Doctor of the Great Song Dynasty: In the beginning, Li Qingzhao and Li Qingzhao made a private decis

The other doctors were also in an uproar. No one could think of Fan Zheng who had come up with such an evil recipe and asked people all over the world to use paper to defecate. If this matter spread, it would definitely cause an uproar.

Because the invention of paper represents the inheritance of culture, it is known as an artifact of enlightenment. In the Song Dynasty, when the literary style was at its peak, if it was spread that doctors wanted to use paper for toileting, it would definitely arouse a group of literati and officials throughout the dynasty to become excited.

"Hahaha, what Fan wants is for those old masters to be dissatisfied. He likes to see them displeased with Fan and unable to do anything about him." Fan Zheng said without concealment.

All the imperial doctors couldn't help but smile bitterly. They didn't know the conflict between Fan Zheng and the stubborn scholar-bureaucrats in the court. This time, the excessive killing of Fan Zheng by the government and the opposition was closely related to those old masters.

But now Fan Zheng is not showing any weakness either, and is planning to use paper, a sacred object in the hearts of corrupt scholars, to go to the toilet, completely disgusting them, in retaliation for their moral kidnapping of Fan Zheng.

All the doctors couldn't help but sigh. As doctors, they naturally had no special feelings for paper. Instead, they praised Fan Zheng's evil prescription.

Just as Cai Lun invented paper, which perfectly solved the problem of the inconvenience of bamboo slips and the expense of silk and fur, using paper for toileting also perfectly solved the problem of the hardness of toilet chips and the expense of silk.

Hearing this, Yang Jie smiled bitterly and said: "Brother Fan, think twice. The ancients have never thought of using paper to go to the toilet. The "Teaching New Bhikkhus to Practice Protective Rituals" written by the eminent monk Daoxuan of the Tang Dynasty has records of this in the toilet method, requiring monks to Always have a toilet bag and don't miss it', and it is clearly stipulated: 'No written paper is allowed to be used'."

What is written paper? It is paper that has been used for writing. Even this kind of paper is not allowed to be used in the toilet, which shows that there is zero tolerance for using paper to go to the toilet.

Fan Zheng sneered and said: "You are not allowed to use old writings. Since Buddhism explicitly prohibits it, it means that there must actually be monks doing this. Otherwise, why would there be a prohibition?"

Yang Jie was speechless and could only smile bitterly: "Not to mention that the price of paper is not low, most people can't even use paper to write, so how can they use it to wipe their butts? Besides, paper is too hard. It’s not comfortable to use as a toilet either.”

When Yang Jie said this, his face turned red and he lowered his head.

As Fan Zheng said, if Yang Jie had never used paper to go to the toilet, how could he know that using paper to go to the toilet was uncomfortable.

After Yang Jie finished speaking, other imperial doctors also remained silent. Apparently they had the same experience. They even knew that using used old paper to go to the toilet would make the ink deteriorate and make it even more inconvenient.

Fan Zheng naturally knew the trick. After all, there were some things that could be done in private but not in public.

Fan Zheng looked around and said: "So the doctors are planning to create a new kind of paper that is cheap, low-cost, simple to make, and extremely soft. It cannot be used for writing at all. Isn't this the best of both worlds?"

"Cheap, soft, can't write on."

A group of imperial doctors looked at Fan Zheng. Although Fan Zheng's move was a bit unreasonable, it did have three points of truth. It could not only perfectly solve the problem of expensive paper and make it affordable for the common people, but also reduce the criticism of the scholar-officials.

"And this kind of paper is called toilet paper. Fan decided to sell it in pharmacies as a good medicine to prevent hemorrhoids. This time, Fan wants to see what the moralists say." Fan Zheng sneered.

Yes, what Fan Zheng wanted to create was the most commonly used toilet paper in later generations.

“Sell paper as medicine!”

All the imperial doctors looked at each other. Although they had all kinds of strange Chinese medicines, this was probably the first time they used paper as medicine. However, they could not refute it. After all, if the paper that Fan Zheng said could really be made, it would indeed be helpful in preventing hemorrhoids. , more convenient for the world.

........................

"What, my husband wants to use the paper used by everyone in the world to go to the toilet?"

When she learned about Fan Zheng's plan, Li Qingzhao suddenly felt bad. Now she finally understood what Fan Zheng said about breaking the jar.

Who doesn’t know that paper is the spiritual sustenance of scholar-bureaucrats, and it also represents civilization. It is simply unacceptable for the people of the Song Dynasty to use paper that represents culture to go to the toilet.

And Li Qingzhao was the most talented woman in the Song Dynasty. Naturally, she had special feelings for paper. Even though she was mentally prepared, it was still difficult to accept it.

Fan Zheng shook his head and said: "That's not paper, that's medicine! Medicine used to prevent hemorrhoids!"

At the moment, Fan Zheng reiterated the theory he used to convince all the imperial doctors.

Li Qingzhao couldn't help rolling his eyes. Fan Zheng's words might only be able to convince the doctors who admired him the most. If word spread, it would definitely cause a group of scholar-bureaucrats to attack him.

