When A Ghoul Falls In Love

The pregnancy stick in my hand weighs more than its actual weight.

"Nell." Maisie slams the bathroom stall door. "How long are you going to take?"

I stare at two red lines. I wish that they would disappear. Then, it would be alright. Nothing would change. 

"C'mon!" Maisie yells. "Come out! Whatever it is, we are with you."

But my mother would hate me.

I can't recall any moment where we haven't been cautious, but I also can't be sure that I have always been cautious in bed. There might have been days when I thought that it was safe to have s.e.x without a c.o.n.d.o.m. I have been keeping track of my period days and everything else. This shouldn't be happening.

"Nell, don't be stressed." Maisie's voice is barely a whisper. "It's not good for you in this state."

She must have guessed it. 

I unlock the latch and walk out of the stall. I don't look at her. She trails behind me as I step toward the trash bin and toss the proof of my pregnancy inside. "Don't tell Joon Woo."

"Are you going to keep it a secret?" Maisie asks me while I wash my hands. "You have to tell him."

"I know." 

But I need some time. My mother would hate me for getting pregnant like this. If I say that I don't hate getting pregnant, would she accept my decision? I am already eighteen. I am barely an a.d.u.l.t. I don't know how to take care of a child. 

There's a first time for everything. 

What would Joon Woo say about this? If I keep the child, it will change our lives. 

I look at my reflection in the mirror. Strange things have been happening to me. I have seen extraordinary creatures. Sometimes, my palms would emit strange lights. I get weird dreams each night. 

Baek Joon Woo promised me that we would figure it out together. 

"Nell, let's go to the club room." Maisie takes my hand. "Look, Baek Joon Woo must be in French class. The twins will take the notes for Economics. We can skip the classes today. You need some rest."

The club room is our usual meeting place. Sometimes, we stay there after school. There are eight members in the book club: Joon Woo, Nick, Millie, Oliver, Maisie, Samantha, Abigail, and me. 

Baek Joon Woo joined this club in the first year. After the seniors graduated, he was the only member. Then, Nick and Millie joined it. After he and I started going out, Maisie and the twins joined. Oliver joined it earlier this year because he wanted to get close to Maisie.

I need some rest before I face my mother. It's impossible to avoid this. I don't want to get an abortion. 

But why am I the way I am? My mother can't see the things that I can see. My abilities didn't come from her and I am not crazy. Baek Joon Woo has seen the butterflies rising from my palms, although he can't see some things either. He doesn't think that I am crazy.

According to him, we live in a world where such things are possible. All the fairytales are true in one or other ways.

Maisie and I return to the club room. Oliver is reading a book by the window. Maisie makes a face at him.

"Why are you always skipping classes?" She scolds him.

He doesn't look up from the book. "You are also skipping classes."

The boy used to be meek. Now, he talks back. It must be Maisie's influence. Nobody stays young and naive forever. 

"I am your senior, " She huffs at him. "Get out. Nell and I want to be alone."

Oliver glances at me. "Nell, should I leave?"

"You can stay." I sit down on the couch. Leaning back, I close my eyes. "Stay quiet."

"I will." 

My ears pick up his soft whisper. Ever since the day butterflies of moonlight made their appearance in my life, my senses have been sharpening. I am not too happy about it.

Nevertheless, they remain quiet. After a while, I hear them get up and leave. I let out a sigh. Maisie understands that I want to be alone. But I also understand that she wants to f.u.c.k Oliver. They are probably going to the roof, the janitor room, or the lab. That's the usual places where students go when they want to get it out of their systems. 

Baek Joon Woo isn't like that. He hates doing it in public places. That's why we either go to a cheap motel or his room. Sometimes, he comes to my room through the window. It's not like we are always doing it. On most nights, he holds me tightly and sleeps.

"I should have been careful, " I mutter. 

There's nothing to be proud about getting pregnant in my teens. Joon Woo and I have a lot to do. He and I must attend college. He wants to be a writer and he has a talent. I won't hinder his dreams. 

***

"Baek Joon Woo, someone is looking for Nell!" Samantha shouts. "Wake her up."

"Sam, don't be loud. She's sleeping, " Baek Joon Woo chastises her. "Keep it low. Who is looking for her?"

My head is on his l.a.p. I have no idea when I fell asleep. His warm hand is on my head. I don't want to open my eyes. As long as it's possible, I want to stay like this.

"It's Killian Forst, " Abigail answers. As Samantha's elder twin, she is always calm. After a pause, she adds, "The exchange student who started today? Nell is selected as his school guide because nobody agreed to do it and she was absent during the class."

Baek Joon Woo and I are not attending three classes together. He's taking all the classes related to literature and also, he is taking French and German. I am taking accounts and economics. The boy must be in economics class because Abigail and Samantha also attend it. 

"Let him look for her," Baek Joon Woo tells her in an indifferent tone. "While he is looking for her, he will explore the school and find his own ways."

The corner of my lips curls up. He's jealous, isn't he? He doesn't like me hanging out with other guys, but he will never say that he dislikes it. 

"You are mean, Baek Joon Woo." Samantha clicks her tongue. "The boy looks strange, especially his eyes. He has huge dark circles around his eyes as if he hasn't slept for a hundred years and his skin is so pale. Also, he is nearly a skeleton."

"Basically, you don't have to be jealous of him if Nell gives him a school tour, " Abigail chimes in. "Nell will never like a guy like him."

"You never know, " He mumbles softly. "People will fall for her easily once they get to know her. I don't want more competition."

I resist an urge to laugh. What competition is there? There is no way that I will ever love someone else. He's truly the only one for me.

"Geez! Nell and you are the same!" Samantha exclaims. "By the way, where is Maisie? I didn't see her during the class either."

"She must be with Oliver if she's not with Nell," Abigail answers her scornfully.

"She always says that she doesn't like Oliver but she is always with him." 

"She likes him, " Baek Joon Woo utters, "If you don't believe me, why don't you try getting closer to Oliver?"

"I don't want to get beaten up," Samantha replies. "Nell and Maisie like to break bones. Remember how Nell best up Evie."

I hear him sigh. "I told her that there is nothing between me and Evie."

"I guess she doesn't like competition either." Abigail chuckles. "It's time for my next class. I am going."

"I will go too, " Samantha exhales. "I will leave you two alone."

"See you both later." 

After they are gone, Baek Joon Woo strokes my hair. "How long are you going to pretend to be asleep?"

I am caught. 

"When did you know?" I look into his dark eyes. "You kept talking like that while knowing that I was awake."

"You aren't good at pretending." He smiles smugly. "And I know how much you want me to say that I am jealous."

"Are you not?" I ask him in a challenging tone.

"Am I?" He murmurs vaguely. "Am I not?"

His eyes shine with amus.e.m.e.nt when I pout at him. He loves teasing me. 

"Fine." I roll my eyes. "I wonder how a sophisticated guy like you fell in love with me."

"You want to hear why you are amazing from my mouth." Baek Joon Woo pinches my nose. "You are such a narcissistic person."

"Hmph! It's too late to regret it."

"I will never regret loving you."

"Yeah, I won't regret it either."