As a matchmaker, I'm not convinced by anyone

Chapter 168 The most difficult mother-in-law and daughter-in-law problem

"After marriage, what is the most difficult relationship?"

For this question, at least nine out of ten people answer that it is the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.

I have to say that the conflict between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is really one of the most difficult conflicts in the 5000-year history of our country.The little daughter-in-law meets a powerful mother-in-law, or the weak mother-in-law is bullied by a wicked daughter-in-law. Various versions of the story are staged in many families every day.

Happy Dating Agency.

After Hu Jinhua and Liu Lian went out, Jiang Feng said to Kang Buping who was sitting opposite: "Mr. Kang, let me tell you from your point of view what is the main source of the conflict between your mother and wife?"

Kang Buping said with a sad face: "Master Jiang, in fact, in my eyes, their conflicts are trivial things in daily life.

For example, there are differences in diet. My ancestors are from Guangdong Province. Although I moved to Jiangxi Province from my grandfather's generation, the eating habits passed down from generation to generation cannot be easily changed.Cantonese cuisine is mainly light, and basically does not put chili.

And my wife is an out-and-out Jiangxi native, and she likes everything spicy.

Therefore, since my wife married into my family, she ordered takeaway every now and then.

So conflicts arose. My mother felt that the meals she had cooked so hard were just there. My wife not only refused to eat them, but also had to spend extra money to order takeaways. She really didn’t know how to manage a house.

As for my wife, I also feel that my mother can’t get enough of the bland meals she cooks all day long, and she has to be blamed for paying for takeaway. She has no freedom at all. "

Jiang Feng asked, "Then have you tried to persuade me?"

Kang Buping sighed: "Of course I persuaded and asked my mother to learn how to cook some local dishes. Unfortunately, my mother's cooking skills are mediocre, and the taste of the newly learned dishes is really not flattering. After two or three tastes, I stopped eating it. Then my mother quit, and things inevitably came back to square one."

Jiang Feng nodded, and asked again: "Then besides the difference in diet, what other reasons are there?"

Kang Buping said: "Also, during the process from my wife's pregnancy to childbirth, my mother will follow the concept of the older generation, you can't eat this, you can't eat that, you can't do this, you can't do that, in short, it is more lenient.

Then pregnant women are already irritable, so naturally there are no fewer disputes.

After the child is born, the contradictions become even more.

In short, they quarrel every now and then, and every time they quarrel, the two of them will reveal each other's faults, digging out all the old things before and arguing again, it really annoys me! "

Jiang Feng said understandingly: "It's really not easy for a man caught between his mother and his wife. He is always under the double pressure of 'marry a wife and forget your mother' and 'live with me or live with your mother' , like walking a tightrope, if you are not careful, you will lose your balance."

Kang Buping said with deep helplessness: "Who's to say no? Once they have a dispute, it's wrong for me to help anyone. At first I tried to persuade this and that, but later I found that it didn't work, so I just treated it like that." Played the ostrich.

As long as they have a dispute, I will go as far as I can.

In fact, I know it is not good to do so, but I am really incapable of resolving their disputes, so I can only choose to escape. "

Jiang Feng nodded and said, "I understand, you wait in the hall first, and call your wife in by the way."

Kang Buping said hello, then opened the door and went out.

Soon, his wife Liu Lian opened the door and came in.

Jiang Feng told her to sit down, and went straight to the topic: "Ms. Liu, your husband has just told me about the problems between you and your mother-in-law. Now I want to understand the relationship between you and your mother-in-law from your perspective. How did the conflict arise? Where are your conflicting points? Can you give some examples?"

Liu Lian thought for a while and said: "I feel that my mother-in-law just likes to pick my thorns. I am not used to the dishes she cooks. Many times I don't even have any appetite. I just force myself to eat. Others eat for enjoyment. I eat. It's like suffering.

Sometimes I can’t get enough to eat, and I can’t stand the hunger, so I order my favorite takeaway.

Every time my mother-in-law sees it, she will have a stinky face, making me feel full without eating!

Also, my mother-in-law takes care of it too much.

For example, asking us to go to bed early and get up early like her, I know she is for our own good, but how many young people can go to bed early and get up early?
Also, when I was pregnant, my mother-in-law strictly forbade me to eat chili, saying that what would happen to the fetus if I ate chili, but I have never liked spicy food since I was a child, and there is no saying that people in our place should not eat chili when pregnant .

In addition to chili, there are other things to eat, and I am not allowed to eat this or that. It made my pregnancy more uncomfortable than going to jail. I don’t know how I survived that time.

Then there is the birth of the child. When I was in confinement, I had to take care of the child. Although my mother-in-law also helped with the care, she did this and that all day long, and the child was left to me most of the time.

When the child is sick, she is not in a hurry to take it to the doctor, but treats it with her homemade prescriptions.

When the child started to eat rice cereal, she said not to blow or taste it with her mouth, but she just didn't take it seriously.

