‘Bluebird…’

But somehow she was embroidering the blue bird. Ezekiel couldn’t take his eyes off the nearly completed bird.

Her skill, which has become more sophisticated than when she was young, was vividly depicted as if the blue bird would fly right away. However, Herace seemed to be thinking deeply about something, and soon picked up the scissors.

Snip.

Herace tore through her embroidery with a pair of scissors along with a sound he didn’t want to hear. Ezekiel’s face hardened. As if to vent her anger, Herace cut through the cloth a few more times and threw the embroidery frame on the floor. And after that, she turned her head away, as if she didn’t want to look at him.

“……I hate you.”

After coming to Serpence Castle, it was the first time Herace spoke to Ezekiel.Her voice was calm, but the resentment it contained was clear.

“Rebelling against the Emperor is definitely a big sin, but…… Still…..”

“…….”

“Even Chris, my poor brother, you made him like that. Ch-Charles…… The Duchess did it.….”

Her voice filled with sadness as she began to cry. Ezekiel could only listen to Herace. But when she listed Charles’ name, his gold eyes glittered dangerously. The veins that stood out on the back of his hand looked like they were about to burst.

“I don’t know about the Duchess, but Charles was nice to you. I-“

“…….”

“……I hate you. But I hate myself the most.”

“…….”

“I hate myself the most for having you as my savior. No! I hate myself the most for keeping my life like this!”

With a shout, the scissors that were still in her hand quickly went up.

No one noticed, but after coming to Serpence Castle, Herace sometimes st*bbed herself with scissors or needles when she felt disgusted with herself. Usually, it stopped from slightly poking the tip of the finger, but when Ezekiel came to her, the emotions she arduously controlled jumped out of control. The hand she held high aimed exactly at her thigh.

But the pain she expected did not come. Ezekiel snatched and grabbed Herace’s wrist just before the scissors descended. With her wrist slightly twisted by the man’s power, the scissors slipped out of her hand.

Ezekiel looked at the scissors that fell to the floor and slowly dropped to one knee in front of Herace. With a serious look on his face, he looked nervous as if he had made up his mind. He raised his arm slowly.

“Herace.”

When Ezekiel called Herace’s name and held her both hands, Herace started struggling. Ezekiel waited patiently, holding her hand as if coaxing a stubborn child.

In the end, it was Herace who was exhausted and gave up first. Breathing heavily, Ezekiel slowly opened his mouth and stared at her blue eyes and fair face.

“I have sinned against you. I admit I’ve caused you pain. But….”

Ezekiel kept eye contact with Herace and picked up the scissors that fell to the floor. The sharp blade glinted in the air. Herace stared at Ezekiel with spiteful eyes and looked at the edge of the scissors anxiously.

“Please don’t hurt yourself. If you’re angry and can’t stand it, I’d rather you….”

He blurted out his words and moved his hand incomparably faster than Herace did a moment ago. The sunlight was reflected on the metal and the scissor was stuck under the bone with the sound of tearing the skin.

“………do this.”

The area around his shoulders quickly began to turn red and blood dripped down from the edge of the scissors. Surprised, Herace trembled as her face turned pale. She then opened her mouth and screamed for a long time. Her hands were unwittingly hovering around the man’s injured shoulder.

“Why…… what the hell is wrong with you!”

“I love you.”

Unlike her, who didn’t know what to do, the man’s answer was plain. When the man spoke of love so easily as if it were natural, Herace looked at him with bizarre eyes. But even at that gaze, Ezekiel raised his hand and stroked Herace’s cheek. The man’s eyes were full of emotions that could not be hidden.

“I love you, Herace. You are the center of my life.”

Herace shook Ezekiel’s hand and twisted her expression. This guy is crazy. He was obviously crazy. If not…

She buried face in her palms, and the tears she had been suppressing burst out.

“If this makes you feel better, I’ll get st*bbed anytime. So don’t do this again.”

Ezekiel carefully wrapped her in his arms and held her. Unlike a while ago, Herace did not rebel. Instead, she burst into tears in his arms, crying even louder like a child. She seemed to be acting childish as if she needed a corner to lean on.

The corners of Ezekiel’s mouth went up. With his eyes down, he felt as if he were in heaven whilst slowly sweeping down the back of the woman in his arms.

Her tears fell for a long time. However, after that day, the words Herace spoke, slowly but gradually, increased. And after Anna entered the castle, she returned to herself almost as much as before. Ezekiel could not hide his happiness whenever she talked to him first.

****

“Ezekiel.”

Ezekiel held his wife gently, who came with her dress fluttering and calling his name. A bright smile filled his eyes.

“I love you, Herace.”

“What are you saying all of a sudden……. I love you, too, Ezekiel.”

Ezekiel loved her. Looking at the whispering Herace, he vowed not to let anyone take her away from him forever. The crimes he committed were deep, but for this, he could live with guilt buried.

But during this happy time, something black came dripping down out of his ear, and then, as if dilly-dallying, secretly headed towards his right eye. Then, in an instant, it jumped up and went straight into the edge of Ezekiel’s right eye.

