What to do with a full-scale life

"You bloody child!"

Empress Shiji poked the monkey's head hard, and the monkey was embarrassed and helpless.Think of him as a human being all his life, stepping on the sea first and then leveling up to the sky, going up to the poor and down to the underworld, with a strong and proud body, a pair of iron arms, eating the medicine of Sanqing, stealing the queen mother's flat peach, being burned by real fire and also by the thunder of the gods Even if it has been suppressed for 500 years, it will still be the Huaguoshan Monkey King Monkey King Monkey King Monkey King who melted into armor and swung flames into a robe.He is rebellious and never bows his head. He would rather kill fish in RT-Mart than seek a better life with an old friend.

But now, someone called him "dead child".

"Why can't you learn it? We are demons, and demons are demons. Can you have good fruit if you hang out with those things?"

"Fruit? What kind of fruit?"

Hearing the stinky monkey's gag, Empress Shiji stomped her foot and said with her eyes wide open, "Stop fooling around in front of your aunt!"

"Aunt~~ Those are all buddies."

"What's the matter, buddy? They never look down on us demon spirits. Even if they don't say it, they just feel that they are superior. I've seen too many of them."

Facing Empress Shiji's scolding, Monkey couldn't say anything, he could only lower his head and keep saying "Yes, Yes", but if he could listen to it, then he would not be Xun Wukong.

"Aunt~~ What should I do with this thing?"

The monkey kicked the ascetic boat lying next to it, and the octagonal monster next to it immediately grinned at him, and the monkey rolled its eyes: "Little fairy, do you dare to grin with grandpa? If you dare to make a fuss again, grandpa will pull out all your teeth." !"

The octagonal monster was also a bully and afraid of evil, so frightened by the monkey's exposed real body, he scrambled and hid behind the ascetic boat, only daring to show a pair of compound eyes on his forehead to look furtively.

"Okay, don't bother with such pickled things." Shiji Empress also has a lot of dislike for the octagonal monster: "Auntie asks you, have you heard of the new Conferred God?"

"What god? What kind of god?"

Empress Shiji knew that the silly monkey didn't know the situation as soon as she heard it, so she called him to sit down: "You failed to catch up with the ceremony of enshrining the gods back then, and in the end you only fell behind. You can't miss it any more, find someone from your own family and go there, maybe even your aunt will enjoy the blessings with you."

"Go, go, go, go, how many houses have I gone to, which one will have a good end. Humph, let me tell you, it's better to just be an idle monkey in the world, drink dew when thirsty, and eat grasshoppers when hungry."

Empress Shiji slapped the table with hatred for iron and steel: "Why are you so worthless? What a great opportunity now, once in a thousand years. Your aunt lost her life to exchange for Yue Xingjun's broken inheritance. You have to take advantage of this opportunity to seize it." It would be great to be named as the next True Monarch. I don’t care if you want to defeat Buddha in such a shabby way.”

"What kind of Bodhisattva or Buddha, let alone a true king, I want to be the Monkey King, who cares about those false names."

"You bastard!" Madam Shiji said angrily, "How many years have passed, why haven't you grown up at all?"

The monkey sat there feeling a little angry, thinking that he was a golden horse and iron horse who had endured hardships back then, but in the end he failed to fall behind.In the end, even if he became a fight against the Buddha, he was not happy at all. Let alone mentioning that Lingshan was destroyed due to the repeated destruction of Buddha, he, the deputy director of the marketing department, came back from a business trip and faced the company's bankruptcy. The wandering elf goes to eat vegetarian food and chant Buddha every day, which is simply a waste of his monkey nature. If he can't eat it, he really can't eat it, so these years he has already eliminated those thoughts, and he plans to live as a stinky monkey.

"Auntie~~ Don't you even look at what I am now? It's just the strength of such a stick, 20 catties, but it weighs only six tons. Any car on the street with four fronts and eight rears will I can pull more than [-] golden cudgels." The monkey was even a little frustrated as he talked: "It's not that I don't want to, it's that I really can't."

Hearing what the monkey said, Empress Shiji felt a little sorry, she leaned forward and asked curiously: "Then is there any way to recover?"

The monkey shook his head: "I don't know, anyway, I'm just a little stronger than ordinary people."

