The Mask Of The Monster

(From Ella's Perspective)

"I don't think you have any kind of genetic link. Do you?" he asked.

"No," I said while at the same time, thinking that Leandro truly knew what gene was. Perhaps I underestimated his world a lot. Staying in this world, I thought that they did not know a lot of things. That was the reason why I kept describing almost everything to him. And he did not say anything as well. I had a feeling that he knew some of the things that I talked about, but still, let me blabber. 

"You surely are not emotional or so much sensitive."

"I might be."

"You're not. I know you. You didn't shed a single tear when you saw my Beast, when you had the nightmare, not even when you were trembling in shock after seeing that girl die. You think that's normal?" he said. "And sensitive? You might get hurt in some things, but not every little thing. If that was true, then you would cry your eyes out the moment you met me and I behaved coldly towards you. But you behaved as if you didn't care how I behave, rather you were focused in getting what you want." 

I looked down at my lap. He was right, every single word he said was true. But I did not realize that he noticed even the small things about me. No one ever cared what I did or not. And I was not a fan of showing my emotions as well. 

"And the way you talk, it doesn't seem that you have someone close to you who you like. Then there is no way you developed the fear of seeing them. Am I right?"

"Yes."

"And the overprotective environment? That surely isn't possible in your case, right? Your family never cared for you. I don't think they care if something happens to you. They are clearly not overprotective. And I'm sure you never had anyone protecting you. Not because no one wants to, but because you think you can protect yourself and when you need help, you make a deal_ because you don't want to be a burden," he said. "Am I right?"

"Yes." 

"And trauma, right? I don't know much about your life when you were in your world. And the way you behave, there is a possibility of this one. Some kind of trauma, an incident that made you feel this way- so doubtful about everything and so smart, yet so curious. So energetic and enthusiastic, so happy about everything, yet there is something behind every word of yours, behind everything you do, behind every look you give. You think I can't see it?" he said, bringing his face down so his face is barely an inch away from mine. "Am I right?"

"Yes," I said. 

"Tonight I will take you somewhere," he said, getting away from me suddenly. 

I did not expect this. I thought he would ask me about what happened that made me behave like this. But he did not. He was not saying that he would take me somewhere. So unpredictable!

"To the pub?" I asked. 

"No."

"Then where?"

"You'll see."

"Ok."

"You're going to let it go like that?" he asked.

"I trust you," I said, "with my life." 

He smiled and touched the mark on my right shoulder. His thumb ran on the place as he kept his gaze on me. I could not look away. I did not want to either. Being with him was always comfortable no matter what. 

"Mine."

It was a whisper, almost like a voice inside my head. But I knew that I heard it and it was him who said it. But he did not say anything further and left the room without looking back. Why was he so mysterious? I thought I understood him, but he never failed to prove me wrong. 

I sat there, thinking about where he might take me. If he was not taking me to the pub, was he going to take me to the cabin again? 

Perhaps he was going to tell Anders that I had shifter blood. That meant, Dad was surely a shifter. But how did Mom manage to meet a shifter and even sleep with him? By the appearance of the situation, it seemed like Mom truly had not much of a brain. How could someone go around and sleep with random people without using protection? Honestly, I was not much surprised. Mom and Linda were the types of people to do this kind of thing. So immature! 

But thinking back at my life, it did not hurt at all. I was kind of glad about the things I had gone through. Because now I could see the real meaning behind everything, I could sense the truth through the lies. 

I might not be the best person in the world, I might not be the best in doing everything, but I had some sense. I knew what was right and what was wrong for me. I knew how to survive. And that was what kept me alive so many years, gave me hope, not the unreasonable blind hopes, but the ones with a possibility. 

The dizziness was gone. I stood up and looked at myself in the mirror. I was the same girl with brown long messy hair, honey brown eyes, and pale skin with a petite form as if the wind was enough to make me fall. Wearing his shirt made me look even smaller. But I liked it. His smell was all over it. I had fallen for his scent since the first time he carried me. And even now, I could not get rid of it. 

The first three buttons were undone with my bra visible through it. The side of the shirt was down from my right shoulder, making the mark visible. The mark... It might not be the best-looking thing possible, but it was something. I felt a pull towards it as if I was_ proud of it. 

There was no denying it- I was kind of attracted to him. Perhaps I was since the first time we met. But I was reluctant to accept it. 

I went into the kitchen and saw that he was cutting oranges, wearing a white shirt that I had not noticed before. I sat quietly on one of the stools and observed as he skillfully cut them. After cutting an orange into four pieces, he placed them in a bowl and pushed it towards me. 

"Eat."

I took a piece and ate obediently. Did he truly care for me? All my life, I wanted someone to fear losing me. Was he the one? Did he fear losing me? 

"You're so deep in thought," he said. "What're you thinking so much?"

"I don't know. Even I don't understand what I'm thinking about. It seems like all the things at the same time making a chaotic atmosphere in my mind."

"You're chaotic."

I smiled. "That's how I'm coping with it."

"Tonight when I will take you to that place, I want you to be honest with me."

"I'm always honest_ with you."

"You're honest, but tonight_ I want you not to hide the things that you want to hide. Even if you don't want others to know, I want you to tell me those things tonight. After spending time with me, do you think that I'll betray you? There is nothing I'll get by betraying you. There is nothing for me to gain by killing you. Then why would I bother? I want to know you, the real you. I want to know everything about you- who are you, what happened to you, what are your feelings. Perhaps a lot of people told you this that opening up to someone can ease up your mind. But I know that you don't believe it."

"I would rather be full with my own thoughts than opening up to someone only to get betrayed afterward," I muttered. 

"Yes, but when I tell you this, will you believe me? Only me? Will you open up to me? Will you let me know what you truly are? Will you give me a chance to prove that this time, you will be cared for and protected and perhaps get something more?"

I did not say anything. His words were ringing inside me. What was he doing to me? I could easily say no and I knew if I said that he would not ask me to open up to him again. But did I want to say no? Did I not want to open up to him? No matter how embarrassing my life was, did I not want to let him know? And perhaps that was the reason why my answer was...

"Yes."