Van Gogh Reborn!

Hun looked strange when I went into my study. 

Even if I hold onto him and ask him what's going on, he doesn't say anything. 

"Hun, what's wrong? Huh?" 

I hugged him, but he tried to push me away with his little hands. 

He was very anxious and I don't know what happened, but it felt heartbreaking because Hun was shaking in my arms. 

I patted his back and looked around. 

The room, which was messy because there were many things to think about, is quite organized. 

“That.” 

Hae's diary was on the floor. 

I think he found it while he was organizing the room. 

Hun looked at his mom's diary because I neglected to clean the house. 

Did it remind him of the shock at the time of the accident? 

Did the memory come back a little? 

Is that why he's having such a hard time? 

The guy who was trying to push me away until a while ago hugged me tightly. 

"It's okay. It's okay." 

First of all, I have to reassure him. 

"…… I'm sorry, grandpa" 

Hun kept repeating the word sorry. 

I wish he could cry out all the sorrow stacked in his heart. 

If I can, I will be happy to drown in those tears. 

"What are you sorry about? There's nothing for you to be sorry about." 

I held Hun, who started to wail.

We stayed like that for a while 

How long has it been? 

I made Hun sit on my lap and hugged him from behind. 

He is now embarrassed that he cried so much.

“Let go of me now, grandpa.” 

“No,” 

“I won't cry. I won’t run away.” 

“No.” 

He sits still and tries to turn around. 

When I loosen my hands, he looks at me and then bows his head.

After a while, he once again raised his head. 

His eyes were trembling with anxiety and fear. 

I don't know what's wrong with the child who usually does everything so smart. 

"Hun," 

I said, holding his hand. 

"You don't have to say it if you don't want to," 

Hun shakes his head. 

"If you have something to say, you don't have to worry. Grandpa will always be on your side." 

He bows his head. 

Covering his face, he suddenly rushed in. 

He tightly hugged me with his shaking body, as if he was going somewhere soon. 

I felt confused with his behavior of some kind of farewell. 

"I love you, grandpa" 

Hun's voice that had reached my ear faded away.

He sat apart and spoke with a still anxious expression on his face.

"I'm not……Ko Hun." 

I don't know what he’s talking about. 

"Hun?" 

Tears kept dropping down from his eyes. 

"I'm not who you think I am, Grandpa." 

Hun, who started saying something mysterious, swallows his saliva as if his throat was hoarse. 

"I…I’m…. not your grandson." 

I couldn't think of anything for a moment. 

I just watched the little guy with eyes full of tears. 

"What are you talking about? How can you say that!" 

I tried not to get angry in front of Hun as much as possible, but I don't care about such a resolution. 

"Who said that? Huh? What kind of guy says that? Did any reporter say that?" 

He just bowed and shook his heads. 

My heart feels tight. 

“Tell me, what happened? I feel like I’ll die looking at you like this!!"

I'm afraid I'll die looking at the little guy crying like that. 

I spat out what I shouldn't have said in front of Hun, who is afraid of being left alone in the world. 

I know it in my head, but what Hun said was so shocking that my brain doesn’t seem to have control of my words. 

"…You know," 

Hun opened his mouth with his fist tightly clenched. 

I can't understand what he’s trying to say. 

“What do I know? Huh?” 

“I don't like SpongeBob, I like potato pizza, I'm good at drawing.” 

“….huh?” 

Did he eat something wrong? 

I couldn't understand what he was talking about, but suddenly I remembered Hae's diary, and I think he saw the diary entry that said he likes SpongeBob and doesn't eat potato pizza. 

I'm sure he must have seen drawings from his childhood. 

I think he is doing this because he feels he’s so different from himself before the accident. 

“ Little Hun,” 

Wiping away his tears, I comforted him. 

"Do you remember when we came back from the trip to Europe?" 

NOD

"Didn’t I say whether you have the memory or not it doesn’t change the fact you’re my grandson?" 

"That's not it." 

"Hun." 

I don't know what this child is worried about. 

I don't even know why such a thought came to him. 

But it's something that I need to listen to gradually. 

The first thing to do is to ease Hun, who trembles with anxiety and fear. 

"How can you be the same when you don't remember? What you like and dislike can change as much as you grow. Grandpa also used to like greasy food when I was young." 

Hun shakes his head vigorously. 

"Such things don’t change the fact that you’re my grandson and I’m your grandfather" 

He tried to talk, but swallowed the words again and again. 

