Nuke Miko: Chronicles of America

And the story of the creation of the world by the FSM Cult after alcoholism, and the myth of the beer nightclub paradise, no matter how funny and outrageous, at least it confirms His status as the leader of the Creation God, and is popular all over the world. It has been widely disseminated, and there is also a large ready-made group of believers in the United States.

——No matter how happy and free the believers of the FSM religion are, this influence is real after all.

In addition, the image of the FSM cult is also very positive. Although everyone thinks it is absurd and funny, it is difficult to dig out any black material.

In addition, FSM is not a monotheistic religion, at least not denying the existence of other gods.

Therefore, under the seat of the flying surface monster, many other gods can be accommodated, and theoretically it can continue to expand.

In addition, there is a more troublesome problem in front of Tamamo: she is not a native god in the United States, and she is somewhat alienated from this country.

In this way, before he really took over a piece of land and took over the mountain as king, the ancient fox god couldn't take the lead by himself.

In other words, in order to take root and develop, she must first embrace her thighs.

In contrast, in the United States, there seems to be no powerful god who is more eloquent than the flying noodles god, right?

It has to be said that although the appearance of the Flying Noodle God is very low in SAN value, his temper is very gentle and tolerant. After a while, everyone will eat another bowl of noodles, and it will be regarded as an official part-time job in the Flying Noodle Cult.

"...In other words, we have to dress up as female pirates next? Can we just wear this pirate hat?"

Qiu Shanhui looked at the pirate tricorn hat Chen Qiuhan handed over, as well as the female pirate's skull-patterned bust wrap and a miniskirt that could cover her buttocks. She always felt that if she went to the street wearing this thing, she would definitely be gone, "... I think it’s more appropriate for me to wear a maiden costume.”

"... Whatever you want, you can dress up however you want, as long as you have some pirate elements on your body, it doesn't matter if you don't have any."

Chen Qiuhan curled her lips, "...Because, the Lord doesn't care (whether it's cooked or not)!"

Next, according to orthodox Flying Spaghetti teachings, the communion, or "divine body," should be spaghetti with meatballs and mashed potatoes.

But in order to take into account the belief of Inari God (Tamazamo), everyone discussed and planned to choose Nissin’s fox udon noodles (fried tofu instant noodles) as the holy meal of the church—first of all, because of the flying noodle god Among the believers who teach in North America, a large part of them are coders, programmers and otaku who are cooking idiots. The kitchen in the apartment is basically a decoration, and they can only survive on instant noodles and pizza.

Secondly, because in the advertisement of Nissin Company, the little vixen played by Yoshioka Riho is really super cute...

Next, Chen Qiuhan took out the high-end photographic equipment that he treasured, and took a standard promotional photo of [Mian Mian Cult].

——The fox-eared priestess Akiyama Megumi, wearing a red and white priestess costume and a pirate hat, sat in front of the flag of the Flying Spaghetti Cult, drinking beer and eating fox udon noodles, while playing "The Age of Discovery" on a laptop, The tail of a fox is erected behind the back, and a fat cat is lying on its lap...

Well, the stitching style of the three teachings in one is strange, but it does look cute.

PS: The former Thai girl will actually become a supernatural person, and she is scheduled to be the god of death.

The girls in this article are basically femme fatales, and there are not many silly little princesses.

Some readers suggested that I write about Scientology. This, although Scientology was once all the rage, it has declined rapidly in the past ten years because of defrauding money and sex. Now the total number of believers in the world is less than 2. There is no way to compare it with Feitian Pasta.

Also, the Church of Scientology, although founded in Los Angeles, has moved its headquarters to Florida — where the Reiki has not been revived.

Chapter 89: My family is in the underworld business

After a whole set of nonsensical matters such as uniforms, sacraments, and standard photos have been tossed about, everyone then talked about the real and down-to-earth business.

Specifically, in the new scene of spiritual recovery, how to explore new ways of fighting, identify the pain points of the people, lay out new tracks, establish a new missionary center, understand the minds of the American people, form a joint force in the battle, and deploy new The missionary matrix, to break the circle of the face-to-face religious order, and to realize the flattening and decentralization of religious organizations...so as to publicize this new god system composed of foxes, cats, and noodles?

Megumi Akiyama, who has been an Internet celebrity for a few weeks by making cat movies and dancing, immediately wants to repeat the old tricks, borrow chickens to lay eggs, and directly use the existing flying pasta gods to shoot another episode The excellent video of Flying Apsaras descending, calling on believers to worship.

But Chen Qiuhan said that this is useless at all, with advanced technology now, even if he shoots a video of God's descent, it will only be considered as a special effect.

