i'm not a bad man

Chapter 456 Burned and destroyed, destroyed and burned again

What I smashed was not just the facilities in the RV, but also my previous life. I watched coldly, the fire in my heart burned and extinguished, extinguished and burned again, but the only one who was burning was me. The level of pain, It was as if my left and right arms were torn off, and a handful of salt was sprinkled on the wound.

I finally realized that Lu Xi was gone, and she left her most precious things to me, but she also took away all my expectations and fantasies; so that throughout the morning, all I could think about was what she said she wanted to do with her. I get married and can never be separated.

Someone must have said something to her, or even threatened her, otherwise she would not leave in this way. This is a kind of farewell, so she gave herself to me, so that when she thinks of our relationship, she also It's not all a pity.

But what attitude should I use to treat her farewell?And does her farewell also mean a kind of fulfillment?
My heart became colder and colder, so cold that I lost all feelings for everything. I even began to hate this RV that had accompanied me through 296 cities, as if all the partings happened in it.

I sold it as scrap. This time, I calmly watched the whole process, watching the owner of the scrap collection station drive away, and then went to the nearby second-hand car market without looking back and bought it. A second-hand SUV replaced it.

……

In the evening, I drove this newly bought second-hand SUV back to the small town. I didn’t see anyone. I was alone by Shuanglong Lake, half drunk and half awake, and then drunkenly watched the sunset burning the sky red. , the lake water was also reflected red, and when the wind blew, it looked like blood was surging...

I finally threw the bottle aside and slumped down on the bench. There was no sadness or joy in my heart anymore, only endless loneliness. After being lonely, I began to hate some people again, led by Qin Minhong and Yang Yiming...

I kept breathing heavily to relieve the discomfort of being choked by alcohol. Night fell at this time, and I became more and more invisible, so that I could hardly feel my existence.

Until Zhao Yingrou, who was far away in Tianjin, called me.

I shook my head vigorously, trying to wake myself up, and then answered Zhao Yingrou's call: "Is something wrong?"

"Where are you? Why does it feel so empty over there?"

I looked around and replied: "I am next to the lake in the scenic area..."

"Still busy at work?"

"Can you please stop asking so many questions...if you have anything to do, just tell me directly."

"Can't you feel that I'm paying attention to your emotions? ... What I'm going to tell you is not a good thing. I'm telling you directly because I'm afraid you won't be able to accept it."

"I'm not in any mood right now, so there's nothing I can't accept."

"Then I'll tell you..." After a short pause, Zhao Yingrou said again: "Xiao Chen just called me and said that the institution that previously funded Jiani's treatment no longer pays Jiani's medical expenses... ...Now the hospital is going to perform a stem cell transplant on Jiani, and the total cost is about 40... What Xiao Chen meant by calling me is, is the stem cell transplant necessary? If it is not necessary, can it be transferred back to our hospital? , replace it with other less expensive treatment options... Of course I have to call you to discuss this matter... Judging from Jiani's current situation, stem cell transplantation is necessary... I do not recommend other treatments. Plan instead... I'm afraid you have to pay the cost... But this so-called stem cell transplant is not a once-and-for-all solution, because it is only possible to cure leukemia. First of all, stem cell transplantation has the possibility of immune rejection. In addition, stem cell transplantation will Some complications, such as infection, can be fatal...so the consequences may cause you a lot of financial pressure."

What Zhao Yingrou said gave me a suffocating feeling like someone was strangling my neck. Of course I knew why that institution stopped paying Jiani's medical expenses.This was Yang Yiming nakedly putting pressure on me. I am afraid that from the moment he chose to bring Jiani to BJ for treatment, he had already regarded this matter as a bargaining chip against me.

This person's scheming is really too deep, so last night, Lu Xi made such a sigh. She said that Yang Yiming's body seemed to be occupied by another person, and Lu Xi's departure was definitely not an accident. Combined with Xiao Chen's Judging from the predicament at hand, it is very likely that she was subjected to some kind of coercion. The fundamental purpose of these coercions was to trample me under my feet, ravage me severely, and then withdraw in embarrassment after losing her self-esteem.

……

I finally replied: "I won't care about this anymore."

Zhao Yingrou couldn't believe her ears. After a long time, she said, "You said you don't care? ...What about Xiao Chen and Jiani? Now stem cell transplantation is their only way out."

"What would they have done if they hadn't met me?"

"But you have given them hope. You brought them to me."

"Yes, I brought them to your place, but later, they were brought to BJ by Yang Yiming... This is no longer my responsibility."

"The words...that's what they say, but you are like this..."

"What's wrong with me? It's because I'm too kind, too talkative, and too ignorant of the sufferings of the world... That's why I've become a weak spot... Others can plot against me whatever they want... Zhao Yingrou, you just When the former Han Chao is dead, don’t call me again about this matter... That’s it.”

After saying that, I ended the call with Zhao Yingrou, and then looked blankly at the last fiery red spot on the horizon. It was like the blood in my heart was gradually swallowed up by the darkness and disappeared.

At the moment when the fiery red color completely disappeared, I sent a voice message to Xiao Chen: "Xiao Chen, I have heard from Zhao Yingrou about your situation with BJ... If you still want to save Jiani, Then collect the evidence that the organization has promised to fund you...and then find the media to expose their dishonest behavior. If no media dares to expose it, you can find a short video platform to expose it yourself...it may be dangerous, but for This is the only way, kid.”

After sending this voice message, I put the phone aside, then picked up the wine bottle and took a sip of white wine... The white wine made my chest feel hot, but there was only indifference left in my heart.

At this moment, I have completely changed my logic of doing things. If it were before, I would have taken Xiao Chen and Jiani back to Zhao Yingrou's hospital at all costs, even if it was beyond my ability, I would have to pay for the medical expenses in advance; but at this moment , my first reaction was to point the finger at the initiator of this incident. I was unwilling to let anyone become my weakness, let alone Yang Yiming, who had understood my mentality and ravaged me wantonly.

……

I was finally no longer angry. I gently placed the empty wine bottle on the ground, and then left the scenic spot with a calm mind, integrating myself into the hustle and bustle of this small town again.

(End of this chapter)