some historical materials for research (?
).
Young uncle: "It should be in the storage room, what are you looking for?
Do you want to ask Xiao Yi? "
My younger uncle opened the storage room and Ren Chu Xiaoxiao looked for materials, but she only found yellowed workbooks, old guitars, old clothes, and a mess of odds and ends.
Her archeological trip was not very smooth, and she was a mess of blind search, and she couldn't distill happy memories.
"Don't make trouble with Uncle Xiao Xiao, you will have dinner later."
When Chu Jiadong heard the old and the young dingling in the storage room for a long time, he called out his little daughter's treasure hunting behavior and went to the kitchen to help his uncle's milk.
Chu Xiaoxiao found nothing, she couldn't help but sighed, looking at the blank memorial book in front of her, lying on the table without soul.
She looked left and right wearily, and suddenly found the grandma on the sofa, who was ignorantly wandering, not knowing what she was thinking.
Grandma can't hear the sound now, and often can't speak. She will have to sleep before long, and she has been half asleep and half awake, just like an unconscious little baby in a swaddle.
Her eyes are already a little cloudy, but they are confused and innocent, always quietly living in her own world.
"Grandma! Grandma!"
Chu Xiaoxiao didn't want to give up, she waved her hands desperately again, trying to attract the attention of the old lady, "I want to be a memorial book for my brother and mother, does grandma have any material?"
The old lady was attracted by Chu Xiaoxiao's small hands, she slowly looked at the little girl, and stared at the other person blankly.
Chu Xiaoxiao simply picked up the memorial book on the table, she showed expectant eyes, and said patiently: "Grandma, look at this! I want to do this!"
The old lady stared at the memorial book blankly, staring at the memorial book with immature handwriting for a long time.
Chu Xiaoxiao held his breath, hoping that grandma could respond, but after a long wait, she only saw grandma grinning, and the other party was immersed in her daze.
Chu Xiaoxiao was suddenly disappointed, as she used to communicate with grandma in the same way.
Grandma occasionally grinned, but she was also like an unconscious little baby who didn't know what others were saying.
"Xiao Xiao washes his hands and eats."
Chu Jiadong got out of the kitchen, he walked to the sofa to help his grandma, and said with a smile, "Come and come, I'll also take my mother to dinner."
Grandma Chu Zhen now needs the support of others to walk, she can't walk a few steps herself, and she needs a wheelchair for long-distance movement.
Chu Jiadong supported her mother as usual. She seemed to be a little tired in the middle of walking. She suddenly stretched out her hand to lean on the drawer that passed by, and gasped gently.
Chu Jiadong smiled and said, "Tired?
Then let's take a break. "
Chu Jiadong patiently waited for his mother to rest for a while. He wanted to help her move to the side of the dining table, but found that the other party was holding on to the drawer door, standing still in a daze.
He only acted as a mother and started to wander off again, carefully trying to break her hand, and persuaded: "Mom, it's time to eat, let's get to the table..."
Chu Jiadong finally coaxed his grandma away, but Chu Xiaoxiao looked at the drawer, but her heart moved. Suddenly she had a strange premonition and she slipped to the drawer to check it.
She pulled the drawer hard, but the old wooden drawer didn't move at all, it seemed to be stuck tightly, and she was panting with exhaustion.
Fortunately, my uncle came to the rescue in time. She was obviously very strong, and she pulled the drawer open all at once, revealing the cowhide envelope and debris in it!
"Wow, it's so big, Xiao Xiao, go and wash your hands!"
Uncle Nai looked at the dust flying in the sky, she immediately frowned and waved her hand, trying to drive away these evil elves.
Chu Xiaoxiao couldn't wait to open the cowhide envelope. She found a thick pile of photos inside, and the dates on the outside of the cowhide envelope were different.
She looked familiar with the face in the photo and recognized her mother Xiao Bi accurately, and the others had to distinguish it for a while.
On the way home, Chu Xiaoxiao returned home happily. She thought that her diary of confusing human studies had made great progress, and that the past of the cheap brother was actually picked up by her!
As Chu Jiadong drove seriously, he smiled and sighed with emotion: "I really found a lot of things today, Xiao Xiao don't lose the little black films, they are all film."
Chu Xiaoxiao held the long black film, and she dangled it curiously: "What is this for?"
Chu Jiadong: "You can use it to wash photos, but now it's stored electronically, so it's basically useless."
