The Black Swan Behind

78 The Old Shackles

Ian sighed tiredly. He understood how’s Calvin’s feelings, but Troy and Jita Kyoei were his top priority, “I understand, it’s not easy being a hero who’s fighting alone. But I hope you can also respect Troy’s choices. For him, Judo and Jita Kyoei are half of his life. That’s why he can indeed be quite selfish when it comes to that.”

Calvin nodded, “Right. I see.”

Calvin just closed his lips, and Troy came with a face that already looked relaxed. Then, he sat back on his chair near the television.

“So.. Do we need to directly attack all of Hell Gate’s bases or what?” asked the man while taking the game console that was nearby.

Everyone there looked at Troy in disbelief.

“What? You all mind it?” Troy asked innocently. Everyone then nodded together.

“Troy, I actually am sorry if I was too careless. But you don’t have to go along with my wishes if you have other priorities.” Said Calvin.

Hearing Calvin’s statement, Troy immediately laughed mockingly, “What nonsense are you saying? Why would I follow your wishes? From the start, I wanted to finish off the shitty group that has been harassed so many women.”

“Are you serious?” Ian asked with a deep look at Troy.

.....

Troy smiled and patted his best friend’s shoulder, “Have you ever seen me playing with my words?”

He looked at all his friends who shook their heads, answering the question. Then, Troy nodded casually, “Then let’s make a plan.”

‘There’s a debt that I have to pay.’ He continued in his heart.

***

Emma rose her palm in the air. She was wearing all black clothes. Even the scarf she was wearing was the same colour.

For some reason.. at every funeral, the sky was always gloomy and pours drizzle or snow. It was as if it were crying with those who lost their loved ones.

Emma remembered her mother’s funeral. It was also in the winter and the sky was showering everyone’s head with white petals. Unexpectedly, she had to feel the same experience again.

“Emma..”

She turned to the light voice that called out to her. She smiled faintly, “Poppy.”

They had just finished attending Roger’s funeral. His mother and father were seen crying there. Maybe, felt sorry for wasting their only son all this time. Reportedly, Roger’s parents took the case to the police. The two who didn’t know anything about Roger’s life only thought of prosecuting the culprit who killed their son. Yes, Gozu finally got into prison for the next few years.

Emma was very angry. Whereas, in front of her eyes, she witnessed herself that it was Kei Matsumoto who kicked Roger out the window. But, she didn’t have any evidence and she also had to keep herself and Poppy from being caught in the act.

“How are you?” Asked Emma.

Poppy shrugged her shoulders, “I feel like my life is falling apart.” she answered.

Emma just kept silent. She wanted to comfort Poppy, but was afraid she would probably say the wrong thing to her. She herself was holding back tears at the great loss of Roger’s death.

After a moment of silence, Poppy finally spoke up, “Um.. Emma. At that waffle café, you said that I could talk to you when I had a problem, right? Is.. that still apply now?” she forced a grin that only made her face look even more pathetic.

Emma was stunned for a moment to hear Poppy. Then, she immediately nodded and hugged her. Poppy then cried in Emma’s arms.

The two of them sat on a small hill around the burial field which had been covered in white snow. The snow was still falling, but not as much as before. Emma’s hand was still on Poppy’s shoulder who couldn’t hold back the tears that kept flowing.

“Emma.. Maybe you’re confused, why am I crying over Roger like this. Just like everyone, you must think we have no relation, right?” Poppy said by looking straight ahead. Emma was silent. Then, Poppy turned to Emma who was sitting next to her.

“Actually, Roger and I were childhood friends. But.. I did something really bad to him when we were in middle school. Since then, our relationship ended.” she continued.

“R-really?” Emma asked, playing dumb, “If you did have something wrong with him, you don’t have to regret it. Everyone makes mistakes. And I’m sure Roger had forgiven you because he’s a guy with a very big heart.”

Poppy shook her head slowly, “Unfortunately, what I did to him was too evil, Emma. Even I can’t forgive myself. I.. betrayed him and took advantage of his love.”

Emma looked at Poppy questioningly while the girl began to tell her about their very dark past. How a Roger Timothy who was a cheerful child with many friends, changed his life just because of a girl with a devil heart like Poppy Castonia.

