Phoenix and Legend

Chapter 68 Empathy
On a rainy afternoon in early May, Jinlin stared out of the window in his office, as if he was completely in a misty world. He felt the scene and kept calling Caining's name in his heart...

After get off work, Jinlin drove out of the unit, only to find Bai Feier standing on the side of the road with her umbrella in her hands, looking around, as if she was waiting for someone.

Jin Lin rolled down the car window and asked, "Fei'er, who are you waiting for?"

When Fei'er saw Jinlin, hope suddenly flashed in her eyes. She felt that she had returned to her middle school days. The feeling was no less than staring at Liu Yang, but her expression was as plain as water:

"Oh, Jinlin, I'm waiting for a taxi."

"It's raining so hard, let me take you home."

After hearing this, Mayfair felt very sweet and warm in her heart, her face was still calm, she smiled naturally and said, "Thank you, Jinlin."

After she sat in the car, Jinlin was concerned among his colleagues and asked:

"Fairy, it seems that you are depressed these days, what seems to be on your mind?"

Fei'er lowered her head quietly, her eyes revealed a trace of shyness and sadness like drizzle, she said softly: "I got divorced a few days ago."

Jinlin felt a little abrupt about Fei'er's answer, and his concern, which was originally calm as water, suddenly became turbulent:

"I'm sorry, maybe I shouldn't ask, it makes you think of sad things again."

"It's okay." Fei'er murmured, but there was a hint of hope hidden in her small voice, but Jin Lin didn't notice:
"If you feel uncomfortable, just take a few days off and I will help you with your work."

"No need, it's even more lonely and lonely at home alone." Mayfair said eagerly.

Jin Lin didn't care too much about Fei'er's tone, but he felt the same with her words. Ever since he learned that Cai Ning's "heart belongs to him", he truly experienced unprecedented loneliness and loneliness, heartache, helplessness, and loss. And cold.

"Jin Lin, I see that you have often been thinking quietly by yourself in your spare time recently. Is there something unpleasant?" Fei'er asked with concern.

Facing Fei'er's question, Jin Lin felt very conflicted in his heart. He didn't want to share things related to Cai Ning with others, because Cai Ning in Jin Lin's heart was not something to talk about lightly, but a matter of deep respect and love for her. belief in the heart.He could only change the subject and said politely: "Oh, no, does Mayfair have time, why don't we find a place to have dinner together?"

When Mayfair heard this, she felt a little pleasantly surprised, and said happily, "I really have time tonight. Because of the rain, my brother will pick up the children from school, and I won't come back at night. I'll be bored when I go home. Tell me about the place." , I treat you."

"I think it's better for me to treat you. Last year you helped me print materials, and I still owe you a favor." Jin Lin said with a smile.

"That's what I should do, but, old senior, today I accept your favor, let's go to Best Restaurant!"

"it is good!"

In Best Restaurant, two former alumni and today’s colleagues tasted slightly astringent black pepper steak, drank sweet and sour orange juice, drank memories, and spent the long rainy night together.

"Jin Lin, I remember that you won the first prize in the art painting competition held by the school. Your work at that time was the gouache painting "Under the Indus Tree". reading a book, I think that boy is you?"

"Yes, I wanted to draw a phoenix perched on a tree, but I drew many pictures but I was not satisfied, so I just..." Speaking of this, Jinlin reminisces about the past: Caining is the most beautiful phoenix in his heart , maybe from the time when I made that painting, I was already doomed to miss the "Phoenix", right?

Seeing that Jin Lin was silent, Fei'er asked, "Jin Lin, what are you thinking?"

"I was thinking about that painting, why I didn't draw the phoenix that I liked so much at that time, maybe it was from then on that I deeply felt that my creative ability was limited, so I gradually gave up applying for the exam The idea of ​​the Academy of Fine Arts." After Jinlin finished speaking, he looked out the window and found that the rain was getting heavier and heavier, and he felt a kind of needle-like pain in his heart.

After hearing this, Mayfair shook her head and sighed: "Oh, that's true, it's really a pity." She continued to say calmly: "Actually, I admired you very much when I was in middle school, especially your art works even more impressed me." Admired."

Seeing Fei'er's affectionate look, Jin Lin was a little moved and said, "Fei'er, thank you for your appreciation."

"Jinlin, have you been divorced for so many years and haven't met someone you admire?" Fei'er asked, looking at Jinlin, with a kind of hope in her eyes.

Jin Lin did not meet Fei'er's eyes, but sighed deeply: "Of course, but our fate is so short..."

"I don't think you should be too sad. The fate between people may be like a diary. It has completely recorded what kind of people, what kind of things, and what kind of fate a person will meet in his life. It’s just that what you haven’t experienced is an unknown diary, but there are already definite plans and arrangements in the dark.”

Jin Lin felt that although Mayfair's words were far-fetched, they also had some idealistic truth:
"may be!"

"Jinlin, can we 'relate'?" Fei'er asked with affectionate eyes and special expectation.

Hearing this, Jin Lin was extremely disturbed, and he frowned: "Fei'er is expressing his love to me. If I reject her, how embarrassing she will be. If I don't reject her, but I only love Cai Ning in my heart. Jinlin regretted it very much at this time, and should not have easily expressed his emotional state in a negative state. Is this God's will?He was deeply in a dilemma, so he could only take care of Mayfair with a thoughtful expression, hoping that she would be wise and leave this topic as soon as possible.

Fei'er looked at Jin Lin in deep thought, but she didn't "appreciate", but said with a sour face: "I know you don't like me, and I also know that I am ordinary-looking, so I shouldn't have such naive thoughts at all. ,sorry."

