I'm afraid I'm not interested in love

Chapter 390 Paranoia and Heartbreak
"How did you know I was here?"

Su Chengyi glanced at the water ripples blown by the evening breeze on the lake, turned sideways and asked with a smile.

"Here."

Chen Jinzhi raised his chin and motioned for him to look to the other side.

Su Chengyi turned around and saw Xiao Zheng leaning on the pillar of the lakeside pavilion, looking like he was smiling but not smiling.

It seems that he accidentally exposed his location while making a video, so he led Chen Jinzhi to the door.

"Did you come here with him?"

"Yes, he said that the recording studio arranged by the big producer needs to be personally inspected by the artist."

Chen Jinzhi said this half-jokingly.

Su Chengyi said "hmm" without comment.

But with Chen Jinzhi's temperament, she could guess it even without telling him.

Mr. Li had always said that he wanted to come to the capital to see him, and Su Chengyi thought it might be a good opportunity to introduce the two of them to meet.

Then he leaned forward slightly, intending to examine it.

Su Chengyi thought for a while and asked carefully.

Su Chengyi muttered a lot to himself. Chen Jinzhi heard it funny and reached out to cover his mouth.

There was an empty path, and when I looked up, there were only two of them.

What's more, the two of them must be quite compatible and similar in personality and soul.

Xiao Zheng on the other side: "."

Shouldn't.

She sighed softly.

Su Chengyi always felt that Chen Jinzhi was a little preoccupied today.

"What are you talking about?"

So far, Su Chengyi's thoughts have not changed much.

This can be seen from the fact that he can play so well with his grandfather.

During the last celebration of the No. 1 Middle School, Mr. Li once praised Chen Jinzhi. I think the first impression was very good.

"Do you find it inconvenient because there are too many people?"

Could it be that you saw the bow on the hood cord of the sweater?

She shook her head, and Su Chengyi pulled her into his arms as if he had expected it.

This reaction is very wrong.

However, Mr. Li was responsible for everything in this recording studio. When Xiao Zheng was relaying it to Chen Jinzhi, he seemed to have concealed this paragraph, whether intentionally or unintentionally.

Chen Jinzhi held his hand and used his strength to stand up.

"Before going to the recording studio, do you want to walk around the school?"

In addition, as Xiao Zheng said before, the matter of Mr. Li wanting him to pass on the mantle also needs to be discussed in person.

“I have to go to the recording studio in the evening, and I feel like I don’t have enough time.”

"Okay, let's go for a walk."

Is it possible that I and you are only five meters apart? Master, can you consider other people's feelings when you speak? ! At least give the assistant a meal card so they can try the Beijing University cafeteria! Who wants to blow cold wind here? !

"Why not?"

Strange, there should be a lot of people here usually.

After all, birds of a feather flock together and people flock together.

"Ah, you feel uncomfortable because Xiao Zheng is following you. Then ask him to wait for us here for a while."

If you saw it, you wouldn't have this hesitant reaction.

Just like what Xiao Zheng said, although Mr. Li seems to be easy to talk to, he actually has a stubborn temperament that is unique to old artists.

Su Chengyi turned over and stood up, then bent down and stretched out his hand to pull her.

But how to politely refuse Mr. Li is also difficult.

Probably because she was afraid that she would be under psychological pressure.

Before Chen Jinzhi had time to answer, he continued:
"Still think the school is boring and there's nothing to see?"

Chen Jinzhi was amused by his interrogation posture and smiled softly, but he lowered his eyes and did not look at him. He didn't know what he was thinking.

Not knowing what she thought of, she suddenly relaxed again.

At this time, the street lamps on the lakeside lit up one by one, and the tree-lined roads were dotted. The coolness of early spring blended with the warm yellow halo, creating a unique atmosphere on campus.

Su Chengyi held Chen Jinzhi's hand, and the two walked side by side, their falling footsteps echoing deeply.

The avenue is paved with bricks and stone slabs. Compared with the trees with green buds, the bushes on the roadside are quite lush, and there is a faint chirping of cicadas and insects.

When I took a walk with Chu Qingmian after dinner, there were always many young couples in pairs, almost forming a traffic jam.

Su Chengyi thought for a while and realized that there happened to be another large-scale teacher-student social event today.

When I returned to school in the afternoon, I seemed to have seen a promotional banner.

