Merry Eunuch Lang

Early in the morning, Wang Shigui was hugging a few maidservants, laughing and chatting about the past and the present under the hot quilt!Cui'er girl said: "Master's one is really big." Hong'er girl said: "You have never seen a big one, let the master tell you a big story!" Let's talk again." Fei'er girl said: "It's five or eight if you go, forty if you don't go, if you go half an hour late, they can turn the world upside down? What can that stupid emperor do to you?" Yan'er girl said: "Master If you are eccentric, tell them, if you don’t tell us, you have to listen to the big story.”

The master had no choice but to speak:

There is a person who is extremely majestic and huge.One day when I went to take a bath by the river, I just took off my pants and sat on the bank, and the words stuck out accidentally.Because it is so long, one end reaches the other side of the river.At this time, a new daughter-in-law came over, and when she reached the river, she sighed: "It is fashionable to take a boat to ferry back to my mother's house in the morning, and a bridge was erected in the blink of an eye, so fast!" After the new daughter-in-law thought about it, Tingting walked across the "bridge".At this time, another old man came over, a little puzzled, how could such a strange bridge grow in the sky?The old man looked at it for a moment, thinking that if the new daughter-in-law could live, so could he.So the old man wandered to the center of the "bridge", and saw a thatched jungle covering the sun, which made him feel very comfortable.Then he took out the pipe and the pot, sat on the ground, lit the fire and smoked.After smoking the cigarette, he knocked the cigarette pot on the pier lightly. At this moment, the "Big Bridge" suddenly lifted up and threw the old man into the river with a "thump".The old man knew how to swim, and finally climbed out of the river, complaining: "It's been a suspension bridge for a long time, and the gate of the city is closed without a warning. It's a pity that my ancestral cigarette pot..."

At this time, I heard the servant rushing to report:

"Master, it's bad, the army rebelled! Surrounded the city gates on all sides, and thousands of soldiers gathered outside the Wuchao gate, holding knives, axes, swords and halberds, shouting slogans loudly: If the queen mother does not come out, she will die with peace! Etc."

Prime Minister Wang hurriedly asked the maid to pull up his trousers. When he felt something was wrong, why didn't he wear underwear?After searching for a trouser fork for a long time, he took off his trousers and put them on again.Flustered and nervous, it took a while to sort it out.

Lao Wang has been fond of dancing and writing articles all his life.Since childhood, I have followed the ancient motto of "a gentleman uses his mouth but not his hands", and never fights, fights violently, or fights fiercely. .He relied on his true ability to obtain a Jinshi, starting from the county magistrate of the seventh rank, and rose step by step until he reached the position of an extremely powerful minister, with power over the world, and he never came to the world in vain.People are afraid of being dissatisfied. It is reasonable to say that Wang Lao's life is not bad. If he died a few years earlier, he might end up as a loyal minister.The matter happened after the death of the first emperor, and the power to select the prince fell into his hands. This time, the old guy suddenly developed selfishness, and picked one out of a hundred, and put the purple jade dragon crown on the fool's head.When a fool is in power, it means he has the final say.He is the only one who is the only one in the court, civil and military officials have consulted with him in advance to ask for instructions and report, and the little emperor has become a little puppet.At this time, he suddenly realized a truth: sitting in the world is actually so easy!

Prime Minister Wang's ambitions were growing day by day, and with almost no effort, all the ruling and opposition parties were replaced by his staff, except for the Tong family.Just when he borrowed foreign soldiers and was about to make things happen, he didn't expect that a little guy who didn't know what to do would appear on the way.Although the little eunuch is small, he is a ghost.With his little ability, he was able to put down the chaos of the Fankou?There are still [-] soldiers at the border, and after the division, they have been firmly grasping the military power.Fortunately, this eunuch turned out to be a fake, since he and his daughter had already done that and gave birth to a little prince.A son-in-law and a son-in-law, in the future, his grandson will be in the world, but he will not be half of his old Wang's family, so he reluctantly endured this tone.

