To Love You Again

In the isolated mountain, the Qian Mansion that was usually empty and quiet had a guest.

Lu Jin strode into the spacious living room. 

Butler Qian bowed and greeted him.

"Greetings, Young Master Lu Jin."

"Where is my father?" 

Butler Qian's face was expressionless. "The Master is not here."

"Then tell me where he is."

"I apologize. It is not something that I can tell you."

Lu Jin's face was frigid. "Butler Qian, do you know that Gunan was killed?"

Butler Qian momentarily trembled. He unconsciously touched the hand with the missing pinky finger hidden inside the glove. 

He lowered his eyes. "...It seems that it is time for Gunan to leave the Master's side."

Lu Jin narrowed his pitch-black eyes that were laced with killing intent.

"Is that what you can only say? Gunan treated you like his own grandfather. He looked up to you! Can't you at least grieve for him?" 

His emotions had nowhere to vent. To the calm Butler Qian whom Gunan treasured among the servants of the Qian family, Lu Jin's feelings were spilling out.

Lu Jin rubbed his face with his hand in frustration and suppressed the spilling emotions. He felt disgusted with himself.

….What was he doing, venting his grief and anger at this old man?

They were the same. They both did not have enough power to stop Ming Zhi Yi from killing Gunan. 

Lu Jin took a deep breath. His insides were shaking in nausea. He had the urge to vomit.

Butler Qian raised his eyes and looked at the Eldest Young Master. 

"Young Master, I might not be able to tell you where Master is, but I can at least assure you that today, he will arrive in the country. You can wait for him here if you would like. But please, be mindful of your emotions. You have to calm down when facing the Master. I will prepare tea for you--"

Lu Jin raised his hand to stop the elder from talking. He turned around. 

"No need. I'll walk around the mountain while I wait for him." 

He did not wait for Butler Qian's answer and left.

"...."

Butler Qian looked at Lu Jin's retreating back. 

The back of the young man was lonely, yet his resentment was clearly overflowing. 

The always calm and inwardly gentle Young Master had turned into this, like a deadly quiet volcano about to erupt at any time.

Despite his own sorrows, Butler Qian could not help but worry.

Gunan…

He closed his eyes. He then turned around and continued his cleaning. 

He was already old and experienced too many partings. 

****

Lu Jin dismissed his butler and his subordinates. He instructed them to not follow him. 

Since the mountain was not cultivated, the bushes were long and tall, almost resembling a jungle. The forestry was rich and thriving. At the end of the forest, there was a cliff that separated the mountain from another mountain. Below it was the river and more forestry.

Lu Jin stood next to a tree near the cliff. 

His eyes were looking afar towards the dark storm clouds. It had been raining heavily for a few days already, and although it was only a faint drizzle at the moment, coming out to this place in this weather was still not a good idea. 

However, Lu Jin did not care how dangerous it was.

He leaned his back on the wet tree. Droplets from the foliage fell on his head and rolled down his face. 

It was very quiet, except for the faint sounds of insects, water drops, and the rushing river below.

His dark eyes were swirling with many emotions. Away from the eyes of people, he finally showed his grief in losing an important friend.

He thought about his life, the choices he made, and Gunan.

Lu Jin had tried to do what he could to keep his remaining loved ones safe. He followed his father's footsteps and was obedient to the bone. He did not care if he became the bad guy or he fell into hell, because he knew that he had already made an irreparable mistake for bringing Gunan to his father. Thus, he was willing to pay for it.

Even Gunan.

He knew that what he and Gunan did was unforgivable. He knew that their ending would not be good, for they were people who lived by deceiving and killing others.

He knew that the heavens would not forgive him, like how it would not forgive Gunan and his father. It was already too late for redemption.

So he stayed in this hell. If he stayed, he could at least watch his father, stay with Gunan, and watch his brother and grandfather from afar. Even though he knew what his father was aiming for, he stayed with his father who only had the mind of revenge. 

All of it was a complete madness, the insanity of a broken man. Lu Jin could not do anything and watched his father and friend both sink into it.

But inside his heart, he still hoped that someone would stop them. He desperately wished deep inside for someone to appear and stop this complete madness before he also snapped, like what happened to his father and Gunan.

For so many years, they lived in this hell-like environment and schemed to drag others down with them. He had to constantly live on a tightrope, maintaining his stance to ensure that his father would not suddenly kill his brother and his friend. 

But… Lu Jin was already tired.

His brother hated him and Gunan was not here anymore… So what was the point of struggling?

It was always revenge!

His life circulated on this hateful word.

He did not want to be like his father and let this obsession drown him. Even if he took revenge and cultivated his hatred towards his father, what would it end with? 

How would it end?

Would he end up like his father, who was broken with that heavy word?

The raging resentment, hatred, and madness that he was feeling slowly toned down. 

Lu Jin closed his eyes for a long time, opened them again to stare at the skies, and thought about everything. 

He stayed in that position for almost the entire day.

....

A black car entered the premises of the Qian Mansion.

Butler Qian was waiting outside for the Master to come down from the car.

Ming Zhi Yi came out with a gentle smile. It looked like what he was doing abroad went well.

However, Butler Qian's report put a stop on his smile. 

"Master, the Young Master is here."

Ming Zhi Yi's steps halted. His eyes flashed dangerously.

Did his son come here to look for trouble?