The Hated Male Concubine

“Was he happy?” 

Yihan asked the eunuch. The eunuch, who kneeled in front of the Emperor, was the eunuch who brought the tea to Jeongan Palace. Holding the report which he had discussed with the ministers seriously until a while ago, the emperor had a rather excited face. The eunuch answered with his head bowed. 

“Yes, Your Majesty. He didn’t make it too obvious, but he couldn’t take his eyes off the tea you gave him and smiled.” 

“It was your first time to send a gift to Jeongan Palace since His Highness Yeonbin was in big trouble, so he must have been very happy.” 

It was Eunuch Oh, standing next to the Emperor, who added. The corners of Yihan’s mouth couldn’t keep its dignity and twitched. 

“And? And what else?”

Was it only the corners of his mouth? The uncharacteristically fidgeting hips revealed the emperor’s feelings of wanting to run to Jeongan Palace immediately. Eunuch Oh preferred to turn his eyes away from the seriously frivolous appearance of the emperor. The eunuch answered.

“And His Highness said: I will be waiting for His Majesty.” 

“What?” 

Yihan’s body jolted as he asked reflexively. The eunuch said again. 

“He said he would wait for you.” 

“… What?” 

“His Highness Yeonbin said: I will wait for His Majesty. He asked me to tell you that.” 

Eunuch Oh opened his mouth one step ahead of the emperor, who opened his mouth again, as if it were not enough to ask twice. 

“Your Majesty. His Highness Yeonbin seems to be eagerly waiting for you to come.”

Eunuch Oh had seen all the changes in Yihan, but there was no need to show all Yihan’s honest sides in front of a mere eunuch. It was only after Eunuch Oh intervened that Yihan realized that he had been asking back like a fool, so he coughed once and continued. 

“Yes, I see. You can go now.” 

While he was talking, he kept smiling. His eyes, mouth, and facial muscles seemed to be out of control. While looking at the eunuch who left with short and quick steps, Yihan immediately raises his hands to cover his face. A laughter leaked out of his lips, which he struggled to close. 

“Yeonbin is waiting for me.” 

Yihan, who had rubbed his face up and down several times, eventually couldn’t hold it in and said, looking at Eunuch Oh. It was a happy voice that he himself couldn’t understand. 

Yeon Hwawoon, who crouched and was eager to leave whenever he saw him. The person who always asked why he came whenever he came to visit, making Yihan sad. 

“He said he will be waiting for me.”

The person who was acting firm like a person who wouldn’t give him a piece of his heart said he’d wait for him with his own mouth. That made his heart overwhelmed. Yihan knew that he was showing a very ridiculous appearance to Eunuch Oh, but he felt like he couldn’t stand it if he didn’t express this feeling to anyone. Eunuch Oh bowed down and played along. 

“Yes, Your Majesty. Jeongan Palace will be waiting for you to come.” 

At the answer, the emperor’s eyes looked at the scenery outside the window, which was so bitterly bright. Looking at the burning sun as if it would never set, Yihan muttered unconsciously. 

“When on earth will the night come…” 

Today seemed to be a long day. 

***

“Don’t I look too sick?”

Hwawoon said as he diligently saw his appearance reflected in the mirror. Ahjin shook her head, brushing Hwawoon’s hair once again for no reason. 

“It’s okay. You’re very beautiful, Your Highness.” 

Hwawoon was somewhat busy in his heart today. The night His Majesty said he was coming was very slow as if it would not come, but strangely, he felt restless as if being chased by something. 

He asked for a hand mirror, which he had never looked for before in his life. He looked at his reflection while sitting on the bed, and it seemed it wouldn’t be strange for him to pass out right away because his face and lips were so pale. He felt the pain of the wound even now, and perhaps because of the repeated biting, his lips were as rough and dull as the patient’s.