Unless the God of Flying Spaghetti is actually sent to every believer's computer screen - which is simply not possible!

Because the aura concentration in the greater Los Angeles area is not high enough at present, the flying spaghetti monster cannot appear outside the aura.

Of course, all of you freshly released transcendents can also choose to actively reveal their abilities and manifest themselves in front of others.

But if you don't want to arouse negative perceptions, this matter is just like the birth of a superhero. It is best to have a positive reason.

Originally, today's Los Angeles is full of earthquakes and riots, and the plague is pervasive, and people are in panic. This is a good opportunity to save all sentient beings.

However, the three gods of the Maohumian family of the Mianmian Cult are not very good at healing, and they cannot save the people from the disease, and at the same time, they cannot predict the next disaster or blessing-the early recovery of the spiritual energy, the chaos of the heavens, nothing No matter how powerful the generation is, it is difficult to predict the future!

Right now, I don't know where there is a super villain who can use it to beat Liwei. It is really difficult to establish a positive image of my own god.

——Without little monsters coming out to be beaten, Ultraman would not be a hero!Maybe he will be hostile, guarded against and entrapped by others!

If it is in those poor places where there is a famine and people cannibalize each other, with the power of the Flying Spaghetti God to turn faith and spiritual power into food, it may be possible to attract many believers.But in the United States of America, where the poor are generally overweight and fat is everywhere... food manufacturing is also unattractive.

"...Anyway, now relying on the [Gift of Cooking], we can all fly, or else, start with simple things, be a vigilante like Spiderman, go to downtown Los Angeles to fight crime, and accumulate fame? Spiderman Isn’t there a famous saying called [with great power comes great responsibility]?”

After scratching his head and thinking hard for a long time, "Flying Noodles" Chen Qiuhan barely came up with an idea, "...Los Angeles is very chaotic now."

"...This kind of poisonous chicken soup for the soul that capitalists use to deceive fools, you, a rich second generation, actually believe it?"

Qiu Shanhui put on a pair of beady eyes, and looked at Chen Qiuhan with a look of "Your IQ is in arrears, please renew it as soon as possible", "...the boy who said this in a high-sounding way, his adoptive father died, and his girlfriend almost told me People run away, exhausted to death every day, but still have no money, no status, nothing..."

"...Okay! My fault, this idea is really not very good. But now there are no monsters born, and we can't find a place to use it!"

Chen Qiuhan, who didn't believe this nonsense, readily admitted his mistake before Qiu Shanhui finished speaking.

"...I can't let Buster, the cat god, transform into a giant [Meowthra], set off from the bottom of the sea to destroy the Golden Gate Bridge in San Francisco, and then we fly over there and call for a thief, right? If this goes wrong, we will If you want to become the head of a cult, everyone will call and beat you."

"...There really aren't any demons born here in Los Angeles. There is a black voodoo priest from Haiti in San Francisco who claims to be able to use evil methods to drive the dead to jump. If you really can't find a way to become famous, maybe you can find That nigga monster named [Di Dee] fights..."

Akiyama Megumi thought for a while and said, "...But Voodoo is an old-fashioned cult, especially good at cursing. Under the background of the recovery of spiritual energy, it is hard to say what kind of power will emerge. If there is no need, we'd better Don't offend the voodoo religion rashly, lest you provoke a powerful enemy in vain..."

Before she finished speaking, she heard her cell phone ring.

Picking it up, it turned out to be her grandma Masako Akiyama's number, which surprised Megumi Akiyama.

——Including the daylight saving time implemented in the United States, the time in Los Angeles is [-] hours slower than that in Kanto, Japan.

Now it is four o'clock in the afternoon in Los Angeles, so it is twelve o'clock in the middle of the night in Fukushima Prefecture, the hometown of Megumi Akiyama.

Megumi Akiyama's grandmother, Masako Akiyama, has always had a regular schedule, getting up early and going to bed early. How could she remember to call her granddaughter in the middle of the night?

If it was the Los Angeles earthquake a few days ago, Akiyama Masako might have called overnight because she was worried about her granddaughter's safety.But at that time, Akiyama Megumi had just fled to a place with a mobile phone signal, and had already called grandma to report her safety... So what happened to today's phone call?

This gave Akiyama Megumi an ominous premonition in an instant.

Sure enough, after she connected the phone, what she heard was not grandma's voice, but a business-like, cold female voice, informing her of the bad news.

——Akiyama Megumi's grandma, Akiyama Masako, was infected with the COVID-19 virus and unfortunately fell ill on the streets of Fukushima City today.

