The Black Swan Behind

240 End it

“Hello,” Emma greeted, trying to be as friendly as possible.

“Are you busy?” Levi asked directly.

“I’m on my way somewhere. I’m in the car.” Emma answered, didn’t even give a reply question.

“If I wanted to see you for a while, would it bother you?”

“I..”

“Well, I know it must be bothering you. Why am I still asking? Haha..” Levi cut in again before Emma could answer. But he didn’t hear Emma say anything. It made him have to go back to his sentence, “I’m a selfish man, Emma. I would still ask you to spare a little of your time although knowing that you would be annoyed.”

Emma let out a long sigh. Every time she heard Levi’s voice sound like that, she would never be able to contain her curious feeling about what was going on with him. However, should the two of them continue like this? Even Emma began to think that perhaps she was being used by Levi.

“All right, Levi. I’ll make time for you. It happens that I also have something to tell you.” Emma answered. “At Café xx at 6 p.m. How about it?”

“That’s fine. I’ll be waiting for you there.” Levi answered.

.....

Then Emma hung up the phone. She took another deep breath and exhaled long before driving the car back to her destination.

After finishing all her business at headquarters, Emma immediately went to Café XX as promised. After about fifteen minutes of drive, the car arrived in front of a classic vintage-style building. Through its large window, Emma could see a man sitting alone at a table on the second floor.

Emma entered the café, ordered a drink and walked up the stairs to the second floor. She saw Levi who was staring silently at the large window beside him.

“I don’t think I am late,” Emma said as she pulled the chair in front of Levi for her to sit.

Levi turned to the girl with loose, light-brown hair which was a little longer than the last he remembered. His dark red lips instantly curved into a smile as he glanced at his watch. “Pretty unusual. What do you want to drink?”

Emma shook her head with a faint smile, “I already ordered. Maybe the waiter will come to deliver it soon.”

“Oh,” Levi answered.

After the brief conversation, the two of them were both silents. For some reason, the atmosphere became very awkward. It was funny because the two of them were so close at last time they met. But it seemed that the uncomfortable feeling Emma felt was so strong that it affected the atmosphere around them.

“What..” The awkwardness grew even more when the two of them even tried to start talking at the same time.

They laughed. At that time, a waiter came to bring Emma’s drink. But before he left, Levi held him back and ordered a slice of Blueberry Pie.

After the waiter left, Levi let out a long sigh before taking a sip of his Espresso. “Well.. Why is it so awkward? Don’t you feel it? I think this atmosphere comes from you.” He said, trying to be his usual self.

In all his life, Levi had never felt awkward in front of other people. He never cared about other people’s feelings. If he was interested, then he would talk. If he wasn’t, then he would be silent. That was how simple he was.

But only for this girl named Emma Hilland, it seemed that he didn’t recognize himself anymore. Every aura that the girl gave off easily affected his feelings.

“You want to say something, don’t you? Should I use the term ‘Ladies first’?” Levi asked.

“I think so,” Emma nodded before taking a sip of her Matcha Latte. “It’s actually not so serious, Levi. I just wanted to tell you that maybe we won’t be seeing each other very often.”

Levi raised an eyebrow. “Don’t we really don’t see each other often?”

That was right. What was Emma thinking exactly? Honestly, she was feeling a little nervous right now.

The girl cleared her throat to cover her nervousness. “I mean, I might not get to see you again every time you ask me to.”

“Are you that busy?” Levi asked.

Emma nodded slowly. “I think so.”

“But why do I feel like there’s another reason? Are you, perhaps, trying to avoid me?” Levi asked in a slightly joking tone to prevent Emma from feeling offended.

“I’m not avoiding you. I just feel that...” Emma thought for a moment to find the right words. Her eyes looked up as she continued, “there are enough things to take priority over this.”

Levi furrowed his brow. His face looked thoughtful to draw a conclusion. “So, you mean; there are many more important things than me?”

“Um...” Emma gave a doubtful face before nodding. “It’s kind of,”

“Well,” Levi nodded then giggled. “I didn’t expect to be that important to you either.”

Emma smiled, “That’s a relief.”