These are all the photographing methods that Chu Xiaoyi used in childhood. Chu Xiaoxiao has never seen film since she was born. She is a generation who came into contact with IPAD at a young age and has no concept of previous electronic products.
The cowhide envelopes in the drawers all contained photos. The date on the outside seemed to be the release time of the photo studio. Many photos were older than Chu Xiaoxiao.
Adults have forgotten the past, and now they look up old photos and often feel emotion. In the past, they became beautiful and flawless under the filters of the years. Chu Jiadong and others provided Chu Xiaoxiao with a wealth of materials.
Chu Xiaoxiao looked at the cheap brother's baby photo with a disgusting look on her face, and vomited: "He was crumpled when he was a child, and he didn't look good at all."
Chu Jiadong was weak and weak: "Xiao Xiao, you didn't look good when you were born..." He has stored baby pictures of his little daughter, but she has not seen it personally.
Chu Xiaoxiao became much more relaxed afterwards. As long as she picked up a photo and asked "what is this?", the three adults would rack their brains and think about it. They tried to recall the details against the date and answer her confusion.
As a human cub, she seemed to open the door to a new world, feeling that her brother and her were living on two planets.
She doesn't understand what MP3 is, and the big brother and big mobile phone, let alone the four things that the old man suddenly mentioned.
She listened to the adult's explanation in a haze, like a passerby who strayed into a meal circle, and did not understand their black words at all.
Fortunately, her ability to generalize is not bad. If she doesn't understand, delete all of it first, leaving only the parts of her brother and mother.
Chu Xiaoxiao finally completed the first volume of the souvenir book. She was afraid that her mother would find out that she had published a book for her brother, and she also deliberately imitated the cheap brother's voice, in order to achieve the effect of being fake.
On Xiao Bi's birthday, Chu Jiadong decided to have a good meal at home, and he also deliberately left his gifts last so that the eldest son and younger daughter could express their hearts first.
Xiao Bi looked at the scene of the reunion of a family of four. The gentle smile on her face had not disappeared, and she seemed contented.
Chu Xiaoyi returned in a hurry. He finally did not miss his mother's birthday. He walked up to Xiao Bi with his sister and started the gift-giving process.
Chu Xiaoxiao glanced at her elder brother secretly, she deliberately coughed twice, and solemnly said: "My brother and I will make a souvenir book for my mother."
With a smile on Xiao Bi's face, he said softly: "Okay, thank you!"
The next second, Chu Xiaoxiao and Chu Xiaoyi took out the souvenir book at the same time. The only difference was that she had two copies in her hand and he only had one.
The two brothers and sisters looked at each other in shock, but Chu Xiaoxiao trembled: "You, you clearly said..."
Chu Xiaoyi also looked confused: "Why do you have two volumes?"
Chu Xiaoxiao was completely stunned by the cheap brother's show operation. He clearly said that he couldn't make a souvenir book. She was afraid that he would not make it through the skylight, so she personally made up a book for him. After a long time, he made it again?
!
Chu Xiaoxiao wanted to penetrate Chu Xiaoyi with a laser-like sight. She was like an unreliable team member during group work. She never knew what the other party would do. He had no concept of communicating progress.
She was afraid that asking about the memorial book would make her brother sad, so she didn't dare to take the initiative to speak.
Chu Xiaoyi was also a little embarrassed. He really couldn't think of happy memories, but he thought about it carefully. Perhaps the pain is also memorable.
He has always avoided trauma. He always feels that the days are getting better now, and the pains of the past need not be mentioned again, but he doesn't want the pustules that have not been broken will never be healed.
It will be very sore and painful for him to recall the past, but if he does not thoroughly see it through, the gloomy memories will be meaningless and will only leave a gloomy effect.
His commemorative album is not about happiness, but more about reflection and self-blame. He used his 25-year-old eyes to look at his fifteen- or six-year-old things, and suddenly realized a lot of things that he didn't understand back then.
When he was fifteen or sixteen years old, he felt that the whole world was sorry for himself, and he could only see that his parents treated him badly, but he would not do this again when he was twenty-five. He had already touched the boundaries of adult ability.
He was aware of the difficulties in the outside world. He found that everyone was an ordinary person, including his parents.
He has been thinking about these lately, and he didn't complete the memorial book until this morning, and he forgot to inform his sister.
When Xiao Bi saw her children staring at each other in shock, she was puzzled: "What's the matter?"