He thought he didn’t want to greet the Emperor in this way. Despite criticizing himself that it was an unseemly behavior, Hwawoon wanted to greet the Emperor with a healthy look when he came. Even if Hwawoon made an excuse that he didn’t want to worry him. Even if he made an excuse that he didn’t want to add unnecessary concerns with his sick appearance since the Emperor cared about these small wounds, he couldn’t fool his heart.

Hwawoon was hoping that his appearance would be a little better for the Emperor to see. It was a confusing feeling for Hwawoon, who had never cared about his appearance in his life. 

When he added redness to his cheeks and lips to give life to his pallid face, his appearance, which looked like a dead person, improved somewhat, but Hwawoon couldn’t take his eyes off the mirror as though he was uneasy.

Then Hwawoon sighed again briefly. This was because he felt he was so brazen to pay attention to the face that wasn’t even his face. No matter how he looked at it, it was really ridiculous of him to act as if the beautiful face was his from the start. 

“Your Highness, you really are beautiful. Your skin is so fair, so inevitably, you look a little pale, but you still look much better now. His Majesty will be able to relieve his worries.” 

Ahjin added, interpreting Hwawoon’s sudden darkened expression differently. Hwawoon smiled softly at Ahjin only then. He didn’t want to worry Ahjin as it was a thought that he couldn’t tell anyone anyway. 

“Did you keep the tea His Majesty gave me well?”

At the ensuing question of Hwawoon, Ahjin managed to hold back her smile. Did you store the tea well? Did you keep it well? His Majesty gave it, so you have to take care of it very well. Hwawoon was already repeating those questions a few times. Earlier, he was just looking at the tea leaves for a long time, so she asked him, “Do you want me to boil it?” He answered with a regretful face, telling her to keep it well because it was a precious item. And after that, he kept asking the same question. 

He didn’t say he liked it openly, but Ahjin, who felt good as she seemed to be able to see how happy her master was with the gift from the Emperor, nodded eagerly and answered. 

“Sure, Your Highness. I told the girls to be extra careful and keep it well. I’ll check every day carefully, too.” 

“No, well… you don’t have to go that far…” 

“What do you mean? His majesty sent it for you. I will really, really take care of it, so don’t worry, please.”

Hwawoon looked relieved at Ahjin’s repetitive determination, even though he said she didn’t have to do so. What should I do about our master who becomes so lovely day by day? Hwawoon would never know that Ahjin was worried about it at that moment. 

“How is the time not moving fast…” 

After a moment of silence, Hwawoon muttered silently to himself. He thought he had spent a very long time, but it was still dusk outside the window, and the sun, which has been getting considerably longer with the season, was still hanging in the sky. Whether the sun went down quickly or late, it was still the same time. When Hwawoon murmured because today’s sun felt cruel.

A court lady who rushed in with an urgent step opened her mouth in a very excited voice. 

“Your Highness! His Majesty is coming!”

It was still bright to call it a night. Hwawoon’s face was immediately filled with a bright smile, as he had never imagined the Emperor would come already. His heart, which moved slowly like the slow sun, began to pound loudly. 

***

Yihan stopped at the entrance for a while and looked at the courtyard of Jeongan Palace, which was seen inside the middle gate. It was not his first time, of course. Even after Hwawoon declared that he would change, Yihan passed this road several times and went in and out of Jeongan Palace. So it was a really strange thing to say. This place, this road, which he had been walking a few times, seemed to be unfamiliar again today. 

He remembered one night when he felt like walking on the road to Wolgung Palace. It was a memory of the night when he came as if he was possessed and left Jeongan Palace as if he were running away after saying stupid things in front of Hwawoon. Hwawoon could have been confused and displeased by the unruly emperor, but Yeon Hwawoon on that day made Yihan’s mind even more confused because he worried if something was wrong with him. 

It hadn’t been long since. He couldn’t say it was far in the past by any measure. Nevertheless, Yihan felt as if that day was distant as if it happened a long time ago, so he creased the tip of his nose for no reason. He couldn’t even dare to guess what kind of emotion this was. He wondered what has changed a lot in the not-so-long days that today he felt such unfamiliar and strange feelings.