Hikigaya doesn't want to be a force of strength

Therefore, even when facing Kushida who launched a gentle offensive, he said almost cold-bloodedly: "I don't know why you hate Horikita so much, but is it really okay to destroy the entire D class for Horikita?"

"W-what? What are you talking about?"

"... To you, are the people in Class D just a bunch of people who don't care about anything? Just because of Horikita Suzune, are you going to let everyone be buried with her?"

Hikigaya's words made it impossible for Kushida Kikyo to pretend anymore.

The brown-haired girl's eyes gradually became dim, even cold, and she raised her head little by little, no longer showing any shyness or gentleness.

"Hikigaya, how much do you know?"

Hikigaya had already anticipated what Kushida would say, and he knew what he would hear next and what he should say in response.

"Basically, everything is clear now. You and Ryuen Sho were working together in private, and you became a traitor."

"Why? I didn't reveal any flaws in this matter."

Kushida did not suspect that it was Ryuen Sho who leaked the secret, because the fact that Kushida became a traitor would be of great benefit to Class C.

If Ryuen Sho was a normal person, he would never tell such a crucial secret to anyone.

Unfortunately, Kushida did not understand that the king of Class C, Ryuen Sho, was not a normal person. He was a suspicious, almost terrifying guy who would not believe any information from unknown sources.

"You don't need to know how I know this." Hikigaya didn't explain too much, "I just want to tell you that even if you defeat Horikita in this way, you won't get what you want."

"Maybe... But what I want to do most right now is to completely defeat Horikita Suzune!"

Judging from the tone of Kushida Kikyo's voice, her hatred and hostility towards Horikita can be said to have reached an unimaginable peak.

In order to achieve this goal, she would probably use every possible means.

Although Hikigaya was very curious about why Kushida was so hostile to Horikita, there was no need to ask questions at this time.

He just spoke silently: "Yes, you and Ryuen can indeed defeat Horikita Suzune by working together, and then what? Class D is completely suppressed by Class C and cannot turn over. You and your classmates will become Ryuen Sho's pawns and puppets for the next three years. Is this a beautiful future?"

"This……"

Hikigaya's cold and sharp questioning completely hit Kushida Kikyo's soft spot.

During this period of time, the girl must have been asking herself again and again in her heart whether this was the right thing to do.

And when she asked herself this question in her heart, the answer was actually already obvious.

However, Kushida still seemed unwilling to admit the reality, and gritted his teeth and said: "But, as the saying goes, you need to pay a price to do anything, and there is no lunch that falls from the sky in this world. I just want to defeat Horikita, and I have to make some sacrifices for this. Is there any problem with that?"

"It's fine to make sacrifices to achieve your goals." Hikigaya nodded silently. "The only problem is that what's lost can never be recovered. Even if you try your best to pretend that nothing happened and maintain a normal relationship, maybe everything can still be the same on the surface, but the changes that have taken place in all the people involved in this matter can never be treated as if they never happened."

In this world, there are always things that make people regret.

There are also some words that one wishes had never been said.

For example, two people who could communicate normally until yesterday suddenly became distant from each other after one night and never spoke to each other again; or two people who used to exchange letters frequently suddenly stopped sending messages one day.

As people continue to grow, they are bound to lose and abandon some things.

But when making sacrifices and abandoning the past, people must be prepared to lose it all in advance.

If you don't have the awareness and the will to take responsibility for everything in advance, in the end, all you will face is endless regret.

This is what happened to Kushida.

She seemed to be willing to do anything to defeat Horikita, but deep down she was not ready to make sacrifices, let alone bear the consequences.

If she cooperates with Ryuuen like this and sells out Class D to achieve her own goals, then she will only have endless regrets.

By that time, the collapse of Kushida Kikyo as an individual would be an inevitable fact...

Chapter 385: Kushida, you are a gentler person than you think, right?

Hikigaya's series of heartfelt advice clearly shook Kushida Kikyo's heart.

The brown-haired girl was silent for a long time, then she closed her eyes and said, "You may be right. I may not be ready to make the sacrifice yet."

