i was my mistake

"Hey, I'm not too hungry anymore."

"It's really you." Yi was annoyed by her, "Then let's cook some porridge, I'm too lazy to work."

"...anything is fine."

The lives of ordinary people are always repetitive and monotonous. There may not be "stories" happening every day, but life does continue.

The whole day is pretty much devoted to studying, occasionally getting up and relaxing, but quickly getting back into it.

Zhao Jinyu didn't come today, probably because he went out, or he wanted to study quietly for a while.

Whether she came to study with them, or she studied alone, people, sometimes like to be lively, and sometimes like to be alone, these are normal.

It was only about four o'clock, and it was already evening.

The orange-red sunset sprinkled light like watermelon juice into the house, but it was no longer as warm as it was at noon.

"It's going to be night again, day by day, it's going too fast." Wan Qing looked out of the window with her cheeks on her hands, shaking her legs lightly, "Oh, yes, Ye Chen, put away your clothes, Why hang there when the sun is almost gone.”

"You take it..." Ye Chen said without raising his head, he was scribbling on the draft paper, writing down a series of formulas and numbers in a 'shuashua'.

Seeing that she was so serious, Wan Qing suppressed what she was about to say just now, and put away the clothes by herself with a clothes fork.

In fact, I don’t wear many clothes on weekdays. I just go back and forth with those few school uniforms and undergarments. I occasionally wash my warm coats—but that’s basically only once every half a month. Unlike School uniforms, if they feel dirty, will even be washed once every three days.

"Huha——! It's done!"

"Excited for you—Ye Chen, is this school uniform yours?"

"Let me see? Uh... the bigger one is mine, should it be mine?"

"The zipper of your school uniform is broken, what's going on, didn't you find it yourself?"

"Is there?" Ye Chen leaned over suspiciously, "Ah...it seems to be disconnected, what should I do, if the zipper cannot be pulled up, I will freeze to death."

"Make up."

"I don't know how to mend... Is there a tailor shop near us that mends clothes?"

Wan Qing rolled her big eyes: "I mend it myself. Where's the needle and thread from the previous house? Do you remember where you put it?"

"It seems...it seems...in our room?" Ye Chen looked suspiciously at Wan Qing, "Didn't you say you don't know how to sew?"

"When did I say that?"

"Just yesterday."

"Oh... Then I won't, you make it up yourself."

"Hello!"

"If you make it ugly, don't look for me."

"It seems that you really don't know much..."

"When a person lives alone and has no money to buy a new one, or even find someone else to replace it, he can only do it himself. After a long time, he is more or less skilled. Let me be humble, you really think I can't do it. Yes, really..."

"Then just say it straight!" Ye Chen didn't know whether to laugh or cry.

……

53. Stitch by thread

Although it was already evening, the sun was not as bright as at noon, but the brightness of the setting sun was still enough. Wan Qing hugged the dress, moved a small bench, and sat under the slanting sun. The chair she usually sat on was her at this time. workbench.

Ye Chen got out from under the bed in disgrace, and took out a dusty biscuit box.

Of course it's not biscuits in it—

It contained the needles and threads that my mother used to mend clothes.

"Hey, there's a lot of dust." Ye Chen blew lightly, and the new and old dust flew up in the setting sun.

When I opened the box, there was a small glass plate with my mother's fingerprints on it.

Although she has passed away, there are traces of her past everywhere.

"Oh...this glass plate is placed here." Ye Chen said happily, and took out the glass plate, "I said that I couldn't find it later...how could it be put here? "

"Mom used it when she cut the cloth, so let's put it together by the way." Wan Qing said flatly, but it was very difficult for her eyes to move away from the glass plate that carried many memories.

In the past, the table at home was made of poor materials, because my father found some wood scraps and assembled it. The surface of the table is not only rough, but also has some unevenness. It was uncomfortable, so my mother picked up an extra small glass plate from her factory, and used it as a pad under the homework book to facilitate Ye Chen's writing.

As I grew older and time passed, the family gradually became able to afford good furniture, and after getting a new table, the glass panel was put away.

