Died three times, the third ex-husband went crazy

"I... just woke up and couldn't fall asleep. I heard that you didn't sleep all night. I'll come and see you."

"Then I'll let the kitchen prepare breakfast. Just in case, there aren't many maids in the yard, so why don't Ayu wash up in my yard?"

Lin Yu nodded reluctantly.

It doesn't matter where you wash your hands, she asked, "Aren't you tired? Do you want to take a rest?"

"...No problem."

"By the way, why do you wear a bamboo hat so early in the morning?"

"The appearance is ugly... unsightly."

"But, haven't I already seen it?"

Li Ying shook her head stubbornly: "Now, it's even uglier."

Soon a maid brought a series of toiletries and led Lin Yu into the room.

After Lin Yu finished washing and changing clothes, Li Ying sat on a chair and quietly handed her a thin booklet.

"This is the luggage I prepared for you, see if there is anything else you need."

This booklet is very similar to the booklet that servant recited beside Li Ying just now, and it contains about the same content.

"You want to ride lightly and lightly, so the things I wanted to bring you were compressed to the point where a carriage can be loaded as much as possible, and then I tried to reduce them to the point where a horse can carry them all." Li Ying's tone sounded embarrassing. Anxiety: "But in this way, you can only carry some essential supplies."

"Didn't you arrange a supply point on the road? Since you can get supplies along the way, why do you need to bring so many things? If it is too heavy, it may affect the speed of the horse."

"But always just in case..."

Lin Yu interrupted him: "I want to talk to you."

"Talk about what?"

"Talk about what Shu Yin told you."

"You shouldn't have said so much in front of him."

"why?"

"Instead of answering why, it's better to say, why does Ayu want to reveal all her secrets...? This is very dangerous."

"Maybe it's because... I'm going to find Cang Tao. In my previous life, I married him and never left after I went to the grassland. So this time I also always feel that... once I go to him, I might go back not coming."

"No, this time you have us to help you."

"Yeah, I have you this time, and I have missed several lifetimes with Chen Ci, so I hope this time, I can tell him everything, so that even if I don't come back, I won't have any regrets. "

"Then... why did Ayu tell me?"

"Because I don't want our life to become a miss, and I don't want us to be misunderstood before." Lin Yu said: "Shu Yin told me last night, he said, he hates not talking. I think, Isn't that what Zhu Rongzhan and I are like? I hate that feeling... the feeling of hating the wrong people and things, I don't want to do that again."

"I'm clearly the one Ayu has given up on, so what's the point?" Li Ying smiled wryly, "I'm the one Ayu chose at the beginning... and later felt inappropriate, whether I missed it, misunderstood, or what is the relationship?"

"I concealed this secret for life after life. When I decided that no one could accept the real me, I gave up having a real connection with this world... A person is very lonely."

Li Ying already had the answer in her heart: "Chen Ci opened your closed heart."

However, Lin Yu said, "No."

Li Ying was slightly taken aback: "That's...Zhu Rongzhan?"

Lin Yu still shook his head.

Li Ying asked blankly, "Who is that?"

"It's you." Seeing that he had guessed for a while, but he seemed to have forgotten himself, Lin Yu couldn't help but smiled helplessly.

"I?"

"At that time, Zhu Rongzhan told me the truth, but I didn't believe it, because it was just his one-sided story and there was no evidence. You told me that you killed me with your own hands."

Li Ying was at a loss for a moment: "Can this be counted?"

"You proved Zhu Rongzhan was telling the truth, you made me realize...there are still good things in this world."

He said softly, "That's Zhu Rongzhan who made you feel good, not me."

Li Ying was wearing a bamboo hat, and the layer of tulle completely blocked his expression. Lin Yu could only tell his emotions from his tone of voice, but he was good at disguising and concealing, and his voice changed very little.

Lin Yu said, "Actually, I don't hate you."

Li Ying didn't speak.

She stretched out her hand towards his bamboo hat, but he hesitated for a moment, and stood where he was without avoiding it.

Lin Yu took off the bamboo hat from his head, and saw a haggard face.

"When I was killed by you, I was very angry and painful. I remember the feeling at that time, but when you told me this, I was already the fourth life." She looked into Li Ying's light purple eyes Mou, "I just feel very tired and meaningless."

"Ayu..."

"I think there must be something wrong with me. But I can't feel the value of my life. What cares about things like dirt and dust?"

"not like this……"

"You don't have to persuade me, I know what you want to say - how could life be unimportant? Right?" Lin Yu smiled slightly: "I know what 'normal' looks like, so I realized that something seemed wrong with me After that, I tried my best to become 'normal'. I imitated the behavior that a 'normal' person should have. I tried my best to show that I hate you, blame you, and not forgive you. But there is always a voice in my heart that is indifferent Said: He just killed me once, so what's the problem?"

Li Ying: "What should I do...? What should I do to make you feel better?"

"I'm much better now." Lin Yu said with a smile: "Because Zhu Rongzhan was willing to risk his life to save me, at that moment, I felt the importance of me. I suddenly realized that maybe I am not what I thought Insignificant, maybe I can see myself as more important. Later, I met Chen Ci again, and he said that he never gave up on me, and he never regretted meeting me. I really... I am very grateful to Zhu Rongzhan, and I am also very grateful to him And you...and you have been helping me, thinking that I was kidnapped by someone in an accident, and brought someone to rescue me."

"Ayu is really cunning." Li Ying smiled wryly: "You said that I opened your closed heart, and that it was Zhu Rongzhan and Chen Ci who made you feel no longer alone in this world...It really is rain and dew, every day Everyone is taken care of.”

"I'm telling the truth, I'm not making up lies to buy people's hearts. Otherwise, why would I ask Shu Yin to tell you?"

"Let Shu Yin pass it on to me?"

"Yeah, Shu Yin also told about you, about you standing outside the yard, saying that if Zhu Rongzhan died, the contact with me would be completely cut off, etc. It sounds pitiful..."

Seeing that Lin Yu might think that he was deliberately using Shu Yin to use bitter tricks, Li Ying panicked, "I told him not to say anything!"

"But Shu Yin said, you clearly know his character, but you still want to tell him, just want him to tell me these things." Lin Yu smiled: "So I thought, why don't you just tell me that too?" You, lest I explain it to Chen Ci again, and have to tell you the same thing again."

Seeing her explaining so clearly before leaving, Li Ying couldn't help but feel uneasy: "Ayu, I know how important Zhu Rongzhan is to you, but you have to remember that even if you fail to save him, you And me, you still have Chen Ci, don't you still have your dream of going to the Mantis Army to live a free life?"

"Where did you go?" Lin Yu shook his head: "I just... don't know which will come first, tomorrow or the accident. If something happens to me and I can't come back, I don't want to close my eyes in this life I have to regret not being able to tell you all my true thoughts. After all, we have been able to get to the present in this life, we can know each other, and we have been together for so long, it always feels very difficult, and I don’t want to regret it.”

"You will come back, Ayu." Li Ying said seriously, "You will come back smoothly."