The Kind Older Sister Is No More

Chapter 4 – Shattered Hope (2)

When she arrived in her new room in the third floor, her belongings were sprawled out.

The power structure of the family is supposed to be from the top to the bottom. Although she was the eldest daughter, but from an early age, the maids have continuously watched her be discriminated against. This was why they also began to ignore her little by little and solely cared about Riel.

Fortunately, it didn’t take a long time to clean up everything since she didn’t really have that many belongings.

Irene began to organize her things one by one, starting from the books and papers that she brought in just now. She began to hang up her dress and a few extra clothes in the closet and not in the dressing room, this was something she picked up after graduating from the academy, Irene then rolled up the picture that she secretly painted in her spare time and pushed it into the corner of the drawer.

After doing this, she organized some of her diaries and small items. She then used a dry mop to wipe the dust off from her room to make it look like a proper place to stay. She really didn’t mind cleaning her own room.

Above all of this, there was no Riel in the next room. This fact alone made Irene feel a great sense of freedom.

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The sunset-colored light poured into the room when she pulled down the curtain.  It was only a little while ago that it was daytime, however, it’s already almost time for dinner.

Irene, who just opened her door to ask a maid to bring dinner to her room, couldn’t even open her mouth.

“Ah–”

Smack

She was shocked. Her mother slapped her in the face and made her utterly speechless. The stinging pain from the slap could be felt on her left cheek.

“You bitch!”

Irene slowly faced forward. She could see her mother grit her teeth with an angry expression on her face towards her. Irene only managed to utter out a word after she realized what was happening.

“Mom…”

 

“I heard everything from your fiance! I’m really shocked to hear that you made Riel collapse after saying those kinds of stuff to her. You almost killed your own sister!”

“Why is that my fault? It’s not my fault that Riel’s sick!”

“What?”

Her mother flinched as she asked back with an absurd face. This was because Irene had a cold stare that she had never seen before.

She was taken aback for a moment, she then became more furious and shouted.

“Why are you talking like that? She’s not a stranger, she’s your own sister!”

“Why? Just because she and I have the same parents? Then… why can’t she sacrifice anything for me? I already gave up everything for her!”

Your and Dad’s affection, the maids’ attention, all my friends, and now, even my lover. Riel had taken it all away from me and I simply gave it up for her because she was my own sister.

Her mother stared calmly at her when she heard what Irene said. Then, she sighed deeply and opened her mouth.

“Why are you still throwing tantrums at your age? You’re already an adult, you should act like it. Why do you think Riel has everything? Riel’s body is…”

“It’s because she’s weak and we don’t know she’ll collapse. However, mom, did you know that I’ve thought a few times that I would rather be the sick one instead of Riel? It isn’t because I pity Riel’s condition, But it’s because I’m jealous of her, I resent myself for being healthy.”

“Irene!”

“That’s why I’m going to leave her and live my own life, is it wrong for me to do that?”

“Riel is your own sister!”

“I’m also your own daughter, mom. I was also a person before I was Riel’s older sister.”

I’ve never talked like this before to my parents. Ever they were always busy taking care of Riel, there wasn’t any chance for me to be alone with them and speak up about my problems.

Wouldn’t my own mother acknowledge my presence if I show her my honest feelings? I truly hope that she understands me.

“I understand, Irene. I understand how hard it was for you. You must have been very lonely.”

Her mother’s deep and dark eyes gazed at her’s. Even though she was the one that birthed her, they didn’t look alike at all. Irene also didn’t look anything like her father. Riel was the one who looked quite like her mother, especially when Irene looks at her mother’s eyes, it felt like she was facing Riel.

Irene smiled at her words. It was because she felt that her mother finally understood what she wanted, however this lasted only for a short moment.

“I understand. However, can you please go back to Riel’s side for now? Riel’s alone right now, even though she’s stable, I’m still worried and scared that she will collapse again. Since you’re a good daughter who has never worried me, you understand my feelings? Right?”

When I heard this, it was the first time I really wanted to cry.

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*****

It was the moment when I realized how cruel and useless hope was. Before I realized this, I kept holding onto a strand of hope. It was all shattered now.

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As soon as I realized this, it felt as if I had fallen into a deep pit.

I’m also your precious daughter, mom, I’m not just Riel’s sister, I’m also your beloved daughter!

I thought you would definitely understand if I showed you my heart.

This was such a foolish thought.

The moment I heard my mother’s answer, any semblance of hope I had left shattered into dust.