Top Secret

Trigger warning:
This chapter contains descriptions of (sexual) violence that may be upsetting to some readers, so read on your own discretion.

Trying to imitate the behaviour of the experienced dog, he averted his eyes and got off his butt, wanting to go back to the room and pretend he didn’t have a clue what was going on, but the evil voice arrested Jaeyoon’s feet.

“I don’t even have to ask how you got in, that idiot must have opened the door. How dare you think about stepping into my house again? Why are there so many who forgot how to fear, is there a class somewhere for raising (training) your liver?”

“Seonbae, hear me out for a bit, please, the last time….”

“Who’s your seonbae!!”

He knew that guy would yell. Jaeyoon shut his eyes tightly and lamented Sieon’s cold heart that wouldn’t spare even a beauty. He didn’t have even an inch of forgiveness for that pitiful-looking woman. It was even someone who said they liked him….

But Jaeyoon was in no place to intervene – he’d made the mistake of opening the door to just anyone – and his primary concern was weathering the storm that would come later.

Sieon felt his brain cells burning with a crackling sound. He’d returned from doing office work because of the phone call from the security guard. Anxious, they informed him in advance that it seemed like the young lady from before had come again. Sure enough, not only did Inyoung visit the villa as the guard had spotted, but she was even sitting in the living room and drinking tea. I should’ve kept that idiot locked up, Sieon regretted.

“Seonbae, please, accept my heart. I said I loved you.”

It was so direct that it even made Jaeyoon’s face flush.

“Bullshit.”

But the man’s reaction was cold enough to freeze the Arctic glacier, which was melting from ozone depletion. Jaeyoon rubbed his forearm without even realizing. He prayed he wouldn’t touch the woman, but with this man as the opponent, it might be of no use.

“I made a mistake before because I was so desperate. Seonbae, why… why don’t you understand people’s hearts?”

“Oh, I definitely should have killed you, bitch. It wasn’t even enough for you to have my house covered in blood.”

When the word ‘blood’ came out of the man with a cruel smile, Jaeyoon opened his eyes.

Soon, fearing the experience of witnessing a murder scene, he came to stand between the two people. Inyoung was behind him as if he was protecting her, but his heart was pounding and his legs were trembling. At Jaeyoon’s interference, Sieon’s forehead furrowed deeply. The man strode over and came up to his nose.

“Maybe I should take this opportunity to get rid of both of you.” 

Jaeyoon swallowed his saliva.

“My-my-my mom kno-knows I’m here.”

The corners of Sieon’s mouth went up.

“What about it?”

“So… since my mo-mom knows- kuek!!!!”

Jaeyoon, who wanted to confidently say ‘there’s someone who knows where I am, so you can’t just do whatever you want with me’, fell forward from the impact against his back and gave an unsightly scream.

“Hey, you!!!!!”

Sieon’s roar was delivered to his face through the vibrations in his chest.

Jaeyoon’s eyeballs rolled while trying to calm down his anxious heart.

The man gave him a sense of fear by not sitting down and instead pacing back and forth and chain smoking stiffly, turning the house into a raccoon’s cave.

A little while ago, Jaeyoon, who’d shown chivalry and tried to help Inyoung out, had crashed into Sieon’s chest after being pushed by her. In the commotion, Sieon missed the damn woman running away. Shortly after, he couldn’t even pursue Inyoung because of the guard that came to check the situation and ask if they were okay.

Inyoung was a different kind of woman than Jaeyoon thought. She was a stalker who’d followed Sieon to his house, though he hadn’t told her about it. Jaeyoon’s breath caught when he heard the guard mumble about how, just the week before, she’d snuck into the house and attempted to commit suicide, saying ‘Sieon doesn’t know how I feel’ and making the living room a soaking mess with blood. She was an experienced person. What’s more, that suicide attempt was a complete show; she’d obtained the blood from somewhere and put a play all on her own, so whatever her feelings were, from the landlord’s – who had to suddenly throw out all his living room furniture – point of view, he was determined to kill her if she showed up again.

The fact that he let such an opponent into the house made Jaeyoon feel dizzy.

She looked normal… You can’t know the human mind, thought the 18-year-old boy. No, it’s just that birds of a feather flock together. Maybe they were of the same breed, Jaeyoon dared to think so in front of the man who’d teach him a lesson if he knew what was going on in his mind.

“Cough….”

He tried to hold it back but still let out a cough, so Jaeyoon opened his eyes roundly and covered his mouth. At the sound, Sieon stopped pacing and took out a pack of cigarettes from his pocket to smoke again.

Really, he was a guy who was tiring in many ways. Covering his mouth when he’d already let the cough out and his face going red when he was just barely suppressing it. What to do with this moron? If he kept causing trouble, the tired one here would be Sieon. Nevertheless, that beady-eyed expression suggesting he knew nothing was annoying.