Ye Chen originally thought it had been lost, but he didn't expect it to be hidden in his mother's sewing box.

Both of them had expressions on their faces.

Wan Qing became a little silent, and just quietly picked up a tube of thin white thread suitable for repairing zippers, with a thin needle poked on it, and it was strung together with the end of the thread.

This is my mother's habit of using needlework. Because there is no special storage box, I will thread the thread again after each use. But this time I don't cut the thread, just poke the needle directly on the thread, so as not to use it again next time. Sometimes it takes half a day to find where the thread ends are.

"Get a clean rag and wet it, wipe the box clean, dust is flying everywhere." Wan Qing raised her head slightly, looked at Ye Chen with drooping eyelids, "Silly standing still, I can't find it by myself." What are you doing?"

"Don't use my mother's classic lines, okay..." Ye Chen rolled his eyes, muttered in a low voice, and ran to the living room in a hurry.

"Can you use the rag to wipe the wine cabinet—!" She yelled in the living room, and then she probably remembered that her father was still sleeping soundly, then lowered her voice for a moment, and gently poked half of her head into the bedroom , shaking the rag in his hand, "...is this okay?"

"Well, okay, put some newspapers on the floor, don't get it everywhere."

"Hey, is the newspaper you bought yesterday okay?"

"Okay." Wan Qing didn't raise her head, she was holding the thread and weaving through the air at the moment, as if it was some kind of ritual before the official start—but in fact, she was just rediscovering the feeling.

After all, I haven't touched these things for some time.

When Wan Qing finally decided to start, Ye Chen also spread layers of newspapers on the ground, and then wiped them carefully as if facing a treasure.

"Speaking of which, mom hasn't called for a while."

"Perhaps it's not so easy to make a phone call across time and space." Wan Qing's eyelashes were coated with a layer of golden red under the setting sun, which looked extraordinarily beautiful.

"Oh yes."

Wan Qing didn't speak any more, she lowered her head and carefully threaded the needle. In her eyes, that seemed to be the whole world at this moment.

It is said that a dedicated person will have a special charm, but Wan Qing always looks like a fool, although she pursues a little, but not much, even if she wants to change, she tends to shrink back when she encounters setbacks, and she can't wait to be hurt when she is hurt. The whole world is about to be destroyed...

But at this time she was really beautiful.

It's not the outside, but an indescribable temperament.

How to put it, it's as if you saw a time bomb that was counting down. When the countdown ended, it didn't explode, but an alarm sounded. After carefully observing the crystal-clear material, it turned out that It's not a bomb, but a carefully crafted and ingenious work of art by an artist.

Time seemed to be at a standstill at this moment, Ye Chen wiped the biscuit box in his hand, raised his small face, and stared at her intently.

The needle dragging the long thread moved in and out beside the zipper without any haste, and her hands also fluttered up and down.

"Hiss—" She suddenly gasped, and squeezed out two drops of bright blood from her fingertips.

She put the pad of her finger in her mouth and sucked it hard, then licked it lightly, as if nothing happened, and continued to thread the needle—just slightly lifted the finger that was accidentally punctured by the needle .

From the beginning to the end, she didn't say anything, and she didn't show anything. Perhaps it was the same as this small wound. Many times she felt that it was not in the way, so she endured it silently.

It wasn't until there were more and more wounds that they exploded like a holed balloon:

Hitting the world hard, hurting others and hurting yourself.

But after this is over, if she is still alive, she will silently put plaster on the wound, endure the pain and continue to live.

"Tsk!" Bad luck seemed to be upon her all of a sudden, and the fingertip that had been injured just now was poked again, so she could only lift that finger high, raising her hand from time to time to suck the fingertip There wasn't much blood on it.

Ye Chen saw that her eyes were slightly red, it wasn't any emotion, it was just a pure physiological reaction.

If what was in front of her right now was not a frail young girl, but a rough-skinned and thick-skinned uncle, then she probably wouldn't be able to see any fragile expression on Yi's body.

