The mother planet secretly transformed without telling us

In an era when Lin Daiyu uprooted weeping willows and the average person was able to carry a cauldron, it was actually very embarrassing to be so ill. Fortunately, there were two extremely ill menstrual dysmenorrhea players in the family, and the whole family atmosphere was quite harmonious. The problem is that Rao Qifang, Li Laixi and her daughter are the type whose menstrual periods are as regular and self-disciplined as going to work, and then Comrade Dalei Zi synchronizes the little lady.

Oh my goodness, there are four more patients at home overnight!

Lao Wang, who was so focused on the holidays, didn't even dare to take a breath. The psychological pressure was so intense that he didn't dare to wander around wildly. He followed Li Cang's butt all day long and shared the joys and sorrows. , serving tea, pouring water, boiling and sipping ginger soup, the young lady is okay. The key point is that Rao Qifang has been really rude when he picked him up since he was a child. So, don't look at Lao Wang claiming to be his godson all day long. In fact, what he is best at is pretending. grandson.

With the weather in the twenties, Li Lai Si and Rao Qifang put on super thick camel hair winter home clothes and covered themselves with blankets. The mother and daughter wrapped themselves up like rice dumplings, holding a large insulator in each hand. Cup Laowang was sipping on the sugar water which was so hot that he felt it was too hot. Jin Yujing, who was full of medicinal fragrance, was sandwiched between them and acted as a living warm baby.

The young lady was not as exaggerated as the mother and daughter, but she also wore long sleeves and long trousers. The four of them were not energetic, and they were watching "Rick and Morty" on the TV that Pharaoh had stocked.

"The air pressure is too low." Lao Wang muttered, "Hey, Teacher Cang, why are you going?"

"Aunt Kong won't be back at noon or evening today. Am I not allowed to cook?"

"Can you do it? Besides making a big pot of chowder, what else can you do? Why don't you call your mother-in-law's disciples?"

Li Cang grabbed a hand-woven basket that Kong Jingqiao often used to buy vegetables: "Sometimes I really doubt that your eyes and ears grew out for venting. Yesterday, Aunt Kong just said that there are more than 20 people in her class. She's all sick. She doesn't have enough people for the banquet today. Where can you find someone to help you?"

"How about ordering takeout?"

I heard a cough suddenly coming from the side: "Uh-huh!"

Lao Wang glanced out of the corner of his eye. Three of the four people were facing the TV, but they were also staring at the two of them with the corner of their eyes, like zombies in a disaster movie or ghosts in a horror movie.

Of course the only person who didn't stare at them was our little lady. Tai Xiaoyi said: "I'm fine, I'll do it. What do you want to eat?"

Lao Wang: "."

Ouch, I'm an ancestor. Please sit down, please!

The two gentlemen each stood at the gate of the villa with a basket in their hands. They looked at the mountains, forests, streams, vegetable fields and flowers outside, feeling the caress of the warm morning sun, and they all breathed a sigh of relief.

Look at each other.

silence.

"So, Teacher Cang, do you think it's time for us to perform?"

"Oh, what do you know?"

"Instant noodles! Roast venison! Raw beef! Raw seafood!"

"Fuck me to death."

"Okay~"

It seems that Lao Wang himself understands that if these four options are really served to the table, they are not the ones who will be eaten alive.

Li Cang casually pulled out a whistle from the hay on the roadside and asked the embarrassed newcomer: "How come we are walking in our vegetable plot? I mean Aunt Kong's exclusive vegetable plot."

"I've obviously been hiding so well. Another pack of cigarettes." The newcomer was a little nervous facing the base's famous Jingjiehu himself, and muttered directly: "Ah, I mean... Kong Da The vegetable patch in the kitchen is not allowed to be touched by others. You probably want to leave the garden secretly while she is away, but I dare not tell you."

There is an unreliable leader like Xu Hongfeng above.

emmmmm, I can only say what kind of leader leads what kind of soldiers.

Under Lao Wang's physical coercion, the newcomer could only hesitantly point in the direction. The two of them had walked more than a hundred meters, and he was still shouting after him at the top of his lungs: "Uncle, please, please do it." Don't move around, you have to pick vegetables exactly the same way as Chef Kong, don't mess with things, and don't step on any areas where there is no grass."

Different things have different meanings to different people. The vegetable patch is equivalent to Kong Jingqiao's open kitchen. It is something that lives on the top of her heart. It is inevitable that these guys don't pay attention to it and even sent two people to guard it. piece of land.