Suddenly, Sieon remembered the kid’s suggestion from before he went out.

“Weakness….”

“Yes?!!”

Stop freaking out. This idiot was hurriedly shrinking his shoulders, foolishly rolling his eyes and biting his lips. Seeing his lips were starting to turn red with teeth marks, Sieon came up with a sure method.

“That exchange, let’s try it.”

“Yes?”

Before Jaeyoon could think what he meant, he was grabbed and dragged away. The place he was thrown with a plop was a soft mattress.

“????-”

“Undress.”

Jaeyoon couldn’t understand what he, who was untying his necktie, was saying. When he looked around the room he had entered for the first time, he just realized it was Sieon’s bedroom. When he undid the button at his neck, he instinctively crept back, fearing what other punishment this unpredictable man would resort to, besides strangling and locking him up.

“Let’s do it, the exchange.”

“Ah!!”

When Jaeyoon’s face returned color thinking he was finally getting freed, Sieon smiled slightly.

“Then, what should we do it with? Come to think of it, the sort of thing that others don’t know about– Why-why are you doing this?!!”

Jaeyoon shouted urgently when Sieon suddenly climbed up and grabbed his shoulders.

“Let’s make a secret that you definitely can’t tell others about.”

As he approached with a shark-like smile, Jaeyoon struggled on the bed, flapping about like a fish just stranded ashore. However, when Sieon, who had sufficient ability to subdue others, pressed Jaeyoon down in a few moves, the latter’s face bleached to the point where it could not be any whiter.

“I-I-I’m a man.”

“What about that?”

The answer was ‘what does it matter’. It was too plain a voice.

He had known from before that common sense doesn’t work on him at all, but it felt like he was completely out of his mind now. Sieon put his hand inside Jaeyoon’s clothes and quickly lifted his shirt.

He meant it, he really meant it! The man seemed to have thought up the [sure secret he can’t say to anyone else]. Jaeyoon wanted to cry. In fact, tears welled up.

“You-You do these kinds of things with the person you’re dating!”

“And so?”

“With a person you’re dating… you do this with a lover!!”

When he shouted as if he was on the verge of crying, Sieon suppressed a laugh. If anyone who knew him saw him now, the astonishment of that epoch-making tender smile would cause them to shout to the ends of the Earth or retreat 500 meters back. Jaeyoon, however, who was actually caught in this historical moment, didn’t have the leisure to care about his expression and was busy racking his brains for a way to avoid this crisis. Seizing the chance when the other stopped his actions of undressing him, he struggled, but the strength of the man’s grip was no joke.

“So we can just date then.”

“……?”

I beg your pardon?1

Blink, blink. As soon as he blankly blinked, the tears that were in his eyes rolled down his cheeks.

“Excuse me?”

“…….”

As Sieon’s hand tried to move again, Jaeyoon grabbed it tightly, looking straight at Sieon’s face for the first time.

Did he say to date just now? Was it that? Did I hear that right?

“… My mom will scold me.”

“Ha!”

“If I date a man, I think… I’ll really get scolded.”

“Exchange established.”

Sieon pulled up the corners of his mouth into a seemingly satisfied smile. Jaeyoon felt a chill gradually rising. Since you couldn’t tell just anyone that you were dating a man, it meant that he’d accepted Jaeyoon’s [a weakness for a weakness] proposal. When Sieon’s hand deviously came down to his pants, Jaeyoon urgently shouted again.

“You could just get over it instead!!!”

Jaeyoon was also out of his mind now, not even knowing what he was saying.

“You can just overcome stuff like cola. If you keep drinking it, you’ll become resistant, or just make it so it can’t get anywhere close to you, ban imports, or destroy the factory!!”

“Then will you do it?”

“Eh?”

“Get rid of that terrible poison from this world.”

It was like ‘justice’ delivered to the Warrior of Earth who wants to punish the evil forces.

“What?”

“Drink all of that damn poison and get rid of it.”

“Heop!”

“Date me. Or drink it?”

When he saw the cruel smile emerging on Sieon’s face, Jaeyoon foresaw a defeat.

“… Ah… Ouch….”

“I haven’t touched you yet.”

Sieon was slowly getting angry. Why are you acting like such a crybaby when I’m being this careful?

However, no matter how Sieon felt, in the face of the imminent crisis Jaeyoon’s mind seemed to have burned blank. Dexterously, the shirt fell under the bed, and the pants and underwear were pulled down. With Sieon’s figure in full view, he turned his head back and forth not knowing where to put his eyes, his head spinning with dizziness. His face heated up, feeling as if it was burning. Tears were ready to burst out anytime. When a big hand came between his legs, Jaeyoon’s eyes grew in size so much so they were ready to pop.

“Wai… Wait.”

“What now?”