When the whole thread was used up, she tried to pull it, and found it was strong enough, she nodded with satisfaction, with a somewhat smug expression on her face, then turned over the school uniform again, and found the seam of the cuff, here Some of the thread has come off, and if it is not re-sewn, it will be broken in due time.

"How do you wear your school uniform?" She squinted her eyes, pressed the end of the thread with her warm lips, making it soft and moist, and then seriously threaded it into the pinhole, but the setting sun was a little skewed, It made her a little bit confused about where the pinhole was, "I dressed you like an Iraq war-damaged version..."

"Just wear it like this." Ye Chen looked innocent.

"Calm down a bit, okay?"

"This should be good for you..."

"Tsk."

There was another silence, until Wan Qing re-threaded the needle, she started to get busy again, probably because she was too focused, so that it took a while to finish a sentence, "I said, if, there is... ...and someday, I- die, don't waste your money... um... um? um... almost misaligned..."

"What?" Ye Chen was panicked by her, and couldn't help asking.

"what?"

"You just now."

"Oh, I said, if I die."

"Why do you say this?"

"People are always going to die."

"But that's too early for you."

"Who knows." Wan Qing said openly, "It's good to have a chat, if you really die, lest I have to return to the light to explain the funeral."

"Tch, what if I die first?"

"Oh, you die first, you can die first, do you have any requirements for the funeral or after-death arrangements?"

"Who would think about this kind of thing..." Ye Chen seemed to be particularly resistant to talking about this kind of topic about death, "Why are you talking about this, it's so boring."

"It's not boring at all. Isn't it interesting to imagine what happens after death?"

"Aren't you afraid of dying?"

"I'm afraid...or maybe I'm not afraid, who knows." She shrugged, flattened the clothes, looked for the places that needed to be mended again, and her speech became more fluent, "But if you are afraid of death, you can't talk about death. Ah? No matter how you avoid it, some things should always come.”

"Uh……"

"Just like some parents, when their children go to school, they don't let their children fall in love early, and they urge them to get married as soon as they enter the society. The process of exploring and finding love and desire is completely omitted, because they are afraid that talking at that time will make the children separate. I don’t want to study hard, but so what, I still have to come, and I don’t know how to deal with it when I meet it. Well, many children will be like this in the future, those post-[-]s, Children born in the [-]s scold adults born in the [-]s and [-]s like us, but... how should I put it, when we were young, most of us didn’t like adults treating us like this.”

"what……"

"People will always become the person they hate the most. From a person whose heart is closed to a person who closes the hearts of others, it's really strange."

"Okay, so how are you going to die?"

"Oh? I mean just burn me to ashes and throw me into the sea after I die. Remember to stay away from Japan. I'm allergic to radiation."

"Uh...huh?" Ye Chen obviously didn't understand Wan Qing's 'joke'.

"In terms of death, if people can know when they die, I will drive my own car - I hope I have one at that time. If I have one, I should buy it when I was young. If I die of old age, then That car should also be scrapped, so I drove the car that should be scrapped, stepped on the gas pedal to the bottom, and rushed into the sea to meet the coming death.”

"Why?"

"Don't you think it's... How should I put it, it's very romantic? I really want to die like this, but unfortunately, people's birth and death are things that cannot be decided by themselves."

"Who said that, didn't you just decide once?"

"Except for suicide."

"Aren't you committing suicide by driving your car into the sea?"

"It doesn't count, it counts as natural death."

"What kind of natural death..."

"That's called—embracing death, or welcoming death?"

"I have no idea what you're thinking..."

"Then don't understand." Wan Qing stood up with a 'crash', "Okay, I fixed it for you, you have to pay attention to it in the future, the last year... er, half a year, don't break it again, After half a year, I won’t wear it anymore, and it’s up to you to burn it or sell it for scrap.”

"It's not necessary to be so extreme..."

"I'm tired, you can make dinner today."

"Would you like Master Yin or Sanxian Yimen..."

"Fry a poached egg!"

"Less likely……"