Li Tao and Matthew, who are in the same dormitory, have both signed up to be volunteers, one for volunteering time, and the other for the sake of being in the student union.

The two of them also asked him if he would go, but of course he was decisively rejected.

Matthew also complained that the possibility of an asteroid hitting the earth was greater than the chance of this young master participating in group activities.

Li Tao made a fuss about this, but Su Chengyi himself fully agreed.

For him to participate in this meaningless networking event, he would rather write ten literature reviews.

Although everyone resisted listening to the lectures and thought the content was long, complicated and boring, Su Chengyi felt that he could still learn something, which may or may not be nutritious knowledge.

That wouldn't be considered meaningless and a waste of time.

Su Chengyi thought this while chatting with Chen Jinzhi.

"This used to be the ruins of Shifang. Historically, this was the Shuchun Garden given to He Kun by Emperor Qianlong. He Kun spent a lot of money to expand this private garden. Later, when Jiaqing came to the throne, he intended to liquidate He Kun and Shu Chun. The garden became the most favorable evidence to prove his corruption. He Kun was afraid when he saw Shi Fang here.

But now it has become one of the famous attractions during the graduation season, commonly known as Butiezhou. "

"That's the Linfeng Waiting Tower over there. It was once the place where He Kun and his concubines were raised. Of course, he was later criticized for it. He married a woman who left the palace as his second wife, showing no shame."

"Beyond a crumbling wall, prejudice is waiting for you."

Su Chengyi usually cherishes words like gold, but at this time, like a tour guide, he introduced the architectural ruins of the school seriously and pointed out the direction of the dormitory to her.

"My classes this semester are basically on the South Campus, which is quite close to the dormitory, so I don't take the shuttle bus much."

"The courses are a little more than last semester, but it's not bad. When I'm in my second and third years, core professional courses like civil procedure, criminal procedure, administrative law, and private international law will all be taken together, which will make people feel comfortable." I feel a little bit tired.”

"I didn't expect Teacher Su to feel tired from studying."

When Chen Jinzhi heard this quietly, he smiled.

"Of course, I'm actually the hard-working type."

As soon as Su Chengyi finished saying these nonsensical words, she paused and stretched out her hand to straighten her forehead that was disturbed by the night wind.

"But it's definitely not as tiring as the female celebrities."

Chen Jinzhi is considered tall among girls, but she is standing here wearing a large, ill-fitting coat, as if she could be blown away by a gust of wind.

Strict body management, a diet that can barely meet basic survival needs, and a work schedule that reverses day and night.

It’s weird to be healthy.

Under the light of the street lamp, Chen Jinzhi raised his eyes, and for a moment he was so beautiful that his heart skipped a beat.

This face does not need any make-up to accentuate it. She came here on the high-speed train, and after a long journey, she is now in a bare-faced state.

No wonder they say beauty is not in the skin but in the bones.

Chen Jinzhi's bones are really superior, natural, and completely like a work of art. It’s the kind of appearance that South Korea, which is unknown in plastic surgery technology, can’t reproduce no matter how much effort it takes.

Just too thin.

Su Chengyi sighed and pinched her thin face.

"Female stars are not tired at all."

Chen Jinzhi looked at the gourd and painted the gourd, and also poked Su Chengyi's face.

Then she turned around and kept walking.

Humans are strange creatures, she couldn't help but think.

When a person does many things, she never finds it difficult. Perhaps she has been in the most miserable situation for a long time, so she can accept it calmly no matter what happens.

Only at this time can the defense be easily broken.

As soon as the distress in the eyes of the person she liked spread, she felt as if she had been caught off guard by the flames, and she actually wanted to shed tears.

Su Chengyi, who was two steps behind, didn't notice her emotional changes at all.

At the end of the boulevard, you can see the playground in front, where tonight's activities are being warmed up.

The searchlights dazzled everyone's eyes with their colorful lighting effects, and the bass drum rhythm came from the speakers.

Su Chengyi felt that this scene had the feel of an art performance in the 1990s. It looked a little funny, so she asked with a smile:
"Is it noisy?"

Chen Jinzhi said nothing and stood there, looking at the gathering crowd from a distance.

Su Chengyi quickened his pace, walked to her side, and continued:

"There are a lot of activities like this in school, which are not interesting, and there are a lot of people. Did you see the banners on the road when you came in the afternoon? It seems to be a performance organized by the club. There have been some before. I don't know why there is a parade this time. So big.

