Merry God in the city

Mo Xing looked down, blinked his eyes, and said in a low voice, "Comrade police next door, I have a question."

The man next door said with a sigh of relief: "Well, let's talk."

"I said, your second move is really high. But...what if you don't wear underwear?" Mo Xing coughed a few times and asked helplessly.

There was silence next door.Half a day later, he yelled suddenly: "Fuck, you pervert who doesn't wear underwear, go to hell. Don't you know that not wearing underwear is very harmful to the body? If the sliding door below is opened, it will easily corrupt society. Ethos. You bastard, how can you learn from me, I still want to borrow your use. "

"Fuck, you pervert, don't you also wear underwear? What right do you have to say about me?"

"What qualifications do you have to compare with me, I am a policeman, and I wear underwear outside."

"I haven't worn underwear since I was a child, why are you wearing it?"

"Fuck!" The two cursed again at the same time.

After a while, the man whispered, "Socks are fine without underwear."

"I'm not wearing socks (I'm barefoot)" the two said at the same time, and then both fell silent.

Half a day later, the person next door said in a deep voice: "Since this is the case, then we have to use the third tactic of 'abandoning the soldiers to protect the handsome'."

"Is there any difference from the previous move?" Mo Xing frowned.

"The last trick was a car. If you lose it, you lose it. There's nothing wrong with it. But this time it's a soldier. You can't use it unless it is absolutely necessary." The man next door fumbled for his pocket and murmured: "For example, a soft car Documents, banknotes, girlfriend photos, martial arts cheats, etc., in short, they are all things that you are reluctant to take out on weekdays."

Mo Xing touched his pocket and asked, "Comrade, how many did you find?"

"Are you annoying? Wait a minute..."

The two of them went up, down, left, and right, and they rummaged through everything that had a hole in their clothes.After a long time, Mo Xing said quietly: "Comrade, let me tell you something. First, my girlfriend has never had a photo taken. Second, I was robbed just now, and I don't have a dime on me."

The neighbor next door was silent, and after a long time, he yelled fiercely: "Bastard, are you still a man? As a man, you can't keep a penny on you. You just fall into the toilet and drown."

"Asshole, don't talk about me first, what do you have on yourself?" Mo Xing countered bluntly.

"Asshole, don't underestimate me, I still have a few dollars on me." As he spoke, he heard a few jingling sounds from the next door, and something rolled over from the gap under the partition.Mo Xing bent down to pick it up and saw a one-yuan coin. . .

"Bastard, are these steel coins the money on your body? Do you use these things to wipe your butt? You're not afraid that you won't be able to get it out if you stuff it in." Mo Xing growled, and then stuffed a one-yuan coin into his pocket.

"Well... it's really stuck and I can't get out..." A moan came from the next door.

"...Hey, hey, did you use it? Did you really use it? Don't you really dare to use it? Oh my god, I'll kill this idiot with a single stroke of lightning." Mo Xing almost went crazy.

Hearing a "boom", the man let out a long breath: "It's okay, I'm out."

"Ouch..." Mo Xing almost spat out.

The toilet fell into silence again. Half a day later, the man next door said in a trembling voice, "Since the first three tricks failed, we have to use the ultimate weapon—the big killer."

"The big killer? What is it this time?" Mo Xing obviously lacked confidence in this person.

"A strong man breaks his wrists!" The man stretched out his hands slowly, and murmured, "Brother, do you know what a man's two hands are for?"

"Hey hey hey..." Mo Xing's cheeks twitched wildly, "You can't be...you don't want to..."

"There are only the two of us here, and there is a sink outside. As long as it is cleaned, no one will know, right?" the man muttered in a low voice.Mo Xing's forehead was covered with cold sweat, and he stared blankly at his hands, could it be? . .Is there really no other choice?

"No..." Mo Xing almost vomited after thinking about it, "No, I don't want to do this. I still need to use my jade hands to eat and touch the skin of a cute little girl, how can I be defiled now."

"Small for big." The man murmured, "Do you want to squat here for the rest of your life? Trapped here to death because of a pile of shit? I heard... I heard that if people If you die in the toilet like this, your soul will be trapped in the toilet for the rest of your life, and you will never become a Buddha..."

The corner of Mo Xing's mouth twitched: "Boss, what you said is too much. As long as we persist until the management personnel go to work tomorrow, we will be relieved."

The man didn't listen to what Mo Xing said, and still said to himself: "Shit, is it dirty? How many invisible bacteria and viruses are touched by human hands every day. For example, I don't know how many people have done this toilet." , maybe there will be people with xx disease... and washing hands will definitely make them clean? I don't know how many germs are covered on the faucet, as well as the air and the food you eat...even if No matter how fresh the meat is, it is still a rotting corpse... Humans are full of viruses, so why should I wash my hands? The whole body is a pile of shit..."

"..." Mo Xing was sweating profusely: "The guy next door is about to be driven crazy, right?"

"...If that's the case, then why should I wipe my ass, just go out like this." After a long discussion, the man came to a conclusion.There was only a squeak, and the door of the next room opened, and Mo Xing said in surprise, "Hey, Boss, did you really go out like this?"

There was a moment of silence outside, and after a while, another man's voice sounded: "Li Ke, you are the captain of the No. [-] Operational Detachment of the Secret Service. You don't have any pants on, why are you walking out naked like this?"