"Of course, it would be strange if you could prepare yourself mentally to that level in advance."

Hikigaya picked up the coffee and took a sip, then deliberately raised his head to look at the glass beside him. In the reflection above, Kushida was staring at the table, as if deliberately not looking at his face.

"But, should I give up?" Kushida gritted his teeth, "No matter what, I don't want to let Horikita Suzune go. I will force that woman to drop out of school! Otherwise, I will never give up!"

It seems that Kushida Kikyo's resentment and hatred towards Horikita Suzune is not just on the surface. She really wants to fight to the death with Horikita Suzune.

In response, Hikigaya did not deny Kushida's idea, but followed his idea and said, "Is that so? Then you only have two choices now. One is to continue making mistakes like this, and prepare yourself to be hated by the entire D class and fall into a state of long-term guilt. The other is to give up that paranoid idea and use a more correct approach that you will not regret to confront Horikita Suzune."

"Are these the only two options?"

"Of course, people can't make a third choice. There are only two paths: regret or not regret. It depends on which one you want to choose."

"..."

Facing Hikigaya's questioning, Kushida Kikyo clenched her fists.

It was obvious that she was experiencing a severe shaken heart. The overly difficult choice had subjected her body and mind to severe torture, and she was exhausted.

"I have wavered many times, wondering if this is too bad." Kushida Kikyo said in a complicated tone, "If we cooperate with Class C, Class D will definitely be damaged, and everyone in Class D will become unhappy... However, I still can't control my anger towards Horikita Suzune. If it's to make her drop out of school, I think it doesn't matter if I do anything!"

Pah—a foam appeared on the coffee in front of Kushida, just like the girl's inner thoughts that were silently revealed at this moment.

"After all, I think that in order to gain something, losing something is inevitable."

Kushida stared at the surface of the coffee, as if trying to find out what was submerged beneath the surface. However, no matter how long she looked, she could not see through the thick surface and see the real thing underneath.

In the end, she herself knew what she had to lose by doing this.

Because she knows very well that everything she has now is nothing but false - whether it is friendship or interpersonal relationships, they are all false and fake.

Therefore, she needs to make a choice that she will not regret while being willing to make sacrifices.

However, will she really not regret it?

"In the final analysis, all of this is because you are so selfish, Kushida."

"Of course I am a selfish person—"

Kushida's tone became impatient, and she glared at him with full anger.

Hikigaya did not avoid the other's gaze and stared back at him firmly.

This attitude made Kushida feel at a loss as to what to do. The girl felt ashamed of her sudden temper, but she forced herself to maintain a tough attitude.

"You're right, I'm a selfish and bad person. The gentle and kind-hearted Kushida Kikyo is just a disguise I created to deceive everyone! I won't waver in the slightest for the lives of those guys. As long as I can achieve my own goals, even if it means sacrificing the interests of Class D, I will absolutely..."

"You're lying." Facing Kushida Kikyo's long speech, which seemed to be trying to convince herself and herself, Hikigaya concluded in a calm tone, "If what you said is true, and you are really as extremely selfish as you say, and you can unscrupulously use other people for your own benefit, then why are you so shaken here?"

"I……"

Hikigaya's words left Kushida unable to make any rebuttal.

She was indeed in such a distressed state during this period because she was wavering in her heart and could not easily make up her mind to betray the class as she had expected.

As long as Horikita can be defeated, no matter what the cost.

Kushida originally believed this, but reality made her realize that she was not as cold and cruel as she imagined, at least she could not easily make up her mind to betray the class.

"Kushida, you are very selfish, but not selfish enough. You want Horikita Suzune to drop out of school, but you are reluctant to let Class D suffer such a big loss. This is your biggest problem now, right?"

"...Well, that's right."

Kushida finally managed to squeeze out these few words. She obviously didn't want to easily conclude that she wasn't a vicious woman with a cruel heart who would do anything to achieve her goals.

But the reality made her realize that she was not as cold and selfish as she thought...

At the same time, Hikigaya can understand why Kushida is in distress, and can also understand his desire to put everything aside but be bound by his own feelings.

