Ch25 - They Are All Key Points

Primary School is much more difficult than Preschool

Editor: Vez 

Ignore him?

Sparta, who had been listening attentively in hopes of learning the newly gained knowledge by heart, was stunned into silence and quietly scratched out his notes on the sofa. Impossible, Miwu is so good to me, there is no way I can ignore him. However, he looked up and found that the other students were all listening with interest, and even Cong Baohui purred happily. Sparta glanced sympathetically at the kittens. Meow—such pitiful poor cats. 

Mr. Chiron did not comment about the small disturbance in class. Unlike Ms. Jiang Dabao, Mr. Chiron was the type who did not seem to care whether his students were listening or understanding his lecture. 

“The essence of human strategy lies in just the right amount of neglect. Despite having a pre-existing target of focus, it does not imply that we must act out on them right off the bat. The first thing we have to deal with is often those humans who are not our primary target. Simply put, we need more allies.”  

“This strategy is already very effective on humans who have a good impression of cats from the start. We just need to meow meaninglessly at them and be affectionate at them, which can easily be exchanged with loving caress. Remember, smart cats will choose to be friendly to female humans in the presence of unfriendly male humans. Although the human male would pretend not to care, he may put on an act and be staring at the glowing screen, or he does who-knows-what with the newspaper—side note, newspapers are meant to be shred only—in brief, he will try his best to act like he does not care about you despite you acting coquettishly. Not to worry, and you mustn’t be fooled by their appearance. They will peek at you while you are not looking. So you have to do the same and ignore them, pretend not to care at all, only play and show affection with the friendly humans.”

“The reason for this is firstly, we cats are always up for a challenge, and secondly, after the humans finally let themselves go after a long period of rest, they will act more excessive, such as spoiling you without belief and even love you more than other friendly humans. This is the sweet fruit of training humans. So despite the difficulty, you have to stick to it, and your victory will soon come.” 

“If you give the male human enough neglect, pique enough of his interest, he will begin to want to approach you. Remember, this is a very important point to keep in mind. You are only ignoring him, but you are not avoiding him. They are two completely different things. When you show an indifferent attitude, the human will develop an interest to challenge you. However, when you show fear or avoidance, humans are likely to get bored. That’s right, humans are such an unreasonable species.”

We’re sorry for MTLers or people who like using reading mode, but our translations keep getting stolen by aggregators so we’re going to bring back the copy protection. If you need to MTL please retype the gibberish parts.

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“Next, you can find another human ally and seek their touch and caressing. You can also jump to a higher ground, preferably a place the human male can see, and carefully clean your fur, especially your stomach. Be patient and lick your fur as fluffy and soft as possible, make your fur very welcoming. If the human male does not quickly walk away, and instead stares at you intensely; congratulations, you are one step closer to success.”

Sparta’s ears drooped as he remembered one key point after another. In his opinion, he did not need to learn these at all. Miwu is the best human who understands cats the most. I am very generous and let him touch my fur anytime he wants. Meow, I really want to sleep in Miwu’s nest right now. However, Mr. Chiron could not hear Sparta’s inner disagreement as he was no telepath and thus, continued with his monotonous lecture. 

“Third, encourage him.” 

“Next, you need to challenge yourself: break a rule set by the human male. Many smart cats can pick up some unspoken rules from human behaviour and posture even if they do not understand human language in the early stage. Many human men who do not like cats at first like to make rules, an attempt to assert their authority. I believe that many cats will encounter some unspoken rules made by humans, such as no eating on the table. As a cat, let it be known that we have the freedom and right to accept their food wherever we want.” 

“You can choose a good opportunity. For example, dinner is your favourite stewed beef. When your humans gather around the table to eat, you should skillfully remind them that the food also belongs to you. At this time, your target is no longer only the humans who are friendly to you, because letting the friendly humans violate the unreasonable rules set by the human male is meaningless to your conquest. On the contrary, their betrayal may lead to reverse psychology of human male. Humans are very childish. When they believe that their self-esteem has been hurt, they will not reflect on their mistakes, but will become more unreasonable. Therefore, our focus should just be on the human male. We have to bait them into breaking the rules themselves.”