"Secret Service...the captain of the fifth team..." Mo Xing almost bit off his tongue.

There was still silence outside, and after a while, there was another "squeak" from the next room.Then Li Ke, the captain of the fifth team of the operation, said: "Brother Ma, have you brought the paper I asked you to bring?"

Ma Qin said angrily: "You bastard, what are you doing going in again? If you want to go in, you have to take the paper in first. I ran back to the city after so much hard work. Is it easy to buy this bag of love?"

"Heart bond?" Mo Xing opened his mouth wide, wishing he could rush out and snatch the package of paper.But at this moment, another voice came from outside: "Brother Xing...Brother Xing? I bought the paper you wanted, and it has a faint mint scent. Are you used to it? No, I'll go back and change to the jasmine scent."

"Liu Yi..." Mo Xing shed tears excitedly, "Xiao Yi, if you were a woman, I would kiss you to death, it's too timely..."

Ma Qin said in a deep voice outside: "Who are you, why do you look so familiar?"

Liu Yi was also puzzled and said, "Oh, so you really think we've met before? Excuse me, what's your surname?"

"My surname is Ma, who is your Excellency?"

"Oh, my surname is Liu."

"..." The two stared at each other for a long time, and then yelled loudly: "You...you...it's you, who fought with me just now. Here you go. You evil dragon killer (you dead cop), go to hell!"

There was a loud "bang", and the single room in the toilet was shaken and creaked.Hearing the sound of gunshots outside, Mo Xing howled miserably: "Hey, both of you, throw the paper in first, and then hit it."

"Brother Xing, Brother Xing, the person next door to you is someone from the Secret Service, help beat him..." Liu Yi just yelled out of breath.Ma Qin immediately shouted: "Li Ke, the evil dragon killer is beside you, kill him immediately."

"Who will destroy whom?" Liu Yi and Ma Qin roared at the same time, and the weapons in their hands collided fiercely.

With a bang, half of the toilet collapsed.

"Screw it." Mo Xing and Li Ke sat helplessly on the toilet, both holding their chins with their right hands, and knocking the falling garbage away with their left hands, "Even if I am a killer (policeman), I still have shit on my ass now." The killer (policeman). Don’t you know? A person with a bare butt has a combat effectiveness of [-] plus.”

Hearing the sound of fighting outside getting farther and farther away, the two of them sighed at the same time.After a while, Li Ke said quietly: "After a long time of trouble, it turns out that you are the killer of the evil dragon."

"I just found out that you are from the Secret Service." Mo Xing sighed.

"Oh, brother, we also experienced life and death just now. As the saying goes, a husband and wife can enjoy a hundred days of kindness... No, it's a hundred days' kindness in a toilet. You won't take advantage of other people's diarrhea and do it in a vicious way, will you?" Li Ke opened the space storage ring, and while tossing the weapons inside, he raised his voice.

"Brother, please, will I attack someone who has the same experience as me? Don't worry, fighting and killing is the most annoying thing." Mo Xing frowned while tossing his space storage ring, "Brother, don't you You will take the opportunity to blackmail me, the reputation of your Secret Service is not very good."

"Oh, brother, you have to trust brother. The most important thing now is to find a way, how to wipe your ass." Li Ke took out a high-explosive grenade and looked at it, estimated the explosion distance, and put it back.

"Yes, yes, I have a proposal. Why don't we go out together and let the wind dry our asses?" Mo Xing casually pulled out a dynamite bag, thought about it, and threw it in again.

"It's not good, after all, we are all civilized people. If this spreads, it's fine to lose the organization. Where can we put our face. After all, the boss is not young, and I haven't married a wife yet." Li Ke suddenly Startled, he said, "Hey, brother, I have a few sheets of paper here, do you need them?"

"What paper?" Mo Xing asked warily.

"Sandpaper for sharpening weapons..."

"Sandpaper... can't this thing be used?" Mo Xing's forehead began to sweat again.

"But at this critical moment, after all, it is a thing with paper. Hmm... Although it is thicker and has more sand, it is still usable..." Li Ke looked at the sandpaper in his hand, his eyes were crazy twitching.

"It's true to say that. In this situation, even sandpaper is equivalent to a bond with fragrance." Mo Xing only felt that his butt was cramping.

"Okay then, I'll share one with you on the basis of the two of us suffering together." As he spoke, Li Ke pushed a piece of sandpaper through the gap under the partition.

With trembling hands, Mo Xing brought up the sandpaper, only to see that the sandpaper was half a centimeter thick, it looked like it hadn't been used, and it was as hard as a steel plate.And there is sand on both sides, and the grains of sand are as rough as rice grains.

Looking at such "exquisite" sandpaper, Mo Xing only felt that not only his butt was cramping, but even his large intestines were being mixed together.

No, absolutely not.If you use this thing to wipe your butt, it will be a trivial matter to bruise and bruise, and you may be disabled for a lifetime.

But this is the only paper. If it is not used, what can replace it?God, I'm going to resist the temptation, resist the temptation. . .

Suddenly, "嗤啦嗤啦" came from the next door, the sound of sandpaper rubbing against objects, Mo Xing was horrified, and tremblingly said: "Comrade from the Secret Service next door, could it be... did you really use it?"

A helpless trembling voice came from the next door: "No... No, there is no other way. There is only... this kind of paper. I'm sorry... Brother, I used it first... Actually, this thing, after use. ...it's pretty cool..."