The Kpop Otaku's Dream

"A deal?"

"Yeah, an equivalent exchange. You need money right , what will you give me in return?"

Dear readers at this point in time, you might be questioning what my motive is right now? Why am I not just doing her a favor like a good guy and help her because she asked me? Well there's your first mistake. From all my 'research' on how to deal with noonas, I've learned 4 important lessons:

1) ACT LIKE A GROWN MAN AND NOT AN IMMATURE KID

2)NEVER GET SERIOUS UPFRONT

3) FORGET THE NUMBERS

4) BE A HUNTER.

And right now, what am I doing? I'm being the hunter stalking my prey. You got to make the unsuspecting lamb come to you, so that when you pounce its so much more satisfying. Understand?

Irene answer my question oblivious to my underlying meanings. Seems she wasn't lying when she said she was innocent when she was younger. She answers me confidently.

"I'll pay you back tomorrow"

Huh should I tease her a bit more or not? A bit more. I feel like my devilish nature is coming out right now. Must be that time of the month. Men have it too you know. it's called man's period.

"That doesn't interest me, I have money. Give me something that I want."

"What do you want?"

"Now you are asking the right questions. Firstly, how much do you need? and why?"

"$30. I lost my bus card. So I can't get home"

"Oh poor thing. Now I can answer your question. What I want is you.... ?" She looks at me with displeasure before her facial expression changes into something of mild surprise when I complete the sentence. ".....your cell phone number"

"You want my number?"

"Yeah, I do for whatever price you value it at"

"Why? And why don't you just ask?Why you got to be such a jerk about it?"

Seems like plan is working. She's talking back now huh.

"Because its fun, so how much?"

I really seemed to have rattled her with those words. She thinks for a second

"$10 000! can you afford that?"

'Only 10 G's? I'd have given you my entire bank account;

"Sure, I only have $2000 on me , I'll transfer the rest, what's your bank account number"

"Seriously?"

"Yeah so hurry. before I change my mind"

I take out my wallet and hand it to her. She opens it, obviously expecting me to be bluffing.

"You really carry$2000 in your pocket?"

I shrug and ignore her question. The answers pretty obvious. She just looks at me like she can't process what just happened . I think she's malfunctioning. Technician! Come fix Irene-dol !!

".....Weirdo"

Hahaha the way she just spoke was just absolute tsundere. So cute. If she were a conman i'd willing give her my company.

"So deal?"

Looking unwilling she nonetheless relents.

"Yes"

She grabs my book on the table and starts writing down.I hand her my stack of bills but she only takes 1. I look at her confused.

"I only needed $30, keep the rest"

I smile, put my wallet into my back pocket, but before she can leave I grab the notes from her hand.

"Hey what are you doing? We had a deal!"

"I know and thats why I'm fulfilling it"

"What do you mean?"

"Follow me"

I grab her wrist and tug her hurriedly out of the classroom, through the hall down the stairs and to the parking lot all while she protesting asking where am I taking her. She's definitely not happy with the sudden skinship.

"Tadaa!"

I point toward my bike, andhand her my helmet.

"Get on!

"I'll be your driver today"

*Silence*

I repeat again, just in case she hasn't' processed what's going on right now.

"I'll be your driver today"

"No, Thank you"

"Your cell number is worth $10 000 right?"

"Uh huh"

"Well you see, based on our deal If you take $30, I would still owe you $9 970"

"No you don't"

"A contract is a contract, if either party fails to meet the terms they are in breach.If you don't accept my payment, then you're the one breaking the contract. That can have terrible effects, you know. I'm not trying to scare you but you can end up owing me money."

Legalese, the language of scum bag lawyers. I had to deal with them from the age of 14. They are able to turn white into black and black into white. They do not only have silver tongues. Some of theirs are gold-plated. So over my 4 years dealing with them, I've picked up a few things.

"So to solve this situation, I've come up with a solution. My time is pretty valuable, so how about I drive you home. A personal drive by Dylan Park! It should be worth $10 000. I'm confident I can get some people to pay up even more. *wink* You therefore have two options Joo-Hyunssi , 1) Get on willingly or 2) I force you on . So what's it going to be? Yes or Yes?"