At the time, she was attending a memorial service for an old friend who also died of COVID-19.

What's more terrible is that Masako Akiyama's speed from onset to severe illness was so fast that she died before the ambulance arrived...

Hearing that her only relative in Japan was separated from nature and people without warning, Akiyama Hui couldn't help but feel dizzy for a while.

By the time the call was over, she had already fallen to the ground, tears streaming down her face.

——Although at the beginning of time travel, Akiyama Megumi was somewhat estranged from this strange new family, and was full of complaints about the plight of poverty.

But with the passage of time, the current Akiyama Megumi has long regarded Akiyama Masako, who has worked so hard to raise her, as her grandmother.

Originally, when Megumi Akiyama achieved extraordinary achievements, he thought that after working hard to make a world here in the United States, he would bring his grandma to enjoy the blessings.

Unexpectedly, her career in the United States has not improved yet, and the grandmother Masako Akiyama from her hometown in Fukushima County suddenly returned to the underworld.

Everything was so sudden, so unexpected, without any mental preparation.

And because of the blockade of international routes caused by the epidemic in the United States, Megumi Akiyama couldn't even fly back to China for the funeral, and finally looked at grandma again!

What a heart-wrenching and huge blow that the son wants to support but the relative is not there!

For a moment, the little witch Akiyama Hui only felt that the world was spinning, and all thoughts were lost. She couldn't even get excited about spreading beliefs and expanding her strength.

When the other girls heard about this, they all hugged and touched Akiyama Hui to show comfort, and some gave Akiyama Hui a handkerchief to wipe their tears.

Finally, when it was Chen Qiuhan's turn, he reached out and handed over a stack of neat and tidy paper prints, and said to Qiu Shanhui, "...I can understand your grief, because my grandma passed away not long ago. Death, so please still mourn.

If you feel really sad, you might as well burn these to your grandma, it can be regarded as a filial piety..."

At first, Akiyama Megumi thought that what Chen Qiuhan handed over was a tissue, but after hearing these words, he realized it was not.

Looking down carefully, Akiyama Hui couldn't help being surprised, his eyes widened, "...Issued by Tiandi Bank? One hundred trillion Ming notes? Or the English version, with Kennedy's face printed on it? Am I right? ? Brother! Why do you have this thing in your house?"

"...Because this is my company's product, even if I come to the United States, I still have to advertise for my family." Chen Qiuhan replied.

"...This ghost note...was printed by your company?" Qiu Shanhui was stunned and even more surprised.

"...Yeah, didn't I tell you guys before? My family is in the underworld business, selling these things that are burned for the dead."

Chen Qiuhan rubbed his nose and explained a little awkwardly, "...the company is located in Mibeizhuang, Baoding, Hebei..."

Chapter 90, Looking for contacts from the underworld

Although Chen Qiuhan, as a wealthy second-generation small boss with a lot of money in his family, has three houses in Shanghai, an entire building in Qingdao, and a newly renovated small villa in Irvine, Los Angeles, but his family's company It is located in Mibeizhuang, Baoding, Hebei.

Although this place is not well-known, it has monopolized 90% of the world's currency issuance, and is known as the world's number one financial center of the underworld!

Because the JFK issued by Mi Beizhuang has sold well in North America in recent years, so it is called Hell Wall Street on the Internet.

The locals call Mibeizhuang "a street of the dead": [-] wholesalers of funeral supplies have gathered in just one kilometer of the street!

In Mibeizhuang, a magical place, clerks generally put an urn on their desks to hold ballpoint pens, and the refrigerated ice coffins where the corpses are placed are stuffed with watermelons before they are sold.Employees wear filial piety to welcome customers, and there are not only Hades villas and cars in the store, but also more fashionable three-piece apple suits to burn to the ancestors.

It can be seen that China not only has the most developed manufacturing industry in the world, but also has the most developed manufacturing industry in the world.

It is the factory of the world for the living, and it is also the factory of the world for the dead—at the same time, it is also a monopoly giant in the financial industry of the underworld!

Then, since Mibeizhuang has such a well-developed underworld manufacturing industry, it is necessary to find a vast dead man's market for this massive underworld commodity.

This is the nature of capitalism!It is also the innate instinct of any capitalist!

However, in recent years, the country has not only continued to crack down on feudal superstition in accordance with the long-standing tradition of governance, but also chanted the slogan of controlling air pollution and preventing wildfires. The provinces have repeatedly issued documents prohibiting or restricting people from burning paper to worship their ancestors during Qingming, Chongyang and Spring Festival.

