The Stars In Your Eyes

Bai Yutang lists their assets. He needs to ask for his lover's opinion about this. This clearly was not a simple matter he could solve alone. He rubbed his temples which had been throbbing hard with pulsating veins. 

Can he just say no? Their family was not in the proper position to offer any help, even themselves already struggling hard to earn money. Bai Yutang sighed. He knew exactly his mother had a soft spot for his uncle. Bai Yutang himself can't blame her mother. If Bai Yuren someday asks him to help him pay tuition for his nephew, he might have the same concern with his mother right now.

[Gege, can i talk to you when you're not busy?]

Jian Kang Lu read that message 3 hours later. He was smiling when he saw a message from his kitten, but then his straight eyebrow frowned to see the content. He called his kitten directly..

"Baby, what's the matter? Sorry i just read your message."

"Gege.. I need your advice. Are you still busy? If you are, we can talk again later."

Is Jian Kang Lu busy? Yes he is. But his kitten is his priority. It was rare for his kitten to ask him like this during his working hour.

"No, I'm not. I have ear to listen to you."

Bai Yutang took a deep breath, and explained what's weighing his mind. He excluded his personal feelings. Deep inside he wants to complain to his lover, saying that he feels unfair if they have to share the burden of his cousin's tuition. Bai Yutang still remembers he needed to take 1 semester off, eat only buns and fried rice everyday, live in that shabby hostel before his lover caught him and took him.

But he was afraid to act like a child in front of his mature and wise lover. So he just cut the explanation short.

Jian Kang Lu listens to his kitten's explanation, and he can hear his kitten's voice has a hint of miserable feeling. If based on his personal feelings, he wants to scold his kitten's uncle. But he said nothing, it was his kitten's family. He doesn't have the right to reprimand the unreasonable uncle of his kitten.

Jian Kang Lu was sitting in his office. The nephrology division's office containing desks of his colleagues, with the administration's worker of nephrology division sit in the room next to this office. The paper stacked in their desks, books and research, messy and disorder. Only Jian Kang Lu's desk looked clean without papers. He prefers to keep everything online on his computer and tablet.

He was silent and typed something in his tablet. Then he doesn't hear his kitten say anything more.

"Gege, so? What do you think?"

Jian Kang Lu asked slowly, "First of all, what do you think, TangTang?"

Bai Yutang stares blankly at the family photo on his desk. "If my father is still here, he will definitely help my uncle. Personally, I don't know, gege.. That's why I asked you. It was just.. I don't want to see my mother sad or stressed out because of this."

Jian Kang Lu understood, then he quickly explained several things his kitten could suggest to his mother. After that long explanation, he then said in a soft voice, "No matter what, you have my full support. So don't think too much."

Bai Yutang felt his eyes a little bit warm to hear those assuring words. "Thank you, and i'm sorry gege.."

'I'm sorry that I always burden you.'

Bai Yutang ends the phone, and he goes downstairs. His mother has already started to work in the kitchen while Bai Yuren is still not seen yet.

"Mom.."

His mother raised her face, and Bai Yutang ached to see his mother's face who used to be radiant and lively, now seems ageing fast. There's no light within.

"Mom, I have been thinking about that. Let's talk while preparing tomorrow's dish."

Bai Yutang starts to help his mother clean the shrimps and wash the vegetables. His slender hands skilfully peel the shrimp naked.

"First, we can sell the car. Two, we can rent out this house, or seek loans with this house as collateral. Three, seeking loans with D district house as collateral. Four, borrow money from Jian Ge. No matter what option, we can only help with the tuition. For other costs, uncle has to provide it by himself." D district house is the house of his uncle and his grandparents living now.

Lu Hua didn't want to cry, but she felt so guilty to burden her son like this. Her voice was hoarse, "If we're seeking loan or borrow money, who will pay for that?"

Bai Yutang sighed, "I will. I will start looking for a job next month. Don't worry about that." His hands automatically peel those shrimps without much emotion. 

Lu Hua saw his son's back. His skinny son sat and peel the shrimps. His shoulder looked so thin and frail, but who can guess that this tiny shoulder has to be strong enough to bear all of this responsibility. She can't hold her tears, "I'm sorry TangTang.. I'm sorry for being such a useless mother."

Bai Yutang's hand stopped. He turned his body to face her mom. "Don't cry mom. My hands were fishy, I can't hold you. Don't cry, or dad will show up in my dream and scold me for making you cry."