Li Qingzhao knew that he could not persuade her husband, so he could only make insinuating remarks: "My husband's idea is indeed a good one, but paper is expensive. Where can I find cheap paper?"

Li Qingzhao is a talented woman who naturally knows the price of paper. An ordinary family can't even afford the paper they use to go to school. How can they use paper to go to the toilet?

"The best raw material for papermaking in the world is wood. Its transportation is inconvenient and the process is complicated. Only in this way can we make good paper. The second is bamboo. It is cheap and grows very fast. It is an excellent material for making toilet paper. Unfortunately, The most suitable place for bamboo to grow is the south, and there are a lot of bamboos near Kaifeng, so it is impossible to produce toilet paper on a large scale." Li Qingzhao analyzed it one by one, hoping to make her husband give up this idea, so as not to be caught by the scholar-bureaucrats and fall into passivity again.

Fan Zheng nodded and said: "Wood and bamboo are indeed not suitable for toilet paper, and the cost cannot be reduced at all."

Li Qingzhao suddenly felt happy and advised: "My husband, don't worry, you will find suitable raw materials one day."

Fan Zheng shook his head and said: "One day, in the Song Dynasty, there was a kind of paper-making raw material that was high-quality and cheap, and it was everywhere, and that was reed!"

"Reed?" Li Qingzhao couldn't help but was stunned. He didn't expect that Fan Zheng was going to use reeds to make toilet paper.

Fan Zheng said excitedly: "Yes, it's reed! As long as there are ponds, there are reeds. Kaifeng is adjacent to the Yellow River, and there are reeds everywhere on both sides of the Yellow River. Not to mention that Yunzhou not far away has eight hundred miles of Liangshan water waves. There are even more reeds everywhere, and further south, Yunmengze is also rich in reeds, not to mention Dongting Lake, Poyang Lake..."

Fan Zheng visited the places rich in reeds one by one, and Li Qingzhao discovered that reeds were indeed as Fan Zheng said. They were cheap and available everywhere, and the output in the north and south of the Song Dynasty was extremely huge.

Once reeds are used to make paper, the raw materials are sufficient and cheap, and there is no need for a lot of freight. The cost of toilet paper will be greatly reduced and the needs of the people of the Song Dynasty will be met.

"This might work!"

This time, even Li Qingzhao was excited. Reeds were everywhere, and using reeds to make paper was no secret. However, reeds were too soft and of inferior quality, so the mainstream papermaking raw materials were wood and bamboo.

As for toilet paper, it needs to be soft, so reed paper is the best raw material.

..............................

Chui Gong Hall!

Zhao Xu and the officials were handling government affairs. Nowadays, the national power of the Song Dynasty was booming and the world was at peace. The civil and military officials of the Manchu Dynasty were quite proud of themselves.

Of course, there are also discordant voices. For example, a group of stubborn scholar-officials still insist on the fact that Fan Zheng killed too much and accuse Fan Zheng from the moral high ground.

"Reporting to the officials, dozens of officials are impeaching the imperial physician Fan Zheng for disregarding human life and killing too much. We request the officials to severely punish Fan Zheng." An old censor said again without understanding.

Zhao Xu sneered and said: "Feng Yushi's words are serious. Fan Taicheng has contributed to the destruction of the country. The soldiers of the Eastern Route Army who went out with him suffered very few casualties. Who can defeat him with such a record? Are you trying to force me to suppress the heroes? Is it because of my greatness?" The Song Dynasty is too prosperous, and I still want the Song Dynasty to return to the old situation of being bullied by others." Upon seeing this, Yang Wei, the censor Zhongcheng, quickly smoothed things over and said: "I don't dare, I think the ministers will impeach Fan Taicheng, too. He has good intentions, after all, Fan Taicheng is too young, and if he kills too much, he will inevitably become unruly in the future. If the officials restrain him, he will definitely be able to correct his evil ways and serve the Song Dynasty better. "

Zhao Xu immediately snorted coldly: "I want strong generals who can win battles, not cowards who are timid."

"Your Majesty..." Yang Wei shouted heartbrokenly.

Fan Zheng snorted coldly when he saw this and said: "I don't need Master Yang to tell me how to act. Could it be that Master Yang often submits memorials and asks officials to be frugal because it is beneficial to the country? Why don't you submit memorials to destroy Liaoxia and regain Yanyun Shi?" Strategies for the Six States.”

Yang Wei said proudly: "As long as the officials lead by example and are frugal and pro-government, they will surely one day lead the Song Dynasty to regain the sixteen states of Yanyun."

Seeing this, Fan Zheng smiled evilly and said, "In that case, Fan will follow the example of all of you today and advise officials to be frugal."

"Would you advise officials to be frugal?"

Suddenly, all the officials in the court were in disbelief. Fan Zheng, who had been doing evil things all the time, and whose memorials were unexpected, was now trying to persuade officials to be thrifty like them. This was like the sun rising from the west.

Zhao Xu couldn't help but feel a headache. He often heard the stubborn scholar-bureaucrats admonishing him. He didn't expect that Fan Zheng, who understood his thoughts best, would also imitate those scholar-bureaucrats in admonishing him to be frugal.