That Sieon barely held on to his patience, Jaeyoon couldn’t know. How much he was enduring – although he didn’t spare the effort to peel off his clothes personally, this mugwort2 with zero dating experience shouted ‘wait’ with a frightened face whenever Sieon did something.

“I’m… a minor….”

“…….”

Yes, yes, it means nothing, right. I guess this kind of problem means nothing at all.

At his slightly frowning face, Jaeyoon closed his eyes as if he was sending even the last of his hope over the Jordan river.

What kind of common sense would work with a man who wanted to sleep with a man to catch the other’s weakness so he could protect his own secret? For Jaeyoon who didn’t want to be violated by a man, this could only be an unfair crisis, a hardship, and the ordeal of a lifetime.

“Heok!!”

He stopped breathing when an unfamiliar thing came into the part he had not even touched with his own hands.

As the pain beyond one’s imagination came, his vision turned white and the cells all over his body throbbed and screamed.

He was just breathing out and didn’t make any sounds with his gaping mouth.

Absent-minded for a while after opening his eyes, Jaeyoon soon realized that he had lost consciousness. He lay alone on the wide bed. When he felt the sharp pain between his hips, Jaeyoon buried his face into the pillow.

He’d been violated.

He was rather thankful for having lost consciousness and not being able to remember it, but the fact that he’d been shockingly violated by a man didn’t change and made Jaeyoon want to cry. He shouldn’t have felt a flutter that night. He shouldn’t have admired him for being so handsome. Heaven was also thoughtless; why give that sort of face to someone of that substance? Jaeyoon hugged the pillow and struggled.

“Not getting up?”

Not knowing since when he’d been watching, he heard the voice of the man he didn’t really want to see right now. As his struggling motions suddenly stiffened into the position of a prostrate frog, Sieon, who had been watching for a while, smirked without a sound.

I can totally see what this idiot is thinking. It was obvious he was regretting having been violated. It became interesting for some reason, so Sieon decided not to tell the truth.

Whenever he put his hand on the frightened fellow, he flinched like a rabbit in front of a tiger. A fellow with a pale and thin body and zero experience on the topic – it was normal not to have experience at that age, but it didn’t get through to Sieon – had fallen asleep even before it started. He’d thought of pouring water on him or just going through with it like that, but after a while, the guy even started snoring. He’d obviously fallen into a deep sleep, which dumbfounded Sieon. He was dying to say, ‘Just you try waking up’ , but when he did actually wake up, he floundered into the sea of delusions all on his own.

“Not going home?”

He asked again – it was more of a command than an enquiry – but to him, it was a very kind question.

“… going.”

From the moment he knew Sieon was in the same room, Jaeyoon, whose whole body went beetroot red, was unable to even lift his face, so he muttered in a faint voice. It looked like a caterpillar wriggling inside the sheets.

“I saw it all already, so what’re you hiding?”

“!!!-”

Indeed, he was a fun guy to tease. After pausing for a bit, he started wriggling again and groping for clothes. Sieon, who was still watching, went out of the room regretfully when his cell phone rang.

Jaeyoon was hypersensitive to his every sound, so, right after Sieon left, he jumped out, picked up some clothes and hurriedly started putting them on. In Jaeyoon’s head, the thought of wanting to get out of this situation as soon as possible dominated. After dressing up in a jiffy, he turned and saw Sieon standing at the bedroom door, causing him to scream ‘Keuheok!’ out loud. He felt like a debtor caught by his creditor after having run off.

“I’ll take you home.”

“N-No need, there’s still a bus, I-I can go alone.”

Evasive, Jaeyoon stuttered that he’d use the bus which ran close to midnight.

“It’s okay between lovers. You’re also not feeling well, right?”

“!!!”

“I have to go out anyway, so I’ll drop you off on the way.”

The enormous generosity, which would make his friends fall over if they witnessed it, came as an ordeal to Jaeyoon. The phrases ‘lovers’ or ‘not feeling well’ which were deliberately stressed were words he never wanted to hear. When he heard them, his until-then perfectly fine body suddenly felt like it wasn’t. He just wanted to plop down and cry ‘uwang~’ like a child, but fortunately his typical South Korean male pride prevented at least that much.

On the whole way home, both of them were silent. Sieon sped madly down the road in the dead of night, and Jaeyoon held his seat belt tightly, just staring out the window.

When the car pulled over in front of the familiar alley, Jaeyoon bowed and tried to get off.

“Hey.”

“Yes-yes!!!”

Jaeyoon’s shoulders tensed up. His body was pulled with a jerk and he gave a groan of pain. His heart leapt at the lips that soon covered Jaeyoon’s as if they wanted to swallow them.

“!!!!-”

TN:

1) I beg your pardon? – was in English in the raws

2) mugwort – The specific Korean word means someone who has no dating experience, ie. is green at dating, but it’s meant in an offensive way.