Lu Hua sobbed even harder, but she tried to smile hearing that. She still remembers her husband reprimanding their children the most if they make her cry. "I won't, I won't. I'll tell him that this is tears of joy."

"We need to talk about this to uncle and auntie tomorrow. But don't let RenRen know about this.."

His mother nodded. Not long after Bai Yuren joined them in the kitchen, all of them worked until afternoon.

The next morning, Bai Yutang had dressed and knocked on his sister's room. If he doesn't wake her up, she will wake up at 10 like yesterday. When the holidays come, his sister will play and read until late at night. Bai Yutang didn't blame her. She can't play much when her semester begins again.

Bai Yutang's uncle's family and grandparents come near lunch time. This time, his grandparents and auntie didn't need to help in the kitchen, because Bai Yutang and Bai Yuren had cooked all the lunch dishes. 

After lunch, Bai Yutang calls his mom and his uncle to his room, and talks about his cousin's matter straight to the point. Bai Yutang could see his uncle's face was reddened with shame. He pretended didn't see his mother's finger fidgeting, playing with her skirt. He calmly explained all these options and his condition to his uncle. 

"Uncle and mom had to choose which option you want to take. The car can't solve the problem until Jiang graduates, but at least it will give us some time to save until next tuition payment."

His uncle can't look him in the eye. With his head hung down, he asks, "I will try my best to pay for other than tuition money. But if it works that way, i don't think i can pay for the loan. And if you borrow money from your friend, how can I pay it back? The instalment? The interest?"

"Borrowing money is the last option, uncle. I personally prefer we sell the car or loan the house. About the loan, I'll pay for it until Jiang graduates. After that, it had to be Jiang and your responsibility."

There's a light knock at the door, Bai Yutang stands up and opens the door. He saw his grandpa, Bai Haoran's father, standing there.

"Grandpa, what's the matter?"

Bai Haoyu looked at three people inside the room. He walked in and sat in Bai Yutang's bed. "I want to talk to you about Jiang's tuition."

Three of them can't hide the surprise in their face hearing that sentences coming out from Bai Haoyu.

"I heard about this matter from old Lu. We talked about this, and I heard that three of you are discussing this too. Now listen to me. I'm old, my wife and my son already leave me. My small house might not sell much, but it will help Jiang's tuition."

Lu Hua hurriedly stood up, "Father! You can't!"

Bai Haoyu waved his hand, "Sit down, Hua. You know how much my son loved you. And in my old age, if not because old Lu and Jiang accompany my days, I don't think I can spend my days in peace after Haoran left me."

Bai Haoyu looked at Bai Yutang, "But of course, I can only sell my house if TangTang agreed. No matter what, if I died, that house should belong to my grandson. If TangTang doesn't agree, i won't sell the house." Bai Haoyu looked at Lu Hua's little brother, "You need to look for the tuition money by yourself."

Lu Hua is still standing, "Father, even though TangTang agreed, where do you want to live if you sell the house?"

"I can live with old Lu, or with you here."

Bai Yutang knew this might be the best solution for all of them, so he stepped up. "I don't mind, grandpa. You can live wherever you are comfortable. But D district's house didn't have a spare room for you.."

Lu Hua hurriedly said, "I don't mind you staying here, father. But please think about it again." Burdening his son already weighs Lu Hua's mind. But if her father in law sells his house for her nephew's tuition, she thinks she can't face her husband in the afterlife. 

Bai Haoyu nodded his head, "Then if TangTang doesn't mind, let's sell the house as soon as possible. It was not easy to sell a house these days. I'm afraid it won't sell until Lu Jiang graduated later."

With his grandpa's resolute decision, this matter comes to an end. Bai Yutang's uncle repeatedly says his thanks to this old man who looked so thin and pale, as if he was ready to wither at any moment. The trace of time decorate his face, who has been working hard all of his life.

Bai Haoyu felt he had lived too long. He felt lonely without his wife and his son. He knows his daughter in law family is good. Originally, old Lu's financial condition was better than his, but they still received his rough son with open arms, treated him well even though Bai Haoran was poor at first. 

Good in laws, delicate daughter in law, filial son, extraordinary and adorable grandchildren, Bai Haoyu felt he already spent his life good. He was satisfied with his life, and he had no regret in it. He had loved them with the power of a thousand sun, with his all.