The two of them first walked around a pasture, and then walked through several large vegetable fields, wheat fields and rice fields before arriving at Kong Jingqiao's exclusive small vegetable garden.

The first ones were done by Rao Qifang casually. Only this small piece of Feng Shui treasure land was cultivated by Kong Jingqiao. As soon as you see it, you can see a white chrysanthemum fence guarding the Z-shaped vegetable field, and there is a mulberry garden next to the vegetable field. There is a pond, and the cucumbers on the shelf are lush and attractive.

"Hiss" Lao Wang took a breath of cold air, twisted a big persimmon from the tree, put it in his mouth and took a bite: "My mother-in-law is determined to have some kind of obsessive-compulsive disorder. Is this classified by color? Hold the grass, It’s so astringent, this persimmon is not ripe!”

The persimmons were thrown away casually, and the same gasping sound came from the vegetable patch.

"Hey, it's not a scarecrow, what are you two doing?"

One of the two walked carefully through the vegetable field, and finally found the persimmon, picked it up in his hand and said with a wry smile: "Ancestor, you are my Grandpa Wang, why don't you? Tell me what you want to pick, and I will give it to you." Pick it, don’t bother with it.”

"Hey, get out of here!"

"Okay."

The two of them, just like Grandma Liu when she entered the Grand View Garden, picked up a green onion and stole a melon, and soon gained a lot. Finally, they studied the circle of white chrysanthemums: "Teacher Cang, what do you think this is for, color matching? "

"How do I know, snake stew?" Li Cang said: "Pick out two hens from the chicken rack over there."

On the way back, the sharp-eyed Li Cang saw the most familiar thing on a hazelnut tree. The big wand flew out with a swish, but flew back whistling halfway - being tortured by bloodthirsty and calcium sucking at the same time. The squirrels that have passed by are not interested in eating them!

"Old Wang, come on!"

Lao Wang casually threw the electric mouse out to do some work: "It's not me, Teacher Cang, why do you always like to persecute squirrels? On the island, it is roasted, stewed, or braised!"

Li Cang lamented: "You know, I have been homeless for a while. When I had no food, I used it to survive. The mountains near Yanchuan are infested with squirrels. This stupid thing is much easier to catch than the chickens raised by the villagers." Now, just use a hemp rope and pull it into a condom. After so many years, you probably have developed feelings for it."

"I would venture to guess that the squirrel may not want this heavy feeling." Lao Wang said: "You are breaking the law, you know. There are many wild boars on the mountain. It's silly. It's not illegal during the hunting season. Why, you are picky about food." ?”

"Hey, weren't you ever chased by a wild boar when you were a child?"

"."

Normally speaking, cats that are generally taller than the knees are fully capable of killing humans. As for wild boars, it may not be that exaggerated, but there is no problem in chasing people away. The few near Lao Wang There is no child in the village who has not been chased away by a little wild boar, frightened and cried, and has experienced a complete childhood. Don’t ask why there is no big wild boar. The big wild boar either doesn’t want to talk to you or is usually the talk of bragging after surviving. will appear in another context.

Lao Wang chuckled twice and changed the subject without embarrassment: "Speaking of wild boars, do you still remember the lame Ye who lived diagonally across from my grandfather? As far as I know, he is the only one who survived after being brutally charged by an adult wild boar. The person who came down, that old man was really tough. After being beaten, he was dragged away for several miles by dragging the pig's ears and riding on the pig. It was two days later when someone found him. Half of his ribs and half of his hip were completely intact. It was ruined and I almost didn’t fight back.”

Li Cang was shocked: "There are really people who can survive after co-writing. I always thought that sloppy old man was bragging after drinking too much!"

"Hey, Mr. Ye was said to be very handsome when he was young. He was a well-known handsome man. He never drank alcohol. He gradually became addicted to alcohol because he was injured by a wild boar and couldn't bear the pain when it was cloudy and rainy. ." Lao Wang was still frightened: "I also met an adult once, and he was still in heat. Fortunately, he was far away and I climbed a tree. He felt like he weighed 700 to 800 pounds, and his eyes were red. It was so scary that in the end the ranger came with a gun and drove the thing away. After that, I didn’t dare to go for a walk in the mountains at home for many years. It was a pure psychological shadow.”

"Wild boar is no good, it's not delicious." Li Cang said, "Besides, you can't usually see those things. When they are not in estrus, they hide behind people. Well, hedgehogs are also delicious, not much worse than squirrels. , just fry wild duck eggs with wild onions will be fine.”