I think he had something to say, so I waited, and he barely opened my mouth. 

“I'm not Hun.” 

“Who are you then?” 

⏩ ⏩ ⏩ ⏩ ⏩ ⏩

I'm prepared. 

Grandpa hugged me tightly without letting me go, and his arms were so warm that I couldn't fool him anymore. 

So I made up my mind, but when he asked who I am, I couldn't say anything. 

It's not easy to abandon the greatest happiness in my life, even if I got it by chance. 

I can't lie to grandpa. 

"…Vincent…… I’m Vincent van Gogh." 

I couldn't bear to see grandpa, so I lowered my head. 

He can't believe it. 

Even… I can't understand this miraculous situation, I think he might think I'm crazy. 

After being so silent for a while, grandpa covered his cheek. 

I've been imagining for the past few days how grandpa would come out when I said who I am. 

I don't think he'll take me to a mental hospital like in my previous life. 

They'll hit me and laugh. 

I'm sure they'll treat me like crap. 

I thought he might get angry, but grandpa looked as usual. 

"Hun." 

"…." 

"Grandpa doesn't understand what you're talking about." 

Of course. 

Who would have imagined that a man who died a hundred years ago was in the body of a dead grandson? 

Grandpa could have lived happily with his beloved grandson if I hadn't come into this body. 

I should have kept it a secret. 

I’m just hurting grandpa because of my desire to not live with the guilt. 

"But I'm trying to understand what Hun is saying." 

"Yes." 

Grandfather exhaled long. 

"Grandpa knows that Hun is different from before he lost his memory. You’re different from you in your mom's diary." 

At a glance, it sounded like he was thinking of me and Ko Hun separately. 

But from grandpa’s point of view, he can't think of Ko Hun and me separately. 

He thinks I’m different because I've lost my memory

"It doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter even if it's someone else, as you said." 

I raised my head to grandpa's words. 

"Wasn't it you who woke up in the hospital, ate with grandpa, slept, drew, traveled, and read books together?" 

That's me. 

It's definitely me. 

When I nodded, grandpa once again took a deep breath. 

He is trying to understand this ridiculous situation. 

"You lived with this grandpa, right?" 

That's true, but I don't know where to start explaining. 

"You've to talk. We can’t find a solution if you don't say anything." 

Grandpa is right. 

I forgot for a while because I was afraid of losing grandpa, but there is no way to understand each other without communicating. 

I gave advice to Sihyeon like a bigshot, but in reality, I'm actually worse than him. 

But there's no way to prove I'm Vincent. 

Can he believe it even if I tell the story rationally? 

Something that even I couldn't accept? 

A normal person was possessed by a ghost. 

"I lived with grandpa ever since I woke up in the hospital. I was so happy. If I could live like now, I would do anything. But, I'm not grandpa's grandson." 

That's all I can explain to him in a common-sense line. 

“I'll get angry if you keep repeating that nonsense!” 

I was startled by grandpa's anger.

Grandpa shook his arm before I could speak. 

"Hun, who am I?" 

Grandpa's face is so desperate and he's so sad that he can't keep his mouth shut.

“Who am I to you?” 

“…Grandpa.” 

“Yes! I’m your grandpa. We’re a family. What’s real or fake about a family? Yeah, let's say you're not Hun. Does that change the time you and I spent together?" 

“No.” 

"It’s not the blood that makes people a family, it’s the time spent together that makes a family. I really don't know why Hun thinks like this." 

Grandpa is breathing heavily and I'm worried that he might faint. 

"Didn’t I tell you not to cling to the past you can’t remember? Let’s build fun and happy things. That’s what family is. I couldn’t build it with my daughter, that's why we drifted apart." 

“ I didn't know about the Ko Hun before, but I do know the Ko Hun who spends every day with me – what he likes and what he doesn't. That’s my grandson. I like that grandson who sometimes does crazy things. I like that grandson who worries when I’m not eating. I'm so proud of that grandson and I LOVE THAT GRANDSON…I love you more today and I will love you even more tomorrow." 

“Grandpa.” 

“Yes!” 

He's really trying to understand me. 

He does not ignore or deny my words or my ridiculous stories. 

He speaks on the assumption that we’re not related by blood. 

"I'm your Grandfather. So now tell me, who are you?" 

"I……."

“I’m……….”

“Grandpas’s GRANDSON.”

(To be Continued)

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