His old king is no longer looking for trouble, how dare someone look for trouble?What do you mean "the queen mother will not come out, and she will not die with peace"?The queen mother is not like her stupid son, she is a fine person.Once she comes to the court and assumes authority, how can he, Wang Shigui, have a place to speak?If the incident five years ago is found out again, what's the deal?

Prime Minister Wang muttered while thinking, the sedan chair had already arrived outside the Wuchao gate while speaking.The soldiers didn't beat or scold him when they saw him, but just chanted slogans to themselves: "The empress dowager please listen to the government behind the curtain!" , enjoy the harem, what kind of official do you come out for!Are all men dead?

When the little emperor saw Prime Minister Wang coming to court, he hurriedly shouted all the way: "Yafu, Prime Minister, what do you think should be done about this matter?"

Wang Shugui glanced at the little eunuch, and said angrily, "Why are you asking me? You are asking your brother!"

The stupid emperor couldn't get any advice from the old prime minister, so he had to turn his gaze to the little eunuch again, and said, "Your brother, you have been silent for a long time, but you are helping me to give advice!"

The little eunuch stood a step forward, said long live, and said: "The old lady must not call the court before the court!"

"What what? My old lady is only 43 years old. You actually call her an old lady. Is she that old? My mother is also your mother. Are you so disrespectful to the elderly?" The stupid emperor retorted displeased.

"Since Pan Shangshu said it's not allowed, the minister also thinks it's not allowed." Wang Shugui's eyes lit up, thinking that the little eunuch was talking to him.

"The two of you speak nicely, so who will talk to the soldiers outside?" The little emperor couldn't help asking because the matter on his eyelids was important.

"Whoever is the soldier will tell." Prime Minister Wang squinted at the little eunuch.

"Emperor brother, you should go." The little emperor turned to the little eunuch again.

"Can you agree to their conditions?" The little eunuch stared at the little emperor maliciously, but the corner of his eyes fell on Prime Minister Wang.

"It is absolutely impossible to agree. The hen crows and the rooster lays eggs. Isn't this a big turn of events?" Wang Shugui said angrily.

"Well, let's just spend our time here, don't eat lunch, don't eat dinner, and sleep in the hall." The little eunuch teased lukewarmly.

"Didn't you just say that you can't come to court?" Wang Cheng asked instead.

"I mean that you can't be in charge of the court, but I didn't say that you can't listen to the government behind the curtain? What's the big deal, it's nothing more than a lot of chairs, and it's not that there is no place to sit?" The little eunuch muttered.

"Yes, yes! Isn't it just a matter of having more chairs? This matter is settled like this. Come on, pass on my will and agree to the conditions of the troublemakers."

Prime Minister Wang suddenly discovered that the little eunuch turned out to be a white-eyed wolf!When it happened, he and he couldn't pee in the same pot at all, or they weren't passengers on the same boat at all.From this point of view, all the good food and wine that their family entertained were fed to the dogs!There is no need to guess, this mutiny must be caused by him again, what he wants to do, any fool knows, but the emperor doesn't.If he didn't fight hard, the consequences would be disastrous. He felt that he was weak, so he used his eyes to search for his henchmen.

However, these people, headed by Wen Shichang, are all of Jinshi background, are familiar with poetry and books, and are full of knowledge. Let them verbally criticize, criticize, and verbal swords are experts. If you really want to be serious, you can't!Outside there are tens of thousands of soldiers and horses waving flags and shouting. The soldiers are overwhelming the city, and a few rush in without warning. When scholars meet soldiers, they can't explain why.It's better for Xu Shu to enter Cao Ying --- it's better not to speak.

Prime Minister Wang still needs to speak, and the imperial decree has been drawn up by the little emperor.The little eunuch held the emperor's official document in his hand and asked Wang Shugui:

"Old Prime Minister, is this decree announced or not?"

Wang Shugui was at a loss, of course he didn't dare to disobey the sacred order, so he had to push the boat along the way and said, "Declarate! How can the emperor's will not be announced?"

The little emperor did such a clever thing in his whole life.

In all honesty, the Empress Dowager Tong Biyu believed in women's morals and didn't want to listen to the government behind the curtain and interfere in the government.But when she didn't leave the mountain, someone plotted against her life, and the empress dowager was also forced to go to Liangshan.