The Stranger’s Homeward Journey

On the way back from the cemetery, Luo Shaoheng stopped by the flower shop, intending to order some flowers for the girls on duty in the resort these days. As many people nearby would come to visit to spend their New Year, they would be the busiest during holidays. In addition to handing out red envelopes to everyone, he would also send flowers and chocolates to girls, while cigarettes and wine to boys. 

The moment he stepped into the flower store, he heard a familiar voice before he could choose the flowers. He looked towards the source of the sound and saw his sister, Luo Qiongshu, talking to the staff. He froze slightly when the other party turned around. He reflexively made a turn and got out of the store, however, he was a step too late. He heard Luo Qiongshu calling him only after walking a few steps,  “Shaoheng!”

Luo Shaoheng stilled for two seconds then continued to walk forward with an even faster pace, pretending to not hear the shout behind. The click-clack of high heels rang out in quick succession indicating that their owner was almost running, accompanied by Luo Qiongshu’s voice, “Luo Shaoheng! Stop right there! After leaving the Luo family, you won’t even recognize your sister?”

Her words made Luo Shaoheng’s footsteps slow down little by little, and finally stopped at the corner. He smiled bitterly, but didn’t turn around to look at her.

Luo Qiongshu had already reached him. She was still panting because of the run earlier. She slowed down for a few seconds before reaching out to grab Luo Shaoheng’s arm. “Where are you going to hide? Did you not hear me calling you? Or do you just not want to see me?”

Luo Shaoheng’s fingers stiffened at her words and he whispered, “…… sorry.”

Luo Qiongshu froze and frowned when she heard his apology. “Now you don’t even want to call me jiejie1? Or do you not intend to recognize me as a sister anymore?”

“It’s not like that. I didn’t think of it that way.” Luo Shaoheng shook his head. He never thought about it like this, it was just that he had a guilty conscience and didn’t know how to face her.

“Then what are you running for?” Luo Qingshu asked.

Luo Shaoheng didn’t speak, but since he was her own younger brother, it was impossible for Luo Qiongshu to not know what he was thinking in his heart. When she looked at his slightly pale and haggard face, she felt distressed and helplessly sighed. She softened her voice and said, “Let’s find a place to sit. Jiejie has not seen you for a long time. I really want to talk to you.”

Her despondent tone made Luo Shaoheng a little heartbroken. Since he first came out of the sanatorium, he travelled around, wanting to go to all the places he and Shen Mucheng had promised to go, to complete their agreement.

He did so because on one hand, he wanted to unilaterally fulfil the promise of the two; on the other hand, he was afraid to face his parents, afraid that they would be more disappointed when they saw him. This kind of banishment-like life ended only when he set up a resort last year.

“Shaoheng?” Luo Qingshu called out to him.

“Okay.” He said in a low voice.

The two of them found a cafe nearby. After sitting down, Luo Shaoheng took off his down jacket and scarf, revealing a light grey sweater. He looked unusually thin even after recovering from a serious illness, but it wasn’t that obvious earlier due to the down jacket.

Luo Qingshu looked at him, her eyebrows twisted. “Why are you so thin?”

“Not really, it’s just like before.” Luo Shaoheng smiled and ordered coffee for the two of them.

“You still remember what I like to drink.” Luo Qiongshu said.

“Of course I remember.” Luo Shaoheng nodded. He remembered every preference of his family.

“How are you doing lately? I heard from Xiao Guai that you have set up a resort. Can you handle it?” Luo Qingshu asked.

“Yes, I can.”

It was probably because they hadn’t gotten along for too long, and although the two were obviously true siblings, their conversation was filled with awkward and polite pleasantries.

After a moment of silence, Luo Qiongshu said, “I should have gone to see you earlier, but I had been dealing with some things with your brother-in-law so it was delayed. The other day I went to the resort and heard that you had gone to Switzerland.”

“You and brother-in-law ……” Luo Shaoheng wanted to say something but stopped.

“Divorced. Xiao Guai is with me now.” Luo Qiongshu said this without any ripples of emotion on her face. She had probably let go of the matter.

“That’s good too.” Luo Shaoheng did not know what to say. He and Luo Qiongshu both stubbornly chose their beloved back then, but in the end, neither had a good ending.

A melodious piano music sounded in the quiet cafe. The soothing melody warmed up the atmosphere, making it perfect for conversation. Slowly, both of them relaxed and talked about many things related to the past and present.

