Why Did I Become the Villainess?

Prince Fraser looks at the Aster flower and glares at it. "Aster, huh? He dares to give you an aster flower in front of me?"

He walks towards the flower and kicks it. The pot breaks, and the flower falls on the ground. I immediately walk towards the flower.

"Fraser! Why did you do that?" I kneel on the ground, and I am about to take the flower when Prince Fraser grabs my hand. 

"Why are you picking that? That flower was given by that Prince. Why are you picking it?" Prince Fraser snaps at me. 

I try to break off from his grasp, but he wouldn't let me. I sigh and stare at him. "What is it again, Prince Fraser? That's just a flower. Do you need to break it?"

Prince Fraser scoffs. "That is just a flower? Csille it's a tradition from their Kingdom. He definitely gave you that flower because he likes you. Who knows, maybe he even wants to snatch you away from me, and that's now what I like. I would never let anyone take you away from me."

I sigh. "Fraser, haven't I had a talk with you. Would you please stop all of this? Prince Joachim already explains his side. That tradition isn't applicable to someone who is engaged, and I am engaged with you. So, why are you making a big deal out of it? That's just a welcome gift."

Prince Fraser scoffs. "And you just believe him? Csille, how long have you know that man? Don't be fool by his disability! He definitely has a liking to you, and that reason he is saying? Are you sure it's true?"

I sigh. "Okay, Prince Fraser. Then can you prove to me that everything he said is not true?"

Prince Fraser puts his hands over my shoulders. "Csille, why do I need to prove it? I am your fiancée. Why can't you believe me?"

"Prince Fraser, I couldn't just believe your words just because you are my fiancée. I know you are the Crown Prince of the Vrawyth Kingdom, and I respect that. But I couldn't just believe what you just said. He is also a Prince of the Yesian Kingdom and what you did to him is rude. Although we're superior to them but it's not enough reason for you to be rude to him. He is a true Yesian, and he knows their culture than us. So, you questioning him, don't you think it's out of line? What will happen if Prince Joachim uses it to break the friendly relationship of the Yesian Kingdom with the Vrawyth Kingdom?"

"Are you mad at me, Csille?"

"I'm not! I'm just frustrated with you. I don't understand why did you do that to Prince Joachim. Fraser, do you want to break our friendly relationship with the Yesian Kingdom?"

Prince Fraser shakes his head. "You're mad at me. Is it because of what happened this morning? Csille, I can explain. Will you please let me explain?"

I sigh. How can he explain it to me? That he couldn't control his body again just the way, I couldn't control mine? This, I really need to stop seeing Prince Fraser. This won't help the plot of the story.

"You don't need to explain anything, Fraser. Can I now get inside? I want to rest already."

I avoid his gaze because I know if I look at him, my heart would soften again, and that is not what I want. I cannot let my heart decide for me again. As much as possible, I want to stay away from Prince Fraser, especially now that I haven't talked to the Virtouse.

I break off from his grasp, and he lets me. I sigh and smile bitterly at him. "You should rest, your highness. It's already late."

I walk past him. Sorry, Prince Fraser. I know what happened to you is beyond your control, but I cannot let you continue this interaction with Csille. You already have Princess Paislee by your side. Just focus your attention on her. You'll definitely thank me in the future.

However, my step was halted when I felt someone hugging me from behind. I feel my heart beats fast. "Csille, please let me explain. Don't push me away. I don't want you to push me away." Prince Fraser whispered behind me.

I feel my heart tremble a little because of his words, and I almost want to say yes to him. I almost want to hear his explanation. But I shake my head. I tried to break off from his hug, but every time I will, he would just hug me tighter. "Csille, why are you doing this to me? It hurts. All I want is to be beside you. What happened this morning... I-I real-"

I shake my head at him. I could feel a sob is almost getting out of my throat, but I swallow it. "You don't need to explain, Prince Fraser. I know. You couldn't control yourself again? Is that it?" I scoff. I bite my lips to stop myself from crying.

You cannot cry, Ysa! Get a hold of yourself! You cannot cry! For goodness sake, Prince Fraser isn't meant for Csille. It's better to cut this off as earlier as possible so it won't hurt you that much in the future.

"Believe me. What I said is true. I don't know what happened and how it happened, but the moment I step my foot on the ground of the Saiven Kingdom, I lost it. I couldn't control what I am doing or what I am saying. It's like someone possessed me. Please, believe what I'm saying. It's really true. I am not lying to you, Csille. Please, believe me."

I smile bitterly. I believe you, Fraser, but I cannot tell you that. I need you to stay away from Csille. You are not meant for Csille. So, please shift your feelings to its rightful owner, Princess Paislee.

I scoff. "So, are you telling me you been possessed?" I chuckled. "Even though what you said in the morning might be false but what I have felt is real, Fraser. You've hurt me. Whether it's you or the reason you are saying, you cannot change the fact that you have hurt me, and the pain cannot be healed just by a simple sorry Fraser."

