It's a diary

Chapter 45 b6
I started yawning again, but I didn’t want to sleep yet, I had a headache.

He said it was around [-] degrees today and he was afraid of the cold.But it's actually okay. It's not as scary as I thought. It's not too cold, and I still feel hot occasionally.

Especially inside the mall, it was so hot that I wanted to take off my coat.

I started to regret it not long after I went out, because it was really hot! The wind was just a bit cool, but it became hot after a while.

As usual, I ate wontons across the old street just like I went out every week.The boss must have remembered me. He always smiles when he sees me.

I am quite stubborn. If I like something, if nothing happens, I will continue to like it.

During those few days, I was joking with another girl, saying that as a sign of piety, I had to walk from school to the temple.

She couldn't laugh or cry after hearing this and said, "Okay! I'll drive slowly next to you and watch you go."

Today was similar, I walked there.

We walked from the old street, which I heard is a very spiritual temple.

I didn't feel tired, but felt fun and tight.So far, I have walked almost [-] steps, just shy of [-].If I had known better, I would have wandered outside for a while before coming back.

Came back early today.I came back around six o'clock.

I don’t want to come back so early, I like to stay outside, just by myself, and be peaceful.

It was really too small, there was only one building.

Also very old.

There are many stone tables and benches at the door. Sitting there, you can see the flowing water of the Qingjiang River.Staying in a place like this, you can really think about nothing and be quiet all of a sudden.

Sometimes I unconsciously wonder if I could survive in this kind of environment forever if I were a bird.

No one knows this.

I remember passing by a certain bridge and looking at the Qingjiang River below. There was much less water and it was much cleaner. I could see the stone beach and yellow mud under the river.It turns out that it is so shallow. I thought it was very deep.

I originally thought that the big prayer tree at the entrance of the temple was a banyan tree, but because I started to notice that it had fibrous roots hanging down, I thought it was a banyan tree.

Later, when I took off my shoes and stood on the stone table to tie the prayer belt, I discovered that it was not the case.I used to see that kind of tree in the mountains.You can always meet them on the way to the grave.

I was shocked when I saw the bundles of incense and didn’t know how to put my hands on them.The uncle, who looked quite young, said: "There are 21 sticks in a bundle, and each god should be worshiped three by three in order."

I asked again hesitantly: "How much is appropriate?"

He replied: "Anything is fine, just the same idea. Don't ask for money, just fate."

The main person is the God of Thunder, followed by Guanyin Buddha.The Queen Mother and the God of Wealth.The last three are worshiped towards Qingjiang outside the temple - to worship the gods.

While we were worshiping the Lord God, another tourist looked at us in a hurry, with panic in his eyes.Just ask us to bow down, make wishes, and put incense.

I smiled and said that I must pass every exam.

He also smiled not far behind me, "But it's okay. At worst, I will work and study part-time from now on."

I paused and continued: "Yes! No matter what, you also need to study."

"Ah."

…As for that prayer tape, I wrote a lot of things on it.I wrote too much about the content and forgot a lot of it.As you all know, I talk a lot of nonsense, so I wrote a lot of nonsense above.

Please pray that this winter will be warm and I can get through it easily.

Followed by the six words "Read it every year, and have peace every year."

What I want to tell you the most, what I hope to realize the most, are the six words "Remember me every year, and have peace every year."

It must be so.

I hate surprises, hate all surprises.

If you like it, you like it; if you dislike it, you dislike it.If you like something, keep liking it. If you hate it, hate it forever. Don't like it and then hate it. If you hate it, you can like it again.Such a result, tsk, can only be a pity.

It’s not good to have health but not have it, to be liked but also disliked, to give affirmation but also be full of doubts... This is not good.

This winter I want to be peaceful, next spring I want to like flowers more, and in summer I want to boldly and enthusiastically do what I want to do.Then in September, when it was already autumn in other places and the heat was still unbearable at 21 degrees north latitude, I came to Qingzhou from Beiyu, and then smiled and said to the teacher: "Long time no see!"

My classmates took me on bicycles to walk along the small roads in Qingzhou, just like when I took the hippopotamus to see the sea.

It's annoying and boring.

Everything is fake, everything is happy and everything looks fine.It's all an illusion.As for what it is, I don’t know, don’t ask me.

I am a slacker, a salty fish, a fool, and a fool.It can be anything.Anyway, it’s right not to do your job properly.But I just like this, ah, let the cruel society eliminate me.

How can it be so easy.

I want to stay where I am now, without advancing or retreating, without worrying about anything or thinking about anything.Don’t make choices, don’t get involved in right and wrong.

Week ten, it’s over.

5x10＝50。减去元旦的一天假期，还剩49；再减去校运会的五天，剩44。

After another 44 days of classes, I will have a holiday.

Will you really be happy when you return to Beiyu?

To put it another way, if I was unhappy in Beiyu, will I be happy when I come to Qingzhou?
No.

If I am not happy here now, I will go back to Beiyu... Tsk, the answer is obvious.

I'm just stupid. After all this time, year after year, I still can't learn to be happy, and I still can't figure out how to be happy.

Just know to live.

You should live because of your survival instinct.

want to drink.You can fall asleep after drinking alcohol.

Can't drink.Don't even think about it.

Everyone, please stop reading this kind of negative and stupid literature.Look more at the sun and the moon.

　Tomorrow will continue to be thirty degrees, how can it not stop?It's pretty good, but I can't stand the cold.

　　
　
(End of this chapter)