"I'm reporting to the officials, I have my own notes!" Fan Zheng pretended and cupped his hands towards Zhao Xu.

Zhao Xu glared at Fan Zheng angrily, but when he saw that Fan Zheng was unmoved, he finally nodded helplessly and said: "It's accurate!"

Fan Zhengzheng said: "I heard that the palace uses silk silk to go to the toilet. Countless silks are consumed every year, which is a big expense for the palace. Our court pursues frugality. If we can save these silks, we can make money." How many people have been able to keep out the cold, please let the officials think twice!"

"Uh!"

As soon as Fan Zheng said this, the entire Chui Gong Hall was immediately embarrassed.

No one thought that Fan Zheng's frugality would be so embarrassing and openly talked about in the court.

Fan Chunli couldn't bear it anymore and angrily shouted: "You traitor, don't talk nonsense!"

Fan Zheng said disapprovingly: "My child, what's wrong? The poor people of the common people have no clothes to cover their bodies, but the officials, as emperors, use silk silk to go to the toilet, and the silk silk consumed every year is not cheap. This kind of waste is not acceptable for ministers." Being able to sit idly by and refuse to use silk to go to the toilet, Fan Mansion will set an example."

Making a piece of clothing can be worn frequently, but the silk silk can only be thrown away after using the toilet. Calculated in this way, the silk silk required for the toilet alone is a large amount every year.

Fan Chunli was stunned for a moment. He did not expect that Fan Zheng would burn the fire directly into Fan's mansion.

"Moral kidnapping!"

Zhao Xu was about to cry at this moment. He finally realized what it was like for Fan Zheng to be kidnapped by morality. This was simply impossible to argue with!

As the most noble emperor in the world, he doesn't use silk to go to the toilet. How can he be like ordinary people who can't afford to use the toilet.

"It's not just official families. I heard that it is common for high-ranking officials and nobles in Kaifeng to use silk to go to the toilet. If they can save this, it will be a blessing to the world. Thank you very much, Fan, for the poor people all over the world." Fan Zheng The words changed and he pointed the finger at the civil and military officials of the Manchu Dynasty.

"Uh!"

All civil and military officials suddenly felt as if they had shot themselves in the foot. At this moment, they finally experienced the moral kidnapping personally.

Cai Jing said angrily: "We don't use silk, how can we still use toilet chips like ordinary people?"

All the civil and military officials nodded in agreement. At this moment, no one supported Fan Zheng.

Fan Zheng shook his head and said, "Of course not. Using toilet chips can easily cause hemorrhoids, so it's also inappropriate."

"Then what should we do? People have three urgent needs. Why don't I go to the toilet while I wait?" Yang Wei said sarcastically when he saw this.

Fan Zheng spread his hands and said: "Fan is only responsible for admonishing the officials and ministers to be frugal. Anyway, Fan's purpose of gaining fame and reputation has been achieved. How to operate it depends on you."

"That's nonsense!" Yang Wei suddenly blushed. Fan Zheng took this opportunity to ridicule his unrealistic advice and gain fame.

"Buying fame and fishing for reputation!"

Hearing Fan Zheng speak so bluntly, all the ministers were speechless.

"I'm kidding, how could Mr. Fan be like Mr. Yang and just give advice but not solve the problem? Mr. Fan has a way to get the best of both worlds, which is both frugal and as soft as silk." Fan Zheng said loudly. road.

At that moment, he took out a roll of white stuff from his arms, which turned out to be the toilet paper of later generations.

"What is this?" Zhao Xu asked confused.

Fan Zheng said loudly: "Doctors are fighting against hemorrhoids, the most common stubborn disease in the Song Dynasty, but they encountered the same problem that I was waiting for today in the court, that is, the toilet chips are too hard, the silk is too expensive, and nine out of ten people in the world have hemorrhoids. But it had to be solved.”

"Nine out of ten people have hemorrhoids, and people all over the world have been suffering from hemorrhoids for a long time!" Prime Minister Su Song sighed. He was a Confucian and a doctor, so he naturally knew the dangers of hemorrhoids very well.

Fan Zheng continued: "Just when Fan was in trouble, he suddenly had an idea. The problem was exactly the same as it was a thousand years ago. The slips were too heavy and the silk was too expensive. So Cai Lun invented papermaking, thus solving the problem of writing. Problem, Fan learned from Cai Lun's method, found a good way to treat hemorrhoids, and created toilet paper."

Fan Zheng picked up the toilet paper in his hand and gestured to the courtiers with a proud look on his face.

The Manchu officials glared at Fan Zheng one by one, pointed at Fan Zheng and said tremblingly: "You evil doctor Fan Zheng, you are really evil and untamable. You actually instigated the officials to use paper to go to the toilet. It is an insult to gentlemen." .”

"Disgraceful to politeness!"

"I sincerely request the officials to severely punish Fan Zheng!"

………………

Fan Zheng suddenly aroused public excitement and was impeached by hundreds of officials in the court. Even his father Fan Chunli and Medical Party leader Su Song looked at Fan Zheng rather unkindly. (End of chapter)