Fei'er's unexpected "self-blame" made Jinlin feel overwhelmed, his heart was drawn to compassionate thinking: "Fei'er, in fact, I am deeply grateful for your concern for me these days. They are classmates, and now they are colleagues, maybe this is fate?" Jinlin and Caining have a very similar mentality, that is, their generosity and open-mindedness, which are not only their strengths, but also the fatal weakness in their relationship , They are drawn into the glacier and snow ridge by this kind of mood, making them want to leave but can't leave, leaving is still stumbled by the cold, wanting to go but can't go out, going out is still sad and cold, can only wait in the cold The warmth of fate and the arrival of luck can leave safely.

When Mayfair heard it, she felt a sudden romance. She said happily: "I knew that the old senior would read 'Old Love' and would not refuse my kindness."

Jinlin looked at this junior high school alumnus, who was tall and thin, with a plain but fair and delicate appearance, and a noble and outstanding temperament, and also felt a kind of admiration without admiration: "May'er, you have an extremely pure and elegant beauty. It feels like French musician Charles Camille Saint-Saens's piano piece "The Swan", which gives people a kind of pure love and leisure imagination."

Bai Fei'er was very honored to be so appreciated by the person she once admired, and she happily "returned the gift": "Jinlin, in fact, what I admired at the time was your innocence, kindness, and perseverance. , when you graduated, every time I went to the playground after class, I walked past the third (3) class you used to study, as if you still hadn't left, but my illusions were shattered time and time again. I really didn't expect that we can still Thank you, Jinlin, for this love."

Bai Fei'er's innocent and sincere words moved Jin Lin gradually. He looked into Fei'er's eyes sincerely and said, "Fei'er, thank you too, it made me feel like I'm back to that innocent middle school age."

After hearing this, Fei'er unconsciously looked at the rain outside the window. It was dark and dense, and she suddenly thought of something: "Jin Lin, we mentioned the topic of art just now, do you remember Liu Ying?"

"Of course I remember that she was not only the best art girl in Wutong County No. [-] Middle School, but also won the first prize in the provincial art painting competition for middle school students. Participated in the competition, but unfortunately lost to Sun Shan.”

"Jinlin, but I remember that you won the Excellence Award, which is commonly known as No.4. This result is already very good. It is not easy to stand out among more than 1 contestants. At that time, only You two." Fei'er praised again and again.

"However, I am quite different from Liu Ying. I remember meeting her when I was about to graduate in my third year of high school. She asked me if I would apply for the Academy of Fine Arts with her. I politely declined because I was already I completely lost confidence in art."

"Jinlin, Liu Ying is a very beautiful and gentle girl. You used to participate in various activities together. Have you ever liked her?"

Hearing this, Jinlin felt a deep sense of loss, not for Liu Ying, but for his sixth sense that developed in high school. The person he answered will never be able to answer his question again.Thinking of this, Jinlin felt a burst of heartache, but still said to Fei'er calmly: "I like it not because of the appearance, but because of the inner feeling."

Fei'er understood what Jin Lin meant, and said sadly, "Liu Ying's life is very desolate and miserable."

When Jin Lin heard this, he felt very confused, because he hadn't had any contact with Liu Ying since he graduated from high school, so he asked with concern, "What happened to her?"

Fei'er nodded, her face became more melancholy, revealing a trace of sorrow and pity, and said in a low voice: "Yes."

"What happened to her?"

"Jinlin, let's talk about this next time, it's too sad."

"Okay." Jin Lin felt that Liu Ying had an extraordinary experience in his heart, and he couldn't help feeling sorry for her.

……

After dinner, the rain kept falling outside the window, and the rain sifted quietly under the street lamp, and thousands of orange-red strands were scattered.

Although the rain is thick and the rainy evening is beautiful, Jinlin doesn't feel any romance. He hopes that at this time, he can see Caining's sincere and kind figure in the rain and walk hand in hand with her. Can be in the legend.Jin Lin felt deeply depressed, but he didn't share his expression with his new lover:

"May'er, let me take you home, let's meet again next time."

Mayfair nodded with a smile, the feelings of a girl in first love appeared on her face, she looked at Jinlin affectionately and said: "Thank you for giving me such a romantic night, allowing me to talk about my thoughts many years ago, I will never forget it in my life." will not forget."

……

Soon came to the downstairs of Taiyin Community where Bai Fei'er lived. After Fei'er got off the car, she opened her umbrella and said politely, "Jinlin, do you want to sit at home?"

"No, let me watch you go upstairs."

"Ok."

Fei'er turned around and took a few steps, then ran back, threw the umbrella on the ground, drenched in the rain, hugged Jinlin tightly, and said affectionately: "Jinlin really hopes that we will get together, don't Let me down! My heart really can't take any more blows." Mayfair said as she shed tears.

"Definitely not!" Jin Lin deeply felt the hotness and tenderness of Mayfair's tears, like the fire of love, and like gentle drizzle.

Fei'er watched Jinlin reluctantly let go of his arms, and said with great concern, "It's raining heavily and the road is slippery. Be careful all the way, and report to me that you're safe when you get home."

"Don't worry, I'll call you when I get home."

Jin Lin picked up the umbrella for Fei'er and put it in her hand. Fei'er held the umbrella, gave Jin Lin a very tender look, turned around and walked upstairs slowly, looking back frequently as he walked, his eyes contained infinite With a warm expression, she is so reluctant to part, so full of affection, although she can't find Jinlin's name in her diary, but Jinlin is still her most romantic and purest memory in her heart.

After Bai Fei'er went upstairs, she hurried to the balcony. Seeing Jin Lin still standing there, she opened the window and waved to him. Then Jin Lin got into the car, started the accelerator, and drove towards home.

(End of this chapter)