The Black Swan Behind

160 Loss of Identity

“Hey! Who you think...”

“The small park near Rose Bus stop in fifteen minutes. If you don’t come, I’ll report you to the police.” Levi cut Emma’s complaint casually and hung up the call unilaterally.

“Levi! Wait..” Emma removed her phone from her ear and looked at the screen that had returned to the main menu. “You jerk..” she mumbled annoyed.

Although she was mad, Emma ended up in her car. With her mouth kept growling, she drove the car towards a children’s playground and park near Rose bus stop in her housing area. There, she saw a familiar dark blue car. She felt like she wanted to hit the car, but of course, that would get her in another trouble.

In the rather dark park, could be seen a man sitting on a swing with his long legs bent. After closing the car door and locking it, Emma stepped lazily over to the man in the light brown coat.

“What do you want?” Emma asked directly.

Levi, who had been busy with his cellphone, immediately locked its screen and put it in his pocket while raising his face at the girl who was standing beside him. He chuckled when he realized Emma’s face was pouting, “Would you make that face when you’re apologizing to someone?”

Emma rolled her eyes, “The problem is that I know what kind of person you are, even though you are a ‘someone’.”

“Sit down,” He pointed his chin at the hanging swing next to him.

.....

“No,” Emma said sarcastically giving a face of disapproval. Who was he to command her? He didn’t know that Emma was a girl who didn’t take orders.

Levi snorted as he stood up. Then he grabbed Emma’s shoulders and forced her to sit down.

“Hey!” Emma pushed Levi’s hands away.

“What’s so hard about sitting there? Why are you so stubborn?” Levi asked by pressing Emma’s shoulder so that she sat on the swing. “What do you think I would do by asking you to sit there?”

Emma looked at Levi sarcastically, “You idiot.” she muttered, while the man sat back down on the other swing. Then, Emma slowly turned her face because the corner of her eye saw something floating beside her head.

It was an instant cup noodle whose steam slightly billowed upwards from between the lids. Emma blinked a few times before looking back at Levi who was handing the white-blue glass-shaped object to her.

“Looking at it like that, won’t help the food keep warm,” Levi said.

With a hesitant motion, Emma took the thing. She saw the grey-eyed man was already busy with the other cup noodles he was holding. It turned out that Levi had already prepared all of these.

“What do you mean?” Emma asked quietly, looking at the thing that was now in her lap. She opened the cup noodle lid wider until the steam was getting up bigger. So annoyed earlier, Emma didn’t realize that Levi was carrying the two foods with him.

“What do you mean by asking what I mean? Obviously, I gave you food,” He answered by unfolding the fork that he had previously taken out of the noodle cup package. Then he used it to stir the noodles which had slightly overcooked.

Emma was still silent, “It seems I’ve become a person who thinks too much of myself lately.” she muttered.

Levi glanced at her, “At least you can talk while you eat that thing before it gets cold.”

Emma sighed and unfolded her fork before started stirring her cup noodles. Slowly, she sipped the noodle soup. Ah.. it was so good and helped her mood get better.

Levi silently watched Emma with a faint smile. It was true that women’s moods would get much better if they eat something delicious. It seemed like pleasing the noisy creature’s heart wasn’t that hard. Their satisfaction was actually that simple when compared to the men.

“I bought this because, at that time, I made you throw away the cup noodles you were eating by the river,” Levi explained.

Emma looked at him with raised eyebrows, “Oh.. So you noticed it, huh? I thought you didn’t care at all,”

“I saw it. But I really didn’t care about it at the time. But when I saw this food when I went to the mini market, I thought that maybe you need this kind of food now.” He said while thinking to himself. Actually, he also couldn’t believe why he suddenly thought of buying the cup noodles for Emma.

“What is your purpose in bringing me here, actually?” Emma asked as she ate with an unenthusiastic motion.

“I just happened to come back from a friend’s house around this area. Suddenly, I remembered the criminal who had damaged my car but has been disappeared without any information. So I tried to contact her to teach her a little lesson.” He replied casually while eating.

Emma could only stare at Levi with a straight face, “Hey. I already apologized to you, didn’t I? I didn’t hit your car on purpose. It was an accident.”