Do you want to take a look? If someone recognizes you, they say they are a special guest. "

He said this jokingly.

But Chen Jinzhi's eyes were still on the crowd gathered in the distance, wondering what he was thinking.

The next second, she spoke lightly:

"I was here at Christmas time."

Su Chengyi was stunned, then raised his head and reconfirmed the location of the playground.

To the north, it’s really here!

I didn't notice it just now, but Wan Wan walked over here.

Su Chengyi admired his own insensitivity for a while.

Maybe it's because I've been having such a good time recently that I don't have any sense of emergency evacuation in Shura Field.

Thinking about it now, no wonder Chen Jinzhi was unusually silent today.

Probably from the moment she walked into the school, she had been thinking about the last Christmas.

Su Chengyi was silent for a long time, thinking about what to say.

Even though he knew that silence was the most revealing reaction at this time, he still couldn't speak.

Especially when seeing Chen Jinzhi's expression.

Her eyebrows were drooped, and she looked a little lonely.

Last Christmas, the whole school was in a festive and lively atmosphere, with red and green lights hanging all over the pine trees, and candy canes and chocolates scattered along the roadside.

The crowd was cheering and surrounded by excitement.

In the corner where the colored lights do not shine, Chen Jinzhi comes alone and leaves silently.

It was too far away at that time, and Su Chengyi couldn't see her expression clearly.

But at this moment, I finally saw it clearly.

"Feel sorry."

Su Chengyi paused, and finally could only say this.

I don’t know what I’m apologizing for.

Because speaking of it, it wasn't just this one thing that he needed to apologize for.

Chen Jinzhi seemed to be pulled out of her memories by his apology. She raised her lips and asked as if she was curious:
"Why are you saying sorry?"

"That misunderstanding before."

Su Chengyi felt even more guilty when she asked him this question, and tried to maintain the same tone as usual.

Unexpectedly, Chen Jinzhi seemed to have no intention of struggling with this issue. She tilted her head slightly and looked seriously.

"Teacher Su."

"what."

Su Chengyi responded, even his Adam's apple rolled nervously twice.

"Would it be hard to fall in love with me?"

Unexpectedly, what Chen Jinzhi asked was such a question.

"what?"

Su Chengyi was a little surprised.

Chen Jinzhi's eyelashes trembled slightly, still waiting for his answer.

Only at such times would she show some paranoia.

Although Su Chengyi was not questioned about anything related to the Shura Field, he was even more nervous than before. He moved closer and tried to sound as firm as possible.

"No. Why do you ask?"

"Because many times, I can't be with you."

Chen Jinzhi looked away, her tone was calm, but it made people feel a little sad for no reason.

"I don't know what time you will finish class on Friday. I don't know where the second cafeteria you mentioned is. I don't know why your favorite teacher is the teacher who teaches criminal law."

"I can't accompany you to class, or take a walk with you in the evening when the weather is nice. I can't just walk from one dormitory to another like other people when I want to see you."

"I can't even tell everyone openly that I have a boyfriend, that he is very nice and a great person. If he proposes to me in the next second, I will agree to it in the next second."

"Since the end of the college entrance examination, our pace has been completely inconsistent. It seems that you are always catering to me, and you have done a lot of things you didn't like to do to accompany me."

"So I think you should find it very hard."

Chen Jinzhi sighed softly as he spoke.

“I thought about it a lot after last Christmas.

At first I just felt sad. To say that my heart was broken would not be an exaggeration at all. "

The tone in which she said this made Su Chengyi feel like she was about to be heartbroken.

She has always been a person who is very good at hiding her emotions, so when she talks like this, it makes people feel more empathetic.

"But I don't blame you, and I can't even get angry with you. I just doubt myself over and over again, whether I did something wrong."

"After that, I suddenly realized that my liking and love for you will never be less than anyone else, and I can lose everything I have now for you at any time.

But if I want to be with you, if I want to stand by your side confidently, I can only move forward. It seems that there is only one way to go in my life.

This seems to be an unsolvable proposition. "

Su Chengyi looked into her eyes and suddenly realized that Chen Jinzhi seemed to be crying more and more recently.

She used to be such an invulnerable person.

After Christmas, Chen Jinzhi did not ask further questions, so Su Chengyi took advantage of the situation and avoided talking about it.

He thought things had turned over, but in fact it seemed like she had never come out of that Christmas Eve.

(End of this chapter)