Chapter 21

It was Lucian.

The moment I saw him, I grimaced and took a step back subconsciously.

In the dark, his glimmering scarlet eyes looked eerie.

I was sure of that.

Lucian Kardien had truly gone off the deep end!

(*PR NOTE: In the raws here and in chapter 20 it’s actually yandere. But I think that sounded a bit odd so I chose a more colloquial English term. If you guys prefer yandere please let us know.)

‘Estelle hasn’t even gotten close to the Crown Prince yet, so why…?’

I couldn’t help shuddering. The transformation had occurred much earlier than in the original.

Should I run away? No, I’d get caught in an instant. Wouldn’t it be better to smile and kiss up to him?

As I pondered how to protect my fleeting life, a familiar face appeared from behind Lucian.

“Pernia, you’re back! It’s a little dark, isn’t it? I was just about to tell Lord Kardien about Lady Monsel, whom I met at a reading club at the tender age of 16, when I was changing a lamp because it ran out of fuel. It was like fate casting its magic upon us. When Lady Monsel confessed her feelings to me, the light went out, just like now. Her revelation was told in the dark with a trembling, passion-stirring voice. Never have I seen a man quiver so disgracefully as I did in that moment.”

Only then did I understand why Lucian had gone off the deep end.

If my father had gotten all the way to him at 16, that meant my father had been having a Too-Much-Talk attack all day without a moment’s respite.

‘Hm, seeing my father was unscathed and still had the energy to rant on, I suppose he hadn’t completely turnt.’

I swallowed nervously and glanced carefully at Lucian.

His expression was different from usual.

His eyes were squinted slightly and his mouth was set in a thin line.

I corrected my speculation.

‘Is he…angry?’

When Lucian was not on the warpath, he was more harmless than a passing ant.

That was how he was able to slide under the radar of both Pernia and the nobility.

Is he really angry?

‘But no matter how I look at it…’

I glanced at him again.

A furrowed brow, a mouth pursed and even puffed cheeks.

‘I’m sure he’s angry!’

A drop of sweat trickled down my back. I was always worried about him turning dark, but I had never thought of him just being upset.

(PR: Again, yandere)

‘First, let’s turn off that sulking mode.’

It’d be dangerous to leave him sulking mode unattended.

If I don’t properly deal with it now, it might continue for the rest of his life.

To leave them be in this moment was especially dangerous for men like Lucian, who you never knew when they’ll take a turn.

(PR: Yandere)

‘But how?’

I thought frantically yet there was only one thing that came to mind.

A friend of mine who was a dating expert told me that there was one tried and true way to make your boyfriend feel better.

[Do you want to touch my chest?]

That must work.

People don’t generally get upset at the mentally ill.

‘Though, I wouldn’t enjoy being branded a madwomen by my fiance.’

Then, there was only one other way.

Apologize in a formal way.

“I’m sorry!” I bowed to Lucian.

“No matter how urgent my appointment with a friend was, I shouldn’t have thrown my fiance into the fire then vanished. I’m such a crappy fiancee. I don’t even have the right to eat, let alone breathe. I’ll skip dinner tonight and sit in my arm chair for the whole night and stare at the wall in whole-hearted reflection!”

The aim was to make myself look as sorry as possible, like a piece of trash dumped in a landfill, doomed to never be seen in this world again.

Fortunately, it worked.

Lucian’s sulking mode was switched off in an instant.

Lucian waved his hand with a perplexed look, his previous expression wiped away.

“Not at all. I’m the one who came to see the Marquis on my own. You only kept your promise with your friend. You didn’t do anything wrong.”

“Do you really think so?”

“Yes, I do.”

It would be trashy of me to step back and say, “I’m relieved!” with an innocent look.

I had to make sure I had completely averted this crisis.

I took a small box out of my shopping bag and thrust it forth.

“If you really think so, please accept this.”

Lucian looked at the square box I’d stuck out with wide eyes.

“…What is this…?”

“I saw it at the store I went to today, it was so pretty I decided to buy one.”

“Can I open it?”

“Yup.”

Lucian opened the box carefully. In the box was a red cake delicately adorned with roses.

I was so excited that I started babbling.

“Isn’t it beautiful? The roses on top of the cake are actually roses! And the whipped cream is infused with the pigments made by melting rose petals.”

(PR NOTE: I left the wording as is because that’s probably what Pernia meant but you don’t really “melt” rose petals lol. You do boil or grind it though so she’s not far off.)

“It’s very pretty. But..why would you give this to me…?”

I responded with a radiant smile.

“This cake resembles Lord Kardien’s eyes.”

When I had seen it on the cake display, I immediately thought of Lucian.

But the price was so high that I debated whether or not to buy it. I spent all my money on the dress, so my wallet was struggling.

I only decided to buy it after giving it much thought.

