The Black Swan Behind

107 It’s Okay

Kathy and Poppy shook their heads together with smiles. They already knew that Emma Hilland was that kind to her best friend. She was the type of girl who was willing to do a lot for the people she liked. And of course, they didn’t want to take advantage of Emma’s extravagant kindness.

“Let’s go home, Emma. It’s getting late. Our homes are far from here. I’m also feeling sleepy already.” Kathy grabbed Emma’s arm and dragged her out of the store.

“You sleepy at this hour?” Emma looked confused as she walked with two girls embracing her on the right and left.

“Did you forget? Last night, Kathy didn’t sleep because of the competition?” Poppy asked.

“Oh, right, I forgot about that,” Emma answered.

“Ah.. Today is an awesome day..” exclaimed Kathy, who was sitting in the car’s back passenger seat.

Emma who was putting on her seatbelt, nodded in agreement. It seemed that she never stopped smiling today. It turned out that hanging out with the girls was so fun, “When will we be able to go out like this again? When do you guys have time again?” Emma asked hopefully. It Looked like she was getting addicted.

“Oh.. I’m sorry, Emma. My mom and I happened to be staying at my Grandma’s house to spend this holiday.” Poppy who was sitting in the chair next to her, answered with a regretful face.

“Me too, Emma. My whole family going on an out of state trip.” Kathy added.

.....

“Oh.. It’s okay then.” Emma answered by shaking one palm of her hand, trying to look cheered up.

“By the way, Emma.. Don’t you have a family event? Aren’t you going to your dad’s house?” Poppy asked.

“Hm? Oh.. That’s.. My dad happens to be very busy. He holds an important position in his job that makes him not have time for family. Since kids, my siblings and I were not close to my dad.” Emma explained by starting the car engine. Then, the car started to drive across the road with a view of snow piles on the right and left.

“So, you’re going to stay here alone for the holidays, Emma?” Kathy asked with pity.

Emma nodded, trying to put a smile on her face, “I’m ok. I came to Handway City for a new vibe, anyway. Since I haven’t been here long, it still feels like a vacation.” She answered.

Poppy looked sadly at Emma who was driving. Emma who noticed Poppy was staring at her like that, smirked in surprise, “What?”

“We didn’t ask if you were okay or not, Emma.” Poppy answered slowly.

“Emma.. You always help us. So, if you have a problem.. or at least want to have a talk with us, you can do it anytime. Don’t hold yourself back and cover it with that smile and always say that you’re okay.” Kathy said while perched between the two front seats.

Hearing Kathy and Poppy’s words made Emma’s chest throb. Her eyes felt warm from the strange feeling. She hated it but loved it. She liked how her two friends cared about her so much, but hated how her heart reacted to it.

“It seems like it’s been too long since the circumstances have made me try to appear strong, that I think it’s just my nature,” Emma mumbled.

“If you keep pushing your limit, it’s going to be bad for you in the end, Emma,” Kathy said.

“Just like what I’ve been experienced with you guys. It feels very different when I’ve found the right friends. Maybe, even if I reveal all my deepest secrets to you all, then I won’t be afraid. Because, it’s you.” Poppy smiled as facing down slightly.

“Girls.. Honestly.. I..” Emma stopped. Then, she glanced at Poppy and Kathy who were looking at her curiously, “I..”

“I.. I actually have.. Eum.. Phobia. Yes, that’s right.. I have a phobia of not having friends.” Emma continued. Her heart was pounding because she had almost decided to reveal her big secret to the two girls. But suddenly, Emma had doubts and ended up only telling one percent of her big secret.

“Really?” Kathy replied with a confused face.

“Honestly, I also have that kind of fear. But.. It’s a bit strange for a perfect girl like you to have that kind of fear.” Poppy muttered.

“Perfect? ??I’m far from perfect, Poppy. Actually, since I was little, I didn’t have friends because my parents always restrained me. Therefore, when I was separated from my dad’s support, I realized that I had difficulties in socializing, and that made me feel afraid of not having one friend.” This time Emma was telling the truth. Then, she sighed, “I don’t even know that my attitude, which you might think is good, was because of the fear of being not having friends or not.” She continued slowly.

“Gosh Emma.. I understand you must be very confused..” Poppy rubbed the girl’s shoulder.