“I don’t think anyone would intentionally commit a crime. They must have had a reason for doing it.” Levi said.

“Whatever you say,” Emma replied. “Then, how’s Nancy?”

Levi nodded, “She is fine. She came home a few weeks ago because she was constantly worried about her cat.”

“She is? Good to hear it. I’m glad to know she’s well now.” Emma smiled.

But Levi didn’t seem to care about her empathy because he had other intentions, “I told her that you were planning to come. She was very happy and waiting for you. But I think I’ll tell her not to hoping anymore,”

“Are you trying to make me feel guilty again?” Emma asked with a cynical stare.

Levi laughed amusedly, “You know what? In my eyes, you always give a very funny response.”

Because laughing while eating, Levi then choked. He coughed and hurriedly took a bottle of water which he placed on a short wall that fenced off the bushes beside him. It turned out that he had put all the food on it.

“Eat that. I hope one of the noodles stings goes into your lungs.” Emma mocked with a laugh.

As soon as Levi finished gulping down the water in the bottle to half-empty, he then looked at Emma while shaking his head in disbelief, “I already knew that you were a demon in an angel costume.”

“You provoked me,” Emma replied.

“Here,” It turned out that Levi had already handed Emma a new bottle of water.

Emma took the water, “Thank you.”, and immediately took a few gulps. Her throat was already a bit uncomfortable from earlier.

“That’s good,” Levi said suddenly. The food he had had was finished and he put it back on the wall beside him to throw it away later.

Emma turned to Levi with a confused face, “What is good?”

“Your voice has changed again. It’s become normal.”

Hearing Levi’s answer, Emma fell silent. Finally, she realized that the feeling of despair in her heart had disappeared. From there, she also realized that Levi’s real purpose for having her come to this small park was not to mess with her, but to make her feel better. Even though Levi’s way was annoying, he managed to cheer Emma up.

“Aren’t you going to be home too late?” Emma broke the silence.

Levi looked up at the sky, which was clear enough for the moon to be clearly seen, “I’ve done it too many times. It seems that I can’t tell the difference between night and day anymore.”

“I guess.. we both have a rather tough life, but were smart enough to cover it up,” Emma muttered as she looked up as well, staring at the same moon. That was indeed beautiful.

“Only a magician can read other magicians’ tricks,” Levi replied.

“I’m so confused, Levi. I feel lost because of the problems I’ve been facing. I feel like I don’t recognize myself anymore.” Emma said, staring at her empty noodle cup.

“Well.. Honestly, I’ve ever been in the same condition.”

Emma looked at Levi, “You ever?”

The man nodded once then looked up at the sky as he rocked his swing seat until the metal chains sound creaked, “It’s been a long time. But that incident made me who I am today. For me, losing my identity is a process to maturity.”

Emma seemed very interested in Levi’s story this time, “Then what did you do?”

“If you lose yourself, you just have to find it again. Be lost just only to be found.” He answered.

“How to?” Emma asked again.

“You’ll only know how, once you’ve found it. In other words, the answer lies within you.” Levi answered without stopping looking at the moon which seemed to be watching him too.

“Err.. you’re not helping at all, Levi.” Emma sighed.

“Your problem would never be solved if you keep expecting someone else to solve it. The only one who can help you is yourself. Just like your question before, I’m sure you already have the answer, but you just don’t trust yourself.” Levi lowered his gaze and looked directly at Emma.

The two light brown eyes could only stare at two sharp eyes whose irises seemed to reflect the moonlight. Emma’s brow furrowed, “Are you a wizard?”

Levi instantly chuckled, “If it really exists, I would. I happen to like cursing people.”

Emma didn’t expect Levi’s words to shock her again. It looked like Emma was really going to put a label on him as ‘Jonas Junior’. It seemed Levi Wargos could easily read Emma, ??just like Jonas who had been her bodyguard since she was little. Both men were annoying, but somehow very wise.

Exactly as Levi said, Emma actually already knew that she had to accept Marcel’s offer so that her mission could be successful. However, she was too afraid and doubtful.