Chu Xiaoxiao reacted very quickly. She immediately picked up the watercolor pen on the table and changed the "Volume One" in her hand to the "Book Two", and said sternly: "Excuse me, there is a problem with the cover design, and it has been dealt with now. ."
Chu Xiaoyi hesitated: "...what is this middle volume?"
Chu Xiaoyi: Is it possible that Xueba does his homework and changes his mind at the first glance, suddenly adding content?
Chu Xiaoxiao didn't want to show her stuff in front of her mother, she blinked desperately at her brother, and said in a panic: "This is your happy memory, don't you remember it?"
Chu Xiaoyi didn't understand the small things' eye signals at all, so he questioned in surprise, "Where do I have happy memories?"
Seeing him stubbornly stubborn, Chu Xiaoxiao collapsed and jumped on the spot twice, feeling that she and her brother had no tacit understanding at all, like an angry little pinball.
Chu Xiaoyi looked at her like a little rabbit kicking her legs frantically, and he became more suspicious: "What is the middle volume you did?"
When Chu Xiaoxiao heard him directly blew himself up and revealed that the second volume was made by her, he finally fell on the sofa dejectedly and helplessly, really unable to bring the cheap brother.
She was paralyzed without a soul, and fell into self-defeating herself, like a small withered flower.
Xiao Bi couldn't help looking at her little daughter's performance, and said gently: "Then let's take a look at the middle volume first."
Chu Xiaoxiao watched the book without heart, she was still autistic in the corner.
Chu Xiaoyi and Xiao Bi looked curiously, while Chu Jiadong watched from a distance, and they admired the contents of the souvenir book.
Chu Xiaoyi's gaze followed the page browsing. He looked at the familiar old photos in the middle volume and exclaimed: "Where did this all come from?"
Chu Xiaoyi couldn't remember his childhood at all. He looked at the little boy in the photo as both familiar and unfamiliar, and he didn't realize who it was for a long time.
He looked at his own baby photo, produced the same evaluation as his sister, and said with his eyebrows: "How wrinkled it is, it's not pretty at all."
Chu Jiadong was weak again: "Xiao Yi, you didn't look good when you were born..."
Xiao Bi's mouth burst into a smile, and said calmly: "You two looked good when you were born. Some children were like little monkeys when they were born."
Chu Xiaoyi stared at the commemorative album and was stunned. The first volume he produced was related to his own sorrow, reflection and repentance. The second volume produced by his younger sister was really his happy memory, but he was about to forget it.
These memories are usually like sinking to the bottom of the water, only when the heavy rock hits it will they turn to the surface, otherwise there will be no traces.
Of course, there are many misinterpretations of Chu Xiaoxiao in the memorial book to discredit. Chu Xiaoyi hugged the sister who grows mushrooms in the corner. He pointed to the text next to the photo, and said with a smile: "Come, come, come, Explain to me, what does this sentence mean?"
This is a photo of Chu Xiaoyi at the entrance of the elementary school, with the text "I am going to elementary school today, and my handsomeness shocked the school".
This line of Chinese is still crooked and crooked. Chu Xiaoxiao can write well in English, but when encountering Chinese characters with many strokes, her control has declined.
Chu Xiaoxiao blinked, pretending to be silly, and said, "This is your own words, how can I explain it?"
Chu Xiaoyi couldn't help squeezing her small face, and said with an aura and amusement: "When did I say such a silly thing?
! "
Chu Xiaoyi: You actually took the lead in spreading rumors, am I so naive?
Chu Xiaoxiao muttered in a dull voice: "You usually talk like this..."
Chu Xiaoxiao: What I imitated is obviously the essence, you still dare not admit it?
Chu Xiaoxiao felt that his ghostwriter was foolproof. He used to tell her every day "your brother is so handsome, you don't understand", "your brother is so many fans, you don't understand".
She thinks that the cheap brother is narcissistic and proud, and she does not think that her writing is suspected of breaking down.
Chu Jiadong and Xiao Bi were amused by the brothers and sisters. Xiao Bi suddenly said with emotion: "Actually, Xiao Xiao didn't make a mistake. You came back from elementary school on the first day and suddenly said to me during dinner,'Mom, I think I am The best-looking person in the school', you amused your grandma."
Chu Jiadong echoed: "Yes, I have heard of this too."
Chu Xiaoyi was shocked, he still had such brazen years, it was hard to believe for a while: "?
