Society fears that young people don’t want to be literary godfathers

(Loneliness and problems given by the gods,)

(Cry when you want to cry...)

(This is fate.)

(Is it time to give up?)

Seasons change, like magic...

The singing ends here.

The girl's singing became more and more passionate, and the violent tapping of the keys also started:

(Love has gone far, love is no longer there.)

(Just for this world, sigh gently...)

(Without sadness, there is no happiness.)

(feeling of happiness.......)

"?!"

When they heard this voice full of power and inexplicable vicissitudes, the audience who stopped were also stunned at this moment.

It seems that I never expected that a girl who is so thin and looks not very old can interpret the vicissitudes of youth and the difficulty of letting go so wonderfully... All those who are attracted by the piano The audience couldn't help but tremble in their hearts!

"Really great!"

Although he knew nothing about music and his major was in comics, when he heard that the past music of his idol Mr. Sloth Fish could be performed so well, in an instant, the little president Dog Eyes applauded enthusiastically, leading to applause. Continuously!

Audiences were already standing in all directions... However, as if she could not feel the crowd around her at all, the girl closed her eyes slightly and entered her own world——

Here, slender fingers struck the electronic piano, and the long melody sounded again:

(Please smile,)

(Life is not eternal,)

(Everyone will be alone.)

(Whispering quietly in my heart:)

("Will it be sunny tomorrow?",)

(Under the distant sky......)

With the last lyric falling.

There was silence in all directions.

After a long time, everyone who was completely brought into the feeling of losing their youth seemed to have come to their senses. Their eyes filled with tears and they cheered for the girl's performance!

A large number of viewers recorded the wonderful street singing and uploaded it on the Internet - in an instant, Xu Yuhuai, who played and sang Sloth Fish's previous works, appeared in the forum in Toyama Prefecture, and more and more passers-by were attracted on the street. , the atmosphere seemed to be extremely lively.

However.......

As the song falls.

It's like remembering something worth remembering.

The brown-haired girl with two pigtails who was always smiling did not show any pride or excitement.

She just sat there, her jade-colored eyes turning slightly, but her eyes couldn't help but turn red.

.....for nothing else.

The girl thought of her slightly sad childhood years in the past, as well as her unforgettable, beautiful regrets...

44. A little jealous 2/2 Please collect it!

Xu Yuhuai, 14 years old, a sophomore at Taoshanyuan Junior High School,

She has a delicate appearance, her dark green eyes are as warm as jade, her short brown hair is tied into two small braids on the left and right, her bulging cheeks show a tender green color, and she is quite charming when she frowns and smiles. The elegant but pure temperament spreads everywhere——

Just looking at the external appearance and reality, Xu Yuhuai, a Chinese-Japanese mixed-race girl, is indeed very outstanding: her father is a doctor, and her mother is a Chinese lawyer who came to Japan to develop. The couple loves each other and dotes on their only daughter, and the girl has been able to go through this. A brief period of happiness.

However... sweet dreams will always be shattered in an instant.

Because he did not get enough rest for a long time, Xu Yuhuai's father, a front-line doctor, exhausted himself a few hours after a major operation and died suddenly at home before the ambulance arrived.

Xu Yuhuai was only five years old when his father left.

In that year, the happy family was shattered, leaving only the haggard mother and young daughter.

After losing her father, the girl's character became quite withdrawn.

She no longer dared to look at the father who came to pick up the child after school, nor did she dare to discuss with others the lunch box her parents made for her today. At this point, the girl became a shadow, hiding under the sun. Dare to touch, unable to look directly, but dare not forget...

Xu Yuhuai's changes were naturally noticed by her classmates.

The true malice of children spreads in the darkness.

Isolation, ridicule, slapping, nails hidden in shoes... Finally, the disease finally caught up with this girl who had lost her father long ago, and completely dragged her into the abyss:

At first it was just ordinary heart palpitations and chest tightness, but later the pain increased exponentially. When she went to the hospital with her mother to see a doctor, the girl was diagnosed with myocarditis and was unable to continue going to school. She could only stay in the hospital bed and look at the window lattice. Cut quartered sky.

For the first time, the threat of death appeared in front of her so clearly... The girl who silently suppressed her inner fear was still afraid after all.

She nodded numbly in response to her mother, who had already burst into tears. The girl felt chills all over her body unconsciously.

After watching his mother wipe away her tears, regain her image as a strong man in the city, carry her business bag and put on a stiff smile as she prepares to receive clients, Xu Yuhuai looked at the empty ward and collapsed weakly on the hospital bed, looking at Under the starry sky at midnight, not a word was said.

for a long time.

As if remembering that her father died on such a white bed, silent fear rose, and the girl's tears fell silently.

There was no hoarseness, no roar... There was only wordless despair in Xu Yuhuai's eyes.

She has always just wanted to spend this life peacefully. She just wanted to be peaceful like others, have friends to talk to, and have a happy family——

But no one expected that fate would play a huge joke on her.