Then Levi’s giggle faded slowly. They were silent again for a few minutes until the waiter came back with Levi’s order: A slice of warm Blueberry Pie with a delightfully crispy crust.

Levi gestured his hand towards the girl in front of him briefly. The waiter understood, and put the pie in front of Emma.

“That’s for you. I thought you liked pie,” Levi said after seeing Emma’s confused face.

Emma stared at the pie for a few seconds. What the man did make her feel a dilemma. Why would the little things that Emma often received from other men feel so special when it was Levi Wargos who did them for her?

“Thanks,” Emma said kindly after gathering her sanity back. “Let’s see how it tastes,” she said before cutting the small piece of the Pie.

Levi stared at Emma as if she were a view of the green fields and mountains which refreshed his eyes that were too tired to see the bustle and pollution of the city. Even more, his lips unconsciously curled into a smile.

“Is it as good as the pie you shared with me?” Levi asked.

“Hm?” Emma looked at the man. Oh.. he still remembered it, apparently.

Emma smiled faintly. “Feels to be almost the same taste. But my friend’s grandmother’s is a little better,” she explained.

“At least you seem to like it,” Levi said with both eyes still attached to the girl whose every behaviour made him chuckle.

“Why don’t you order for yourself too?” Emma asked.

But Levi shook his head. “I’m cutting back on sweets.”

“You are?” Emma’s tone was condescending. “Your blood sugar has gone up? Would you at least give this a try?” she pointed the pie plate at Levi.

Levi shook his head with a faint smile. “I won’t eat even one bite. I just realized that I like sweetness. Therefore, I will stop eating it.”

Emma frowned in confusion. “If your blood sugar is normal and you like sweetness, then why are you avoiding it so badly?”

“Sweets makes me happy. I’m afraid my stock of happiness will run out just for sweets. It’s a shame because I want to spend it on things more important than just food.”

“What kind of bullshit is that?” Emma muttered with an incredulous face.

Levi chuckled. “Eat. If it’s not enough, I’ll order more.”

Although Levi did often say things like nonsense, Emma understood that there was a meaning in those strange sentences. Normally, Emma would have replied with a follow-up question because she could clearly see Levi’s sad face which meant that he was having a lot of problems.

But Emma had already told herself that she could no longer do this. Although she had thought that their relationship was an interesting and funny thing, it was no longer the same now.

Emma never thought that her heart would grow feelings for Levi. If they continued to do this, then the feeling would only grow bigger. As Poppy said; Emma shouldn’t get caught up in those feelings with the wrong person because it would only end up painfully.

“Levi,” Emma called softly. It was as if all her passion had evaporated into the air until only emptiness remained.

Levi looked at Emma who just kept looking down at her half-bitted pie. It wasn’t that he didn’t feel there was something wrong with Emma. From Emma’s first message reply, Levi immediately realized that the girl was no longer the same. Therefore, he insisted on meeting in person.

“Yes?” The man smiled faintly. But for some reason, his heart began to beat violently.

“When I said I couldn’t just meet you anymore, I really meant it.” Emma raised her face to look at Levi again. “Looks like I can’t be your friend anymore, Levi.”

“What? Why? Did I make a mistake the other day?” Levi asked, trying to be calm.

Emma shook her head. “You didn’t do anything wrong, Levi. I’m the one at fault here. I just feel that our friendship is unhealthy. I just feel like I can’t do this anymore.”

Levi shook his head with a small surprised chuckle. “That.. is a strange reason, I think.”

“What we have been doing is strange from the start, Levi. That’s why I wanted to end it.” Emma said.

“That’s right. Isn’t it because of its strangeness that we do it? Then why do you suddenly want to end it when this strangeness starts to get fun?” He asked.

But Emma immediately shook her head. “No. Unfortunately, you’re the only one who finds this fun.” Then she chuckled. “I’ve always thought that we have quite similar personalities and mindsets. But now I seem to have found the difference.”

“So, you don’t want to see me anymore?” Levi asked in a cold tone. Under the table, his fists clenched hard. He held back his feelings to keep his face.

Emma nodded. “From the first place, we were strangers. I think, even if we don’t see each other anymore, it won’t have a big impact on our lives.”