A leisurely life that begins with the possession of a game character

Chapter 1120 Willingness
Of course, one can also complain about people like this, saying that they are just idle.

Living alone is generally not a big problem as long as you can interact with outsiders and communicate with others during your stay.

As for the situation where a person feels crazy and has a tendency to depression after being lonely for a long time, in most cases it is caused by some kind of change that causes the person to become completely isolated.

When a person does not communicate with the outside world, it is not surprising that anything can happen.

When Zhang Jintao just graduated, he felt that his job was not ideal at first. He looked for several jobs but was not satisfied with any of them, so he stayed at home for a while.

At that time, his room was like a hibernation chamber. After returning home, he went straight to the hibernation chamber, lying on the bed in a daze, continuing to study, playing with his mobile phone, he could do whatever he wanted without having to worry about others.

He is a rather lazy person. When he was in school, the takeout boxes in the rented house would lie in the trash can for days, the floor would not be swept for days, and the garbage would not be thrown away for days, making the whole house dirty.

He is probably the kind of fat otaku and useless young man who spends every day in front of the computer writing and playing games with unkempt hair and dirty face.

In the first month after returning home, he lived a very efficient and happy life. From the second month onwards, when he had gradually adapted to this quiet and free life, the initial sense of happiness was not so strong.

I just lived my life. I occasionally cooked for myself or planted plants. In short, I lived a peaceful life. In the third month, things changed. My sense of happiness seemed to be gradually hijacked by a sense of anxiety.

At that time, he didn't have to go to school, and he stayed at home for a long time. Although he was an only child and his parents felt sorry for him because he didn't have to do any work, he felt uncomfortable staying at home for a long time. So he rented a small house in the city and lived there under the pretext of looking for a job.

One is freer when living alone. At home, there is someone to take care of him, but when he lives alone, his life becomes: get up in the morning, eat, play with the phone, play games, eat, play with the phone, play games, eat, wash, play with the phone, play games, play with the phone, and go to bed.

He felt that this would be useless in the long run, so he tried to convince himself to change and began to spend time making the room look more beautiful.

He began to try to declutter, tidy up his wardrobe, put all the unimportant things into drawers and cabinets, and always keep his room as exquisite and bare as a model house. Sometimes when he fell on the bed, he would feel a little empty.

In the tidy room, before the exquisite meal, in the endless silence, he felt empty. This feeling was very complicated. He was not willing to return to the past environment, nor was he very attached to the current environment. This kind of emptiness was not the kind that made people sad, but the kind that made people indifferent.

He didn't feel lonely or isolated, he just felt quiet. It wasn't the kind of full quiet that comes with peaceful years, but an absolute quiet without any emotional color.

Later, maybe a certain situation lasts for a long time, and you will feel dissatisfied and want to change it.

So I started cooking for myself, forced myself to clean regularly, tried to organize my life as much as possible, and started to exercise slowly. This process was actually quite painful and slow.

Because he was really lazy, he always worked hard for three days and rested for two days. After living alone for a long time, he felt that he was in the best condition of his life.

Whether it is the body, mind, emotions, inspiration or desire to create, they are all in a very full state.

Looking back on the past, I can't help but blame myself. I really wasted too much time on too many meaningless people, disgusting things, and negative emotions. How should I put it? At the beginning, I felt lonely and decadent, and longed for someone to accompany and take care of me. Even just to talk to me.

But as time went on, I gradually adapted to living alone. It's hard to describe the transformation. It's like the night before, you were still holding a glass of wine in the middle of the night, feeling sad and lonely like a hamster without melon seeds.

But the moment you wake up the next morning, you suddenly realize that all the feelings, companionship, bonds, and interactions that you had been desperately trying to get are no longer important. Then you spend the day full of energy.

This condition would recur repeatedly, sometimes feeling depressed, and sometimes feeling full of energy.

He sometimes jokes to his friends: "This is the withdrawal reaction."

But once this transition period is over, everything quickly becomes stable and peaceful. You begin to notice many things that you ignored in the past. To exaggerate, your feelings about life suddenly become sharper and clearer.

I can't help but find friends I haven't contacted for a long time and chat with them. I will pay attention to the dust in every corner of the room and try every means to clean it. Open the window to let in the air and let the sunlight in.

Every now and then, I would want to move my desk, computer, and all the furnishings in my room to a new location.

Even if it is a vegetarian meal that you don't like very much, you will be patient to cook it, add seasonings little by little, and adjust the taste. Then you don't have to force yourself deliberately, and life will naturally tend to be self-disciplined.

As your work and rest schedule becomes more and more stable, the time and duration of each activity will become a habit.

Things that bring short-term pleasure, such as games, popcorn movies, alcohol, and hypocritical confessions, are gradually no longer attractive. I haven't logged into the game for several months. I played a certain strategy game for 2,000 hours, but I'm not going to play it anymore.

I even bought a large-scale game on a whim a while ago, but after playing it for less than 2 hours, I felt bored and threw it aside.

I would rather watch some slow-paced movies, even if the style is not to my liking, and read some books that used to give me a headache after just reading two pages.

Over the past decade, he has never been as calm and positive as he is now. He spends no less than eight hours a day writing without distraction, and works out at a fixed time every night, running several kilometers in one breath, or lifting weights or doing boxing.

I also spend at least 20 minutes playing the hand-grabbing game with the adopted kittens. I make the right amount of money, but I have fewer distractions and no more anxiety.

The days pass by neither hurried nor slow. I don’t look too far into the future, nor do I bother to reminisce about the past. I work out, write, watch movies, play with cats, read books, and read the news.

At night, I hugged the disobedient kitten and tickled it with my eyes closed until it purred. Chang'an was happy and full of energy.

In the past, he was too afraid of loneliness. Or maybe he always hoped that life would be full of ups and downs, so that he could live a beautiful life. Now he doesn't think so. He quite enjoys the days of tinkering alone in peace and quiet.

Zhang Jintao spoke calmly, and Zhang Lan understood. If he was still in a certain stage of loneliness at the beginning, he is definitely different now.

It is hard to say whether Zhang Jintao is lonely or selfish now. If what he says and does is true, he will undergo earth-shaking changes within two or three years.

(End of this chapter)