It is precisely because of the unpredictable fate and the girl's inferiority complex arising from the long-term depressive environment that Xu Yuhuai would sometimes sit alone on the hospital bed in a daze, with a vague thought of wanting to die in his heart.

......If you die, it might be a great thing.

One night, as the girl was lying on the hospital bed thinking about something, terrible thoughts arose in her heart.

.....I am not a good boy, and I am not popular with everyone - if I die, it will end the pain and no one else will be sad.

..... If I die early, my mother will be much more relaxed.

.....After all, I am just a burden.

At this point, as if she had found a new motivation in life, the girl began to plan her own death.

I wanted to secretly take away the knife when the nurse aunt was peeling an apple for me, I wanted to walk out of the hospital and run to death, I wanted to strangle myself with a curtain... The few months I spent in bed turned out to be... The happiest moment for a girl in elementary school. Even though she only survived during this period to seek death, the child who has found spiritual sustenance is still a lot more cheerful and can even communicate normally with strangers. It feels like a return to the past.

In the hospital bed, in order to kill some time, the girl also put on the wire-controlled headphones that her father used to wear and listened to music with a scratched MP3——

During this period, Xu Yuhuai's favorite singer was probably the Sloth Teacher who had less than 50 fans.

"Comedy", "hellosong", "Love", "Sakura Forest"... Although there are only a few songs, Teacher Sloth's sunny and gentle song style still touched Xu Yuhuai's heart. , in exchange for a smile on the already pale girl.

The time in the hospital is always long... After learning the day's knowledge by herself through her mother's mobile phone, the girl will always connect her strokes and start writing the lyrics of Teacher Sloth.

(Let’s go home together hand in hand,)

(What are you going to eat today?)

("Such a thing happened",)

(I want to talk to you like this,)

(Whenever I'm with you, it's comedy,)

(dancing on the creaking bed,)

(laughing up and down,)

(The life of laughter and fun, to be continued...)

"Pfft."

While copying the lyrics of Sloth Fish, the girl, who had long since lost her father, couldn't help but laugh.

What is this... It's so funny, why do you have to dance on the bed?Is Teacher Sloth some kind of childish thing?

"However, Mr. Sloth must be a happy person to be able to write such fun lyrics."

"...A little jealous."

While muttering to herself, the smile on the girl's face became a little stiff.

Looking out the window at a world that didn't belong to her, the silent void swallowed up the last warmth.

After a long time.

Looking at the copied lyrics, they are full of happiness.

A cold voice sounded at this moment.

"...If possible, maybe it would be great to use these songs during the funeral."

Xu Yuhuai, who has never forgotten to die, always thinks like this while listening to songs:

"If such a happy song is played at my funeral, maybe my mother won't be sad..."

........

ps: Pure healing without knife, feel free to watch.

45. She doesn’t want to die 1/2 Please collect it!

Xu Yuhuai always felt that he was lucky to hear the work of the unknown musician "Sloth" at the last moment of his life.

Although her desire to die has not changed, although she still feels that there is no hope of continuing to live... However, this girl who has no psychological support and lives alone in the pure white ward like a zombie every day, But it was the first time that I felt like I was living in this world.

"What kind of person is Mr. Sloth..."

Although she always lay motionless on the hospital bed, listening to the sweet music coming from the wire-controlled headphones, the girl always had various imaginations about the young singer with a bright voice who always liked to convey the energy of happiness.

.....If I survive, will I be able to meet him?

Looking at the young singer with only more than 50 fans on the homepage, the girl couldn't help but smile bitterly.

(....Forget it, an unknown singer with only a few dozen fans will definitely not have any fate with me.)

(...To be able to sing songs like this every day, Teacher Sloth must be a very cheerful person in reality.)

(....Completely different from me.)

Although he always smiles and is always considered a strong child by others... Xu Yuhuai, who understands that he will never be able to meet the sloth teacher, can't help but feel a special regret in his heart.

Of course...none of that matters.

(..... He's almost dead anyway, so these things don't matter.)

With some strong thoughts.

When he finally found an opportunity, Xu Yuhuai tiptoed out of the ward and escaped under the cover of night——

The girl who had been smiling all the time finally started to implement the self-destruction plan that she had been preparing for months.

Follow the steps and arrive at the rooftop of the hospital step by step.

wow.

The breeze melted into the darkness.

To be honest, the moment he opened the rooftop, Xu Yuhuai really felt like he was in another world.

She couldn't remember how long it had been since she had seen such a clear sky again - the diffuse and lonely moonlight extended to the horizon in the direction of the wind, a sight she could not see through the dusty window lattice.

Standing on the rooftop, looking at the pure white bedspread that had been dried, the girl always felt as if she was in the gap between heaven and hell.

Everything is so familiar, yet so strange to the girl...

"call......"

It is also this time.

Xu Yuhuai's expression was a little subtle.