The Record of Unusual Creature

The group sat at the rest area in the Mercenary Association, despondent. They were waiting for Becky to complete the registration process. After a long period of silence, Nangong Wuyue could not stand it anymore. She nudged Hao Ren’s arm and said, “Landlord, I think we still have one last chance to change the name before it’s too late.”

Looking sadly at the documents in his hands, Hao Ren had been mentally struggling these registration forms for the last one hour. He was too exhausted to move a finger at this point. “Do it yourself. I can’t think of more names; you can’t use numbers, special characters, names of politicians in the Kingdom of Holletta, names of Royalty, names of the administrative institutions or names of any geographical locations. Even ‘Oh Sh*t What the F*ck’ is taken. What else can we name our group?”

Vivian held her head. “But, ‘Dogs Have Gotten All The Good Names’? You can’t be serious! It’s so humiliating.”

The Blood Clan maiden, who was always proud of her noble bloodline, was facing one of the greatest blemishes in her life. She was going to be the chief combat wizard of Dogs Have Gotten All The Good Names Mercenary Group. That made her want to dig a hole and bury Hao Ren alive: he was the one who made the f*cking name up.

“But amazingly, the name’s allowed.” Lily was the only one not feeling one bit of mental stress. She was even proud of the name. “I thought uncommon words would be struck out. But hey, we never thought it was possible. In fact, the name’s pretty cool. It means we’ve got a good name. I feel like I’m becoming the president…”

“Bullsh*t! You know you’re a pupper.” Vivian shot Lily a glance. “Those who are uninformed may think that the group was named after you.”

Right. Just as most people had expected, these substitute mercenaries ended up with a name that could only be found in the performing arts. Of course, there was another reason; aside from exhaustion, the provisional nature of the mercenary group was another factor. Besides, Hao Ren had also read from brochures he picked up from the Mercenary Association about other mercenary groups such as Pink Bunny Mercenary, which had successfully slew a dragon, and One Big Prosperous Family Mercenary which had once pursued the devil. All these further reinforced his notion that the most ordinary was the most versatile.

No one knew for sure what the dragon and the devil felt during their final moments. Perhaps they broke down completely when they heard the names of these mercenary groups.

“Sorry for the long wait!” Becky’s voice woke them up from their thoughts. The mercenary ran excitedly towards Hao Ren. “Everything’s done… What’s going on? You lot look gloomy.”

“Oh come on, don’t you feel ‘Dogs Have Gotten All the Good Names!’ isn’t right?” Nangong Wuyue looked at Becky and could not understand how Becky could still be so happy as well as be so insensitive and unapologetic.

“It’s just a name. People use all kinds of names nowadays. You’d be laughed at for your lack of creativity if you name yourself something like ‘Silver Hand’.” Becky waved as she continued. “Now, let’s head over to the task information counter to get some info about the Beinz Blood Lake. Too many accidents happened there. Only mercenary groups are allowed to go.”

It seemed the locals in this world did not really care about names of mercenary groups.

They cheered themselves up before heading over to the task information counter. Hao Ren focused his thoughts on the Beinz Blood Lake and forgot about the godd*mn name for the time being. Standing behind the task information counter was a boring female with eyes of a dead fish. She seemed to dislike talking. She looked impatient when she learned that there was yet another group coming for the Beinz Blood Lake. “Another over-optimistic bunch of fellows… Good luck on coming back in one piece, if you’re coming back at all.”

Hao Ren ignored what she just said. He passed the completed registration documents to her. However, he got a shock when he heard, “A newly registered group? No, no, you’re not going there. No pass for you.”

“Why not?” Becky shouted. “Haven’t there been many temporary mercenary groups going there for the last couple of days?”

“That’s exactly the problem. The top has ordered to halt all expeditions by beginners.” The lady with dead fish eyes spoke in a monotone voice. “Those fake mercenaries, who formed a temporary group and tried their luck, were beaten black and blue halfway to the Blood Lake. It’s for your own good. The Blood Lake’s a dangerous place. Getting across the area is nothing like a walk in the park. Without team work and experience, getting in there’s as good as being dead.”