“Ugh!”

“Ezekiel? What’s wrong?”

Ezekiel blinked several times at the strange pain and blurred sight. But for a moment there, he forgot the pain because he was busy looking at his wife’s face with his eyes that soon became normal again. He shook his head and kissed his wife’s forehead affectionately. His eye was a little sore, but it wasn’t unbearable.

“Something must have gone in my eye for a second.”

“Let me see. I’ll blow it for you.”

Whoo. Warm and weak air brushed against his golden eye, but it buried itself deep in the right eye without moving its body and only swallowed the sweet affection.

*****

[………I will wait for the day you come to me, and tell you about the news of our child.

I wish you good health. I love you.

Your wife,

Herace.]

Ezekiel, who sat in the barracks, read the letter over and over again. It was hard to think that he was so careful with holding a thin piece of paper when he was swinging a heavy sword and cutting off the necks of barbarians.

“I….”

Ezekiel was more than happy. He wiped away the tears around his eyes after sweeping his thumb over the word ‘child’ on the paper. He was worried that the letter would get blurred because of his tears.

Finely folding the letter and placing it under his pillow, he lay in a cot and looked at the ceiling of the barracks. There wasn’t much time left for this gruesome subjugation. The northern barbarians will be quiet for years with this war, and then he can concentrate solely on his wife and child about to be born.

Ezekiel closed his eyes thinking about the spring day ahead. However, even if he tried to force himself to sleep, he couldn’t sleep easily. Eventually, he stood up and looked at the calendar and map as if possessed, dressed in clothes and took his sword.

‘Four days… it’s enough if I run alone.’

He was going to be in big trouble. He was on the battlefield, no matter how little time was left. If the commander of the knights is gone, everyone would panic. What he was going to do was a big crime.

But Ezekiel was strangely unable to overcome his desire to go and see his wife. Her stomach may not be showing yet, but thinking about his wife carrying his seed and smiling made him strangely thirsty.

After thinking for a while, he left the barracks.

“Where are you going? Your Excellency!”

“I’ll be right back. In the meantime, Edgar, take care of everything.”

Edgar ran scared when he heard Ezekiel was preparing his horse, but it was no use. Ezekiel saw only the direction of the castle in the distance and kicked the horse in the side.

Snow spattered on the ground and the horse neighed for a long time. A long black smoke followed the running horse’s tail.

****

Ezekiel couldn’t believe the sight in front of him. His heart was pounding as if it were going to explode, and his eyes grew as big as they could.

Was it a mistake to sneak into the castle and surprise his wife? Was it a mistake to be attracted by the light of the greenhouse shining alone among the garden where the snow fell?

‘Why…’

No, the problem wasn’t with him. The problem was them. Hugging each other near a long-growing plant in the greenhouse……. The two didn’t seem to be worried nor cared about the secret meeting.

The red hair shone proudly under the greenhouse. The big hand that constantly stroked her black hair was friendly.

His wife was crying sadly. Nodding at his whispers, hugging her old fiance tightly. Her smiling face was unfamiliar to him than her ever crying face. How can you make such a face? Ezekiel had never seen Herace wear such a face.

The emotions in her blue eyes were so complex that it was hard to read, but at the same time, they were so clear and sincere. So it was even more painful for him to see. You didn’t smile at me. You never looked at me like that.

The dry thorn stuck in his heart silently ate away at him. It was dying, but it quickly grew in power again, sprouted in a short time, blossomed, and dropped a fruit.

Thousands of seeds from the fallen fruit eroded the whole mind. So abundant nourishment has grown all those seeds and borne fruit again…….

‘To me…’

Herace, who was shaking her head, stepped back, saying what? She staggered back as if she had been caught in something, perhaps by God’s play. Ezekiel almost ran forward without realizing it.

At that moment, Charles quickly reached for her. A swift approach, a smiling face with a sigh of relief. There wasn’t a bit of awkwardness between the two.

Alas… Ezekiel couldn’t keep his eyes open anymore.

As he closed his eyes, black smoke crept out of his right eye and wrapped around him. At the same time, a low laugh and a dim voice whispered in his ear.

[Is the child in your wife’s stomach really yours?]

***

T/N: I knew this was coming and one of the reasons why I picked this novel up. Usually in angst novels, it is mainly the ml who is at fault. But I can see it clear as day that it is the FL who is at fault here. It doesn’t matter whom she loves, if it was herself, seeing her husband embracing another woman, she would be hurt and resentful too. I am not saying the ml isn’t at fault either. No matter how much you are dissatisfied with your wife, just divorce her. No need to torture her physically, mentally and emotionally.

My point is, both the FL and ML here are the main reason for their unhappiness. The FL shouldn’t have embraced a man after their marriage, no matter how much she missed him. Misunderstanding can be caused with anyone behaving like that. And the mL shouldn’t have tortured her so much and at least ask her the reason.

It’s just my opinion (so please don’t kill me)

Happy reading 

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