“Let alone other people, even, we are actually still having trouble knowing ourselves, Emma. It’s natural for you to feel confused now. But don’t let that thing makes you always think negatively of yourself.” Kathy suggested.

Poppy nodded confirming Kathy’s words, “I’m sure that kindness really comes from your true nature, Emma. Doing good things isn’t easy for someone with a dirty heart. If you do all of this with joy in your heart, then that is your nature.”

“I.. is that so?” Emma muttered, looking thoughtful.

“Now I’m going to ask you one thing, Emma. When you helped Poppy, when you always cheer me up, and even drive us home one by one like this, did you feel compelled?” Kathy asked. Then, got a head shake from Emma.

“Then, you don’t need to be confused anymore because you have found the answer.” Kathy continued by patting Emma’s shoulder.

Finally, Emma giggled in understanding, “Okey. I get it now. Anyways, how about some music to chill things up?” she pressed the tape button.

“Nice! I’ve been longed to have karaoke,” Kathy replied in excitement.

Emma dropped Poppy and Kathy at their houses. Previously, because it was too late at night, Emma forbade the two girls who said that they wanted to go home alone using public transportation. Emma was worried that something dangerous would happen to her two best friends. The reason was, she was now more familiar with the crimes that were usually happened on the streets of Handway City.

***

A pair of wrinkled hands with several tattoos engraved, seen counting the shabby money. He sat at a small round table with a slightly rusted iron folding chair.

When he finished counting, he put the money, which was combined with rubber bands with ten bundles in total, into a black plastic bag. In front of him, was a man with fire bright red hair who was enjoying chewing peanuts.

“Ok, You done?” Asked the red-haired man.

The man who looked almost hit his elderly age, nodded as he shifted the bag in front of the man.

“Watch out.. The peanut shells will fall to the floor.” The red-haired man hastily covered the edge of the table with his palms.

“Oh.. Sorry. My eyes are not paying attention.” The tattooed man laughed a little. His name was Albert. A tall man with dim blue eyes with tattoos covered his wrinkled body skin.

“Of course, your eyes are getting blurry. You need to change the lights in this room, Albert.” Answered the red-haired man while holding a glimpse of the lamp cover made of iron that had started to rust as well.

“Nah.. It’s been like that for a long time. This place will lose its identity if everything is too clean.” Albert answered as he got up to pick up the trash can.

“What are you doing, old man?” The man looked at Albert who was now handing the trash can to him.

“This is for your peanut shells, stupid.”

“Oh.. I can throw it myself. There’s no need to treat me like that. If Marcel saw it, he might beat me up for being disrespectful to elders.” The redhead complained.

Albert laughed at that rudeness. His laughter really described an old man who sounded heavy and slow, “Yeah.. He’s the only one who can be rude to anyone, including elders. But.. isn’t the boss always selfish like that?”

The read-haired man shrugged his shoulders as he continued to eat the few remaining peanuts. He intended to leave after finishing the peanut, “Of course, you know him, old man.”

Albert let out a long sigh while shrugging. A cigarette was already stuck between his fingers which he took a deep sip before blowing the smoke out, “Time flies so fast. I can’t believe I have a new boss that looks like a mommy’s boy.”

“Hey, Albert.. You better watch your word. You’re always being rude just because of your old age. Even though he’s much younger than you, he’s still your boss.” Reprimand the red-haired man who had finally finished with his peanuts.

“Everyone already knows what I’m like this. You’re the only one who’s fussy. Even your boss doesn’t mind the way I talk.” Albert turned his back.

“Hah! Such an annoying old man! What a nerve! If you were as young as me, I would have punched that pointy nose of yours!” The boy babbled while clearing the table from the scattered peanut shells.

“You try. Marcel will defend me later.” The old man replied by blowing his thick cigarette smoke at the short-haired boy whose hair was dyed a tacky red.

“You fuc...”

“Damian! What took you so long?” Another man with chocolate skin and thick black eyebrows and hair opened the door of the small gloomy room.

“Look at the behaviour of this cockroach, Renu. He’s messing up at my place.” Albert pointed to the small table beside him.

Renu looked tired of it, and subconsciously moved his eyebrows while sighing, “Hurry up, Damian. We still have a lot of work to do.”