! "
Chu Xiaoxiao got the testimony of her parents. She immediately jumped up from her brother's arms, raised her head and stood on the sofa, raising her chin seriously, and said seriously: "Please don't doubt my research ability, I am very Strictly, check the literature for reference!"
Chu Xiaoyi: "..." What kind of literature can I consult for your research?
!
The dinner was completely spent in a joyful atmosphere. Chu Xiaoyi never expected that he had so much dark childhood history, all of which were exposed by the old photos of his sister, Xiao Bi and Chu Jiadong even treasured them.
Every time Chu Xiaoxiao heard a silly thing about her brother, she also glanced at him proudly, hinting with her eyes that her academic research ability is super strong, and there is absolutely no fraudulent element.
For a time, Chu Xiaoyi wanted to find a way to get in. He only became angry when he listened to the innocent version of anecdotes, and he secretly sighed why he had such a stupid stage.
However, Xiao Bi seemed to be in a good mood. She was very happy throughout the whole process, and she rarely talked a lot about the past.
At the end of the lively birthday dinner, Chu Jiadong went to the kitchen to wash the dishes, and Chu Xiaoxiao also slipped back to the room to rest, leaving only Xiao Bi and Chu Xiaoyi in the living room.
Chu Xiaoyi secretly looked at the mother who flipped through the memorial book. He felt that there were not so many happy things in his first book, which I am afraid it would be much sadder.
However, Xiao Bi was very calm when reading. She turned through the three memorial books with a smile, and carefully put them aside, looking stable.
She has rarely had a stage of great joy and anger, and she is always a gentle and quiet person.
Chu Xiaoyi pondered for a few seconds, then suddenly said, "Mom, can I help you?"
Xiao Bi was taken aback when she heard the words, she hesitated for a moment, then chuckled lightly: "Well... Actually, you don't need to do anything for me."
Chu Xiaoyi lowered his eyes slightly, he moved his gaze aside with a guilty conscience, and finally couldn't help asking: "...Why did you want to give birth to me?"
This is Chu Xiaoyi's long-standing doubt. If he knows the reason his mother gave birth to him, he can know what the other party wants and understand Xiao Bi's needs.
When Xiao Bi faced the question from her elder son, she thought about it for a moment and replied: "Because your dad and I thought this was a miraculous thing at the time."
Chu Xiaoyi said blankly: "Magic?"
Xiao Bi smiled and said: "Yes, we will disappear into this world sooner or later, but you and Xiao Xiao will live with our traces. You may be like us, or you may not be like us at all. Isn’t this amazing?"
"So you don't have to do anything for me, your existence will help us a lot."
Xiao Bi looked up at the top in a dream, and she thoughtfully said, "You may not understand this feeling now. Only when you have your own children can you truly experience it.
We seem to be the same, and it seems that we are completely different, and we can only describe it by magic. "
Chu Xiaoyi did not understand his mother's statement at all. He bowed his head and said in frustration: "But I used to make you angry."
Xiao Bi shook her head, and she gently said, "Xiao Yi, although you and Xiao Xiao are not copies of me and your dad, many times the traits in your body are derived from us, and I sometimes recall a lot of the past. Thing, reflect on how I got along with you at that time..."
"Xiao Xiao is good at expressing and exuding his personality. In fact, some of it originated from your dad. I often think about whether your personality follows me, so I am more sensitive.
If my character is better, will you become more relaxed now and be better at communicating with others? "
Xiao Bi lowered her head slightly. She has been thinking about the root cause of past contradictions and reflecting on whether she has made mistakes in the growth of her elder son.
Her always introverted character may infect her son subtly and have a certain catalytic effect on him.
Chu Xiaoyi heard his mother presumptuously, and he immediately got a little bit sore, and whispered in a low voice, "Mom, you are good enough."
Xiao Bi was already a perfect model mother, Chu Xiaoyi couldn't ask her any more, so naturally he didn't want to see her low.
Xiao Bi sighed softly when she heard the words, she smiled relievedly, and said: "Then you are good enough, and you should believe this too."
"Xiao Yi, if you think I am good enough, then you must be good enough. Since we are a mother and son, you should believe this even more."
There was a soft light in her eyes, and she looked at her elder son gently and firmly, which made Chu Xiaoyi startled.
They have the same but different shadows, like a magical and changing mirror separated by a mirror, with parents and children on both sides of the mirror.
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