"Damn it, people like you deserve to be sentenced!" Lao Wang was filled with indignation, "They're full of control inside!"

"There's another snake. Take it, take it. I really wanted to do that for a while, but then they sent me to a homeless rescue center."

"What about before that? Where did you come from? This mushroom looks good!"

"Maybe he ran away from another orphanage? I don't remember anymore."

"So, the people of Yanchuan must be reliable. After all the trouble, the people of Yanchuan took you in. When you were taking the college entrance examination, a group of old aunts and sisters cried so hard. Hey, I remember it clearly. , It’s like my boyfriend of eight years is dead.”

"That's true. This hospital in Yanchuan is indeed the best I've ever stayed in. I don't know what's going on now."

"You can post and look for it. What if you survive, right? If wealth doesn't return to its hometown, it's like walking at night in brocade clothes. Isn't it time to show off to others?"

"Hmm"

In fact, Li Cang didn't stay there for long. He was a student in name only, and he was one of the few people in the college who was allowed to graduate early. It wasn't until he entered Yant University that he went back to help both parties with the help of the relevant departments. He made a less than stellar political achievement. At that time, the place had changed beyond recognition. The dean had long been replaced. Several aunts who were very good to him had also left their jobs. Only a few were brought back for the purpose of taking pictures.

The two of them entered the house while chatting. The four zombies looked at each other with faint eyes. They looked at the two of them wearing exposed concrete robes and carrying squirrels and hedgehogs. Their expressions were half-smiling but not smiling. It was obvious that they enjoyed this kind of treatment.

Lao Wang bowed his body in an exaggerated manner and made an arm-in-arm gesture: "Good luck to you ladies, I will prepare lunch now."

Li Cang had gotten used to it early in the morning. He had played this scene with Rao Qifang countless times over the years. Except that he was still not very good at cooking and cooking, he was familiar with everything.

After the two of them clanked in, Jin Yujing said worriedly: "Mom, this is a squirrel, a hedgehog, and a snake. Do they really know how to cook? Nothing cooked in the old witch's pot in the movie is like this. Exaggerated!”

"No, at least there are no frogs." Li Leisi said indifferently: "Have you ever eaten a frog? I have!"

"Is that thing edible?"

Rao Qifang answered: "My son is good at cooking!"

"Yes, he has always been good at it." Li Laixi sighed: "Referring to his childhood experience, at most the ingredients are a bit evil, but the taste is quite satisfactory."

Jin Yujing believes that evil and law-abiding are obviously contradictory.

Tai Xiaoyi believed in Li Cang very much, almost swearing: "Li Cang is very good at making big pot chowder. Anyway, I can't make such a good taste. Well, his barbecue is also very delicious, and he can also simmer it." Ginger syrup!”

"I think you have been brainwashed by him!"

"It's a habit." Li Lei emphasized again: "Once you eat frogs, other things will become easy to accept."

"Why on earth do we keep mentioning frogs!"

"Because it was one of the most hideous things I have ever eaten, and Li Cang forgot to peel it!"

Jin Yujing stared dumbly at the mother and daughter with deep and nostalgic expressions, and suddenly a picture appeared in her mind: a little Li Cang was tremblingly carrying a large pot of frogs with colorful hands, feet and heads, using a kind of mother They looked at Rao Qifang and Li Laixi with as much anticipation as washing their feet.

this.

Is this really something you can say no to?

Oh, to put it another way, if I had a son or son-in-law who looked like this, I wouldn’t even vomit after eating a pot of frog skin!

Jin Yujing finally knew how Li Cang's unusual lifestyle habits, aesthetic preferences, and even the details of the selection of ingredients came about, and she was finally convinced that good-looking people and bad-looking people are indeed We live in two worlds - some people are treated gently by this world and life, and some people are kicked around by the world and fucked up life!

"Rao Qifang, do you know that you are responsible for what happened to Li Cang?!"

"What happened to my son?" Rao Qifang raised his eyebrows in displeasure: "You don't think it's a pie in the sky filled with leeks, right? He didn't kill anyone and set fire in the end. I have no credit but hard work! Well, at least in the normal world Not at all!”

"So you admit that you have it now, right?"

"What do you know? This is called the pressure of life. My son is dying and suffering, so I shouldn't love him more?"

"Sure enough, a loving mother has many failed sons."

"Hey, your family will not be defeated even if it is defeated. The emperor is not in a hurry and the eunuch is in a hurry!"

"I you."