When the child is crying, tell her not to rush to hug her, she won't listen.Tell her not to hug the shaking child when she coaxes the child, and she doesn't listen...

In short, during the child's growth, I really quarreled with her every day.

The most terrible thing is that my mother-in-law is still a gossip, and when she gets together with those grandmas and grandmas in the community, she will scold me one or another in front of outsiders. Every time the words reach my ears, I am so angry that I am dying.

There is also express delivery. Although I have received a lot of express deliveries, they are all cheap goods bought online, and everything is useful.

Then my mother-in-law said I was a prodigal...

Anyway, she and I really don't get along, it's a miracle that we don't quarrel for three days together. "

As Jiang Feng listened to Ms. Liu constantly criticizing her mother-in-law, her tone alternated between aggrieved and angry, and Jiang Feng could basically tell that it was indeed as trivial as what Mr. Kang said.

But as the saying goes, 'Small grievances are not forgiven, big grievances will arise', and it is also said that 'frozen three feet, it is not a day's cold', these trivial things can not be resolved in the heart, the problem is natural It's getting worse.

After Liu Lian finished speaking, Jiang Feng nodded and said, "Ms. Liu, I basically understand what you said. Next, you go out of the lobby and wait, and call your mother-in-law in by the way."

Liu Lian responded, and then opened the door and went out.

Soon, mother-in-law Hu Jinhua opened the door and came in.

Jiang Feng waited for her to sit down, and also got straight to the point and asked her to talk about the conflict between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law from her perspective.

But from Hu Jinhua's point of view, the narration is different. I only heard her say: "My daughter-in-law is too ignorant of housekeeping. I don't cook anything she likes, and she doesn't want to do it herself, so she always orders takeaway. , a complete waste of money.

There is also online shopping every day, and there are endless express delivery every day. I have no ability to make money, and I spend hard, and she is not happy to say a few words about her.

Furthermore, during her pregnancy, telling her not to eat this or that was for the good of her and the child, but she didn't appreciate it, thinking that I was meddling in my own business.

After the child was born, I had to buy vegetables, cook, clean, wash clothes, take care of the child, and serve her as a confinement woman. I was so busy that I never had a moment to spare, but she still complained that I didn't help her, it was a white-eyed wolf.

The main conflict is still with my grandson. She always has trouble with me, as if I, as a grandmother, don’t love my grandson. She always talks about this expert or that expert, saying that I am wrong. That's not good.

I, Hu Jinhua, have given birth to three children and brought them up, plus the experience passed down from generation to generation by my ancestors, how can she be compared to her?As for the experts, I don't know. I only know that the three children I brought up in this way all grew up healthy and healthy without any problems. "

When Hu Jinhua talked about her daughter-in-law, she was also full of resentment. Obviously, the relationship between the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law has become very stiff after the long-term quarrel.

As the saying goes, 'Accumulating love makes blessings, accumulating resentment becomes disaster'.

If the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law continue to quarrel like this, maybe one day the quarrel becomes serious, and impulsiveness will lead to disaster. Such extreme examples are not uncommon.

While the three of them were talking about the conflict between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law from their own perspectives, Jiang Feng was also checking their information to prove whether they were lying, so he could find out where the crux of the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law was.

After listening to Hu Jinhua's narration, Jiang Feng smiled at her and said, "Thank you, Ms. Hu, for your narration. Now you go out of the lobby and wait for me for 10 minutes. I will make a comprehensive assessment of the difficulty of your mediation, and then I will talk to you about the charging issue."

"Well, yes!" Hu Jinhua responded, then opened the door and walked out of the mediation room.

Jiang Feng quickly read through the information of the three of them, and confirmed that the dispute between the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law was trivial, and there was no conflict that was difficult to reconcile.

And the main reason why they got to where they are today is "disharmony".

The reason why some mother-in-law and daughter-in-law do not get along well is not necessarily due to personality reasons, but the natural opposition in the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.If the two are not in a relationship of mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, perhaps their personalities can be like a year-end friendship.

But Hu Jinhua and Liu Lian really have different personalities. Even if they are not mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, they will never get along.

This can be seen from the marriage matching value of Kang Buping and Liu Lian:

[Current marriage matching value] 56 (husband and wife relationship 62+ good family relationship 68+ family relationship 38)

[Extreme marriage matching value] 60 (husband and wife relationship 69+ good family relationship 71+ family relationship 40)

The limit matching value of this family relationship is only 40 points, which shows that the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law are really at odds by nature, and it is basically useless to use other mediation methods, after all, the limit is there.

The only way is to use the wall-breaking ability to break through this bottleneck!
　The previous chapter has been revised, and the hypnosis process has almost been deleted. Those who talk about water can go back and read it again. The author still attaches great importance to those who spend money to subscribe. I hope you can continue to subscribe and support, thank you!

　　
　
(End of this chapter)