The lady with dead fish eyes was not particularly polite. Perhaps she was frustrated from repeating the same narrative over and over for the last two days. Hao Ren knew what she said was the truth but, he was not going to give up just like that. “Then how could we—”

“You’re a Tier Five group, individual ranking notwithstanding. You’ve got to move up to Tier Four.”

In short: no professional qualification, no pass!

Hao Ren did not expect to encounter the same form of credentialism in a foreign world. “Reality” was indeed a b*tch. He muttered to Becky, “What are Tier Four and Tier Five mercenaries all about? Mind explaining everything about that to me?”

“There are two categories of gradation: individual and group. Both categories are ranked accordingly from Tier Five to Tier One—Five being the lowest while One, the highest. Above these are people with great contribution, who would be granted with honourable titles conferred by the Royals or the Church. For groups, Tier Five to Tier Four is quite easy with a requirement of only 20 missions; Tier Four to Tier Three has a higher requirement; Tier Three to Tier Two requires mission evaluations as well as vocational skills re-evaluation and a political review by governmental organisations; Tier Two to Tier One requires a test on three common foreign languages, a military strategy written examination, written test on the dogma of knighthood, as well as personal cultivation and conduct interview. All in all, apart from combat ability, you need to be top notch in looks and thinking in order to be the best of the best. Individual tests are similar with some subtle differences. I’ve passed the political review but not the tests on dogma of knighthood, and personal cultivation and conduct. So, I’m stuck at Tier Two.”

Hao Ren’s expression became stiff as he quietly thought to himself: reality’s really a b*tch, even mercenaries here require the same kind of professional examinations! Come on, it’s a foreign world, can you just tell me where and how many to kill? Even public service examinations are easier than this!

“What would happen if one goes to the Blood Lake without a pass?” Hao Ren was not inflexible. He was asking this, trying to get around things.

“You better not. Other places may be alright but not the Beinz Blood Lake—it’s a sacred land. Although it’s not yet a restricted zone, the situation is unpredictable. There are many knights from the Church as well as the Kingdom there.” Becky glanced at Hao Ren. “You’ll get yourself into trouble without a pass, especially when if they think you’re a pagan looking for trouble.”

“Twenty missions… After completing 20 mission, we’ll be rookies no more, right?” asked Hao Ren. The fish-eyed lady behind the counter replied with a resounding yes.

“What about mission issuance? What’s the process?”

“You get it done here. For simple jobs, you submit your job description and reward upfront. The lowest reward amount is one Denar, no upper limit though. For job rewards of more than 10 Denars, the association will take one-tenth as commission. Reward amounts less than 10 Denars will be paid in full to the mercenary, no fees. Of course, don’t expect there to be a taker if the pay’s too low. You’ve got to be sensible. Do you want to issue any job?”

Hao Ren turned to Becky. “Do you have one Denar?”

“One? Of course…” Becky was puzzled but, she still took out a coin and gave it to Hao Ren.

Hao Ren slammed the metal coin on the counter. “I hereby issue a job to find someone. One Denar reward. Mission target: Nangong Wuyue.”

Everyone was dumbstruck.

The staff with dead fish eyes did not know what just happened. She immediately filled up a form. Then, Hao Ren shoved Nangong Wuyue in front of the counter and said, “Dogs Have Gotten All the Good Names Mercenary accepted the job. Here’s the subject we’ve found.”

Ten minutes later, at the entrance of the Mercenary Association…

Squatting on the steps, Hao Ren and his four “bodyguards” stared at the pedestrians on the main street with a wonderful expression on their faces. Becky was in a state of half dementia for most of the day before she uttered, “…I guess they’re going to issue a new regulation by tomorrow.”

Hao Ren turned his head around and looked at the entrance of the Mercenary Association, which was shut. “Do you think they’re going to kill me the next time I go in there?”

“Absolutely.”