As a result, the domestic market for the above-mentioned underworld commodities has not only failed to prosper with the country's economic development, but has shrunk somewhat. In addition, there are many funeral practitioners and the competition in the dead market is fierce. A group of underworld capitalists.

It's just that the arms can't twist the crane arm of the dragon gate, and the mere capitalists in the underworld can't handle the government in the underworld.

Seeing that there is no way to count on the domestic market, then we can only try to promote Mingbi to go overseas and strive to develop overseas markets.

Mingbi not only belongs to China, but also belongs to the whole world!

Let China's Ming coins sell well all over the world and penetrate into the underworld of all countries in the world!

Make sure that every foreign ghost has the freedom to use Chinese ghost coins!

Therefore, in recent years, there have been many videos and articles on the overseas networks in Europe and the United States introducing Mingbi. Those foreign Internet celebrities who focus on occultism have given various English names to Mingbi.Such as ancestormoney (ancestor money), josspaper (Buddha paper).

Then came up with a lot of derivative words, like Hellbank (Hell Bank), Heavenbank (Paradise Bank) and so on.

These European and American bloggers who introduced burning "ancestor money" on the Internet not only introduced the burning method of Mingbi, but also tried their best to publicize the effect of burning Mingbi for ancestors.

Some people say that they burned "ancestral money" to their ancestors today, and then won the lottery tomorrow, directly wealth and freedom.

Some people say that after burning the "ancestral money" to the ancestors, they got the ancestors' dreams and unearthed the antique coins buried in the backyard of the ancestors.

There are also people who say that after burning the "ancestor money" for their ancestors, they were unscathed in two car accidents when they went out, but their companions saw their ancestors on the spot...

And Mibeizhuang also timely launched English, French, Russian, Arabic and other languages, and simulated coins in multiple currency units such as Euro, US dollar, and dinar, so as to meet market demand and control the financial order of the underworld.And it also introduces the old and brings forth the new, accepting ghost coins for customized quotas and avatars.

So far, the first step of Mingbi's going to sea has been successfully completed, and Pu is very happy!

It not only made the underworld capitalists in Mibeizhuang earn money, but also successfully realized the export of Chinese traditional (underworld) culture in a certain sense.

Compared with the Confucius Institute, which burns a lot of money and has a lot of troubles, but the effect is hard to describe in a word, this kind of cultural output can be said to be small investment, quick results, enthusiastic response, and subtle benefits-so much so that Canadian universities are sending out ghosts to students. Coins are used as red envelopes.

However, if you want to further consolidate and expand the Hadcoin and Hades supplies market in Europe, America and the Western world, and turn it from a short-term novelty-hunting cultural phenomenon into a long-term consumption habit, you only need a few Internet celebrity bloggers The voluntary and fee-based publicity is not strong enough.

This is also the reason why Chen Qiuhan came to Los Angeles and entered the University of Southern California Film Academy-although it is difficult for Asian directors and actors to mix well in Hollywood, at least he can learn how to do as the Romans do in the United States and do business for his family. Take advertisements and make announcements to avoid acclimatization.

If you can find a way to establish contacts with the American show business circle, and in some popular movies, TV and games, especially works of the modern urban magic type, embed the content of burning paper money and paper offerings to ancestors, that way The publicity effect is naturally excellent.

——Of course, in a short time, this matter is basically a delusion.

Secondly, if Chen Qiuhan can hook up with the religious groups in the United States, with the help of their influence, maybe they can also open up some sales of ghost coins.

For example, why do those seductive gypsy witches use tarot cards and crystal balls when they do divination in small tents?Isn't it also a traditional divination technique to tell fortunes by looking at the smoke from burning coins?Mibeizhuang can also provide a variety of scented and colored mist customization services!

Unfortunately, Chen Qiuhan, a rich second generation, seriously overestimated his social skills and underestimated the rejection of Asians in American society. "The God of Flying Noodles", he himself is the overall situation!

In short, after realizing what it means to be a "Flying Face God", Chen Qiuhan immediately thought of taking the opportunity to sell his company's "ancestor money" and pulling the entire "Mian Mian Cult" to endorse Mingbi. Selling ghost coins like the Holy See selling indulgences in the Middle Ages...

"...If you can print the heads of God Inari, Yuzao, and Empress Daji on the coins, then I will definitely support it."

Akiyama Megumi commented, "...But, as the chosen one of the Flying Noodle God, it really doesn't matter if you abolish the public and use the public equipment for private use?"

"...It doesn't matter at all! Because..." Chen Qiuhan said confidently, "...the Lord doesn't care (whether it's overcooked)!"