How Poppy always denied her own feelings for Roger because she couldn’t overcome her immense fear. Since childhood, Poppy was a timid and weak girl. And that hadn’t changed until now.

“Meeting Roger was the best gift in my life. But I destroyed him very cruelly. In fact... his death... I am.. I am the one who caused Roger to die...” She cried with shaking shoulders.

Emma clenched her fists until they were reddish. Her eyes welled up with tears. It’s a very tragic story. What Poppy had done to Roger was so cruel. Even Emma felt that she perhaps would not be able to forgive her if the story that came out of Poppy’s mouth was true. But Emma tried to put herself together. If Roger, who was the victim, could still forgive and still loved Poppy, why would Emma, ??who had only known them for a few months, dare to judge?

“Poppy.. I don’t know if what I’m saying is true or not. Maybe, I’m a good listener, but I’m not a wise adviser. However, you have to remember one thing. Even until the last second of his life, Roger still loved you very much. Even though your story sounds so cruel, for Roger who lived the life himself, he may had a feeling of satisfaction that others can’t understand. That’s the reason for him to keep strong to protect you. Because of that.. you should respect Roger’s sacrifice by not punishing yourself to the corner.” Emma said.

Poppy stared at Emma for a few seconds before lowering her face with tears dripping on the white snow they were sitting on. She was very sorry. A regret that would haunt her for the rest of her life.

“Your life.. will be very miserable if you love the wrong person.” Poppy said.

If Roger never met Poppy. If he had never fallen in love with her, he would still be alive now. Live a normal life with lots of friends surrounding him.

Emma looked straight ahead. On the white burial field covered with snow. There were many things she still didn’t understand in this world. What were care and love? While living in Handway City, Emma’s eyes were started to open to the real world. How colourful and wavy.

Love was a complicated thing. Something that couldn’t be understood or learned. Something both beautiful and dangerous.

“Jonas.. What is love?” Asked Emma over the phone.

Jonas chuckled, “You’ve been asking a lot of weird questions lately, haven’t you?”

“Just answer according to the movies you’ve watched,” Emma said flatly. After her conversation with Poppy, her mind felt stuck on the strange thing called love.

“Hmm.. Do you know one word that that has no explanation?” Jonas asked.

Emma shook her head, “Is there?”

Jonas chuckled, “Love is a word that has no explanation.”

“Huh?” Emma muttered.

“Now, I’ll return it to you. Explain the meaning of love in theory. Could you?”

Emma was silent for a few seconds before replying, “I.. don’t know how,”

“That’s because you’ve never felt it. Even people who have been in love, often find it difficult to put into words. You have to feel it yourself, Emma. You’ll know when you know.” Jonas said ambiguously.

***

At Jardin University, there was a girl who was popular for her friendliness and pretty face with an innocent aura. But it turned out, the girl who was always praised as a sweet innocent girl was not as innocent as she seemed. Just like a plague, the gossip spread very quickly.

As Poppy had imagined before, there’s no way that nobody on campus was a customer of the catlanguagedictionary.com site. Apparently, there was one of the students who had watched the live broadcast that night and recorded it manually with another cell phone. Then very quickly, the hot video was sent from one phone to another. Finally, all the people on campus found out that Poppy Castonia was a porn star who even broadcasted her lewd acts live on the internet.

Not only that. Finally, the disturbing news reached Poppy’s mother. The middle-aged woman was crying hysterically. Her career as a famous senior presenter immediately ran aground. She felt very disappointed in her daughter, as well as blamed herself for not properly educating and taking care of her only princes. But with all her might, she tried to be patient and accepted it all. She knew Poppy must be very depressed because her disgrace was spread and her childhood friend died tragically. Poppy seemed to have a series of misfortunes.

Poppy stepped into the campus lobby. She already knew what had happened. Because of that, she was no longer surprised at all the eyes that were staring at her with scorn and mock. Poppy held back her tears from falling. She kept walking with her head down as before, her past. Back to the state she was so afraid of.

“Wow.. our porn star is coming. I wonder how much she got paid for all that moan?” Said one of the gossip girls as she passed her. Deliberately speaking loudly to be heard throughout the campus.