When it came to this point, the monkey didn't intend to talk about this topic anymore, but continued to talk about the ascetic boat on the ground: "What do you do with this thing, you are not afraid of getting yourself into trouble."

"What trouble can I cause? Is there any trouble in the world that I'm afraid of?"

Seeing Empress Shiji, she didn't seem to know what happened, so the monkey smiled and came forward to briefly describe the situation after the pain boat was injured. A little friend was beaten to the ground, but he knew that Ku Xingzhou had offended someone so bad that he was beaten like that.

As for why he is such a great person, the monkey is not stupid. A person in the age of conferred gods can be beaten like this now, and he can figure it out without having to think about it with the cecum.

After listening to the monkey's description, Empress Shiji's expression also became serious, and the best way to deal with it now is to save the ascetic boat and ask her a good question.

I have to praise Empress Shiji for her amazing brain circuit. The monkey hesitated to speak several times, but in the end he still didn't speak. After all, my cheap aunt has taken care of herself for many years, and let him, the monkey who jumped out of the stone To some extent, he can feel the warmth of home. In his heart, the status of this aunt is comparable to that of his master, or even higher, so even if his aunt's brain circuit is a little strange, she can do whatever she likes. So what if she broke Ling Xiao again.

However, it is obvious that Ku Xingzhou's injury is not easy to heal, so just kidding... The wound caused by Chi You's magic blade, even if the magic energy on it is cleared, it will not be cured easily, but Empress Shiji is doing her best, today He must be cured.

As for the little octagonal monster, that thing is considered a ferocious monster in the human world, but it is now a Gouba in the Three Realms, not to mention Shiji Empress, even the monkey who has been debuffed by the seventh floor does not pay attention to it .

At the same time, Brother Zhang had already had dinner. Sitting across from Brother Zhang was Erlang Zhenjun, Zhang Xu on the left and Nezha on the right. The atmosphere was very delicate, but Zhang Xu didn't understand anything.

Nezha is no longer the super brat he used to be. His sharp edges and corners have been smoothed over many years in the Heavenly Court. Although he is the darkest person after the cut, at least on the surface, this middle-aged Nezha is top-notch.

He was pouring wine for Brother Zhang and chatting with him about the anecdotes of the Three Realms, trying to please him in every possible way, but there were only four words in between the lines—return to me.

On the other hand, Yang Jian is a top-notch tough guy. From the beginning to the present, he has always had a face that is not a face and a nose is not a nose.

"You don't have to hate me so much. It's you who like to make trouble. When I signed the agreement, I did put you all under Class B and Class A control, but the problem is that you feel your conscience and say that every time you go down to the realm for so many years, you are Isn't something going to happen?"

Brother Zhang said it very frankly. He wanted to have a good chat with this guy for a long time, but this time it seems that the chat was not very successful. Yang Jian's attitude is still not very good. A piece of content that Qing Lingzi knocked them over, everyone wants face, and they are all dignified people. Now it is good to be bullied like a chicken, which is unbearable to be honest.

"Actually, the seal I gave you is not a fixed seal."

When Brother Zhang said this, Yang Jian finally had some reactions, and Nezha pricked up his ears and began to listen.Brother Zhang just smiled and said: "You will know when you reach that point."

After speaking, he got up and left, and paid for Nezha and the others by the way.

Seeing him go, Nezha breathed a sigh of relief, grabbed a handful of peanuts and rubbed them into his mouth: "Damn it, I'm so nervous in front of him."

Zhang Xu, who was in a daze beside him, asked at this moment: "Two masters, who is he? Why do you feel that your expressions are not very natural."

Nezha glanced at him three times, then cleared his throat: "Don't ask so many questions, kid."

To say that the man with three eyes is sincere, he slightly raised his head and glanced at Zhang Xu and said, "It is supreme."

"what?"

Zhang Xu was stunned for a moment: "Is he the 'he' you often say?"

"Yeah." Nezha nodded mysteriously: "If you want to talk about it, it has to be three-eyed, and you're going to shake your face at him. It's really because he has always had a good temper. Change it to someone who is irritable and give it to you directly." Catch them and put them in reincarnation, you love dogs so much, even if the underworld works overtime, they will cast you into a wild dog."

Sanyan'er slapped the chopsticks on the table when he heard the words: "Don't talk if you can't talk!"