“Are father and mother in good health?” Luo Shaoheng asked. He was busy with the resort after returning from his trip to Switzerland and hadn’t had time to go over to visit.

“Both are fine. It’s just that they have some minor ailments in their old age.” Luo Qiongshu said. “They all miss you very much.”

Luo Shaoheng looked at her suddenly. “I ……”

“Mother has been looking at your old photos and stays in your room for a whole day sometimes. Although she doesn’t say it, we can all see how much she misses you. Last time, Xiao Yao deliberately put the resort’s brochures on the rocking chair where she usually sits, and she secretly put the brochures away herself.”

“……” Luo Shaoheng was dumbfounded. He always thought he was a disgrace to the Luo family.

“Father and mother are old. What they want is just a family reunion. No matter who was right and who was wrong in the matter of you and Shen Mucheng at the beginning, let it pass. Parents scold us just because of their love and responsibility for us. They won’t feel any better than you. If they can choose to start anew, they will try to tolerate and accept you.” Luo Qiongshu said with a serious face.

Listening to her words, Luo Shaoheng’s hand on the table slowly tightened, and the bitterness in his heart surged.

Luo Shaoheng could never forget the afternoon his family found out about his relationship with Shen Mucheng. At that time, he received a call from his mother asking him to go home. Thinking that his mother asked him to come home because she missed him since he got together with Shen Mucheng, he specially brought them  some desserts he made himself to let them have a taste. However, a storm was waiting for him.

He didn’t know who sent the photos of him and Shen Mucheng to his family. When his mother threw the stack of photos in front of him, he was dumbfounded and overwhelmed by his mother’s anger that was shoved at his face. 

He hadn’t forgotten his mother’s furious face, and her stern rebukes were still ringing in his ears today. Nor could he forget the slap on his face when he refused to break off his relationship with Shen Mucheng.

When he was in elementary school, he was kidnapped by a business rival of his family’s company. When the other party was escaping, he pushed him down a hill. Other than the multiple bruises on his body, his left knee hit a rock, causing the bone to break. This was the most serious injury he had ever suffered, yet these injuries combined were far less painful than this slap. It was not from the body but from the heart, and all that guilt for his parents that overwhelmed him turned into a sharp blade, slashing him to death.

The Luo family didn’t need a son like him to smear the family’s reputation. His mother said she would never forgive him for the rest of her life and would never allow him to set foot in the Luo family again, as if she had never given birth to an unfilial son like him.

For so many years, every time he returned from abroad, he would secretly visit his parents, but he didn’t dare to let them know. Due to his immaturity and stubbornness, the harm that he had inflicted on his parents would be there forever. He was afraid to cause them grief again.

He also thought that he would never be forgiven by his parents in this life, after all, it was his fault in the first place. But now, Luo Qiongshu told him that everything was understood, and his parents could even accept his relationship with Shen Mucheng.

But even so, the person he loved no longer remembered him.

“Jiejie has always owed you an apology. I did not protect you in the first place after the accident back then, but chose to take Xiao Guai away from you instead. This is what I have always blamed myself the most for.”

“Shaoheng, go back this year for New Year. Father and mother don’t have many  years left to wait for you.”

Luo Shaoheng sat in the car, still in a trance. Luo Qiongshu’s words were still echoing in his ears. He never thought that in all these years of his self-imposed exile, his parents had also been waiting for him to return.

After sitting for a while, he felt his fingers turn numb from the cold and only then did he realise that he had forgotten to turn on the heater. After turning it on, the temperature inside the car rose a little. His fingers unstiffened a little.

He fished out his phone from his pocket, pressing the number that he had memorised whole-heartedly, and stopped abruptly on the second before dialling the number. He wanted to call Shen Mucheng, but he habitually entered the previous number.

He deleted the numbers one by one, and found the new number from the contact list and dialled. 

In the process of waiting, he felt nervous in his heart, like a young man who had just fallen in love for the first time, calling the person he liked, with anticipation and nervousness.

The phone rang for a long time before it was picked up, and a low voice echoed, “Hello.”

Luo Shaoheng opened his mouth and found that his throat was a little dry. He coughed lightly, as he heard Shen Mucheng say, “Still haven’t recovered?”

“No ……” Luo Shaoheng rubbed his throat, the words stuck in his throat.

“What’s wrong?”

“I just ……” Luo Shaoheng paused for a moment, “want to hear your voice.”

“……”

jiejie: Sister