Yes, he could understand.

Sometimes, people are always unable to face their own hearts frankly, and always go around in circles when faced with problems, but can never find the correct answer.

Because human hearts are fragile, not only can they not face crises easily, but even when facing themselves, they have to find many reasons to cover up so as not to be broken by collapse.

The protagonists in the novels are always very frank, will not waver in the face of any crisis, and will make the most correct and firm choices.

But ordinary people in reality often cannot do all of this, and can only hesitate endlessly and still cannot see the way forward.

After all, there is no substitute for the things that are truly important; once you lose something irreplaceable, there is no way to get it back.

No one can easily make a choice in the face of such a heavy reality.

The same is true for Hikigaya, so he will not blame Kushida, nor will he look down on her or laugh at her.

Whether he doesn't take a step forward or continues to stay in a comfortable environment, Hikigaya himself is actually a person who will instinctively retreat when faced with difficulties.

Even if it were him, he probably wouldn't be able to do better than Kushida.

Because of this, he did not deny Kushida, but silently said: "There is no best of both worlds in this world. You are free to choose whichever side you want, but I still say that I hope you can make a choice that you will not regret."

"This……"

After hearing what Hikigaya said, Kushida was stunned at first, then he gave up and sighed silently.

She hesitated for a long time before looking up dejectedly.

That smile didn't sit well with Hikigaya.

Because that is not a smile that comes with an answer, but a bitter smile that escapes reality, a hypocritical answer.

"I still can't regret it."

"Kushida, are you looking down on me? I won't believe what others say so easily."

I have a bad personality and I always want to interpret the hidden meaning of others' words.

Therefore, whether it is true or false, you can almost make a judgment the moment you speak.

"There's no other way. I don't have any choice anymore."

"No choice?"

"After all, I have already told Ryuuen that I am a favored student. The fact that I betrayed Class D cannot be changed..."

Kushida's face was filled with helplessness.

She was like a drowning person who had finally grabbed a life-saving straw, only to find that her legs had been bitten by sharks at the bottom of the sea and she could no longer struggle.

However, Hikigaya did not show any dissatisfaction when hearing her words. Instead, he nodded in approval and said calmly, "You finally admitted your true thoughts."

"What do you really think?"

"You don't actually have the idea of ​​sacrificing Class D in order to defeat Horikita, right? Up to now, you haven't fallen to that level, and you still retain the most basic integrity, instead of being assimilated by this school to selfishness, and using any means to achieve your own goals!"

"No way!" Kushida became a little flustered when he heard what Hikigaya said, "I am that kind of person. I will not be bound by boring things! As long as I can defeat Horikita, as long as I can defeat Horikita Suzune, I am willing to pay anything! And I have already betrayed, things are irreversible!"

"Really? What if I tell you that you still have a chance to regret it, and there is a way for you to get out of the quagmire of becoming a class traitor?"

"Wha...what?!"

Hikigaya's words made the originally angry Kushida feel like being poured with a bucket of cold water.

The girl stared at Hikigaya in front of her in amazement, as if she had never expected him to say such a thing. "Are you telling the truth? Do I still have a chance to regret it?!"

"Yes, I came here specially to give you this opportunity and talked with you for so long." Hikigaya stated the purpose of his visit without hesitation, and looked at Kushida calmly, "Now, it's time for you to make a choice."

"Kikyou Kushida, do you want to achieve your goal by any means necessary, even becoming a traitor to Class D, or do you choose to cooperate with me and make a completely new choice? At least you don't have to bear the name of a traitor."

"Come on, make your choice."

Humans are selfish most of the time, but selfish people often desire the good things they do not have.

How great would it be if you had a chance to change?

Everyone has had this thought in their mind.

And if this idea really appears in reality, how many people are willing to miss the opportunity to change themselves and become better?

"me……"

Kushida Kikyo felt an unprecedented wavering in her heart; confusion and chaos kept appearing on her face, and even crystal liquid leaked out and condensed in the corners of her eyes.

The girl's struggle is like a sinner's elegy.

Until the answer is finally revealed——

"...I am willing to cooperate with you."