“…”

There was no sign of sulking on Lucian’s face anymore.

He looked as if he had been hit on the back of the head with the presented cake.

Like a child who had been given a gift he never imagined he’d ever receive.

He reached out with both hands and slowly took the box.

Then he smiled beautifully at me.

“Thank you, my lady.”

…it was a good choice to buy it!

I thought from the bottom of my heart.

────── 〔✿〕──────

I left the mansion with Lucian after just barely getting rid of my father who still wanted to ramble on about his sordid past.

“Today I’ll take you home. It’d be bad if you started bleeding from your ears.”

“You must be tired. It’s okay.”

“I’m not tired at all. I’ve been going back and forth in a carriage the whole day.”

Lucian looked at me with a troubled expression and nodded as if he understood.

The carriage soon arrived at Lucian’s mansion.

“Lady Pernia, if you don’t mind, may we get out of the carriage and walk for a while?”

“Yes?”

“I’d like to talk to you for a moment.”

His face flushed at his words.

I remembered his disappointment earlier today at how we hadn’t met for a week.

Like a lonely second male lead, there was no one to play with him. I felt sorry for him, yet at the same time I felt a bit flattered.

I nodded gladly.

“Okay.”

Under the dusk tinged sky with the moon looming high and full overhead, I walked side by side with Lucian.

Though the street before us was deserted and quiet it only added to the beauty of the moment.

The cherry blossom trees hung heavy in seasonal splendor and swayed gently in the wind, the stray petals blown away cascading down in a fluttering shower of pastel bloom.

It was such a spring night that exhilarated one’s soul.

I tucked my hair behind my ears, telling Lucian.

“Lord Kardien, I apologize again for what happened earlier. Actually, I didn’t know you’d listen to my father that long. I expected you’d run away once you found an opening.”

So I was surprised to see him still in the mansion.

Lucian relaxed his brows and chuckled.

“It was hard to stop him, as he told everything so passionately. And it was fun, too.”

“Really?”

“Not at all,” He confessed, eyes reflecting his traumatic experience.

“It was the first time I’ve heard someone speak in such detail. He started off telling me about his romantic entanglement at 15 but then when he forgot the exact details he went back to talking about when he was 5 years old again. As you can expect, it was exhausting.”

Hahaha. I’m a criminal.

Estelle blinded this poor man and drove him into the pits of despair. I thought as guilty tears swelled up.

Lucian posed his own question as I secretly wiped my tears.

“What about you? Did you have a good time with your best friend whom you exchanged diaries with?”

“Oh…” I said, glancing at Lucian.

“Again, I’m sorry about what you had to go through. I had a lot of fun!  We went dress shopping and chatted a lot at a cafe.”

“…I see. I wonder who gets along so well with the lady.”

Come to think of it, he said the same thing earlier today.

I suppose he was curious about my friend because I was known to be completely friendless.

Or, perhaps he couldn’t believe it.

I thought about it for a while then decided to answer honestly.

Besides, if I leave out the name Estelle, it won’t be an issue.

“She’s a pretty friend who brightly shines.”

I only touched her main quality, yet Lucian’s expression turned very odd.

After a pause, he muttered.

“You said I’m the one who shines.”

“What?”

I think I just heard something incredibly cute.

I looked at him wide-eyed.

Lucian asked with a slightly despondent face.

“Did you give the clothes you bought with the money you borrowed from me to your “shiny” friend?”

Hm, the hostility I felt from the word “shiny” must be an illusion.

I gulped before responding.

“I tried, but I ended up finding a better way. Instead, she got a matching dress to mind with the money I borrowed from you.”

“Your dress?”

“Yes. Your Royal Highness’ birthday party is coming up soon.”

“…..”

“It’s short notice, but I’m sure it’ll be a great dress. I asked the best designer.”

My heart bubbled over with enthusiasm as I imagined Estelle wearing the splendid dress made by Chanel.

‘If she still looks so pretty wearing such a shabby, tattered dress then how pretty would she look wearing a properly made dress?’

But my blissful fantasizing was shattered by the following sentence.

“So…you’re saying you got a dress for the Crown Prince’s Birthday party.”

He didn’t say anything strange, but why did I feel that all too familiar bolt of chill?

I turned my head slowly, feeling an ominous energy.

When I saw Lucian’s face, I couldn’t help screaming.

Earlier, he had smiled like a child when he received the cake but now he was an entirely different person. His expression was icy.

‘What’s the matter now?’

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Are you mad at your fiancee tactlessly borrowing money to buy a dress to match with her friend?

Or was it so unthinkable that while you were being tormented by my father, I was off playing with dresses?

Or was it because he had grown to hate my very features?
(PR: TL literally said “You don’t like my eyes, nose and mouth?”. I think it’s a reference to Taeyong’s song?)

I couldn’t figure out what he was angry about.