I feel Prince Fraser trembles, and he hugs me even tighter. "I'm sorry. Please, forgive me. I don't mean to shout at you or to say those mean words to you. Trust me, Csille. The last thing I would do is to hurt you. So pl-"

I chuckled. "But you already hurt me, Fraser, and you cannot change that fact. So, please let me go."

I feel Prince Fraser shakes his head. "I don't want to let you go. Not until you listen to me."

I scoff at him. "Fraser, you want me to listen to you, and I listen already, but why can't you accept my decision? Do you want to force me to believe your words?" I laugh at him. "You know why I want to stay away from you? It's because of this, Fraser. It's because you want me to be someone who you want me to be and not the someone I want to be. You cannot force relationship, Fraser. You cannot force love."

Prince Fraser froze because of what I just said. I smile bitterly. I feel tears started to fall down my face.

 I'm sorry for hurting you, Fraser. I'm sorry for always hurting you. I don't want to hurt you believe me. But I have no other choice. In the first place, everything that is happening is not supposed to happen. It's my fault. It's my fault for putting you in this situation, and I'm sorry. Sorry also for cutting all of this. 

"Fraser, let me go. I need you to let me go for me to grow and for you to grow too. If we keep forcing things, it will only lead to something worst. So, I'm begging you to let me go. Let us go."

I heard Prince Fraser sobs. "I don't want to let you go, Csille. Didn't you tell me nothing will change between us? But what is happening, Csille? Why do you want me to let go? Is that too easy for you to let me go? To let us go?"

I bite my lips hards to the point that they already bleed, but I don't care. The pain on my lips cannot even be compared to the pain I am feeling right now. It hurts. It really hurts so bad that I want to hug him back to ease the pain. 

But I know I cannot do that. I already made my decision. Even if it hurts, I need to do what I should do. 

 I cannot risk everyone, Fraser, so I'm sorry if I'm sacrificing you. I'm sorry if I choose to hurt you. If I can only shoulder all the pain, I would take it all from you. But I cannot do that. I just wish that you'll be happy with Princess Paislee more than the happiness when you are with me. Please, be happy.

"Fraser, it's not. I'm breaking off our engagement. It's still valid. Until the King is still alive and he still wants me to be your bride, it will be valid. What I am asking you right now is my freedom. You cannot force things on me, Fraser. Not because you want me to listen to you, it doesn't mean I would listen to you. It doesn't work that way, Fraser."

I feel Prince Fraser nods his head. "You want that? I can compromise Csille. If you don't want that, then I won't force it on you. Just don't do this. And you said our engagement is valid until my father is still alive? But what will happen if he died? Csille, what will happen to us after?"

I shake my head at him. Why can't he understand what I am saying? This relationship isn't meant to last. So, why would we waste both of our time on a relationship that will end up in vain? Prince Fraser is only meant for Princess Paislee and not for Csille. It's something that even I, the writer of the story, cannot change. It's a dead end for the two of us. 

"Compromise? Can you really do that, Fraser? 

Can't you see? No matter what we do, there is always a reason for us to fight. Every day we always fight for futile reasons that we didn't even expect. That's not who we are, Fraser. We're becoming something we are not, Fraser. Can't you see what we are becoming of just because we are forcing this relationship to work?"

I sigh and force myself to break off from his hug, and I did. I face him and smile bitterly at him. "Fraser, you are a decisive person. You're not impulsive, but what you did today to Prince Joachim? That's impulsiveness, and that is not you. We're becoming toxic for each other. You always get mad because of an unknown reason I cannot even tell-"

"I'm mad because you're always with the other guys, but you won't even let me be with you," he cuts me off.

I sigh and envelope his cheeks with my hand. "Fraser, trust me, I want to make this thing work the same way you do." I paused. I'm sorry for lying to you, Fraser, but I cannot tell you the real reason why I am pushing you away. "But how can we make it work if every time we will force this relationship, we always end up hurting each other. Don't you think it's time for us to let each other go?"

Prince Fraser shakes his head. "How can I let you go, Csille? How can I be assured that it was still us in the end? if I know that the moment I let you go, you will stay away from me."

"But you're suffocating me, Fraser, and I don't like it. I don't like what is happening, Fraser. It keeps repeating every day. We will be okay, then the next moment, you will be yelling at me. Fraser, if it's not me, it's you who push me away, and I'm tired of this. I'm tired of hoping that maybe we can still make it work. That maybe we just need a little time for ourselves. Don't you think it's too early for this? Maybe it's still not the right time for us. Maybe we just need time for ourselves. We're losing it, Fraser. We're losing ourselves just to save this relationship."

Prince Fraser sigh and hugs me tightly. "I hate to admit this, but you are right. Even I, myself, couldn't understand what is happening to me. Maybe you're right. Maybe we just need to focus on ourselves first. But Csille, I just want you to know that no matter what happens, it will always be you and only you."

I smile bitterly at his words. It's not me, Fraser, and it will never be me.