i was my mistake

I am my mistake Author: Yinniang in troubled times

Summary:

1996, a turbulent era.

The man who committed suicide returns from 26 years later.

Even if she becomes a girl, she still wants to save and change the future of her other self.

It's just a little unexpected that my past self is also slowly becoming a girl...

[Book from Hundred]

"The novel is everyday life."

"Wedge" is hopeless in this life

0. This life is hopeless

The unshaven man was standing on the roof. Although it was almost June, the cold wind blowing from the roof still made him shiver.

This is an 'old dilapidated building'.

That is, the so-called old buildings.

But even here, you need to pay expensive rent.

Just because this is S city.

Even the roof doesn't feel high.

Surrounded by tall buildings, this reinforced concrete city cannot make people feel the slightest warmth.

The idea of ​​'death' has already been born in his heart.

And not a day or two.

The long quarantine, the expensive food prices, and even the credit card limit after the savings are exhausted...

He knows that there are too many mistakes in his life.

It is precisely because of these that he lives in such an unsatisfactory state.

But he didn't even dare to die.

He looked downstairs quietly, and couldn't even figure out what he was living for.

No money, no house, no girlfriend...

Nothing, nothing.

The rented place is poor, remote, depressing...

He felt that he was not even as chic as the security guards who were bossing around at the door.

The man picked up the phone, and the red date on the lock screen looked like blood about to flow.

"2022, May 5th."

He wanted to find someone to send a message to, but he found at a loss that he seemed to have no friends who could say these words.

The best friend who used to be able to talk to him all night, also changed with life-became looking down on him, becoming no longer patient and comforting, and finally, no longer communicating with him.

The loud phone rang.

The man stared at the word "landlord" for a long time, and finally chose to answer.

He didn't speak, just listening to the voice of the person on the other end of the phone.

"Hello? Ye Chen, it's time for you to pay the rent, and one has already been delayed..."

The man didn't hang up the phone, but silently threw the phone away, and then his legs no longer supported his body, allowing him to fall forward.

In the ears, the wind howled.

"Crash-"

For the first time he felt free.

He knew that his life would come to an end, and that his life, which was made up of countless mistakes, could finally stop.

He rarely felt happy.

If it happened again, he might be able to do something, but there is no regret in life.

In just a short moment, he thought too much.

"I don't know what dad was thinking when he jumped off the building." He felt as if he was talking to himself, but this was probably just an illusion.

"Boom!"

In his ears, he clearly heard the sound of his body falling suddenly.

But no pain.

The brain almost went blank.

His world should have returned to nothingness just like that.

But obviously, the world didn't intend to let him go.

He tried to open his eyes, feeling as if he had opened them, but also as if he was still in a dream.

In front of my eyes was a bunch of bizarre and distorted lines.

Something was flickering, like a heartbeat.

But he felt that he probably didn't have any heartbeat at this time.

Maybe the brain isn't dead yet.

But the rest of his organs must have died.

Stop struggling.

he thought to himself mockingly.

However, his brain seems to want to continue his life.

This is probably the so-called biological instinct.

But now he is like a broken TV, unable to display any normal pictures at all.

He began to gradually feel as if a vortex appeared in front of his eyes, and his whole body felt a strong sense of falling.

Even normal thinking ability begins to be lost and memory begins to blur, like a computer with a damaged disk.

But then, many memories suddenly became clear again.

He felt as if he was traveling upstream in the long river of time.

I saw more of my younger self, and saw my life from years ago.

From stepping into the society, being humiliated by the boss, fired by the boss, to studying night school diligently, then to failing the college entrance examination, and then to high school...

When these memories go back to when he was three years old, he goes back and starts normal progress again.

Finally, it was fixed in his third year of high school.

All the pictures keep fading away.

He seemed to hear the gears of the times turning, he seemed to feel the setting sun of the old century shining on him, and he seemed to smell the choking smell of the gray smoke.

The hazy, dream-like world is gradually becoming clear...

……

"Prologue" reunited with myself

1. Encounter

[img=600,800]https://rss.sfacg.com/web/novel/images/UploadPic/2022/09/854eddd8-4eb3-4b5e-a0e0-d37c92c00a26.jpg[/img]

(One)

The old electric fan was making a 'creaking' sound, and the thick curtains left only a gap for light.

There was a cracked glass plate on the peeling desk, and there were some books on it, but it seemed that a few pages had not been turned.

"Uh..." Ye Chen woke up in a trance.

The expensive teaching materials for the third year of high school are already full of saliva.

He wiped the corner of his mouth, but ignored the wet book.

This is the last summer vacation of high school.

The third year of high school is coming soon, but his mind doesn't seem to be on it.

Because too many things have happened at home recently, it is difficult for him to calm down except when he is sleeping.

But in the dream just now, he dreamed of a pure and lovely girl.

Just standing by the river in the park that was just built, but still looks a bit barren.

He looked at her, and she turned her head and smiled at him with her lips pursed.

He bent down and took out the book he treasured from the cabinet.

I asked my father to buy it at a pedestrian street that specializes in Japanese products.

Although the above is all Japanese, but because there are many pictures, it can be roughly understood.

——This is the setting set of EVA.

He likes Rei Ayanami in it the most, and hates the savage "Miss" Asuka the most.

If you read a lot, the book also has memory.

So every time he opened it, he could see the rare smiling picture of the unsmiling girl.

At this time, he felt as if his soul had been healed by something.

"Crack - click - click."

The old electric fan suddenly released a puff of green smoke, and the fan blades stopped slowly and stopped moving.

"It's finally broken..." Ye Chen was not surprised at all, but was a little emotional.

He unplugged the fan conveniently, and stood up muttering to himself: "It's so hot, let's go out for a stroll..."

In fact, he wanted to go to the river in that park.

The reason why he always dreams about it is because he has read a novel, the river described in it is very similar to the one there, and the hero in it will meet different girls every time he goes there...

Although he is about to be in his third year of high school, because the month is relatively young, he is actually not yet sixteen years old. In his immature heart, he always harbors many unrealistic fantasies.

Probably because of this, they are willing to believe in the most romantic thing in the world, and have the courage to create the so-called 'romantic'.

"Let's go to the river to escape the summer heat." He muttered, grabbing the package of country bumpkin chicken legs on the table, intending to take it with him as a delicious meal for himself while blowing the wind by the river.

The evening sun is sinking, but it seems to be covered with a thin layer of veil.

It was the smoke that the factory was clearing.

……

(two)

The sight in front of the man's eyes was finally clear, and what caught his eyes was the sunset that seemed extraordinarily large.

There was a bit of bewilderment on his face, as if he didn't know where he was.

Looking up, there is a gray-blue sky that is both familiar and unfamiliar. Turning around, it is a park that is similar to the memory, but it is much newer than the impression.

The chimney of the factory was still billowing with thick smoke, but some memories in her subconscious told her that it would not be long before that chimney would stop emitting any smoke.