The Villainess and I, her Zombie

"HA HA! HA HA! HA HA~!"

Cranberry was trashing around the horde of goblins.

No other sane person would just throw themselves at a foe that had such immense numerical advantage, but the red-haired girl seemed to completely lose it.

The best example of that would be that she was openly laughing in her own ugly way that sounded more like dog barks than a human voice.

"...this request was for a joint operation between every available middle-rank party..."

Shanks was looking at the one-sided massacre that frenzied Cranberry was dishing out.

The scene playing in front of his very eyes was already too much for his nerves to handle.

The sea of short green monsters with various equipment couldn't handle a single girl swinging half of a blue arm aroumd... and was retreating.

A horde of goblins was retreating...!

"...have... have we really slacked off with our training that much...?"

Lairs asked, too shocked to even curse.

She was sitting on top of the carriage and watching ten and hundreds of small monsters get torn apart with each consecutive charge.

"..."

Rotte didn't have the energy to even respond, he was simply sitting on the grass, and his heated sword was next to him, right when he dropped it after Cranberry launched at the monsters without any warning or explanation.

"Now, now, it's okay..."

Uresha was calming down the monsters pulling their carriage since the beasts got startled by the intense stench of death and blood in the air, and didn't really pay attention to the goblins' doom.

The other three Dandelions all turned to the blue boy watching the red-girl with a soft smile.

The little undead was missing his right arm but it didn't seem to bother him at all either.

He was too busy drawing in a big sketchbook that had to be expensive considering the scarcity of quality paper.

"Umm... hey, blue guy...?"

"Graough...? (What is it...?)

Shanks asked awkwardly and Zombie groaned at him without even sparing him a glance.

"What does that mean? Is it okay to ask him...?"

Unable to understand the meaning, the rat-faced man became dispirited and asked his companions.

"Graough? (What is it?)"

Zombie rolled his eyes, put away the sketchbook, and glared at the adventurers.

"Oh? I think he wants to know what you want."

Rotte poked Shanks's side.

"Really...?"

"How the fuck are we supposed to know?"

Lairs joined the conversation from above.

"..."

Zombie's glare became slightly angrier and he gritted his teeth audibly.

"Whoa! And now he's pissed...!"

Shanks took a step back.

"Because you're not telling him what you want!"

"Oh, for fuck's sake..."

"...graough... (... a bunch of living idiots...)"

Zombie shook his head in annoyance.

He himself wasn't too bright, to begin with, but that didn't stop him from disliking the living and their shortcomings.

For a moment, the blue boy considered writing to the Dandelions in the dirt by the roadside, but he rejected the idea.

He came to the conclusion that the Dandelions would not pay enough attention again and just write it off as him doing weird undead stuff.

So with a heavy heart, he opened his sketchbook and turned it around, to write on the reverse side of a failed driving.

[What is it?]

"Hey, look, he's writing to us."

"Could have done that from the fucking beginning..."

Zombie ignored their comments, frowned, and tapped the words on the page.

"Do you know what got into your master...? We were asked to simply scout the horde's size since we were going to pass by anyway, not to annihilate them...!"

Shanks asked in a slightly higher pitch than usual.

[Master said that she needs to let out some steam or she won't be able to complete her plan.]

Zombie wrote the answer and show it to the adventurers with an indifferent expression.

"What plan?"

[She hadn't told me.]

"Hold, the fuck, up!"

Lairs jumped down from the carriage and squatted by the small undead.

Zombie raised his brow and tapped the first question he wrote with his finger.

"She needs to let out some steam? What the fuck?! She's fucking risking our... Well, she's not risking shit from the looks of it, but fuck it... She's fucking throwing herself at a goblin horde counting at least three thousand heads for that?!"

The elven mage asked completely baffled.

[My master also likes killing. You and other living should be grateful that she mainly goes for the monsters.]

"..."

"..."

"...holy fuck..."

The Dandelions read the sentence and looked at each other.

That certainly wasn't the answer that they were expecting.

[And if you are worried about the numbers of goblins - don't. We both already have the bane of goblins title, and the champion and kingslayer titles too. Unless a goblin god will show up, there's nothing to worry about.]

"...fuck me... is he serio... fuck, he is serious..."

Lairs asked and interrupted herself with the answer within the same sentence.

Zombie straightened his back to check up on his maser down in the valley that was getting filled with more goblin corpses each second.

[Master is having fun.]

He wrote and smiled happily.

"Will her stamina last? Aren't you worried about her?"

It seemed that Uresha was interested after all, since she came over and asked the blue boy.

"Graoug...! (Pffft... Good one...!)"

Zombie snorted and waved his hand dismissively.

[Master and I once fell into a goblins nest and had to fight through the whole night to get out. Right now she's having fun.]

He wrote and showed it to the large woman.

"I... I see..."

Uresha made a worried expression and stepped closer to Shanks looking for comfort, but the short thief was just as shaken as she was.

"HA HA! HA HA! HA HA! ZOMBIE! COME JOIN ME! LET'S KILL THEM ALL BEFORE LUNCH! HA HA!"

Suddenly, Cranberry's voice got carried over to the carriage and everyone near it heard it.

"!!!"

Zombie jumped o his feet instantly and threw the sketchbook inside the carriage without even looking at it.

"GRAOUGH! (I THOUGHT YOU'LL NEVER CALL FOR ME!)"

He roared back, his body started glowing, and in the net second a large tremor ensued and only a small crater was left in the place where Zombie was standing until then.

"...Now that I think about it... he did write that the girl ALSO likes killing..."

Shanks trembled and gulped down his saliva.

"..."

The other Dandelions all turned away from the battlefield where the 1500:1 odds were horribly unfair for the more numerous side...