Zhang Xu turned into a curious baby at this moment, leaned over and asked with a smile: "Master Li, why do you feel that Master Yang...has not a good relationship with him."

"If someone robs your dog, you won't like him. Hey...forget it, Sanyan'er won't tell you, I'll tell you. What's the matter..." Nezha said here , looked at it three times: "Can you say it? If you can't say it, don't say it."

As soon as Yang Jian waved his hand, he took it as a calculation and let him go.

"The story begins with King Wu's defeat of Zhou. We generally believe that King Zhou is the last human emperor. After him, there is only the Son of Heaven in the world, and the Son of Heaven, as you know, is ordered by Heaven. Here At the beginning, it involved a relationship of human rights granted by heaven. And it was during this period that the capable people and strangers in the world neither became gods nor immortals, nor did they crack the soil and become princes. What did they do? A non-governmental organization, the specific name is not important, but there is one Lord named Holy Lord.”

"Ah, Holy Master! I have heard of it."

"Well, at the beginning, the lineage of the Holy Master was just to keep the clarity of the human world, and it has been professionally fighting against the heavens for 3000 years, you know."

Zhang Xu blinked his eyes: "Can you beat me?"

"You underestimate the heroes of the world too." Nezha laughed: "The one who killed us in the 1V3 group just now is a person from the lineage of the Holy Master. And we call such a forceful person the Earth Immortal. I have seen it in Journey to the West. Well, Zhen Yuanzi has heard of it, he beat you, Master Monkey... Well, when he beat us just now, Zhen Yuanzi called him senior brother when he saw him."

"Hiss~~~" Zhang Xu gasped, "And then?"

"The human race is building their own civilized circle step by step in their struggle. At this time, I went to the Three Realms to see it. This is incredible. How come there are so many people in the human world all of a sudden. If you don't intervene, you can't control it."

"After that, the upper three worlds and the human world launched a war... Well, in today's words, it is a culture war. The contention of schools of thought we saw later is the aftermath of this culture war. I don't care whether it is good or bad. It was because of the cultural war between the two sides at that time that the human world groped for a route of its own. What is that? You can be the emperor, but if the people think you are not good, then you will be in the Holy Lord Under the leadership of the leader, the emperor was overthrown, and his mother's emperor was his son." Nezha couldn't help but slapped his thigh when he said this: "These people are really powerful, and they can't fall behind in the struggle of the Three Realms. And By the end of the Spring and Autumn Period and the Warring States Period, this situation intensified, and it was not uncommon for you to ascend the throne today and step down the next day."

"Yes, yes, it was really chaotic at that time."

"Then the two sides saw that this would not work. The higher-ups needed the resources of the human world, and the lower ones needed the human race to prosper. If this continues, no one will be able to make money. So they called the upper three worlds and the mountain and sea worlds to sit together and open a meeting. meeting."

Yang Jian knocked on the table: "On the Tao."

"That's right, talk about the Tao." Nezha patted his mouth: "Look at my bad mouth, I'm not as educated as Brother Three-Eyed."

After he finished speaking, he glanced at the third eye, and then continued: "The result of the meeting is that the upper three realms will no longer interfere in the human world, but the human world must also be restrained, so every force will send one to The two in charge of supervision will go on, but who to send is a big problem, if you go to the enemy camp as a supervisor, can you still have your good juice?"

"Um...indeed."

"In the end, I came up with a particularly awesome idea, which is to send the twelve zodiac animals. Each animal is in charge of a technology such as industry, agriculture and animal husbandry. They are responsible for spreading these technologies to the human world. For example, the twelve spirits Shushu, it was passed down by the people to weave cloth and shoes, and the dragon was passed down to the world, the sun, the moon and the four calendars to get the 24 solar terms, etc. Later, the people praised it and it has become a tradition that has been passed down to this day. It is actually very awesome. If you don’t believe it, go back to your perpetual calendar , you will find that the previous 24 solar terms are almost exactly the same as now, which brings great convenience to farming and nomadic farming.”

Zhang Xu blinked his eyes, listening with relish: "And then."

"Then?" Nezha laughed loudly: "Xiaotiangou is on the dispatch list... No, Sanyan'er has hated the Lord of the World all the way until now."