“This is not a difficult task. Please take note. This is something that will show up on your exam. You quietly approach the male human, pick a suitable spot and sit down by his feet, neither far enough to be ignored by him nor close enough to let him touch. Then you raise your head to look at your male human. You can choose not to make any sound from the beginning, so that the human male can perceive your existence on his own accord. Of course, if your human male is stupid, you can make a soft call to attract his attention. Remember, this is also a key point. The call you use to express your desire cannot be urgent nor a constant meowing, but a soft and almost inaudible meow.” 

“Do so, and the human male will notice you. He will behave strangely, as if he was not taking you seriously, but it does not matter. They will soon show their flaws. Sit firmly in front of him and stare at him with your large eyes. He will soon become restless and glance down at you from time to time. Once your eyes meet his, you need to gently meow with encouragement. These steps may need to be repeated until the human male gives in.”  

“The sign of giving in is that the human male suddenly turns a deaf ear or avoids eye contact. On the surface, he might be talking to other humans, but in fact, he is fiddling with a piece of delicious beef in his bowl. When that happens, you need to stay sharp minded. You cannot attract the attention of other humans. If they notice you, they will also notice the human male’s abnormal behaviour. To the human male, if his humiliating act is exposed, he will lose face, which means that we may lose the chance to subdue him. You can gently come forward, stand up and continue to gaze up at the human male. He will pretend nothing is wrong and quietly throw the beef from his bowl in front of you.”

Sparta was even more puzzled when he heard this. What kind of human is this troublesome? Miwu never does such senseless things. If he wants to give me meat, he will pick it in a clean bowl and put it in front of me. 

“You need to act fast, like suddenly finding a piece of beef growing inexplicably from the ground. Carry the beef between your mouth and leave, find a suitable corner where the human male can see you without attracting the attention of other humans, and then quietly eat the fruit of labour. After eating, you can lick your paws and rest a bit, but do not forget to express your gratitude. You can go up to the human male, pretend that what he did never happened, and rub his trouser legs with your head. This human male might quickly move his leg away, but it does not matter. When you see him throw another piece of beef at you. Victory is in your paws.” 

“Meow, you will soon be able to stake your claim on this human male’s lap whenever you desire. He will let you tear up all his newspapers and even reserve a special spot for you on the sofa. No one will invade your territory.” 

Sparta’s tail curled at the tip with pride. I have a spot on the sofa. I did not even need to ask Miwu for it. My Miwu must have attended college because he is smarter than other humans. 

Mr. Chiron scratched the big flower on his neck, moved it to the centre of his chest and continued his lecture, “Next, we are going to do hands-on practice. In primary school, many of your courses will be accompanied by a lot of practice exercises. You need to pay attention. Today’s first practice is a short meow to express encouragement. This cry is not in line with our nature, but in the name of conquest, we need to constantly practise, which is not difficult. Now, sit down, hold your heads up, and repeat after me. Meow~”

Meow—oww—Sparta opened his mouth and accidently let out a yawn, which was greeted with Mr. Chiron’s silent glare. Sparta quickly lowered his head and rubbed his eyes with his paws, trying to get rid of his sleepiness. 

“Very good, again. Meow~” 

Meowww—Because they crashed in tone, Sparta’s especially abrupt tone shined amidst the group. A group of fluffy heads turned to him. Sparta closed his mouth somewhat embarrassed and fiddled in place on the sofa. 

“Repeat after me again. Meow~”

“Oww—”

“Meow~” 

“Ow—”

…

After the first day in primary school, Sparta received a lot of practice homework. The advantage of knowing common sense and accumulated experience from age that he had in preschool all disappeared in primary school. Such a cruel cat life. 

Sparta nestled in Miwu’s arms and dejectedly fell asleep. 

The translator has something to add:

Teo: I am dying from translating the lecture. I take notes in lectures, not word-by-word!

Also, we will be entering the first VIP chapter next update. They vary in length, so I will have to chop up most of them to make them more manageable.